Hey guys! if its pring break for u i hope u r enjoying it!! I'm super excited for my next few posts! Hope u r too!!
School ended an hour ago and Ashley has yet to call me. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be mad at her still or not. I really wasn't but I was hurt. I mean she never even said I'm sorry for anything. But was that still an excuse to stay mad? Plus she was still with Aiden. Whether he apologized or not, it still gave him no right to slap her.
"Spence, you still in there?" Carmen asks me, she was sitting at my desk checking her Myspace.
"Yeah, sorry, just I don't spacey." I tell her. It wasn't exactly a lie.
"Yeah, you sure you're alright?" She asks again sitting on my bed. I give her my most convincing smile and nod.
"I'm sure, but you know what will make me feel better?"
"What?"
"A kiss or two, maybe even a drive to the park." I tell her toying with her hair. She smiled brightly and pecked my lips once before pulling away.
"Why the park?" She asks. Lets see should I tell her the truth, how I can barely look at pictures with beaches because all it does is bring me back to that photo. The one of me and Ashley, us all happy and having fun.
"I just enjoy watching the little kids play around."
"Yeah, it makes you think," She says kissing me again only this time a little more passionate.
"Have you ever thought about kids?" She asked resting her head on mine. She was kind of jumping the gun don't you think.
"Uh, not really, at least I don't think I did." But something hit me. I don't know what it was or when it happened but I started to remember something. Jade. That name just popped in my head. Did I know a Jade? Jade, Jade, Jade. I repeated to myself.
"Do you want kids?" Ashley asked. We were sitting at the beach, the moon in the sky. We've been here almost all day, but my parents were out on a trip, what they didn't know won't hurt them.
"Um, I don't know. I don't really think about it." I tell her.
"Spence, hey you still in there?" Carmen asked waving her hands in my face. I blinked a few times before looking at her.
"I-I, I remember. Or um. Ashley she." I couldn't speak, this was the first memory I've had in months and it was about Ashley. Why couldn't I have a memory about me. You know something to make me remember what I wanted, what I had planned.
"You remember something?" Carmen asked smiling brushing hair past my shoulder. I smiled at her even though I felt I shouldn't. A tinge of guilt was hitting me. Where it came from I didn't know.
"Yeah, a conversation Ashley and I had. She was talking about a dream she had about her daughter. Or well, her dream daughter I suppose." I thought Carmen would get upset, maybe even a little jealous, but she didn't she started to beam and hugged me tightly.
"Spence that's great!" She said enthusiastically. When she let go I smiled back,
"Maybe I could remember more today, maybe I can finally get my memory back." I said hopefully. Today might be the day! I was so excited.
"Maybe you never know. Now come on, lets go to the park." She said, her smile still shining.
The park was always so peaceful. I wonder if I had a secret memory for why I liked it so much. I closed my eyes trying my best to come up with a tiny shred of a memory as I sat on the swing. Carmen left to get some food. She really was sweet. She always made sure I was taken care of before her and it was nice. I don't recall feeling so cared for. But I'm sure I was, maybe by Ashley. I smiled when I thought of her. I can't stay mad at her forever, I knew that, and maybe today was the day to just drop it. I look for Carmen, wondering if she would mind me calling her, but she's no where in sight. So quickly I dial Ashley's number and hope she picks up.
"Hello?" I can hear her voice shake as she speaks.
"Hey, um. I wanted to, I guess apologize. I really shouldn't have stayed angry. I don't know what came over me." I start to say wondering if it was the right things to say at all.
"No, Spence I'm sorry, and whether you believe me or not is up to you but it is the truth. I love you," My heart stops there and I just hope she doesn't continue. Just let me pretend that she loves me the way I love her.
"You're one of my best friends, I don't know what I'd do without you Spence. You just make my whole life brighter, easier. The whole time you stopped talking to me I felt like I was dead. You were right though, I have no right to tell you what to do. And I won't I promise." She says, and even though it hurt to have her say that I was just her best friend, I could only think how lucky I was to be her anything.
"Ok, um hey you want to meet me and Carmen at the park?" I asked. Maybe I should have left Carmen out of the picture.
"Uh, yeah sure, but Riley might have to tag along. I'm her ride."
"That's fine, I just want to talk." I tell her.
"Ok." And with that said we both hang up. I watch as Carmen comes up with a hotdog in one hand, a water bottle dangling from her fingers, and the same in the other hand.
"Hey," she said kissing the crown of my head handing me one of the hotdogs and water bottles.
"Hey, I invited Ashley to come hang out, she's going to bring her new friend Riley."
"You guys made up?" She asks a small smile on her face. I nod and take a bite out of hotdog listening to the hollers of children and the clanks of baseballs hitting bats.
"This is probably one of my favorite places." Carmen says out of nowhere.
"Why?" I ask and she just looks at me. She doesn't even speak she just stares.
"It's just, too much to go into detail right now, but I'll tell you later." She says swinging slightly.
A few minutes later I see Ashley's car pull up and smile.
"Ash!" I shout to get her attention. God I missed her smile so much. It's been forever since I've seen her smile like that.
"Hey guys, um this is Riley." Ashley said introducing her new friend to Carmen. They shook hand sand an awkward silence came over us four.
"It's a nice day." Riley spoke up. Everyone nodded and the silence came again.
"Spence, can I talk to you in private?" Ashley asks me, and what else can I do but nod and follow. She leads me through the back where there were mostly trees and I notice how she seems incredibly tense.
"I want at least one. A girl," She says. I look at her in amazement. I never would have thought Rocker Ashley Davies would want a kid.
"I dreamt about having one. Not the pregnancy part but I remember that she had blue eyes, brown curly hair. She was beautiful. Her name was Jade." I smiled at her.
"She sounds lovely."
"You want to know the best part about my dream?" She asks me leaning towards me slightly.
"What's that?"
"You were the-"
