Dreams
Friends don't kiss each other... right?
"I don't know if I'm getting a little greedy..."
"Rin, you must have fallen in love with Len."
Chapter 45: Simply
"So... it all happened that way."
Meiko's eyes widened as she covered her mouth in pure horror. On the other hand, Gakupo let out a soft sigh and looked away from her.
"I did... that?"
"Don't worry. Kaito didn't say anything because he knew that you were drunk," Gakupo tried to assure her. "And Rin is trying to talk to Hatsune. I'm sure she will understand too."
Meiko's face fell and she cupped both sides of her head."Gosh... what have I done? This shouldn't happen. The two of them will definitely hate me."
"No, I don't think so..."
"I kissed Kaito in front of Rin and Miku!" Meiko shouted with tears welling up in her eyes. "Miku will hate me for doing this with her crush and Kaito will be utterly disgusted... you know, I did it in front of Rin, his crush!"
Gakupo patted her back and said, "Calm down, Sakine. They are understanding people. You know it."
Feeling the burning sensation in her eyes, Meiko brought her knees to her chest and buried her face between her knees. She had done it. The cat, no, her secret was finally out of the bag. How silly could she get? The relationship which she had been treasuring between Kaito and her would surely be broken just like that. His 'face' was hurt by her. His lips which he had probably reserved for Rin were stolen by her. They had been childhood friend but were never best friends, she had known this better. It was only her who had placed him first in her heart and she knew that he had never looked at her anything more than a friend. She had known this for a long time, but she was still hopelessly in love with him.
Besides, there was a reason why she had gotten so worked up in the afternoon that she drank bottles of alcohol. It was because of Rin. If Rin had not said anything about being 'greedy' for Len's love, she would not be spouting nonsense to everyone, especially Kaito. Seeing her crush liking another person had always been a heartache. But seeing that person never liked him back, instead she like another guy, was even painful. The thought about this made her feel like slapping the senses out of Kaito and shouting that Rin had chosen Len over him. Who told him not to make a move on Rin?
Boy, she was bad. Well, she knew it herself too.
"Kamui, thanks for taking me home but my parents might be back home soon. Please leave," Meiko muttered solemnly as her head still hung low.
Gakupo understood what she meant. She needed some time alone so he just nodded and stood up, getting ready to leave.
"Don't think so much about it, Sakine. Rest well, alright?"
Meiko looked up and smiled at Gakupo weakly. "Thank you."
-:-:-:-
"Hi there! I'm Miku Hatsune! I'm currently busy so please do leave a voice message! I will get back to you later! Thanks!"
"Please pick up the call. Please," Rin begged. "I know you're upset about the incident this afternoom but I'm sure Meiko didn't mean it. She was drunk. So... please pick up our calls, okay? We're worried."
Rin ended the voice message and lay on her bed. The gathering had started out on a happy note but suddenly, it just crumbled just like that. Even their friendships were on the line. She knew how much Miku liked Kaito but had no idea that Meiko liked him too because Meiko always tried to bring these two together despite her feelings. She could imagine that pure shock and the feeling of being betrayed when Meiko had kissed Kaito out of the blue.
Rin sighed. If a girl was to kiss Len, she was sure to be very angry and would beat the hell out of Len. Then, she would chase the girl away and marked Len as hers...
"Oh my gosh, Rin! What are you thinking?" she shouted at herself and ruffled her hair in the mixture of frustration and excitement.
Something was definitely wrong with her. The thought of marking Len as hers made her heart beat rapidly and her stomach flutter. The thought itself was already sick but her excitement was even scarier than what she had imagined. Groaning, she picked up a pillow and covered her face with it. She could not believe it. While she was worrying about her friend, her thoughts were somehow diverted to Len. Every single word he had spoken the day before was sounding crystal clear in her ears as she replayed his husky voice in her head.
Maybe what Meiko had said was right. She was in love with Len. But did he hold the same feelings for her? What if he had never looked at her that way and only treated her as a friend? Furthermore, he might be afraid of her after she had kissed him on the cheek. There was no way she wanted to be just friends after she had found out her true feelings for him! It must be love. She knew it. Those shoujo romances she had read in mangas and novels were the proofs.
"Rin? Are you okay?"
Rin flinched upon hearing Haku's voice. She removed the pillow off her face and looked at her manager who was standing next to the door. As her face turned redder at each passing second, Rin quickly sat up and pretended that nothing had happened. She was not sure how long Haku had been standing there but Haku definitely had no idea what she was thinking about. If thoughts were explicitly shown in bubbles like those of comics and mangas, then it would be extremely embarrassing and she might as well just bury herself in the hatchet... if there was any.
"I... I'm fine, Miss Yowane."
Unconvinced, Haku narrowed her eyes at her and said, "Really? If that's so, don't shout and make a fuss over it. Our neighbours will complain."
"Ah! I'm sorry!"
"Oh yes, the director spoke about you during the meeting earlier."
"Really?" Rin did not know what to feel because she hoped that the director would say good things about her performance but at the same time, she knew she would be reprimanded for doing the performance her own way without permission. "What... did he say?"
"He fired you."
"What?" Rin felt blood draining off her face.
"He wanted to fire you for being stupid," Haku spoke in her usual monotone and with a poker-face.
While Haku seemed controlled, Rin turned pale and her whole body shivered. She thought her life was over. The word 'dumb' repeated in her head over and over again. If only she followed the script and be a person whom she was not supposed to be, she would be fine. Totally safe from being fired.
Rin covered her face and inhaled deeply. She had to calm down and stopped herself from crying. It was too late to cry after all she had done. She remembered her parents telling her when she was younger that most idols and models often put on a good show and lied about themselves. At that time, she could not believe them. But this time, she understood what they meant. Her parents were somewhat right about it and no matter how hard she tried to deny it, it was the truth as she had experienced it herself first-hand, except that she had chosen not to do it and gotten herself fired as the result.
"Rin," Haku spoke in a soft voice. "I'm sorry."
"No, please... it's my fault," Rin's voice came out quivering. "I'm just plain stupid... perhaps I deserve this."
"Listen, Rin. I was just kidding."
Rin looked up again and stared at Haku with wide eyes. "Eh?"
"I'm sorry. Actually, yes, the director was angry with you for messing up the show but what calmed him down was a call from SimpliMe. I'm sure you know what's that."
"Simply-me?" Of course, Rin knew this clothes brand because it was one of her mother's favourite brands found in her wardrobe! "Ah, yes! What was the call about?"
Haku smiled. "Congrats. SimpliMe has decided to use you as their model to advertise their winter wears."
Rin gasped. "Oh my gosh! Really?"
For a moment earlier, she had thought that she would have to return home with a white flag but it turned out that she was requested to be a model for a well-known brand. The clothes that were branded SimpliMe sold and designed clothes for all ages. The price were neither costly nor cheap, and the materials used were quite good. These were the reasons why SimpliMe was a so well-known. To be able to advertise for this brand, it was a great opportunity!
"Yup, good for you," Haku commented with a thumb up. "SimpliMe just saved your arse."
Feeling very much relieved, Rin laughed. "Yeah, yeah, I will thank them."
"Oh, have you called that Kagamine guy?"
Rin stopped laughing and answered sheepishly, "Len Kagamine? No, not yet."
"Remember that the director wants to meet him this coming Friday. If he can't make it, please inform me," Haku reminded.
"O... Okay. Sure thing!"
"Great. I don't know what happened in the Karaoke Box but I'm sure everything would be fine. Sometimes, friends do experience lack of fit but that's the way to build stronger relationships," Haku said as she rubbed her chin as if she was saying some sort of motivational speech. "And... please inform me when you are going somewhere else. It's courtesy but I'm forgiving you this time."
Rin blushed and lowered her head. "I'm sorry..."
Haku shook her head and interrupted her, "Sleep early, okay? Your trainings will all continue tomorrow."
Shocked, Rin gasped and fell backwards dramatically. "Wait! What? Tomorrow?"
"Yes, you still have a long way to go, my girl." Haku flicked her finger and smirked at Rin. "It's simply a long way..."
-:-:-:-
Meiko bit her lips as she looked down staring at her feet. She raised her hand up and held it there a few inches away from the door. Never in her life had she hesitated before whenever she visited him. She would bang his door loudly and barge into his apartment, unannounced at times. Who would have thought that a small mistake would be so detrimental to the friendship between them.
With all the courage she could muster, she lightly knocked on his door and waited. She counted silently to herself and at the thirtieth count, she decided to give another knock. But this time was slightly harder.
"Kaito... I know you're in there. So please... open the door. I need to talk to you," she said.
There was no answer.
Meiko's hand dropped to her waist and she let out a soft sigh. She guessed he would not bother to open his door to a crazy lips-stealer woman but no matter what, she had to apologise to him.
She cleared her throat and spoke softly, "Kaito, even if you're not opening the door, I will just say it right here. I'm sorry. Really sorry. I didn't mean to do that. I know that being drunk is not an excuse but please... forgive me."
Although she sensed no one by the door, she just continued to say whatever came across her mind as her eyes began to turn red and water at each word she said. Her chest really hurt badly and she felt like ripping her chest apart to stop whatever thing that was causing her pain.
"I know... you like Rin and you're upset that I did that in front of her. I understand... I do deserve to be hated but... I don't want to be hated... by you. Only you."
She clutched onto the metal gate and pressed her forehead against it.
"I love you."
I love you...
"I'm sorry."
I'm so sorry for loving you.
"For so long..."
Am I not good?
"... I've loved you."
Why can't it be me? Tell me why, Kaito!
"I'm sorry... Meiko."
A voice interrupted her, causing her to look up and turn around quickly. She saw Kaito standing a few metres away from her with a few plastic bags. She did not care how bad she look with her tear-stained face and red swollen eyes, but all she cared was how long Kaito had been standing there behind her.
"You... you were outside? How... how much... have you listened?" Meiko stuttered.
Kaito forced a smile and replied, "I have no idea. Since you apologised?"
Meiko nearly gasped. That was early!
"So..."
"I'm actually surprised... and glad that someone likes me but..." Kaito paused and looked away. "I'm sorry. I just can't return your feelings."
"Kaito..."
"I'm not hating you or anything like that. It's just... It feels weird, you know? Like you said, being kissed in front of her... it's just weird."
It was Rin again. Rin was so lucky. She did not have to work so hard to capture Kaito's feelings, but she got his attention in the end. Life was so unfair, biased and a massive cheater. It disregarded her hard work but blessed the other who did not even want him in the first place. Feels weird? She should be the one feeling weird. For years she had been chasing him yet she could not reach him, and she was flatly rejected after kissing him by accident. She had known this would happen but she had been convincing herself that she might turn the tables and change his heart. She was neither naive nor delusional. She was just hopeful...
"I know. That's why I'm sorry," Meiko muttered as she hung her head low.
"I'm sorry too for not returning your feelings."
"I... I understand." Meiko shut her eyes and bit her lower lip, forcing herself not to start crying.
Kaito took out his house keys and walked towards her. Upon hearing the clinging of the keys, she quietly stepped aside and stood still until she heard the clicking of the lock. Kaito stepped into his apartment and turned to look at her with his usual soft and kind smile.
"Goodnight. Don't stay out too late."
Hearing his voice, Meiko looked up and mumbled 'goodnight' to him too. She tried to return a smile but her face was to stiff to do so. Without saying anymore, Kaito closed the door behind him. Heaving out a heavy sigh, Meiko fell onto her knees and covered her face with her palms. At each time she felt like screaming and crying out loud, she bit her lower lip harder and harder until it bled.
... and that hope was crushed in pieces.
Hi, everyone! 5 more chapters to go before the end of Part Two! Sadly, I am not prepared for Part Three yet. :X
Before anyone starts ranting about why Meiko seemed to appear a lot in this chapter, I would want to say that this is just part of the story. This is still LenXRin, and sometimes we need some characters for entertainment and bring these two dense people together. :)
Special thanks to the reviewers:
- mirrors02
- SnowQueenStya
- Mimi02
Next, I would also like to thank those who had story alerted and favourited this story. You have made my day!
Preview of the next chapter:
Chapter 46: A Talk with the Director
The director clasped his hand together and said in the tone of excitement, "Would you be interested in working in JUADF? JUADF isn't just a normal agency, you know. Many small fashion companies are under it. A great opportunity, I would say."
"Yes, it's good opportunity but..." Len mumbled as he traced the words on the paper with his finger. "It says here... a diploma in fashion design is preferred. I'm not qualified."
Taken aback by his response, the director asked worriedly, "Not qualified? Why?"
"I only have a high school qualification... unfortunately."
Another missed opportunity.
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