Lars answers the door with a frown, pipe hanging from his mouth smoking something sweet-smelling. "Russia? What are you doing here? I literally just got off the phone with you."
"I'm just walking around," Nikolai says innocently.
"I don't believe that for a second."
"Didn't think you would."
"Then why did you say it? You're just wasting both our times," Lars scolds, leaning against his door frame.
"I'm here for… a friendly chat," Nikolai says.
"And by 'friendly' you don't mean 'friendly' at all."
"No, but it's friendly by my usual standards."
"That's because you're fucked up."
"I won't argue with you on that one," Nikolai chuckles, and Lars raises an eyebrow at him. "May I come in?"
"No," Lars says plainly.
"Rude. What's the point in a big house if you don't let anyone into it?"
"Plenty of space. Doesn't get cluttered. Nice neighbourhood. I like it, and I don't need constant noise for it to pleasant."
"It's great you can afford something as nice as this, though," Nikolai says, "Especially after such an impoverished childhood. And surrounded by rich nations, must have been so difficult."
"Stating the obvious," Lars grunts, "Next you'll be saying I grow tulips and smoke weed."
Nikolai laughs.
"Would you get to your point already?" Lars groans, "I was watching Deal or No Deal."
"Alright. The point is that I'm taking over the world and require your allegiance."
Lars stares at him for a few seconds, then giggles. "And I thought I was tripping."
"You'll be crying if anything happened to your sister."
The laugh drops. "Anything happens to Bella and war will be declared. Besides, she's been wandering around down South recently, you won't find her."
"Spain, I'd imagine," Nikolai says, "I've heard that he and Romano have gone missing," he says innocently.
"Yeah," Lars responds, eyes narrowed in suspicion, "Wouldn't happen to have anything to do with you, would it?"
"Not me, no," Nikolai defends, "It was America."
"Uh-huh. And did America kidnap Søren too?"
"No, Søren hasn't been kidnapped. He's in the General's palace, looking for his family."
"So you kidnapped his family?"
"No! The General did! Really, Lars, is your opinion of me so low?"
"Yes."
"Rude."
Nikolai, after Lars got bored of semi-entertaining him and slammed the door in his face, wanders up to Bella's front door. Her house is much grander and flashier then her brother's. Her front garden is full of Lar's tulips, and Lar's front garden is full of Bella's poppies. With a little magic focus and a deep stare at these poppies, Nikolai had been able to sense Bella in France, heading north with a basket of tomatoes.
While he waits, Nikolai stands on the porch and checks his phone to find an onslaught of texts from Matt bitching about film choice. It seems that Katyusha had insisted on putting on Titanic, then because everyone was crying Lutz had put YouTuber comedy film Kartoffelsalat on, then because several people were thoroughly bored by the terrible humour Gilbert is starting a Disney film marathon, starting with Frozen and moving on to Treasure Planet. Matt seems to have hated every single film so far.
Nikolai laughs, sends a message of "Calm down, just get some ice cream and shut up."
Bella comes wandering up her front path, basket of tomatoes balanced on her hip. She pauses at the sight of a stranger on her porch, but relaxes as she recognises the Russian's face. "Braginski! You scared me!"
"Do you need any help?" Nikolai offers.
"No, I've carried heavier baskets than this," Bella chirps, pulling her keys from her pocket, "I just harvested them from Antonio's garden, he hates the thought of tomatoes going to waste. Probably the only thing that can kill his happiness."
Nikolai hums.
"I need to go harvest some tomatoes from Lovino's garden too, so whatever you need it'll want to be quick."
"I only wanted to talk," Nikolai says, "I can walk with you."
"Really?" Bella says, "You'll want lighter clothes, then, it's warm down south."
As Bella heads into her house, Nikolai casts a quick charm over his clothes. The heavy coat vanishes, leaving him in just his shirt and trousers. His scarf he shrinks, begrudgingly, until it becomes a red bandana, the fixes tight and slightly more noticeable.
Bella blinks in shock, when she sees his changed clothes. "Sorry, I thought… oh whatever. We can get you some lighter shoes and a hat at a market on the way or something."
Nikolai doesn't laugh at her confusion, but follows her merrily. "It's very kind of you to look after their gardens for them."
"I wasn't expecting to," Bella laughs, "They just vanished! But they can't be coming back from wherever they are to messy gardens can they?"
"No, I suppose they can't."
Bella gives Nikolai the side-eye, looking like a shorter, pipe-less version of her brother, "Do you know anything about where Antonio and Lovino have gone?"
"Something like that," Nikolai answers vaguely.
"That's not an answer. You either do know something or you don't."
"Fine then, I do know something."
"Alright, that's a start. Do you know where Antonio and Lovino are?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Where are they?"
"No."
"That wasn't a closed question."
"Fine; they're in Germany."
"Oh, Lovi isn't harassing Ludwig again, is he?"
"Not Lovi, not Ludwig. Flavio and Lutz."
"What?"
Nikolai sighs, stopping. "Look at me. I am the Russia you are used to."
"Really? I thought you'd just dyed your hair. Going for a new look, you know?"
"No. I am Nikolai. Ivan's second player counterpart. I give less fucks about friendship than I do about Americans, and would rather murder than admit failure."
Bella stares at him. "On anyone else, they would be the weirdest comparisons."
"You are not afraid," Nikolai comments.
"Of course not. The second players are our opposites, so as I understand it Ivan tries to be nice but is actually evil, so you try to be evil but are are actually nice."
"Um…. No."
"But that makes logical sense."
"No…"
"Aw, you can't even make an argument," Bella coos, "Bless your heart!"
Nikolai slaps her sharply across the face, "Your point is both incorrect and invalid."
"Slapping me is not going to get you anywhere!" Bella snaps, rubbing her abused cheek, "It's just childish!"
"That's true. But Spain and Romano are second player, and there is nothing you can do about it."
"Are you sure about that," Bella pushes open the gate to Lovino's garden.
"Yes."
"What causes the changeover?"
"Strong emotions and a little bit of magic. Or just a lot of magic. Or death."
"That all sounds confusing," Bella says, picking tomatoes merrily, "But I don't really understand magic anyway. But I do know that nothing makes Antonio happier then munching through a basket of tomatoes, and nothing makes Lovino angrier than Antonio eating all the tomatoes. And I reckon joy and anger are pretty strong emotions, aren't they?"
"But how do you know Tonio and Flavio like tomatoes?"
"Do you like vodka?"
"Yes."
"Then Tonio and Flavio will probably still like tomatoes. Now are you just going to stand there or are you going to help me?"
Nikolai sighs, then stoops to pick tomatoes.
"See you are nice," Bella chirps.
"No, I'm not."
Bella giggles. "Add a curl and a pout and you'll look just like Lovino."
"You need to stop."
"You need to stop trying to convince me that you're evil," Bella flicks Nikolai's nose playfully as he drops a vine of tomatoes into the basket.
Nikolai sighs deeply. With a flick of his wrist, all the ripe tomatoes leap across the field into the basket, then the basket vanishes, teleporting to the other universe. He grabs Bella by the throat and teleports to Holland, fingers digging into Bella's neck, grip cutting off her breathing.
Deal or no deal (Miljoenenjacht) originally aired in Hollad before it became popilar worldwide
Kartoffelsalat (Potato salad) is a comodey produced by German YouTubers. It's really bad.
Matt's more of a creepy/horror kind of guy
Bella gives no shits about people's negative traits. She's a hella chill lady
Nikolai's magic knows no bounds. He's has several centuries general practice, and over 100 years practicing with the amount of power he has now
I own nothing
I am not a crown
-Laurel Silver
