Jude- Eli's insane ex-girlfriend
Chaz- Leeann's husband
Bekah, Abilyn- roommates and friends of Hana's
Jazz and Rais- Amar's parents. They were in Eli's initiation group. Jazz was one of Hana's initiation instructors.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! For all the reviews for the last chapter! You all are wonderful! You have no idea how much I enjoyed finding out what you thought of their engagement.
Kylalovesbabe- I missed responding to you last time. Sorry, things were a little crazy when it was published. Hana and Eli will eventually get out of the "honeymoon phase", but right now they're dating so... we know they will be parents one day and when you are parents... the honeymoon phase drifts away... Tori and Nick? We're pretty sure from the Divergent series that Tori is single so... no Tori and Nick.
And Bahrfamily... thank you so much for covering for me and sending out Eli's POV when the last chapter coincided with me being computerless! You do so much more than a Beta needs to (including correcting my notes even when I don't remember to ask you too)... thank you for sticking with me!
Now, for everyone else...
I have good news and bad news for you.
When I started Dauntless Gray, Milner made the comment to me in a PM that these stories always grow to be longer than you think they will be.
Was she ever right! When I started this project, I saw Dauntless Gray as about 20-25 chapters, ending when Hana got married.
I approached Bahrfamily about Betaing for me. She talked me into ending it at a different point. I thought 40-45 chapters then. Longer, but still manageable.
We're currently as chapter 55, and if you haven't noticed it yet… Hana's still not married.
About two months ago I went through and estimated how many chapters (including those already written) remained to finish the book. I was surprised when I realized that there would be over 100 chapters, well over 100 chapters total by the time I finished.
I took a totally unscientific poll of a small number of people who had reviewed the story and found out that the idea of two books of about 60 chapters each was preferred to one long book over 120 chapters…
So here's the bad news. Dauntless Gray is winding down. I have it planned out that by chapter 64, my original intent of this book will be accomplished and you will be reading about Hana getting ready for her wedding.
The good news (at least I hope you will see it as good news) is that the day I post the last chapter of Dauntless Gray, I will also post the first chapter of "The Blackest Shade of Gray", which will start with Hana's wedding. In "The Blackest Shade of Gray", you will see Hana and Eli's wedding along with Hana's pregnancy and the birth of Zeke, George's rescue from Dauntless, Hana's pregnancy and the birth of Uriah, and much MUCH more (I can't give away all of the story!) So stay tuned, there is more to come, and yes, the epilogue of Uriah's Choosing Ceremony will still take place. It will just be at the end of "The Blackest Shade of Gray".
Thank you all for reading, following, favoriting, reviewing, whatever it is you have chosen to do with Dauntless Gray. I hope you stick around for The Blackest Shade of Gray too.
Sorry for the long note, but I wanted to let you know what was happening.
Now back to Dauntless Gray…
55 Reveal
It is an odd feeling to me, holding Eli's hand while other people are around. There aren't many people on the elevator, and none of them are people I know, so it's a good place to get used to it. At one point I consider pulling my hand out of Eli's, but as if he can read my mind, his hold on my hand tightens at that moment, to make sure that I don't.
I realize, without discussing it, that he's right. In Abnegation, it would be selfish for me to hold his hand and show that we are together when there are people who have no one's hand to hold. We, however, are Dauntless, and for me, it is brave to show that we belong together, that we love each other.
Out of the elevator, we walk along the rough cut hallways to the cafeteria where everyone else will be eating. After the past month, they don't expect me to be there. They also still don't know Eli and I are dating, let alone engaged.
A small knot forms in my stomach. I take a deep breath to calm down as we get close to the cafeteria.
Eli notices and his hand tugs me to a stop. "Are you are okay?" he asks.
I smile. "A little nervous about how our friends are going to react."
"All of them?" He arches his eyebrow at me.
I think about that for a second, and then nod. "Well, mainly Leeann, but if Jude is around…"
He leans down and drops a quick kiss to the top of my head. "Leeann will be ecstatic, and mad, since we didn't tell her." He shrugs. "Everyone else will be surprised, but happy."
I raise my eyebrows at him as a sign that I don't believe what he just said. Then I elaborate on that in one word. "Jude?"
He gives a quick laugh. "I don't consider Jude as one of our friends, but she's engaged to Zane now, so… even though she still tries to sit with us, I don't think it will be an issue." He uses his lip to play with the ring in it while he debates whether to continue. "Although she did hint around that if I changed my mind..." he finally admits.
I nod. "I saw the two of you on the cameras once, and then you were sitting with her today. I was…" I swallow hard. "I was actually afraid you wanted to meet me at the garden to break up with me."
Eli pulls me into his arms, holding me tight. "Never," he whispers into my hair. "That will never happen."
I wrap my arms around him and hold him. My ear presses against his chest, listening to the steady cadence of his heart. We stand there for a moment, while people walk past us into the cafeteria. It dawns on me that no one says anything about it. We're just like any other Dauntless couple hugging. To the people passing us, there is nothing unusual about that.
I feel a rumble of laughter in Eli's chest.
"What?" I pull away just enough that I can see his face.
"The one I'm looking forward to is Nick."
"Well, you've already told me he suspects something."
Eli pulls away and takes my hand again. "He does, but being Nick, he probably won't come right out and ask, at least not at first. This could be fun." He looks down at me, and for a second I think he's going to kiss me again, but instead he simply asks, "Ready?"
I take a deep breath, smile, and nod.
Still holding my hand, he leads me into the cafeteria.
"Hana!" Leeann squeals from across the room. "You're here!" She jumps up from her seat and runs straight to us.
As soon as I see her moving, I disengage my hand from Eli's, ready to return her hug.
"I've missed you!" she announces to me as she throws her arms around me.
"I've missed you too." I return her hug.
My eyes stray over to the table where our friends sit. Jude is there, on the fringe, and already glaring at me. There is poison in her stare. I have to wonder if it is just because I walked in with Eli, or if she, of all people, noticed we were holding hands. Either way, since she is here, this could be a rough conversation.
Leeann lets go of me and positions herself between Eli and me. Either she didn't notice our joined hands, or she's trying to punish us for not telling her. My guess that is that she didn't notice. I'm pretty sure that if Leeann worked in the control room instead of me, she would never have noticed Natalie and all her activities. Leeann slings one arm around my shoulder and her other around Eli's waist. "This is so much better."
From the corner of my eye, I look over her head at Eli. I have to stifle a laugh when he shakes his head at me.
When we get to the tables, it is too narrow for us to walk three abreast. Eli, bless his heart, figures out a way to make it so I am between the two of them. His hand presses against the small of my back. I can feel my face trying to heat up. He's always been so careful not to touch me when anyone else is around that this new experience is both exciting and scary.
Nick smirks at his cousin from the other side of the table. "You seem to be in a better mood."
Eli sits down across from Tori, so I end up in the vacant seat between Eli and Leeann and straight across from Nick. "Much," is Eli's entire response.
Nick watches me sit down, and then looks from Eli to me and back again. He nods. "Glad to hear it." He keeps his gaze on Eli like he's expecting him to add more to it.
Eli just starts filling his plate.
Nick shakes his head. "Eli." Nick draws the name out.
Eli chuckles and puts a pork chop from the serving plate on my plate. He's done that before. Not just for me, but for Leeann, Nick, Tori, Chaz… really, anyone he knows who is seated next to him with an empty plate, but there is something about the look he gives me when he does it that causes my face to flush. I look up and catch Nick watching us. He quirks an eyebrow at me. In spite of the fact that I know I can't do it with just one like he can, I stare back at him and lift both of mine.
We hold each other's gaze for a full minute before Nick finally breaks it and turns to Eli. "I give up. I surrender. Now will you please tell me?"
For a moment the whole group shifts their attention from their food to Nick. Eli stifles a chuckle and puts a bite of food in his mouth.
"Eli Pedrad," Nick growls.
Eli finishes his bite. "Nick Pedrad?" he growls back.
The two of them lock gazes.
Leeann nudges me in the side. "Any idea what's going on with the two of them?" she whispers.
"I think," I intentionally whisper loud enough for the table to hear me, "that Nick is trying to get Eli to tell him if he talked to me before dinner or not."
Nick responds, without breaking eye contact with Eli, "That might be what I want to know. Then again, you walked in here together, so I might figure you did talk, and I want to know how the talk went."
"Why would you care about that?" Eli sounds casual, but he's put his hand under the table, and it's resting on my leg.
"Because I want to know if you," Nick points his knife at Eli, "are going to be in a better mood now!"
Eli squeezes my leg, then lifts his hand and starts eating again, ignoring his cousin.
Leeann leans over to me. "What did you talk about?" She sounds puzzled.
"My recent moods," Eli replies before I can. Anyone who knows him well can hear the laughter in his voice.
My eyes dart between Nick, Eli, and Leeann. It seems fitting to me somehow, that I'm in the middle of the three Pedrads
"Okay… " Leeann's voice is slow like she's trying to figure something out. "You've been in a lousy mood lately," she looks from Eli to me to Nick, puzzled. "She hasn't even been around, so why would that involve Hana?"
Nick rolls his eyes, then answers Leeann but doesn't look at her. His gaze is firmly planted on Eli. "That's why I think it involves Hana. I developed an interesting theory on his bad moods." He pauses for a second. "Didn't you notice, the bad moods started about the same time she," he points his knife at me without looking at me, "started working all day and all night?"
I start to smile, trying my hardest to keep it a small Abnegation smile.
A movement to my side catches my attention. I shift my eyes and my head slightly so I can just see Jude. Her fist is balled up and she's glaring at me. If I didn't have Eli next to me, and she looked like that, I would be scared. As it is, I'm a little worried about what she's going to do when Eli's finished having his fun with Nick.
Leeann looks back and forth between Eli and me several times before settling on Eli. "Does Hana have anything to do with your moods?"
I can almost see the wheels turning in her brain.
Eli quirks an eyebrow at Nick, daring him to answer Leeann's question.
"My theory," Nick takes the bait, "is that these two have been dating behind our backs."
Jazz spits out her drink. Rais quirks his head and looks at both of us. Abilyn narrows her eyes. I know she's looking for tells right now. Jude looks murderous. I do not want to be alone in a dark hallway anytime soon.
"Eli and Hana?" I can hear Bekah testing the idea out in her words.
I blush.
"Yes, Eli and Hana," Nick repeats. "Eli and Hana, who for months, before Hana started working all the time, could never be found at the same time for hours. Then they'd reappear within minutes of each other."
Leeann's eyes go wide. She's starting to put pieces together.
"Hana's been working nonstop for about a month," Bekah throws in.
"Eli's been in a bad mood for about that long," Rais continues.
"Oh, my…" Tori cuts off the next word then looks over at me. "That day I ran into you at the fountain and Eli showed up! You two…"
I can't keep from laughing at the expression her face. She's just realized that she almost caught us.
Chaz suddenly laughs. "Are you kidding me? Eli can't keep that kind of relationship a secret."
Eli takes my left hand out from under the table. He doesn't lace his fingers through it, but holds it from underneath and tilts my hand up. "Oh, I can't…?"
My face turns a new shade of red that not even an Amity artist could capture.
That's all it takes for Nick to finally look away from Eli and look at me.
I hear nearby utensils drop.
"Now was that so hard?" Nick looks at Eli.
I laugh, and Leeann grabs my hand and pulls it towards her.
"Where did you get that?!"
"From your cousin."
"But… what?" She stumbles over her words. "When? How? I mean, I didn't even know…" She turns to the rest of the group. Except for Nick who is smiling at us, and Jude who is openly glaring at me, the rest of them to a person are staring at us with open mouths. "Did any of you know?" Leeann turns on them. Her tone is accusatory. So much so, that if either Eli or I had told someone, I'm pretty sure they would never admit it to Leeann.
"Leeann," Eli slips his arm protectively around my shoulder. "It wasn't a conspiracy against you. We didn't tell anyone."
I realize why he put his arm around me when I see Jude stand. She has her knife from dinner in her hand and she's grasping the handle hard enough that her knuckles are white. No one else seems to have noticed her yet.
"Why not?" Leeann sounds hurt.
"Because we wanted to figure it out ourselves without feeling like if it didn't work, we'd be tearing the group apart and making people pick sides," Eli explains.
Leeann gives us a skeptical look.
I sigh. "Leeann, we needed to do this our way."
"You mean your way." Jude's voice is menacing. The knife flips back and forth as she turns her wrist.
"She means our way. It was my idea." Eli speaks softly, but there is an edge to his voice.
"You led me on." It almost sounds like there are tears in her voice. "You lied to me. You said she was just Leeann's friend."
Eli shook his head. "She was just Leeann's friend when I broke it off with you. I told you it was over between us more than a year ago. You and I had been through for a couple of months before I realized I wanted to ask Hana out."
"You told me you would never get serious about anyone, that you would never get married."
"I changed…" Eli starts, then gives his head a little shake and tries again. "Hana changed my mind."
"I gave you three years of my life, and this little… nothing changes your mind?"
I notice Zane. He's sitting there with a stunned look on his face.
Jude suddenly springs across the table, aiming the knife at me.
Everything happens at once. The cafeteria goes quiet. Nick grabs her arm. Eli stands and pulls me behind him. Leeann grabs her knife and holds it to Jude's neck. Jazz gathers Amar in her arms, and Rais pulls them both behind him.
The rest of our table stands, ready for action.
"Never," Leeann's voice is low and harder than I have ever heard it. "Never, ever threaten a Pedrad. Not a past, a present, or a future Pedrad."
Jude moves back.
"You will lose every time," Leeann finishes.
Chaz stands next to his wife. The knife in his hand flips over and over. I remember him when we threw knives in training. He was deadly accurate right from the first throw.
Jude drops her knife, wrenches her arm from Nick, grabs her tray, and stomps off. Zane waits just a moment, and then follows her.
I sag into Eli. He pulls me to his front and holds me. For a few moments, I shake from nerves, but it doesn't take long for his presence to calm me down. He sits down and pulls me into his lap. I'm so shaken up that I don't even resist, even though I am sitting on his lap in front of most of Dauntless. The rest of our group sits down, too.
Slowly the conversations in the cafeteria start again. Only our group stays quiet.
"Okay," Eli finally breaks the silence. "It turns out you were right to be worried about Jude's reaction."
