Requested by: purple-roses-words-and-love. Ok Friend, I neeeeed(See how many es) a continuation of number for that you just posted, I want to know about that nightmare and have Patrick talk her down, please? 3
"Walk out that door and we're through," Shelagh says, tongue slipping on the knots of words and heart hammering in her chest with such force that she fears it might break her ribs.
Patrick stands completely still on the threshold for just one moment, before sinking his head, relaxing his hands, and saying: "In that case I am sorry, Shelagh, that I have to disappoint you once more."
"NO!" Shelagh screams as he steps out of her reach, tearing and breaking and hurting, oh God hurting so much…
She awakens with a gasp, nightgown plastered to her skin and pulse thundering in her ears.
"What's wrong?" Patrick asks, awake at once and ready to spring into action, fingers reaching to assess the damage, straining and yearning to make things better.
"A nightmare, a terrible nightmare," she sobs, snaking her arms around his chest to feel him close to her, to know that he is not out of her reach, not like that phantom Patrick in her dreams, made of hurt and shadows; this Patrick will never walk away from her, and is there, always.
He strokes her hair and kisses her eyelids, already swollen from crying.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he murmurs, rocking her a little, holding her tight to him with his strong arms and tender hands.
For a moment, she thinks it best to deny she remembers, thinks it best to put these dark emotions away, in a drawer in the back of her mind, out of sight, but that is not how their relationship works, not after they have survived the disastrous adoption interview and that horrible period of loneliness and reaching out, only to be rebuffed.
Now, Patrick talks to her about his feelings, even the bad ones, talks about his fears and memories he'd rather not remember, and she knows she should repay him in kind.
"I dreamed I tried to talk to you, tried to keep you with me by telling you you didn't have to come back if you walked away from me and your feelings again, and then you left," she confesses.
She feels him stiffen for just one moment before his hands cup her face and tilt it upwards, so he can look at her. "I would never leave you, Shelagh. I have been hounded by my personal demons for years, but I will fight them all and strangle them with my bare hands before I let them drive you away," he says, hands tight against her cheeks.
She sees then that her nightmare may have brought him more pain than it gave her, sees it in the way the blood leaves his lips and leaves them tight and stretched, sees it in the dullness of his eyes.
"I didn't mean to upset you," she whispers, and strokes his cheek, his mouth.
"I'm only upset because I love you, and I can't bear to see you hurt," he says, and because she can't bear to see him in pain, either, she kisses him, knowing she will never let him leave, though there is no need for her to feel this way, because they will never be through.
