Zurg sat on the sofa in his hotel room, one leg neatly crossed over the other and his robes folded perfectly around him. The very image of evil dignity, he thought to himself. He never flopped down or stretched out like Warp always did. Zurg remembered one particular occasion when he'd been talking to the man over the vidphone, with Warp laying on a sofa eating a bowl of popcorn, and the oaf had actually had the audacity to belch in his presence! There was simply no excuse for bad manners like that. One of these days he was going to force Warp to take an etiquette course...

Except you can't, because he's not here.

Zurg pushed away that thought and picked up the remote, switching on the TV. He decided he'd finally tune in to some of the new shows he'd commissioned. A rerun of the previous night's Evil Bowling was on and he leaned back, a chortle escaping his mouth as he watched a group of quivering Grubs get bowled over. Now this was quality entertainment.

As the minutes ticked by, however, he found himself shifting and growing listless. Grub after Grub got knocked over, each one letting out an identical squeal. Finally he changed the channel.

"Good morning! I'm Brent Starkisser, coming to you LIVE from—"

Click.

"...and then you add three eggs and a cup of—"

Click.

"Greens and white are definitely out this year, with purple being the latest trend in—"

Click.

"But Monica, you said you loved me..."

Ooh, this looked good. He always loved a nice soap.

"...but now you're telling me Phloomar, your old Phlegmian flame, is the father instead of me?"

Okay, maybe not.

Click.

"Get down to Honest Dave's Discount Shuttles and order your very own—"

"Oh, for the love of evil!" Zurg turned off the set in disgust. "All these channels and never anything good on!" He used to enjoy evil bowling and once would've gladly sat through a fashion show. Suddenly they seemed to have lost their appeal.

"I'm booored," he announced, though there was no one around to hear him. He leaped up from his chair and stalked around the room, hands clasped behind his back. "What to do, what to do?"

He could drop in on the day's Senate meeting and scare a few senators, maybe even take over from Nova for awhile and do some of the decision-making himself. He'd always enjoyed ruling Planet Z, after all, and he missed that feeling of power.

The details of the Galactic Alliance's day-to-day operation interested him little, however. Perhaps it would be best just to leave it all to Nova. He sighed and hummed to himself as he tried to come up with another idea.

He could lead the fleet on an excursion into non-Alliance territory and take over a few more planets. It might be fun—he did love watching things go boom.

A bit risky, though. I'm still rebuilding my fleet after the last battle.

He could check on XL and see how his work was progressing. Maybe the robot had made some kind of breakthrough.

Except he would've called me if he had.

Zurg ran a claw down one of the walls, leaving a trail of scratches in the paintwork. "There must be something to do around here!" Why is Capital Planet so blasted boring?

If he was honest with himself, he already knew the two things he wanted. Planet Z and Buzz Lightyear. Since capturing the Space Ranger (and his counterpart) wasn't looking very promising just then, he turned his attention to the first item. He longed for his planet's grim surroundings. Oh, to be inside his cold palace again and to see the stormy red sky above! It was funny how the place had come to be home to him—perhaps the first place that ever truly had. Nowhere he'd ever lived before had been worthy of the title.

Except maybe for the old palace, he thought, faint memories springing to mind. Before the war...

But he'd been so young when he'd lost all that, and everything since had merely been a place to live, not somewhere he actually belonged, until he found that wonderful red planet of his. Even his native world no longer sprang to mind as home. Planet Z—or Xrgthung as he'd first named it—was where he felt most content. Nothing else would do. Though, he thought, I can't wait to get back to my old world.

He needed XL to hurry up and open that rift. Maybe then his listlessness would pass away. A whole universe would be open to his conquest—nothing would be impossible! He would be the new Natron, reigning supreme over all!

And he knew exactly which planet he would start with.

They thought they could best me. Even the Xlgta thought she could suppress me. I'll show them how wrong they were. They'll learn to regret the day they angered the Evil Emperor Zurg!

Perhaps he'd have been there already, taking his rightful place on the throne and putting them all through exquisitely painful tortures, if he'd just gotten those coordinates from the Xlgta when he'd had the chance. When she arranged to meet him on Sentilla VI, he'd gone there expressly to force her to tell him where the trans-spacial warp she'd come through was. All he'd come away with was a battered body and wounded pride. And renewed determination, he added to himself. It hadn't all been in vain—that determination had carried him through to victory over the Galactic Alliance.

All in all, things haven't gone too badly for me, he thought. There's no reason to complain. XL will figure out how to open a rift soon enough, Lightyear will be found, and everything will be fine. Better than fine. It'll be perfect.

He was just miserable because he was away from home. Well, only one way to remedy that! Clapping his hands, he waited until a Grub scurried in.

"You called, O Vile One?" panted One-Two.

"Start packing! Make preparations for my personal staff and I to leave this planet!" Zurg ordered. "Have my Dreadnought and an escort of ships made ready!"

The Grub's eyes widened. "Where are we going, Your Ruthlessness?"

"Home." The word felt so good to say. "We're going back to Planet Z."

"Everyone?"

Zurg rolled his eyes. "No, not everyone, you ninny! Just me and all my yoghurt-brained henchmen like you!"

"I'm a henchman?" One-Two clasped his hands together. "I thought I was just a lackey!"

"THEY'RE THE SAME THING!"

"No, no, there's minions, then lackeys, and then hench—"

"Oh, never mind!" Zurg stopped him. "You're all morons, so what does it matter? Now, start those preparations! I want to leave as soon as possible!"

One-Two frowned. "Why, O Evil One? Has there been an emergency on Planet Z?"

"No, I'm just sick of this place. No matter how much scrubbing you do, you can never get that good guy stench out. I want to be back in my own home, in my own palace, on my own throne." He sighed. "Nova can run things from here."

The Grub seemed to falter for a moment, then saluted. "Okay, I'll get to work at once, Evil Emperor!"

"Good," Zurg nodded. "Oh, but first there's someone I want to speak to!"


It had been a lonely couple of days. The president hadn't realised how much she'd come to rely on the company One-Two provided. She needed someone to talk to—someone who still seemed to care about her. The rest of the universe had forgotten her, and perhaps it was what she deserved. But that little Grub had stood by her and continued to act like a friend, though she wondered if he even knew what friendship was. Did he get to experience it amongst his fellow Grubs, or was that one of the many things forbidden by his master? It didn't matter now, because she'd lost even that relationship. After that night when she'd been telling him about herself and he'd abruptly left, she hadn't caught so much as a glimpse of him. One of the kitchen Grubs delivered her food every day, but it never spoke to her.

She couldn't think what had caused One-Two to stop visiting her. Had she said something to offend him? Surely nothing that could be worse than the insults Zurg flung at his staff regularly, and the Grub didn't seem to mind those. But if not that, then what?

She'd almost left her room to look for him, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She may have been granted free run of the hotel, but that didn't mean she was ready to face the world. And the hotel wouldn't be enough, anyway. She longed to walk the streets of her city again, despite the pain she knew it would bring her. She missed the smell of oak panelling in her office at the Senate, the view of her private estates from her family's country house (she missed her family less, but she'd never been close to them), and all the little uniquely Capital Planet things that couldn't be experienced from a hotel room.

The door was shoved open. She looked up from where she sat by the window, already knowing exactly who it was. "Zurg," she greeted. "Haven't seen you in awhile."

"Madam President!" he returned in a sickly sweet voice, marching into the room. "What a pleasure as always! I hope you're doing well?"

"I suppose I've been worse," she shrugged. "What do you want, hmm? Run out of your regular victims to torture?"

"Oh, but you are one of my regulars," he chuckled. "I'm afraid that's not why I'm here, though."

"Then what...?"

Zurg snapped a finger. "Grub, see that the ex-president's meagre belongings are packed, won't you?" He smiled to her. "We're going on a little trip."

The Grub that rushed in from behind Zurg was One-Two. The president beamed when she saw him. "There you are!" she said. "Where've you been? I was worried."

"My pets aren't getting too attached to each other, are they?" Zurg frowned. "I don't approve of that sort of thing. Friendship only causes problems."

One-Two gulped, avoiding looking at the president. "Not to worry, Evil Emperor," he murmured. "I serve you and only you."

"You're darn tootin' you do, and don't you forget it."

The president stared at the little insectoid as it began packing her clothes. Why wasn't it acknowledging her? She faced Zurg. "What's this all about? Where are we going?"

"Back to Planet Z." He rubbed his hands together. "Just think of it—home sweet home! I can even have your old cell made ready for you!"

She was on her feet at once. "What?! You want to drag me back there?"

"I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm."

"You can forget it, baby!" She folded her arms. "I'm not going back! I'm not leaving Capital Planet again!"

His eyes flashed. "You'll do as you are told!"

"You don't need me anymore! Just leave me here to feel sorry for myself! Isn't that enough for you?"

"You amuse me," he answered. "I like keeping you around for entertainment when there's nothing good on the tube."

Entertainment? Does he think I'm a wind-up monkey now? "I'm not going," she repeated.

"Yes. You. Are." Zurg turned around. "I expect you onboard the Dreadnought as soon as it's ready to leave. One-Two will see to it, I'm sure."

The Grub nodded, still silently packing.

"Good. See you there, Madam President!" Laughing, Zurg walked out.

As soon as he was gone, the president sprung over to One-Two and grabbed the suitcase away from him. "I'm not leaving, so you can just stop right there," she told him, emptying the neatly-packed contents on the floor.

"You have to," said One-Two. "The emperor has ordered it."

"Well fuck him!" Language, the voice of her old diplomatic etiquette teacher scolded her. She ignored it. "I'm staying put."

One-Two looked up at her with worried eyes. "If you don't do as he says, he'll punish you. Maybe me too."

She sighed. "I don't want to get you into trouble, child. But I can't go back to that cosmos-forsaken planet of his. Home is the only comfort I have left."

"I-I'm sorry," he said. "I wish you didn't have to go. But we have to do what he says."

"Why? Blast it, who is he to call the shots? If you minions of his would only stand up for yourselves, we could all be free! Don't you see? He needs you—if you stop listening, he holds no power!"

One-Two sniffed indignantly. "I'm not a minion," he told her. "I'm a lackey. Maybe even a henchman! I... I have privileges! I'm his personal assistant!"

"Which counts for what, huh?"

He swallowed. "It means... th-that I'm someone! And the emperor gives me this status! I owe my loyalty to him! That's the way things are!"

"It's not the way they should be! Are you just gonna stand by and let people suffer because you have some small bit of power under Zurg?"

"...y-yes!"

She snorted. "Then you're just as pathetic as he's always saying you are!"

"I'm a Grub! I was born to serve him!"

"And you think that's any kind of a life?"

He shrugged. "It's all we've ever had."

"Nonsense, child! Your people must've been something before you were his slaves!"

"We don't remember, so why should it matter?"

"Because no species should be born into servitude!"

"Aren't your LGMs slaves?" accused One-Two.

She shook her head. "Of course not! They work for us by choice. We have an arrangement with them." That was bending the truth a little—they did have an arrangement, but she couldn't say she was proud of how they'd obtained it. Still, it wasn't on the same level as slavery.

"Zurg is good to us," the Grub insisted. "He gives us what we need."

"What he thinks you need. You could be so much better—think of the life you could have without him!"

One-Two's lips trembled. "I... I serve my emperor!"

The president sighed. "I see. Well... I'm sorry for you, child."

"I'm sorry for you too." He picked up the suitcase and began packing again. "If... well, uh... I would help you if I could."

She nodded. "But you won't defy Zurg to do it."

"No."

"I suppose it would've been too much to hope for." She sighed again. "I'm sorry for asking."

The Grub continued to fold the clothes, still looking distressed. She wondered what it was like, growing up as he had, conditioned from birth to serve. To think you were nothing. Maybe it's easier than having that idea hammered into you later in life, she thought, staring around her room and imagining the cell walls she'd soon be returning to.


Zurg didn't have much to pack. He'd only brought the essentials with him from Planet Z, and he was done in a few minutes. Unfortunately, it would still be some time before they were ready to go. He had to give Nova some notice first, so he decided to schedule the departure for the next morning. That would give his staff plenty of time to prepare.

He contacted XL first. "How's the work progressing?" he asked over the comm.

"Quite awesomely, if I say so myself," replied the robot. "I think I'm starting to work out what level of massive boom we're gonna need to open a hole into one of these spacial tunnels. Still got a lot of tests to run, though. Haha, don't wanna blow up the whole galaxy, right, man?"

"Excellent. I have good news for you as well—we'll be on our way to Planet Z in the morning. You can continue your work there, with far greater resources!"

XL paused, his eye widening. "What, we're going back there? The place where NOS-4-A2 almost ate me?"

"It's not like he's going to be there!" Ugh, why do I have to deal with stupidity at every turn?

"Yeah, I know that! He did die on Planet Z, though, I mean what if he somehow got rebuilt and is roaming the halls looking for revenge? But even if he isn't, that place still gives me the creeps!" XL shivered. "Bad memories, man! I don't wanna go back there! I can do my work here!"

Zurg folded his arms. "You're coming back there with me and that's final. I'm sick of all this obstinance I'm getting from everyone! Who's the evil emperor around here, eh? I give the orders, and you people obey!"

Shutting off the vidphone, he left the hotel and crossed the street to the Senate. The Senate meeting would be over by then, so he went up to Mira's office. Sure enough, the Tangean was inside, arguing over the phone about shipping policies. She jumped when she saw him enter.

"I'll call you back," she said hurriedly, shutting off the link. "Zurg, what can I do for you?"

"Evil Emperor Zurg," he corrected her. Would she never learn?

"Whatever." She winced when he glared at her. "Okay, sorry, Evil Emperor Zurg. What's up?"

He sauntered across the room. "I just thought I should inform you that I'll be returning to Planet Z in the morning." He shrugged. "This place is getting a little stifling."

Mira's eyebrows rose. "Y-you're leaving?"

"Yes. Please, try not to shed too many tears at my farewell."

"I think, uh, I think I can manage that," she said dryly.

"You'll continue to run things here, of course," he went on. "I know everything is in capable hands with Mira Nova in charge."

She rolled her eyes. "And you know you don't have to do as much work as long as I'm here, right?"

"You say that like I don't do my fair share. Being an evil emperor is far from a stress-free job, let me tell you!"

"Uh-huh. Maybe on Planet Z, but here you've done nothing but sit in your hotel room." She leaned forward. "Truth is, we won't even notice you're gone. You haven't done anything except redecorate the Senate and order stupid statues of yourself! Statues I had to get made for you! I've been the one organising everything!"

Was everyone going to be rude to him today? "And I appreciate your work, Nova," he answered calmly. "That's why you're sitting at this desk instead of hanging from a containment web as a hostage to use against your precious Buzz Lightyear. But don't think for even a second that I won't put you in that web if your insolence exceeds your usefulness."

"Is that a fancy way of telling me to shut up?"

"Yes." He leaned across the desk. "So SHUT UP!"

She pressed her lips together firmly and said nothing.

"Good. Now, I expect regular reports from you on the situation here. And you will continue to consult me on any major decisions, is that clear?"

She nodded.

"And, Mira..." He leaned closer. "Don't think that you can get away with anything just because I'm not here. No little tricks, no subversions, no secret rebellions. Many of my agents will still be on this planet and they'll have their eyes on you. If you step out of line even once, you'll pay for it dearly."

Mira scowled. "So what else is new?"

He smiled. "You know, perhaps one day, years from now, you'll come to enjoy working for me. You'll see this as your rise to power."

"I don't want power," she snapped. "I'm the heir to the throne of Tangea—I'm set to inherit all the power I'd ever need. And instead of training to become queen, do you know what I did? I joined the Space Rangers. Not everyone is power-mad like you!"

"Then why have you always craved recognition? You've always wanted to be seen as the best, have you not? You always look for the most exciting assignments, and you'll do anything to get them, even disobey direct orders."

"That... that's different. That's about getting the respect and responsibility I deserve," she said. "I worked really hard to get to where I was in the Rangers, so yeah, I wanted people to notice. It was something I actually earned—not something that was handed to me because I'm a princess—so I'm proud of it. It was never about power or control!"

Zurg shrugged. "If it's fame you want, you've gotten that through me too. You're now overseeing half the galaxy—everyone knows your name!"

"I want to be known for my accomplishments, okay? Not just my job!"

"You can have that as well. You've accomplished a great deal already." He didn't like to say it—praise always made people forget their place—but he'd been very impressed by how well she was handling everything. Raids, food shortages, and rebuilding efforts were all being managed with equal efficiency. "If you stick with me, Nova, you can get everything you've ever wanted. I value loyalty among my employees."

Her brow furrowed. "I-I'm not going to be your new Warp Darkmatter. That's what... that's what you want, isn't it? I can see it now—that's what this whole conversation is about!"

He stiffened. Was that what he was doing? Unconsciously looking for someone to replace Warp? He wished he could deny it, but he realised she was right. Still, she wasn't a bad choice for the role. Why not replace one ex-partner of Lightyear's with another? "Think about it carefully before you say no," he told her. "Warp got a very lucrative deal when he entered my employment."

"Huh, gee, didn't stop him from walking out in the end, though, did it?"

Zurg's fists tightened. The betrayal he felt still lingered. "He was a fool. But you, Nova, are smarter than that. You know this is what you want, deep down. You could be the second most important person in the galaxy!"

"I do know what I want," she said. "If I could have one wish, I know what it would be."

He leaned forward. "What? Name it, and perhaps it can be arranged."

"That would be telling." A sarcastic look crossed her face. "And then, y'know, it might not come true. Here's a hint though, three words: You. Not. Breathing."

Zurg glared at her. "You're far too stubborn for your own good, Mira Nova. Be careful not to let that stubbornness be your undoing."

"We Novas have ruled Tangea for centuries," she said. "You know why? 'Cause we're the only ones stubborn enough to get the job done. So maybe you should be careful."

He looked at her in surprise, almost amused. "Was that a threat?"

"Nope, just telling you the way things are."

Spirit and bravery were definitely two things she possessed in abundance. Stupidity also, to speak to him in such a manner. But he was feeling generous enough not to punish her for it. He remembered all the times Warp had talked back to him—it was always infuriating when it happened, but that fire was what had made Warp such a good agent. Nova could be the same, he thought. A pity she clings so strongly to the integrity he always shied away from. He wondered what it would take to corrupt her upright nature. Maybe when he was back on Planet Z he would think of a way.

"Consider my offer," he said. "We would make an interesting team."

Mira's jaw tightened. "I already have a team," she said in a low voice. "The best team in the whole universe, and I will never betray them."

"Then, my dear Governor, we are at an impasse." He sighed. "Perhaps you'll change your mind after you find yourself reading one too many casualty lists, and you realise life isn't as fair and just as you think it is."

"Don't count on it."

He turned away. "Do come tomorrow to see me off, Nova. Until then, ta-ta."

Leaving the office, he took a long, winding route through the building. This was the Senate, the seat of Galactic Alliance government. The place he'd always dreamed of controlling. And now he was leaving it. Part of him almost longed for the old days, when everything was so simple.

Frowning, he walked out the front entrance and left the building behind him. He surveyed the Plaza around him. I have so much now—everything is mine. Was it enough?

I wish I didn't miss that pesky status quo, he thought. I wish this victory had satisfied me! Maybe eventually something will. He headed for the hotel so he could finish his preparations for the departure. At least he had Planet Z to look forward to.