A/N: So very sorry that there hasn't been an update that last two weeks. College (especially Physics) has been kicking my butt. Between homework, studying for tests, four 5-10 page papers (all due right around the same time), and trying not to forget to sleep has been difficult. :D So, please enjoy and I'll work really hard to update next week as well!
The walk to the door of the casino had been nothing but flashing lights- both from some kind of strobe lights as well as flashes from cambots.
As soon as they entered the casino, Kaidan could feel as Shepard relaxed against him. That was something that always funny to him.
Face down a horde of charging Krogan alone with nothing but a pistol? Done, she'd do it without even blinking or even changing her posture.
Stand unarmed in front of a raging, out of control biotic with nothing but her words to calm him?
Done.
Face an Admiral that speaks blasphemy against her ship and crew and put in him in his place- and that place didn't come anywhere close to including in her face or in her decisions.
Done.
Give her a horde of eager reporters with cameras and voice recorders and she was ready to turn on her heel and just walk away.
"I'll get to the ventilation shaft," Brooks informed them. "Wish me luck." Without waiting for any input, she made her way up the stairs and, apparently, to the shaft.
"Liara," Shepard murmured after activating her comm, "any input?"
Kaidan guided her slowly up the stairs so that they wouldn't get run over by the next arrivals.
"Khan has a lot of surveillance set up," Liara warned. "I'd mingle with the guests if you want to look normal."
With a sigh, Shepard set her shoulders and smiled up at Kaidan. "Okay, Kaidan, time to meet the riff-raff."
As they sat down at the bar for a quick drink, Shepard fixed him with a hard stare, as though trying to pull an answer straight from his mind. Oh, he knew what the question was going to be, but he figured he'd let her ask it.
"You know," she finally said after taking a sip of her drink (which was nothing more than a soda), "you'd never've been so bold and open a few years ago."
He didn't reply. For one, that wasn't a question. Secondly, she was right.
"Okay," she said, narrowing her eyes, "I guess I just want to know why you did it."
"Does it bother you that I did?"
She grabbed the glass from his hand and set it down on the bar. "That's not an answer to my question, Kaidan."
"Do you know what you are?" he asked, completely throwing her- that had not been anywhere close to close to what she had expected him to begin with.
Arching her left eyebrow, she decided to play along. Apparently this was going to end up somewhere; she may as well go along with it. "I am a Lieutenant Commander in the Alliance and a Council Spectre."
"Don't be so literal."
With an exasperated sigh, she lifted Kaidan's drink and through back the whiskey. "Okay, fine. What am I?"
"Hope, inspiration." As her eyes narrowed and her mouth opened, he held up his hands to stop her. "No, just listen. For every soldier out on the lines- giving their lives to save a galaxy that denied the truth for so long- you are the inspiration to keep fighting. You're the one who's been fighting this war- relatively by yourself- for years. After all of the defamation and wounds you've endured, you've kept fighting. You died and you came back to keep fighting a war that would take more than another year before anyone would admit it was real.
"For every citizen that is worrying about the annihilation of our entire galaxy, they know that you're out here fighting a battle that none of them can. All of their hope is that you can unite everyone to win this war so that the lives of their children and future generations never have to face the horror that we are- that there may be future generations. You are their hope.
"Problem is that many of the people you're fighting for- on any planet- forget that you're human- an organic with emotions and real-life problems. They forget that you can laugh and cry, love and hate, and all of the others."
Okay, Kaidan had to admit, he was surprised by his long monologue explanation.
Unfortunately, Shepard's face betrayed nothing.
With a completely blank look on her face, she stated, "You kissed me in front of camera so that people would realize that I'm human."
"Commander, I'm upstairs by the grate leading to the shaft. But there's a problem. Can you meet me?" Brooks interrupted from over the comm.
Kaidan took his glass from her hand and guided her through the crowds to Brooks' location. Before they headed up the stairs, Kaidan grabbed her hand to stop her. "Hope, I kissed you because I wanted to. I saw you in that dress and I didn't- don't- care who saw. I kissed you because I love you and I'm tired of hiding it. It's not like there's going to be a court martial in the middle of the war."
"You risked your entire career, Kaidan," she said sternly, but he noted that her face had relaxed from its earlier hardened appearance. "Your career is everything to you."
He flinched internally, thinking back to his words on Horizon. I'm an Alliance- always will be. She wasn't so cruel as to through those words in his face.
"And yours isn't?" he asked, diverting the attention from himself.
She shook her head with a laugh. "Don't you get it, Kaidan? I am Commander Shepard- the tip of the sword fighting this damn war. I was forgiven for treason and genocide. There is very little that I could do wrong that would result in my losing my rank. My career isn't anywhere close to being on the line. You've worked long and hard to reach the rank of Major. Hell, I'm even supposed to salute you."
"None of that matters to me. If I had the ability to go back and redo it, I'd do it again." He wrapped her in his arms and whispered, "Honestly, I'd go back and do it when we were aboard the SR-1. There are a lot of things that I'd change, but that isn't one of them."
Shepard pressed a kiss against his neck. "You're pretty stupid, you know?" she murmured.
"Only for you," he whispered, pulling her back far enough to catch her lips with his.
After a few seconds, Shepard pulled back and glared at all of the gawkers looking at them. "C'mon, Major, before Brooks has a panic attack."
There were times that she hated Kaidan Alenko. There had once been a time when hatred for the man hadn't come anywhere close to existing, but that had changed. Briefly, she had even considered killing him, but knew that it would cause more pain than she was willing in inflict.
At first, it had been anger. But, it was no more his fault than it had been hers, so it had quickly turned to acceptance. However, time moved on.
Had Shepard not died, there would probably have never been a change in her feelings towards the (now) Major. Shepard had died though. That was when everything changed.
It had been her- Dr. Liara T'Soni- who had risked her own life to recover the dead body of the illustrious Commander Shepard. It had been her that had entered Shepard into the deal with the devil. But, despite all of that, it had been because of her that Shepard had been brought back to life.
But who had Shepard run to?
Kaidan.
Shepard had ran to Kaidan only to have him spit in her face- to question the integrity of the woman he claimed to love. Shepard had run to him only to have him break her heart in a way that Liara never would have. And, despite that, she had ignored Liara's advances.
But, Liara let that go. She hated Kaidan for breaking Shepard's heart, but she could understand that Shepard was in pain and wouldn't want to put herself into the same position of potentially having her heart broke.
Then, even after Kaidan continuously questioningly Shepard in a way that Liara never would. Shepard fell back into his arms just the same as if no harsh words and no time had passed.
As Liara listened to the words they spoke to each other over the comm, Liara found it odd that she didn't find herself hating Shepard as well. She just-
"Asari," Javik's voice interrupted her thoughts, "your emotions scream of jealousy and hatred. Do they know?"
Liara gaped at Javik, completely embarrassed that he had picked up on all of that. "I beg your pardon?" she snapped.
"Commander Shepard and Major Alenko, do they know?"
"Does it matter?" she demanded.
Javik eyed her silently for more than a few seconds to the point that she felt the urge to squirm under his gaze. "The Commander values your friendship, but has never thought of you as anything more," he informed her matter-of-factly. "She has all but been Life-Bonded to Major Alenko. Even still, you might let her know that her-"
"Javik," Liara interrupted him, "shut up."
With an irritated look, he turned on his heel to head into the other room. "She is not your Bond-Mate- perhaps it is time for you to look elsewhere. You will get nothing but pain if you continue to pursue her." With those last words, he left her in the uncomfortable silence of the kitchen.
