IT'S HAPPENING *WAVES ARMS*

Yes, I know it has been an obscenely long time since I updated, a lot of you were probably wondering if I would ever post another chapter again. But alas, here it is. But before I give it to you, at least let me give you a reason for my prolonged absence.

Summed up in the simplest of terms, the reason for my inability to post has been a mixture of life sucks and my inability to get my head into writing in the limited time that I have had, I have found myself just staring at an open document and then deciding to go off and play League or something like that. Or, my favorite, being sick for the entirety of July. It has been rather painful to be reminded of my inability to write. But it has actually gotten worse in the last two months, where I've picked up more hours at work. Suffice to say, I get maybe one day off of work when factoring in both the days I work and the day I have to go and assist my grandmother at her home. The days that i do work, I end up coming home mentally exhausted to where writing just isn't in the cards, and the day I do have off, I honestly don't want to "work" on anything. So, it's just been difficult to get any progress going until about last week when I finally ended up writing the last 8000 words of this chapter.

That being said, weekly reviews saying please update soon is actually one of those countereffective things. I know you as the reader think that by doing this you are doing a service in telling me you are interested, but for me, it is an extremely painful feeling to be reminded of my failure as a writer to keep updating in a timely manner. It actually eats away at me. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the reviews and the fact that you are urging me to update, but at the same time, it's troublesome in as well.

It is also the same for my beta as he has reminded me. Neither of us are machines that can just continuously pop out a chapter every week or so. We all have other responsibilities in our lives

Now, on to the chapter itself. To be perfectly honest this chapter is largely filler in that it's establishing a few plot elements for further usage, showing a bit of the personal dynamic between Kallen and Lelouch, but also showing that all is not well with Lelouch. There is a very distinct difference in making the decision to sacrifice lives and then living that sacrifice, and for someone who claims to be different to his peers, it really haunts him what he has done. But also, there is the positive influence that Kallen provides for Lelouch, that allows him to take a step away from being this perfect person who cannot afford to do nothing wrong and allows him to live a little, something he has honestly never been able to do in his life because he has been nothing more than embodied purpose. He is seventeen after all.

Anyways long ass intro aside, here is the chapter, please enjoy and leave me some reviews, I need my flagging writing ego fed lol


Chapter 43

Much Ado About Nothing

I was too young to remember anything about my father when he was killed. Growing up, I was regaled with stories from my mother and his squadmates of him, but to me, he was just that, a series of stories .

Everyone says how His Majesty was like a father to everyone, but for me, he was a father. I still recall the first time he showed up at my home for my fifth birthday. I mean, what person wouldn't in my circumstances. Here I was, some snot-nosed five year old commoner child and the freaking Emperor and Empress of Britannia show up at my birthday party. Completely unbelievable right? But there they were, wishing me a happy birthday and giving me gifts any five year old girl would desire. I still have the stuffed lion that Her Majesty gave me.

But when no one else would come to my birthday, he was there, wishing me a happy birthday and playing with me. It was the strangest thing, here was the man who ruled a third of the world having tea with a commoner child and playing dolls with her.

Yet, it wasn't just birthdays. He would call when I had trouble with school or congratulate me for something I did. It was the strangest thing, I mean, who can claim to have the Emperor of Britannia making personal phone calls to you to see how you were doing. But he did that and more. I had always wondered just why he was so interested in me.

However, it wasn't until I became the Knight of Nine that I finally discovered why when he personally informed me. The truth on what had happened with the Chinese Invasion of Japan, how he had allowed it to happen even though he knew it was coming. Why my father had died.

But I couldn't hold it against him. It was a hard decision made in times that were more difficult than what we live in today. I have a feeling I would be making the same decision if I were in his place.

He could have never cared about me or spent the time that he had over the years with me. Yet he did, and that is why I have always thought of him as a father, despite his actions.

- Lady Marianne Jamison, Knight of Nine, 2041 A.T.B.


Shinichiro Tamaki had to admit, when he had accepted Ariadne's invitation for dinner this was not what he expected in the least. Then again, it should have occurred to him that she would eventually see through the charade, Caedron had been adamant to never underestimate his niece's intelligence. And now his mistake was coming home to roost.

"Eyes front," Ariadne snapped, causing him to turn his head back, "hands up."

"They haven't moved from up, Ariadne," he replied with a sigh, his professional side showing through, only serving to incense her.

"Don't you dare use my name," she snarled, "I know what you were doing. I know your orders."

That wasn't what he was expecting to say the least, maybe seeing through his disguise, but knowing his orders. That was a problem, because if she knew the entirety of his orders somehow...

"Ariadne," he tried again, only to get told to be silent and run through his options. It was unlikely that Ariadne had a capture team nearby, otherwise she would not be here, so that left the more dangerous possibility...

Turning his head oh-so-slightly, he caught her expression which cemented that possibility as the only one judging by how nervous she seemed, as if contemplating what she should do, not something advantageous to his continued health.

That left him with really only one choice to possibility to defuse this situation from its current tension, something that relied upon his unique skillset.

The problem with holding someone at gunpoint in a close-range scenario is that you always placed the initiative in the hands of the captive, a mistake made by many that were uninitiated in situations such as this.

It was all one fluid motion, the toss of the flowers even as he lowered his profile, the flowers hit Ariadne in the face and before she could recover he was already on her, one hand on the top of the gun while the other clasped her hand, preventing her from pulling the trigger. As they vied for control of the firearm, his fingers finally found purchase where he intended, depressing the assembly pin of the gun and ripping half of it away from them, rendering the weapon useless.

But Ariadne, as a trained military officer, despite not being in the field, was not giving up the fight, and drove her knee in between his legs, causing him to grind his teeth at the blinding pain that would have crippled many others that had a lower pain threshold than Tamaki. However, as Tamaki was also trained to have a high pain threshold, he managed to grab her arm in a bruising grip as she attempted to push him away, and causing them both to fall to the couch. The sudden shock of the fall caused her to flop upon him, and immediately he brought his legs and around and locked them behind her behind to prevent her from disengaging. It then became a fight for her other arm as she attempted to punch him in the kidney, succeeding only once before her got a hold of the other arm and began to wrestle it behind her back with the other arm. It was then she began yelling, so he did the only thing that he could think of to shut her up, contorting his body and flipping them around and he pressed his lips into hers as fiercely as he could and forcing her head straight into the couch to deny her any ability to move her head and possibly bite his lips bloody, while denying her the ability to breathe well. The entire time, his eyes were locked onto hers as she looked at him in rage, and some slight fear.

Waiting until he was sure Ariadne would be silent for at least a short time, he brought himself away, keeping his focus solely upon her and not the intimate proximity they were from one another.

"So are you going to kill me now," she demanded, her expression reminding him too much of her uncle.

""No," he finally said after considering his options in this scenario, the target was disarmed, and he had at least changed the situation to where he would have the advantage if she attempted any offensive actions, "that has never been my intention."

Eyes narrowed in response to that statement and he could see the gears turning in her head as she worked over his statement.

"You had orders to spy on and likely kill me," she stated bluntly, daring him to deny the statement.

"I did."

The only path available here was honesty, she knew too much about him for anything else to be acceptable.

"Yet I would not have fulfilled them," he added on, and now he got a bit of startle men out of her. It made sense, they were both practitioners of the age old profession of cloak and dagger, to deviate from orders was a sign of rebellion or inability to remain detached, a veritable kiss of death.

"Oh really? Do tell me why," she sneered at him, clearly disbelieving him given the situation they were in.

It was his turn to be surprised at such a simple question, he had honestly expected that she would dismiss his statement or say something snide, even if it came as out rather heated.

"Because...your uncle taught me to think with my heart before anything else," he said after an agonizingly long pause, "and if something happened to you..."

He found himself searching for the right words to convey his feelings, but found that he couldn't in this case, so instead he devolved to the simplest of expressions, the kind that usually changed everything.

"If something happened to you, I'd be heartbroken...because I'm in love with you."


InF


Ariadne could only sit there in stunned belief at the admission that had been dropped on her like a figurative bomb. On one hand, it was the most blatantly insulting statement that could ever escape the lips of someone of her profession, it was such a breach of their craft that she almost laughed at it, but the other part of her, the less logical and attached to the art of cloak and dagger and remembering the times she had spent with Sheridan, and wanted to listen to what he was going to say. So, in the moment of contemplation, she decided to abide by logic in order to ascertain the truth.

She laughed, in hindsight probably a stupid thing, but she couldn't help it, especially in a situation like this, where a few minutes ago she had ever intention to either capture or kill him, and now he was expressing his love for her. While some part of her knew that this could be a trap to get her to be surprised or emotionally confuse her, the intelligence officer side of her mind was keenly focused on him- and realized that he had made no twitch or any movements at all.

"You're serious," she finally said, realization dawning at the actuality being presented before her.

"I am," Tamaki replied, slowly extricating himself from her and stepping back to allow her room to maneuver.

"How," she guardedly asked, looking for any deceit in his expression even as she ran through her options on how she could possible escape this situation if it turned ugly. So far, Tamaki had not seemed to want to hurt her outside of disarming her, but that could change in an instant, especially if he had supposedly "fallen in love" with her, something that had a certain creep factor to it, "Why? Maybe you have forgotten, but Prince Lelouch and Zero, our bosses, are not exactly friends."

She slowly sat up, getting her legs underneath her in the need to flee from a man Captain Alexander Knight, one of Her Highness' best Rangers, had personally classified as a Tier One level threat after witnessing him in action at Fukuoka. She had fucked up so badly thinking she could take him down, but now she was listening to the idea, and actually thinking, that maybe there was something to what Tamaki believed, at least. Whether she had feelings in this regard were up to debate considering the fact that what experiences she had partaken in were with Sheridan and not Shinichiro, the assassin.

"It's stupid," Tamaki said with a shake of his head, stepping further back, an odd look on his face as he must have realized exactly what he was saying and the type of situation he was in, something she would have easily written off as completely out of character for someone who killed with little effort, "I just...I don't know, just, when I was with you, I could relax and be...human."

He then shook his head again, "I'm sorry, what I'm saying is stupid. I'm sorry, Ariadne. For all of this."

Without another word, he turned and bade a hasty retreat, leaving Ariadne speechless as he swiftly exited her apartment.


InF


"What is it like?"

"Hm," golden eyes came up from the book it was scanning through to meet brown.

"C's World?"

Staring at the source of a question for a few moments, she then closed the book she was reading and placed it down, collecting herself for the question that had been given to her. It was a foolish question…

Then again, the man before her could be the very definition of foolishness, even now. A man who had spent most of his life fighting for what he had believed was right, regardless of who it involved or hurt. And now, now he was nearing the end of his journey.

Yet, even now, she thought as she took in the man who sat in his bed, fast fading the strength and vitality that had defined him, replaced by a gaunt man who looked already looked one step in the grave, yet there was that light of intelligence and life that remained, that beckoned her to answer such a question.

She held his gaze for a few minutes, saying nothing, before he snorted, muttering, "Damned Witch."

Smirking, she went back to her book, her mind wandering back to the circumstances of why she was by Caedron Harrington's deathbed. The simplest answer being that she wanted to understand the man in his weakest of moments, the man that had forged her contractor into a weapon. She knew War, a member of the Four Horsemen, a ruthless, enigmatic man who could commit the most foul of crimes against humanity in pursuit of a perceived better world, but she did not know Caedron Harrington, the man who had raised the orphaned daughter of his best friend and facilitated a rebellion against his former masters.

A sudden, hacking cough pulled her away from her thoughts to watch as Caedron doubled over in his bed, body wracked by coughs. On instinct, she got up and tapped the device to introduce more painkillers into his bloodstream even as she grabbed the oxygen mask set to the side and placed it beside him so he could grab it once the coughs subsided, which he did, taking deep lungfuls of air, even as his exhalation placed small flecks of blood on the mask.

Whatever Caedron had been taking to keep him going had run its course, ravaging his body as much as the cancer. Now all that remained was a man full of stubbornness and pride fighting against the inevitability of his actions.

The sound of the door opening drew her attention to Apollyon, and she caught the look of sadness in her eyes before it was quickly replaced by neutrality. C.C. had to wonder if Caedron was aware of Apollyon's feelings for him, then dismissed it as unrequited, he was dedicated to a cause, not his life. A pity for the woman.

"Lady C.C.," she said, before focusing on Caedron, working him over as he relaxed into the bed, eyes staring up at the ceiling as she worked him over.

"How long," Caedron asked, his voice a croak.

A shake of the head prefaced the answer of, "I don't know. Minutes, hours, days, you've exceeded my expectations."

"Stubbornness runs in my family."

"I know. Tamaki reported in, seems your niece discovered his identity."

"And?"

"He's wiped his place and is on his way here."

Caedron's eyes slid shut for a few moments as a sigh escaped his lips, "Just something else I need to fix before I go. What about Farahr?"

"Nothing."

"That man can't be doing nothing," he forced through grit teeth, "with me out of the picture he has nothing deterring him from working with the rest of the Stadtfelds to remove her."

"I'll have Asim take a closer look."

This seemed to calm him, at least for a moment.

"How is she?"

"She has a date with Lelouch starting in the morning."

A wan smile appeared on his face at that revelation, "Good. She needs a break from all of this. It may be the last one she has for a good while. Is there anything else?"

"No. I'll assign a protective detail for her, but that's it."

"Thank you Allison. I don't know what I would have done without you," he replied, his eyes falling shut.

They both stood there for a few moments, wondering if these were the final moments, only to watch as his chest continued to rise and fall in rhythm.

A soft hitch of breath brought C.C. back to Apollyon, who had removed her mask to wipe tears that had trekked down her face. The woman then remembered she was not alone, replacing the mask, doing an about face, and leaving the room.

"Your people aren't as strong as you think, Caedron," C.C. murmured, moving back to her seat and the book that beckoned to her, losing herself in it within a few minutes.

What she hadn't realized was that Caedron's eyes had reopened after a few moments to look at her before they then closed again.


InF


In no way could Nina Einstein ever be described as anything except high-strung and brittle, ready to snap at any moment. So, the fact that she was sitting in the front lobby of the Stadtfeld Consortium's corporate headquarters awaiting a job interview had notched her stress levels to unholy, even if it was the opportunity to work under the woman who had saved her life back at the Lake Kawaguchi Hotel.

The events since then had been chaotic, to say the least, she had never been presented with the opportunity to thank Kallen, then she had a breakthrough in creating a nuclear chain reaction through fission, but before she could publish her findings, Kallen had called her and asked her if she was interested in working for her. All thoughts on publishing her research fell at the idea that she could provide her savior with a technology that would cause her company to become the most successful in all of Britannia, and then she...

"Miss Einstein?"

She was brought out of her thoughts and fantasy concerning a certain redhead by a figure heading in her way.

He was a black-haired man, tall but not thin. Towering above her, she could see the man standing before her. Wearing a dark blue coat, she noted the unique sunglasses on his face, and the metal hands of his.

"Y-Yes?"

"Adam Jensen, chief of security," he greeted, holding out her hand to her and Nina clasped it, noting the odd coolness and hardness of the hand, and surprised at the gentleness of the grip, "I'm to escort you to your interview."

Nodding in acceptance, she followed after him into an elevator. She then became nervous when she noted Adam had pushed a button that would take them down, and not up towards Kallen.

"We're not meeting with Kallen," she asked meekly.

This earned a frown by the man as he stared straight into her, divining the very purpose as to why this young woman would be interested in his boss.

"Lady Stadtfeld has a prior engagement with Prince Lelouch and is unavailable."

"Oh. Then, who am I meeting with?"

"You will be meeting with Mayura Das, the Director of Research and Development for the company and head of Applied Military Sciences Division."

"An Indian," she squeaked, earning a sharp look from the older man.

"You will find that Lady Kallen employs people based upon the abilities, not their origin. You would do well to also remember that Lady Kallen herself is half-Japanese."

"Oh," she had forgotten that, to be honest, Kallen had never really acted like one of those people before.

The elevator then came to a stop and the doors opened. Adam then led Nina into a lobby where a front desk was positioned.

"Morning Jensen," the guard at the desk greeted, eyes slipping from Jensen to her, "and your name Miss…"

"Nina Einstein, here to see Director Das," Jensen interrupted, earning a few blinks the guard before he turned to type something into the computer, joviality slipping into professionalism. After a few moments, he then got up and walked over to printer that was producing a band. Once that had been retrieved, he then walked back to the duo.

"Hold out your hand, Miss Einstein."

Recognizing the command in his tone, she held it out, and watched as the guard placed the band around her wrist and secured it.

"This is your lifeline, Miss Einstein," he stated carefully, "what you have is an RFID bracelet that is constantly transmitting to the entire building, letting us know where you are at all times. If you deviate from your scheduled meeting with Director Das in any way, you will be detained, interrogated, and from there...well, we have license," he added that last part without any humor in his tone as he stared her straight in the eye, "Finally, anything you witness in this facility is protected by the Military Secrets Act which-"

"That'll be enough Reynolds, I doubt Director Das, nor Lady Stadtfeld, would like for a future employee to be scared out of taking a job."

"Course, Adam," the man nodded, deferring to his superior, "Welcome to the Crow's Nest, Miss Einstein."

She wasn't sure how to take it, a little scared at the man before her and the everything that had just been thrown onto her lap, before a hand lightly grabbed her elbow, causing her to turn around and look to Jensen.

"This way," he said, motioning with his arm for her to follow and she attempted to prevent herself from looking at anything that would get her into trouble, even though it was incredibly difficult due to the fact that her inquisitive mind wanted to see what was being developed here, yet the only thing she could see were numerous digital directions and notifications, as well as status boards describing projects she had no idea on what they could be. It did take away from some of the mystique because there was nothing unique she could witness, but it was still there just by the amount of programs there were listed.

It took almost ten minutes for them to get to their destination, as there were several checkpoints that Jensen had to run his RFID through in order to continue, it was almost paranoid the levels of security that was put in place. Finally, however, they reached the door, and Jensen turned around.

"Wait here, Miss Einstein. Das is...rather unique."

With that said, he accessed the door panel, causing it to open and he stepped through, the door sliding closed behind him, leaving her standing there, looking around nervously expecting a shoe to drop on her because she was unattended in a facility that was working on secret projects.

Before her nerves could claim her, the door opened and Jensen stood there.

"Director Das will see you now," he stated, stepping past her and leaving her the open doorway as the only invitation.

Hesitating, for only a moment, she stepped into the room, and squeaked when it abruptly slid shut behind her, a red flash showing up on the panel showing 'LOCKED' on it. Turning back to the room, she took it in, noting the ornate furniture that was placed throughout the office, but the walls were an entirely different matter, she found her eyes becoming entranced by the walls, some of them covered in digital schematics of Knightmares with a live stream of the same unit beside it, some of them still being worked on, while others were complete. Yet, even as she turned to look around, there was no sign of Director Das.

The sudden opening up of the floor in front of her caused her to jump in the air, as a figure began to rise up from the floor, immediately she was struck by the realization that it was a small lift that was connected to whatever it was beneath them. But it was the woman she found herself glued to, who was off in her own world as she was looking at a large data slate in her hand, even as her brow furrowed in concentration, a lit cigarette hanging off its holder.

A part of her mind balked again at the fact that the woman before her was most definitely not Britannian, the other part was the reluctance to accept that the woman before her was nothing more than an imposter of some sort.

Turquoise eyes flickered up to meet her indigo, before going back to the slate, a soft sigh escaping her lips, along with a dearth a exhaled smoke as the woman turned and walked over to the massive red embroidered couch and flopped onto it, exposing an unclothed midriff and providing Nina with the realization that the shirt that was worn by the Director was only fastened with a single button that did nothing to hide from the imagination of what was underneath. It was this image that Nina found herself intoxicated in, drawn in by the black lace that did nothing but tantalize the flesh that was barely hidden or, to the delight of the more lustful parts of Nina's mind, restrained.

"Not an auspicious start to an interview if your eyes are down there."

Realizing she had been caught ogling, she quickly began to stammer out an apology at the woman, only to stop as the woman chuckled, waving her cigarette holder in dismissal.

"Kallen informed me of your likely tastes, Miss Einstein. I would be more surprised if a person of your repressed nature would be able to keep your hormones in check. Now, please, take a seat."

Nina looked around, not finding a place to sit that had been mentioned by Mayura, only to step back in surprise a panel in the floor opened up and a chair arose from its depths. Looking from the chair back to the Director and realizing that it was what she was to sit in, she finally sat down with what little dignity she had left that hadn't already been shredded.

"Well then, let's begin," Mayura intoned, her hand waving over the data slate and suddenly Nina found herself staring at her research in the hands of the Director who seemed to he giving it her singular attention as it scrolled in front of her.

"That's my research," she squeaked, finding her voice, "how-"

"You should pay more attention to the fine print when you sign documents," Mayura drawled, "when you agreed to attend the Ashford Academy, you contractually removed all privacy that you may have for any research you may do on Ashford Academy resources. It's how Kallen was so interested in your work and she knew when you were nearing completion, we were literally perched on your shoulder reading it as you went."

She sat there stunned by the revelation at the idea that the woman she owed her life to, the woman that she would do anything for, had been spying...

"No," she said, shaking her head, tears forming in her eyes, "she would never do something like that."

"Well, you would be right," Mayura stated cheekily, "in fact, Kallen wasn't even aware of just how groundbreaking your work is until I told her, the actual program was started up by her predecessor. "

"It's Lady Kallen," Nina finally corrected, her faith in her hero rewarded, "or Countess."

"Whatever," Mayura replied, waving her cigarette around in dismissal, though inwardly she was at amused by the dogged loyalty in the young woman, well...loyalty would not be the best of terms, Kallen had made it seem that Miss Einstein had an unhealthy fixation in her that was only added to since Kawaguchi, "that is beside the point. What is the point, however, is what you were planning to do with this?"

Again, Nina found herself taken aback at the direction this woman had taken, blinking as she thought about the purpose of the question but only drawing a blank.

"What do you mean?"

"Exactly what I am saying, Miss Einstein. What are your intentions with this research?"

Giving her a look that screamed 'What do you think?' she spoke trying to keep her incredulity from infecting her tone, "I want for Lady Kallen to use this to revolutionize the world. Energy that no longer is dependent upon the elements that take up a quarter of the space. With nuclear energy, there won't be an excuse why places don't have plentiful energy."

Ending her diatribe she couldn't help but stare down Director Das in challenge in spite of the fact she wanted a job here, she would not accept someone besmirching her life's work, however short it had been so far.

However, she was shocked when the director let out a chuckle, shaking her head.

"Naivete and idealism, a fatal combination."

"What?"

"Tell me, Miss Einstein, do you know the history of Sakuradite?"

"What does that have to do with any of this?""

"It has everything to do with your discovery, Miss Einstein. Now tell me, do you know what the discovery of Sakuradite was originally intended for?"

Nina found herself wracking her mind at this question, unable to come up with an answer. Yes, she had used Sakuradite for her research, but that was a far cry from knowing the history of the material itself. It was her silence in answering the question that Mayura pounced.

"When the energetic and superconductive properties of Sakuradite were discovered it was harkened as the beginning of a golden age of clean energy, it both solve the energy storage issues we had in using wind and solar energy, but it also provided us a fuel source that could replace our demands for oil. For a few years, it was true, Britannia found itself back on top of the world after decades of struggling to catch up, the EU had solved a developing energy crisis thanks to Sakuradite, and Japan found itself as a power broker on the world stage after just coming out of its isolation."

"Then what happened, this doesn't sound like Sakuradite was bad for anyone."

Taking a draw of her cigarette through its holder, she arched an eyebrow, "Tell me have you ever heard the saying, 'A Britannian never forgets'?"

"Yes. It comes from Queen Elizabeth III's last will in reference to Napoleon Bonaparte."

"It is also words Emperor Ricardo III spoke when he ordered the invasions of Canada and Mexico, beginning the Britannia that we know now. It wasn't just the civilian sector that benefited from the boon of Sakuradite, but Britannia had been working on military applications of Sakuradite as soon as it was realized what it could do. Aircraft that no longer needed propellers for propulsion, newer and better explosives, better manufacturing techniques for armor and weapons, coil gun technology, and now Knightmare Frames; those are all Britannian breakthroughs thanks to Sakuradite. How many millions dead since it was discovered? How many millions are now Numbers, Miss Einstein?"

She let that hang in the air for a few moments, before deciding to lay down one of the last blows to the already fragile ground she had left Nina upon.

"And how long until you think your new energy is harnessed into a horrific weapon the likes never seen before?"

"NO! There is no way they would do it!"

"I know for a fact that Prince Schneizel's brain trust at the Dallas Research Institute is researching applications of Uranium-235 as a fissile material, Miss Einstein. How long until you think they will look at your research and realize that it is the catalyst for the completion of their research? And how long until they manage to fabricate an actual weapon based upon that research? And after that, all they have to do is mass produce it."

It was then that she waved a hand and a graphic showed up in front of both of them, showing the final nail in the coffin. It showed a series of artist's impressions that she was able to ferret out of the DRI thanks to a paid source, but it was only icing on the cake to where it showed the perceived explosive values of a weapon that used Sakuradite enhancing the explosive properties of the fission created by U-235, along with a scaled drawing of the radius of its effect.

"That is what the DRI is looking for, Miss Einstein. A weapon that can destroy entire cities, to where its very existence will force all those who are not Britannian into surrender and subservience. A noble goal, maybe, but you know the adage, once the genie has been let out of the bottle, it will not take long until someone else other than Britannia uses it, only this time against Britannia itself. Pendragon. New York. Philadelphia. New London. Imagine that weapon used upon those cities."

"They won't use it as a weapon," Nina gasped, her eyes wide even as tears fell down her face, "they can't!"

"They will," a new voice spoke softly.

Nina whipped around with a gasp, finding herself face-to-face with her idol.

"K-Kallen," she squeaked, completely surprised by the other woman's presence, "I thought you-"

"It's one thing to hear it from Director Das, no doubt you don't believe her, but it's quite different when you hear from me, isn't it?"

Nina found herself nervously nodding at the statement, a pang of guilt at the soft undertone of disappointment in Kallen's tone.

"Before my father's murder Nina, the Stadtfeld Consortium never took part in the military industrial complex, even if it would have made our family rich beyond its wildest dreams. And I think the reason was that he didn't want to have blood on his hands, well, that and my mother, they likely knew that sooner or later her homeland would be conquered and he didn't want to be an accessory to it."

Kallen then strode past Nina and looked at the images, Nina catching her expression as one that seemed sad.

"With his murder, the Consortium was faced with the possibility of liquidation from our competitors who believed that we were weak. I was ten when I told Caedron to spit on my father's memory and get the Consortium into the weapons market, Nina. Today, the Consortium is the largest company in Japan and the largest weapon producer outside of the mainland. Make no mistake, the war machine of the Empire is voracious in its appetite for the implements to wage its trade. If your research gets into the wrong hands, I give less than a year before they field a device Nina, and that timespan includes research, development, fabrication, field testing, and finally mass production and arming the armed forces."

"But...But I just want to help you, Kallen. You saved my life and I-," she broke off when suddenly Kallen walked up to her and gave her a hug, causing the ravenette to blush at the proximity of her crush, just like in one of her dreams. So lost in the sensation that she missed the smirk on Mayura's face.

Kallen then extricated herself after a minute or so, leaving Nina feeling a supreme sense of longing for a return of that feeling.

"I know, and I appreciate it Nina," more than you can ever understand, "and I promise, someday, hopefully soon, that research will be used to improve the world. But right now, we have to keep it secret, keep it safe."

"But I want to help."

"You can by helping me," Kallen replied, watching as Nina looked at her with hope, "I want to hire you to work here, Nina. Your knowledge would be a great boon to me personally. And you can help me make sure that when someone finds out how to create that weapon, we have something that prevents the world from embracing it. You could be responsible for not only creating the energy for the future, but also save the lives of future millions from a hideous weapon."

"I'll do it. I want to get to work right away."

That's when Nina got another hug from Kallen, once again her mind blanking out at the proximity.

She looked to Kallen with glazed eyes as the woman let her go.

"Just go back through the door and Mister Jensen will be there to escort you to get processed. Thank you, Nina."

Nodding, the young woman turned and headed out the door and as it slid shut, leaving the two other women alone. Kallen let out a tired sigh, closing her eyes to keep back the sense of guilt gnawing at her.

"I have to say," Mayura drawled, "that was an impeccable display of acting. You had Miss Einstein eating out of your hand."

And like that, her attempt to control her emotions snapped and she whirled to angrily face the blond.

"I do not appreciate your insinuations, Rakshata," she snarled, "contrary to what you may think I did not enjoy manipulating her. She deserves better than that for the shit she has had to live with."

Taking a deep calming breath to rein in her anger and disgust, she looked at the research, reminding herself why she had done this.

"It's a miracle that Nina is even sane considering her upbringing and life up until now. You've met her father, haven't you?"

"I've had the unfortunate opportunity of doing so, yes."

"Then you know that Hans Einstein is obsessed with getting out of his father's shadow, so much so that Nina has spent most of her life taking care of herself. He sent her to Ashford simply so she wouldn't be a distraction. That does not do well for a young girl's development when she has no parental figure to raise her, let alone the fact that she was raped two years ago."

"That explains a lot about her. Did they..."

"I had Caedron eliminate the perpetrators," she stated, without mentioning that it had been with the orders that it be done in the most gruesome way he could imagine, "Nina, for all her brilliance, is an extremely delicate woman with a myriad of psychological issues that have not been dealt with in a professional manner. Which is probably the reason why she is so easily frightened, and was drawn to me, as I am a female figure that is, in her view, strong."

"You do know that obsession is a double-edged sword, you may be able to use her right now, but in the end, that obsession can bite you in the ass. Especially if she discovers your alter-ego. Given how she reacts to me, suffice to say that she might just build a bomb out of her research if she ever found out about your crusades."

Kallen didn't say anything in response, her mind running through that possible scenario and realizing it was a toss-up on how it could go. Nina had shown some significant anti-Japanese sentiment, so if it came to light that she was actually the leader of an organization that wanted to restore full rights to a group of people that had members that had so harmed her...well, it could either make or break the entire situation.

"We will cross that bridge when we come to it, Rakshata. Now, what are you planning to do with my Guren that has it waylaid for the next month?"

"You remember how we had the Lancelot here in order to allow the Earl of Pudding to work some upgrades into it on our dime."

"I do recall that, yes. We're also fabricating the components for its Judicator upgrade if I remember the contract that crossed my desk yesterday," she then remembered why she had offered the ASEEC access to her resources, "you actually did it?"

Rakshata nodded, "I was actually stunned when I discovered that the Earl of Pudding didn't have anything beyond the basic security protocols on their research. Then again, this was a man who spent the entire budget of the Lancelot on the frame and left out the ejection bloc because he ran out of money and believed it was an unnecessary feature. That man has absolutely no regard for human life beyond what is needed to operate his machines at peak performance."

"Still," Kallen muttered, "Lelouch doesn't like weaknesses…"

A shrug was the only response, "If Prince Schneizel can't rein him in, I doubt even the Demon Prince can keep Lloyd completely in line."

It made sense, the few times she had encountered Lloyd Asplund she was struck at how insufferable the man could get in his own genius. Then again, she mused, reminding herself who she was in the presence of, she had her own insufferable genius to deal with.

"So you are going to use his research to improve the Guren in what way?"

"Not his research, but his assistant's."

"Croomy," Kallen found herself asking, trying to recollect what she knew about Asplund's rather unremarkable assistant and found what she knew rather lacking.

"Yes. It seems she has done quite a bit of work on solving the problem of how to contain and project channeled plasma in a shape defined by electromagnetic bottle. It's not complete, but I just so happen to have the solution to her problem through our own air glide systems."

"And what's that solution?"

Rakshata couldn't resist leaning forward from her chair, a knowing smirk on her face, "What if I told you I could create an energy wing system that could propel your Guren to speeds in excess of Mach One and give it agility unparalleled in comparison to other units, if you could pilot it while doing those maneuvers without losing consciousness."

This time Kallen couldn't help but let a little bit of excitement creep into her tone as she simply looked at Rakshata for a few moments to see if she was pulling her leg before saying, "I'm listening. And don't you worry about me being unconscious, I'm a tough girl."


InF


When he had originally planned the day, he had hoped that he would have the entire day to spend with Kallen starting early in the morning. Unfortunately, that plan had died a swift death once it had encountered the omnipotent demon that was Murphy. When he had arrived at Kallen's estate, he had found, to his surprise, that Kallen was not home, which had caused a bout of momentary worry until he had been able to get ahold of her and discovering that she had been called into work to deal with an issue and was on her way back home when he had called.

So, instead of being able to start their outing, he found himself waiting in the living room of Kallen's mansion awaiting her as she had decided to freshen up after whatever it was that had drawn her to her company this morning, he would have to have Ariadne discreetly look into that.

His phone ringing drew his attention away from his musings as he answered it after recognizing it as Jeremiah's, undoubtedly with news on his sister.

"How is she?"

"They just finished her surgery, Your Highness. According to the doctors, while it looks like a success we won't know until Lady Nunnally wakes up."

Letting out a breath he hadn't even know he had been holding onto, he found himself walking over to the massive windows looking out into the back lawn. Despite his misgivings with Nunnally for choosing to do this, it did not take away the fact that he was both relieved and happy that it looked like they were on the first steps towards Nunnally being able to walk again...

"Your Highness?!"

He found himself ripped back to the fact that he had let his mind wander again, this time with his most loyal subordinate awaiting his word.

"And how soon until then?"

"They are looking at late this evening or early tomorrow."

A part of him wanted to be there when she woke up, to be her brother, but he knew that was not going to happen. Nunnally had made it abundantly clear she didn't want anything to do with him and he would honor her wish regardless of the strife it caused him.

"That's good. Keep me informed, Jeremiah."

He then ended the call, replacing the phone in his pocket before turning to find Kallen standing there. It was both an annoyance and a credit to her training that he hadn't heard her approach.

"Nunnally?"

"Yeah. She just got out of surgery. According to the doctors it was a success, but they are waiting until she awakens to give it their final prognosis."

"That's good. Do you want to-"

"No," he shook his head, "Nunnally made it very clear she wants nothing to do with me right now and I intend to honor her wish, regardless of how I may feel on the subject."

Kallen didn't say anything in response. What could she honestly say in this situation?

Letting out a sigh, Lelouch tabled his thoughts on the matter and refocused upon the reason he was here in the first place, their day out together.

"You have your swimsuit," he asked, taking in the image of Kallen dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt. It was rare for either of them to be dressed in attire beneath their station.

"Yes," came the response, "but you haven't told me where we are going, let alone what we are going to do."

"And ruin the surprise," he asked, this time giving her an honest smirk, enjoying the look of irritation on her face, "don't worry, Kallen, you'll find out soon enough."

"The last time we went out and did something, we ended up getting shot at," she reminded him pointedly.

"Well then, it will be to your relief that we will not be flying in the Gawain today," was his response, that damnable smirk still on his face, "and since it seems you are ready, let's get going, we're losing daylight."


InF


Out of all of the things that she could have imagined Lelouch would take her for a date, nowhere did it ever register into her mind that he would bring her here. Hell, when you thought about Lelouch vi Britannia, you sure as hell did not think to find him interested in something like D'isigny World of all places. Yet, that was exactly where he had brought her for their day out..

Don't get her wrong, she did appreciate the thought that Lelouch would bring her here, despite her attitude and status, there was a part of her that retained happy memories of the time that her family had gone to D'IsNey World when they had been in Pendragon. It had been probably one of the happiest moments in her life when she had been able to go there and experience the world that Baron Walter D'IsNey had created. Even now, she still had in her room pictures that had been taken of that experience, at times wondering in her more darker moments where that cherubic little girl who had a smile that could light up a room had gone and if there would ever be that opportunity to reclaim that even an infinitesimal amount of that innocence.

But that was what she was having as Lelouch led her around, a smile on both of their faces as they experienced both the rides and amusements that dominated this massive amusement park and entertainment complex. It was as they were getting off Space Mountain that Kallen realized something that had escaped her this entire time: Neither Lelouch or herself had been recognized by anyone. That was certainly a different feeling, considering the fact that there was hardly anywhere that she could go anymore thanks to both her relationship with Lelouch, but also the visible public profile she had thanks to both her company and her philanthropic profile, and of course various publications featuring her. Still, the anonymity was something she had not been expecting in the least, but nonetheless welcomed it.

"Like two teenagers enjoying a date," Lelouch spoke, causing her head to snap as she took in the chocolate ice cream cone in his hand.

"Didn't know you were psychic," she muttered in jest, taking a lick of the chocolate as the two of them sat on a bench.

Lelouch offered a shrug as he sampled his own vanilla ice cream, "It was obvious what you were thinking."

"Well, you are right," she admitted grudgingly.

Lelouch didn't respond, instead focusing upon his ice cream cone, just enjoying the atmosphere between the two of them, allowing him to take a break from reality and just be normal for a short time, without any responsibilities that kept him up late at night cursing himself or waking up in a cold sweat.

It was as they both finished up their ice cream that he glanced to his watch, quickly running some numbers through his head as to meeting the schedule he mentally was keeping.

"Want to go and hit the lake?"

Kallen took a look around, doing her own stock of what they had done in the four hours they had been here before seeing that there was nothing wrong with what Lelouch was suggesting.

"Sure."


InF


When Kallen stepped out of the changing rooms, she had to resist the urge to go back in and never come out until she was clad back in her street clothes. The reason of course was because unlike the last time when she wore a one-piece swimsuit at Lake Kawaguchi, she was wearing a black two-piece bikini that while relatively traditional in its cut, provided absolutely no protection from ogling eyes. It also made her conscious of the scar tissue on her arm from where the bullet had entered and exited during the assassination attempt upon Lelouch.

Why was she wearing this? Well, it was in response to the unstated challenge Euphemia had placed firmly in her lap at Lake Kawaguchi. It may have been crafted differently, but Kallen had remembered it as a sort of tongue-in-cheek comment that knocked on her want to show less skin as a futile gesture. So, here she was, feeling quite bare.

Shaking her head at the thought, she quickly double-checked herself before locking the door and heading to where they had both decided to meet up, a stand that was near the edge of the water that went into the massive pool.

It was only after a few minutes of waiting before Lelouch came walking up to her, causing her to frown deeply at the sight of him. Unlike her choice of attire, Lelouch seemed to dress conservative, in swim trunks and a black shirt that clung to him like a second skin.

When Lelouch finally stopped in front of her, he arched an eyebrow towards her, "What?"

"Why are you wearing a shirt," she demanded, poking a finger into his chest.

Her answer was a grimace from the ravenette, as his eyes darted around for a moment, "It's...complicated."

"It's not like you have any scars or anything to be ashamed of," she continued, the finger still digging into his chest.

"No, it's not that," Lelouch quickly responded, "it's just, well, you've seen them, it's not exactly appropriate…"

It then clicked in her head just what it was Lelouch was referring to and she let out a sigh, shaking her head. "Oh for fuck's sakes, nobody would believe it. If I'm going to be out here with hardly anything hiding my tits from prying eyes, then I'm not going to let you puss out and wear a shirt. Do I make myself clear?"

He was momentarily taken aback at the bluntness of her talk, well, maybe not the bluntness, but the crudeness of her verbiage. There was quite a bit of difference between the locker room talk he was used to with his men and having a noble, regardless of the fluidity of that statement, using such a crude term for their bust.

But the entirety of the statement came down to the challenge in her tone as she glared him down, the gauntlet thrown firmly in his face. He could choose to continue making it an issue, or he could accept it and take the shirt off, exposing something that in upper Britannian society was heavily frowned upon. Still, he had a feeling he would not win this argument with Kallen considering the look she was giving him.

"Fine," he stated with a sigh, deciding that discretion was the better part of valor in this case, and proceeded to reach down to grip the bottom of the shirt before pulling it up and over his head, revealing firm musculature and what had been hidden from prying eyes.

Despite having seen some of it before, Kallen couldn't help but have her eyes widen just a small bit at the imagery before her. It wasn't the fact that Lelouch was well-toned in a way that would cause many a woman to feel faint, it was the fact that his well tanned skin was marred with intricate designs done in black ink. On the front of his chest, from the top of the abdominal wall to his collarbone on the left side of his chest was a chainmail pattern that wrapped around the letters "NQM" emblazoned over his heart in Hebrew font.

"There's a reason I always used private indoor pools," Lelouch intoned, mistaking her gaze. He knew that she had seen at least some of it, but it was quite different to see all of the ink that he had over his body. It was partially a reminder to himself of what he was the embodiment of, in his mind, and the fact that it was also done to bond with the unit that he considered a family. It was no secret that a large majority of his army group were not exactly considered 'cultured' insofar as adhering to the norms that were expected of Britannians. But it went far deeper than just that, it was a measure of who they were that they embraced that ideal, because they were never truly a part of the "Ideal Britannian" in the first place.

But for him, it was both a way for him to thumb his nose at his father and the world that he promoted. It was not shame that he had shown Kallen that he was trying to hide what his body was covered in, it was the fact that in upper society, to 'mar' your skin with anything 'unnatural' was anti-Britannian and a major faux pas. The only reason that Guinevere was able to get away with the rose on her breast was because it hid an ugly scar that he had given her. There would be no mercy if what it became public knowledge what he had done to himself.

Instead, it was to his surprise when her hand ran over the intricate design, her gaze enraptured by the art in front of her.

"What does it mean," she asked, her fingers tracing the 'NQM'.

"Retribution," he breathed, his eyes focused upon her fingers at the same time cognizant of their surroundings. It wasn't exactly the the most appropriate of settings for Kallen to admit his tattoos like this. But before he could say anything to dissuade her, her eyes caught the black king piece emblazoned upon his bicep. Entranced by it, she moved closer to it to take a look at it, before she then came to his back and he had to suppress a shiver as her index finger traced over his very first tattoo, "Azrael."

Kallen meanwhile, found herself oddly entranced by both the detail of the tattoos she was looking at, but also the meaning that they held. She knew a bit about Azrael, being the angel of vengeance, but the idea that Lelouch was obsessed with revenge to the point that he would disfigure his skin to such an extent was...disturbing.

Then she was ripped from her musings as Lelouch grabbed her hand, having turned around while she was lost in thought.

"We can talk about all of this later," he said solemnly, "we both agreed to forget everything today and just have fun, can we do that?"

She opened her mouth to protest, her curiosity getting to her, but then snapped it closed at Lelouch's look, accepting the plea in his eyes, even though she could not truly understand why it was a plea. Instead, she nodded, instead taking his hand that was already wrapped around hers, and start pulling him towards the water.

"Come on, then."


InF


Despite what he had said, despite every attempt otherwise, Lelouch could not help but find himself distracted even as he was with Kallen in the water as they both enjoyed the wave pool and just the atmosphere of it all. It wasn't like he was just standing there staring off into the distance, it was a quirk of his to be able to autopilot through things even as he was thinking, but if you paid close attention to him, you would realize that he was not exactly all there at the moment.

It wasn't intentional either, it was all because of his ability to quickly analyze his surroundings that he found himself drawn to a young woman whose smile was obviously forced as she tended to her young daughter in an inflatable tube who looked to be having fun. It only took a moment before he recognized the woman as the wife of Lieutenant Samuel Jamison, who had been killed-in-action at Kasuga. Lelouch had personally paid for Jamison's then-girlfriend to come to the Middle East so the two could be married when Jamison had received news that she was pregnant. He then realized that the likely reason that she was here was simply to take her toddler's mind off of the fact that her father would never be coming home.

And it was all that was needed to draw his mind back to his own guilt at what he had done, while necessary in his mind, had a human cost to it, a cost that would reverberate for years. Even if he could rationalize that what he was doing was for the best, it still did not hold back the guilt that ate at him every day, and to see Jamison's widow here, right now, was like a knife to the gut being slowly twisted. But it was only worse when her eyes left her daughter for a moment and met his, for a moment there was a curious look on her face as she realized he was staring at her, before her eyes widened in recognition, then she smiled sadly as she realized that Kallen was with him, realizing that he was here for the very same reason that she was.

"What's wrong," Kallen asked, causing his attention to be torn away from the woman and back to Kallen. Her head then turned to look in the direction that he had been looking, trying to ascertain just what it was that Lelouch was looking at, but having no luck at doing so. Looking back to him, she caught the mask she had become better at reading slide back into place as Lelouch forced a smile on his face.

"Nothing," he lied, "just my imagination playing tricks on me."

Knowing the futility of prying from personal experience, she merely nodded and instead decided to attempt to take his mind off of whatever was plaguing him.

"How about we take the water slide," she asked, turning her head to the massive construct that loomed in the distance.

For a few moments Lelouch stared at it, his mind unconsciously warring between the fact that his tattoos would be on prominent display and Kallen wanting to do it. He then fought off his reluctance with a shrug, choosing the lesser of two evils as a choice and led her by the hand along to it.


InF


It was after another hour that they had both agreed that it would be best if they went to dinner, Lelouch having finally revealed at least part of his plan, going to see The Hades Connection in a theater. Kallen had seemed oddly pleased by his selection, not knowing that he had an in-road to her thinking to know that she would like a good revenge thriller. Of course, he left off the fact that he still had one more thing after that, but it was better that Kallen didn't know that one.

"Your Highness!"

His hand froze on the panel that would unlock his changing room, his head turning to the source of the voice and meeting the eyes of Samantha Jamison, who had her daughter in her arms. His eyes then glanced past her to note that people had heard her and were now curious as to who she was talking about. Making a decision, he opened up his changing room and motioned for her to come inside, thankful that he was wearing his shirt again.

"I'm sorry," she said, the door closing behind her, her daughter protesting in her arms, "but I-"

"You don't need to apologize," he said, holding up his hand to stave off her apology, "I have always made it a point to treat everyone under my command and their family as my family," it was hard to say that last part with a straight face considering.

"Thank you, Your Highness. When I saw you," the woman started, then realized why she was there as her daughter protested again, "Marianne, please," she pleaded the daughter as she began to cry.

His face froze as he looked to the crying child then back to the woman who was trying to shush her daughter. He had forgotten that they had named their daughter after his mother! Another knife twisted in his gut at the sight before him, his decisions had robbed this woman of her husband and a child her father. It may have been for the best in the long run, but that did nothing to salve the wounds of loss that were his fault.

"I just want to thank you," Samantha said gratefully, "Samuel was so proud to bserve under you and he always talked glowingly about you. I didn't really believe it, but when you paid for everything, I just-," she began to cry, "I can't even begin to thank you."

"You have nothing to thank me for," he replied, the only one understanding the double-meaning in his statement, but the words were like ash in his mouth, "I've always made it a point to treat all of you like family."

In a way, that was true, if he didn't consider his recent choices. One of his first actions once he had been assigned command was to establish a trust fund for the men and women under his command in the event that they were killed in action that their families would not be burdened. Eventually, through wise investments made by himself, he had expanded it both to a pension for the families, a support network, and a college fund for any children of those that served under him. Even though Samantha had lost her husband, she would be able to live without the sorts of worries that many other Britannian commoner families had in regards to the service. It was but one way he could pay them back for being by his side.

"If there is anything you ever need, Mrs. Jamison, do not hesitate to contact me," he continued, pulling every single ounce of his willpower not to show his own distress.

"Thank you, Your Highness," she replied, doing her best from breaking down herself in tears, "thank you so much. Please excuse my selfish desire to talk to you."

"There is nothing to forgive," he replied, letting her leave his room, a warm smile on his face until the door closed behind her before it fell into a look of unfathomable fury. Before he could restrain himself, he launched his fist into the wall beside the door, the pain from the impacted marble shooting down his arm and only adding to the fire. He stood there glaring at the wall, completely lost in thought.


InF


"Are you sure this is the most prudent course," Suzaku spoke, taking his eyes off of the report of the security arrangements for this evening, "I don't think Lelouch would appreciate you pulling this stunt while he is out of the office."

"It's not a stunt, Suzaku. You were there when Lelouch made me Sub-Viceroy and put me in charge of the social and economic affairs of the colony. I am merely exercising my responsibility," Euphie responded, still working on her speech. It was something that drove her aides insane, but it was something that she felt was right regardless of the strain it placed upon others. It wasn't perfect until she was satisfied with it.

"I know that, Euphie, it's just I doubt Lelouch will take this lying down if he thinks you're doing this out of spite."

"I'm not," she replied, looking up from her speech to a raised eyebrow from her fiance letting her know how much he didn't believe her. She sighed, placing down the tablet, "Okay, I'll admit that I'm trying to get back at her, but I'm also doing this for a good reason."

"Yet you're not telling Lelouch about this because you know he will not like it."

"Are you on my side or his," she asked pointedly.

"I wouldn't be saying anything if I wasn't concerned, Euphie, you know that. I'm just worried that you might be pushing a bit too hard. The last thing you need to do is spite Lelouch."

"I'll worry about that if we get to that point," she replied, wrapping her arms over Suzaku's shoulders and placed her head on it, looking at what he was doing, "I still haven't forgotten what I promised you as well Suzaku."

He turned his head up to catch her lips for a moment, knowing full well that she was talking about the pledge she had made to restoring Japan to its former glory. IT was something that they both wanted, but she had been the only one that had the power, unlike him.

"Thank you," he said, meaning it. Knowing come hell or high water, he would support her through it all, regardless of the outcome.


InF


Dinner was a relatively quiet affair for the two of them. Once they had been able to shower and change into casual attire once again they had decided on a relaxing dinner on a balcony overlooking the grand majesty of D'isigny World.

Unlike their more infamous dinner that ended up with them getting shot at, yet had decided on something a bit cheaper in comparison, with both of them enjoying the curry before them. Lamb, seafood, beef, chicken, and even, to Kallen's surprise, calamari curry dishes were set on the table, along with a plentiful supply of naan bread and rice, it was decidedly different and more homely of a meal compared to the overpriced and rather lean meal.

However, unlike that dinner, the atmosphere was comparatively subdued, with Lelouch locked in his own thoughts and Kallen hesitant to raise the matter of the woman and child that had left his changing room that she had witnessed. It was an irrational thought, but Kallen has to wonder if there was something more to all of this. She had to wonder...

Finally fed up with the silence as they both tried to enjoy the dinner, and after taking a moment to take a bite from the buttermilk bread, she finally spoke, trying to end the impasse.

"So," she asked, "who was that woman?"

Even a blind man could see the flinch that Lelouch gave before his gaze fell upon her, eyes boring into her as if in insult for her broaching the subject. His gaze then shifted off her, the refusal to respond to the query only serving to fuel her burgeoning ire that was beginning to grow hot at the possible implications of his reluctance to respond.

"Who is she, Lelouch," she demanded, this time with force in her tone, as she bore down on him, "I saw her leave your changing room. Is she some fun on the side gone wrong-"

A derisive snort followed by bitter laughter interrupted her, as she watched as Lelouch shook his head before covering his eyes with a hand as he shook his head. This only served to incense her, but before she said anything more, she heard it, or at least she swore she heard it, a faint whisper escaping his lips.

"I only wish."

That firmly killed whatever momentum she had in reaching her initial conclusion. It was a stupid thought, to be honest, but Lelouch had amassed himself some popularity as a bit of a ladies' man, so it wasn't that far of a conclusion to make. But now, with the evident sorrow and some sort of guilt in his body language, she knew it was something else entirely. Dipping her head, she returned back to eating in the uncomfortable silence.

"Her name is Samantha Jamison," Lelouch spoke softly, his head coming back and meeting her gaze as she looked up to him, "her husband was Lieutenant Samuel Jamison. He was killed at Kasuga during the invasion, leaving her widowed and their daughter without a father. What she was doing was thanking me for the fact that I have ensured over the years that anyone under my command would not have to worry about loved ones they would leave behind in the event they were were to die under my command."

"Oh," she said, at a loss for words, thoroughly ashamed at the fact that she had been jealous of a woman who had just lost her spouse.

Lelouch sighed, taking a bite of his food, though he didn't even notice the delicious taste of the meal. Instead his mind was on the things he couldn't say to Kallen, things he wanted to scream to the world for his complicity in the murder of his men. Instead, he could only remain silent, for the sake of peace.

"I am responsible for the lives of forty-three thousand, one hundred, and sixty eight men and women under my command. Every choice I make has to be made with the weight of their lives in the balance. They are not a number to me, they have names, they have lives, they have dreams and desires like us, and any mistake I make can end theirs."

"And do you think you have made a mistake," Kallen cut in.

"Yes."

That simple declaration hung over the pair for a few moments, blue silently dueling with amethyst before one finally gave in.

"Caedron once told me that it's not the decisions that make us, it's how we handle the result of our decisions that define us. So tell me, Lelouch, how are you going to let this define you?"

That was the question, wasn't it. Kallen was right, in a way, he was letting his misgivings rule him instead of making sure that the sacrificed lives would not have been spent in vain. It was silly, the fact that it took the woman who was fighting against him to remind him of something he should be perfectly aware of in the first place.

He sighed, shaking his head even as his lips quirked up a slight amount, causing Kallen's frown to deepen, wondering if Lelouch had cracked or if there was something else going on behind that mask.

"Thank you," he finally said, Kallen's expression shifting to one of confusion, "Ever since the end of the invasion I've been struggling with the choices I made, even though I should be used to them by now. I actually forgot why I was doing all of this," he then shook his head again, as if dismissing his own temporary insanity.

"And why are you doing this," Kallen couldn't help but ask.

"You saw the reason," he responded, dipping the naan bread into some lamb curry and taking a bite of the bread, enjoying the conflicting tastes as he rediscovered his appetite.

"Revenge? Really?"

"Not revenge," Lelouch replied, "revenge is a selfish pursuit that always ends up being more self-destructive than cathartic, usually leaving you a shell of yourself. The NQM in the chainmail is meant to say that I shield my heart with the need for retribution against those who have wronged me. I have another tattoo on my back, of Azrael."

"The angel of death? That doesn't exactly help your case."

"Azrael does have a lot of connections with death," he agreed, "however, in Hebrew, the name literally means One Whom God Helps."

"So you think that you're one of those people that think that God has their back."

A laugh put that thought quickly to an end, as Lelouch shook his head, "Of course not," he continued chuckling, thankful for something so refreshing compared to the depressing thoughts that had dominated him lately, "If God had my back, I doubt he would have had my mother killed and left my sister a cripple. No, if there is one thing that any combat veteran knows, it's that God is most assuredly not there for them. Because if he were, they would not be stuck getting shot at, wondering if their next breath will be their last."

"Then what is it? Because you are not exactly illuminating what you trying to say."

Placing down his fork, he leaned back in the chair slightly, "There are roles that Azrael fulfills, depending upon the religion that he is portrayed in. In Islam, he is considered the embodiment of death, in Judaism he is both a general of angels and the recipient of the prayers of the faithful when they reach heaven, while in the Sikh religion, however, he is portrayed as an avenging angel, or rather, the incarnation of retribution for those who are sinful or unrepentant for their actions."

Kallen found herself watching as Lelouch talked, interested in what he was saying, because this was honestly a lot different than any discussion they had ever had before. Sure, she knew that Lelouch was well educated, but what he was talking about here were things that you never expected a seventeen year old of all things to know and have a deep philosophical accord with, yet that was what she was seeing right before her.

"To me, however, Azrael is something far more, at least, to what I believe. He's natural order. Think about it in this way, every action has a consequence, everything that you do will in some way, either subtly or significantly, impact everyone around you. Death, in the regards that you think, is not simply the act of ceasing to be, but it can be about healing and rebirth. When my mother was assassinated, my innocence died, I was left with a choice, I could either give up and doom Nunnally to a life where she would likely never have the opportunities that she does now, or I could fight, I could change into who I am now. But it's even deeper than that, to me, it's not just changing myself for the better, but it is to destroy what is wrong with our world, Kallen. To me, that throne, the throne of the Emperor, is not the goal, it's what comes with it. I want to right what has been wronged in my life, but I also want to right what has been incurred upon everyone by my family and predecessors. I guess you could say, as silly as it sounds, that where people have their idols as some person, I look to religion, even though I don't identify with any of them, for my inspiration and identity."

Kallen could help but stare at him now, trying to come to grips with what Lelouch had just said and having difficulty doing so. It wasn't just what he said, no, it was how he said it that was causing alarm bells to go off in her head. What Lelouch was saying was the kind of things only the most zealous or insane people could ever say, the idea that he identified with an angel of all things, that he was obsessed with retribution of all things. It was...outside of the religion...like herself and it scared her.

"And what is this," she demanded, an edge to her voice, because she would be damned if she was going to run away here and now, "a crusade?"

No. Not him, he couldn't be like her. He had a family, he could be happy. She got out of bed every morning for revenge. I don't want this life for him. It is my cross to bear, not his.

Lelouch, for his part, seemed to realize that his passion had gotten the best of him. He had to resist the urge to curse himself for what he had said. He had gotten lost in the fact that he had so much in common with Kallen drive him to say what his own quest for identity had given him as the means of expression. Instead, it was obvious by Kallen's expression that he was coming off like a nutter.

"No," he replied, trying to find the right words to reach out to her, because that was what he was now trying to do, as stupid and as foolish as this spur of the moment wish was, he wanted to bridge that gap between them to avoid what he knew was going to end badly if someone didn't take that first step, "no, I'm sorry Kallen, that came out poorly," he added with a scowl meant for himself.

"Then what did you mean?"

Taking a deep cleansing breath to fight off the irritation with Kallen's tone, he spoke, choosing his words carefully in a way that might elicit Kallen to open herself up, "I think I should show you this first," he then reached up to his right arm, pulling up the sleeve to show his bicep and the ornate black king piece that was etched into the skin there. Letting her drink it in for a few moments, he then pulled the sleeve back down.

"When I confronted the Emperor after my mother was assassinated, I demanded that he take action to find her killers, to find those that had wronged both Nunnally and I. Instead, he did nothing, and when I pressed him, he disowned me," he let that hang in the air for a few moments, letting Kallen take that in before he continued, "He said that I was dead to him and that he would be sending both Nunnally and I to Japan to be political pawns. You know what I did? I refused, I told him that I would rather die a king in my own right than a pawn in his game. I didn't realize it then, but I had changed everything, it wasn't just that he restored my rights and made me into what I am today, it was the fact that I stood on my own two feet and I chose to say no."

Taking a drink to wet his suddenly parched throat, he then placed it down.

"There is one thing in this world that makes us human, it's not the fact that we can build such magnificent things or create works of art that can take a person's breath away, it is the fact that we have the power to choose. It is the single, most powerful aspect of who we are and is what drives the human race to such grand heights. The ability to choose what to be, to choose what to do, is something that all people should have, yet almost half the world does not have that ability because of Britannia. We, as a nation, have stripped away that ability for millions, turning them into something less than human. It is a crime that no human being should inflict upon others, yet here is an Emperor that not only does it, but he continues to perpetuate it in the foolish pursuit of placing the entire world under his rule."

"I can't support this, I won't support this. It was choice that led me to where I am, and it is choice that guides my principles, fueling what I do both for my men and in my administration. If I can offer just that, the choice and the possibility that lies within everyone, then maybe I can lead it to a better world. That is why I stand against the Empire's policies, because it is wrong. It has always been wrong."

It was impossible not be enraptured by what she was seeing and hearing, there was a stark difference between political posturing and straight idealism, and she had seen Lelouch toe that line before, but this was the first time he had spoken so unequivocally against the Emperor himself.

"It took my mother dying to actually choose to take a stand, Kallen. Azrael isn't simply about death, he's about the healing properties of death, about how death can lead to the rebirth of something new and better. But more importantly, he represents that which matters to me most, choice. Azrael is the choice to be something that you could never have been before born from the ashes of what you were. Even if I had gone to Japan, I know, at my very core, that eventually, I would be fighting against the Emperor, I'm only glad of the fact that because I chose to stand, I am surrounded by people who both love and believe in me. Something I would never have had if I had taken that path. There is a poem, something that I always keep on me, Kallen, it's by a gentleman by the name of Henley, but it's something that has always stayed with me throughout these years: It matters not how strait the gate, How charged the punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul. I decide my own course in life, and it leads to me on that throne, changing everything."

And there it was, as much as Kallen had willed that Lelouch would not speak those words, they were now thrown right in her face like a gauntlet. Everything that she was fighting for was right in front of her was the same as Lelouch's, albeit her's were more personal than altruistic, but they were the same nonetheless. And she couldn't deny any of it.

"Still," Lelouch finally said, adding only further to her internal debate raging on, "I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel the allure of revenge. It is one of the most intoxicating thoughts I have, the idea of destroying everything my father has built and making him watch every, single, moment of it as I turn it to ash. But, it remains just that, a fantasy, because I know that if I let my thirst for vengeance corrupt me, then I will destroy everything I am in the process."

He's exactly like me, she realized, finally admitting to what was in front of her. It wasn't a matter of words, she could see that he had taken off the mask and shown he what truly laid beneath. It was like looking in the mirror, a juxtaposition of being so broken inside yet so defined by raw purpose that it has created a union that could only end in one of two ways, either achieving what they intend or die trying.

It was that moment, that Kallen realized that this, in spite of every part of her screaming to keep what was hers secret and safe for only herself, was quite possibly the only chance she could bridge that gap between them and prevent a nearly preordained ending with one of them killing the other or the type of tragedy in which they both die in the pursuit of their ideals. The only thing holding her back right now was her. She had to make a choice.

"Lelouch," she finally spoke, making up her mind, regardless of the chances, her hand sliding to her small purse, "I want to tell you something: I'm-"

And then everything changed.


And shit is about to hit the proverbial fan, so to speak. Anyways, I'm leaving it there for good reason so you can see the next chapter, which I'm going to say is going to be somewhat explosive.

Now, with that aside, there are two things I want to finish with. The first, is a story recommendation, something I haven't done since Phoenix, which is arguably a very good story. But that is not the story that I'm going to talk about, I'm actually going to mention Cold Calculus by Z98. The reason I am pointing this out is because of my love of different interpretations and how large of an effect a change can make in an overall story. Cold Calculus is this in spades, where it makes Euphie, someone who I am not exactly the largest fan of, into someone I could readily get behind. So please, go over and take a crack at it, and if you have already, good for you.

Next, is an omake from my beta, ajpa.

"Lelouch," she finally spoke, making up her mind, regardless of the chances, her hand sliding to her small purse, "I want to tell you something. I...I...I'm pregnant."

And then everything changed.

I thought it amusing to be in the least after arguing with him over how it doesn't exactly make sense since they haven't exactly done it. But hey, somewhat amusing whe you sit down and think about it.

Well, that's it. Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter. Be sure to leave a review people, I'd like to see your thoughts on this chapter and everything else. I'll try and update sooner than nearly 3 months this time.