A/N: I'm baaaack! I cannot apologize enough for the LONG time between updates. I could go on and on about what's been going on, but I am just going to leave it with life got in the way of my writing. Hopefully everything is back on an even keel and I can get back to writing regularly, because words cannot describe how much I have missed it!
Thank you so much to everyone who reads, follows, private messages, favorites, and reviews this story. You honestly have no idea how much it means to me.
I have to give a HUGE shout out to my fanfiction bestie forever ABEDFAN. Without him, I guarantee this wouldn't have even been written tonight. (I would probably still be on The Birthweek Song episode if I didn't have him to bounce ideas off of and nag me about updating.) PLEASE, PLEASE check out his two stories- Before She Ruined It All and All Laughter Was Lost. They are amazing!
It's been so long, so if I forget to give anyone who reviewed since the last update, I apologize in advance. Thanks for reviewing:
-ABEDFAN
-TheWhiteCrayon
-rosaandrews
-Alexander Old
-unicorn of fire
-guest
-FireAndFury796
-guest
-GothicRay
-laurenscissorhandss
-jadecrazymusiclover
-WritingWithLibby
-guest
-NoItsBecky
Enjoy?
Wifi in the Sky
Part One
"So….do you feel any different?" Cat asks me.
"Do I look any different to you?" I turn around and spread my arms out, twirling around once. After a beat she shakes her head somewhat cautiously. "What did you think?" I ask, turning back to the mirror and applying the rest of my eyeliner. "That I would have some sort of 'no longer a virgin' sign magically appear on my forehead?"
"It's just….you do look a little different," Cat says. I slam my makeup down onto my vanity and narrow my eyes at her, refusing to turn around again and instead glare at her reflection in the mirror.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I snap at her, barely registering that I just used Cat's own signature phrase against her.
"It's just…..your eyes. They look different. You know how in movies and tv and things, they always talk about how people look older after they have sex? Like they know more about the world or whatever?" Cat says and then pauses.
"Ugh….please don't say I look all wise and worldly now. We both know I was those things already," I roll my eyes and walk over to grab my backpack.
"I wasn't going to."
"Oh, um….so what the hell is your point then?"
"I was going to say your eyes look unsure, almost like they are scared," Cat says quietly, and her words shock me so much I am at a loss for words for a minute.
"I don't know what you mean," I dismiss her with a wave of my hand. "Come on, we are going to be late," I walk quickly to my bedroom door.
"Why do you regret having sex with Beck?" Cat asks me, and turn to look at my best friend. "I thought you love him?"
"I do love him. And I don't regret it. At all. Not even a little," I try to voice the self doubt that has been plaguing me the past two days. "It's just now, I don't know if things are going to change. Between us. I mean, Beck's seen me naked a million times. I don't know why I feel weird seeing him now. I blew him off this entire weekend. I just couldn't face him. And I don't even know why," I bite my lip in frustration. "It's so fucking stupid," I say, sinking down onto the edge of my bed.
"You're doing it again," Cat says, sitting next to me on the bed.
"Doing what?"
"Exactly what you did after the first time you and Beck kissed," Cat says. "Don't you remember? You started freaking out after that, and refused to even look at him for two weeks!"
"Well, to be fair, right after we kissed I realized that the girl I had just pushed into the pool with her clothes on like ten minutes earlier was his freaking girlfriend."
"Yeah- the girlfriend he turned around and broke up with two minutes after you guys kissed," Cat points out, poking me in the side with her fingers.
"He still had a fucking girlfriend and kissed me," I say, crossing my arms.
"I don't think you are allowed to be mad at him anymore for that," Cat says. "Seriously- two minutes later!"
"Your point?" I ask, shoving her hands away from my side.
"The point is- you avoided any kind of contact with Beck after that because you were scared. Scared that you could like him. Scared to let him see the real you," Cat says seriously, then pauses for a minute. "Don't let your fear of getting hurt push him away from you Jadey," Cat says, laying her head on my shoulder. "You would hate yourself forever if you let your fear win."
I sigh and mentally kick myself for forgetting that Cat has almost always been able to see past my defenses. She seems to live in her own little bubble of reality so much of the time that I sometimes I forget that her little Happy Catland Universe is just as much a coping mechanism for her as my guarded and distant attitude towards people is for me. I sigh and stand up. "Thank you for that."
"It's what I'm here for," Cat smiles and jumps up. "Keeping you in check."
"I'm used to it being the other way around," I say honestly.
"It usually is," Cat agrees happily and starts to walk toward the door, and then suddenly stops abruptly and the smile falls off her face. "Don't ever be scared to let Beck see the real you. Just imagine what would have happened if you never talked to him again after that first kiss. Everything would be so different. YOU would be so different."
"I guess it's a good thing that Beck and I ended up getting accidentally locked into the damn costume shop together for an hour a couple years ago then, huh?" I faintly smile at the memory.
"Hehe, yeah. 'Accidentally,'" Cat giggles, using air quotes.
I stop smiling and reminiscing about the past as Cat's words sink in and narrow my eyes at her. "And just what the fuck is that supposed to mean?"
"Oh nothing much," Cat smiles and bounces past me, opens my bedroom door and steps out into the hallway. "Only that Andre, Robbie, and I are the ones who blocked the door so you couldn't get out of the costume shop," Cat says over her shoulder to me, bursting into giggles as she watches my mouth drop open in shock. "You both were so miserable, and obviously liked each other. We had to do something to get you two together!"
"You guys did what?" I screech, and follow a hysterically laughing Cat out into the hallway. She just turns, shrugs her shoulders, and winks at me, as she bounces down my stairs. "So my life is a lie!" I call after her and I hear her laugh even harder as she opens my front door. "Son of a bitch..." I mutter to myself as I trail after her.
A/N: I hope this didn't disappoint anyone. PLEASE, PLEASE let me know what you think.
