Chapter 4: Into Darkness

Now I've decided on a plan of action for tomorrow, it's time to while away the hours until the morning announcement. Once I've found my way back to my bed, I set the candle down on the table and light it, taking great care not to knock it over and cause an inferno. Time to get reading.

It shouldn't really surprise me that Rin's chosen text for this evening's book club is based in some sort of mental unit run by an uptight megalomaniac. However, unlike the last book we were assigned, all hope is not lost, as the inmates eventually prevail over their cruel mistress and escape the confines of the asylum having endured years of mental torture and shock therapy. That's strange. I thought Rin had given up on the idea of leaving the confines of Cresthaven Hospital. Does she know something the rest of us don't? Maybe she's gonna have Eizou pick up the skip and try to smash a window with it. Good luck breaking through plate steel with that, though.

Is the interpretation we're supposed to make as simple as our hope being enough to overcome the despair of this hospital? Perhaps not. The alternative is that Rin is warning us not to do anything stupid, to be less like McMurphy and more like Chief Broom. Keep quiet, don't kick up a fuss, don't try to be the big damn hero. Now that makes a lot more sense. If none of us challenge the authority figure in this place, the sequence of events that could eventually enable our escape will never happen. Hope is dangerous, and dreaming of the outside will only lead to our destruction. That's what Rin is trying to tell us. If that's the case though, I'd rather take my chances with Monokuma. I've got nothing to lose at this point. That's why when morning comes-

Ding dong, ding dong!

Well, that was some fucking good timing. The lights flicker back to life along with the monitors as Monokuma delivers his tired old morning speech. I'm not even listening as I'm too busy rushing into the bathroom. I take a nice, long, hot shower for once. So refreshing, so luxuriating. I haven't felt this good since… before Hikari died. Wow, way to kill my own mood. At times like this, whenever I think about that, I should stop letting it get me down. Instead, I should smile. She wouldn't want me to dwell on the past. She'd want me to always look toward the future and find a way to bust everyone out of this place. If Rin thinks it's time for us all to give up, she's wrong. We can, and will, prevail.

I step out of the shower, keeping it running on full power, and turn on the taps as I dry myself off. Today's all about pushing the boundaries, to see what it takes to activate Monokuma's motive. Once we've established how much pressure we can put on the system before everything goes down, we can try to set up a plan around it. The only problem is, where do we even begin? Have we missed anything? I guess this is why our escape plan has to be a collaborative project. I can't possibly come up with everything myself. I've been beside myself with grief the past couple of days, but no longer. Hikari, I may miss you with all my heart, but I'm living for the future now.

That must've been a really long shower, because the e-Handbook shows that everyone else has beaten me to the cafeteria. Without a moment's hesitation, I get dressed and race to join the others. The masses have gathered around the large table we always reserve for important meetings, so I hurriedly grab something off the shelf and sit down. In between Haruki and Nanima.

"Morning everyone," I say, looking between the two. Neither of them seem to particularly care that I'm separating them. I look across Haruki's shoulder and to my horror, Alicia is in the seat next to him, her bow and a quiver of arrows hanging over the back of her chair. I thought I'd got through to him, but I guess it just isn't that easy to break away, especially if you think you're going to have to live in the same confined space as them for the rest of your life.

"May the glory of Xandyth be with you!" Zygoth says, forming a zig-zag shape with his arms.

"What took you so long?" Rin asks. "You couldn't possibly have overslept."

"She's right," says Nayumi, looking unusually alert. "Even I didn't oversleep this morning…"

"I wish I had," Daisuke says, yawning. He looks pretty rough, but it's a relief to see him back to normal. "Alas, Monokuma's ghastly announcement roused me from a state of torpor."

"Have I missed anything?" I ask before taking a bite from the ungodly shrink-wrapped abomination I plucked off the shelf. I've got no idea what Monokuma adds to these things but I'm sure it's gonna kill me one of these days.

"Nothing much," Alicia says. "Just the introduction of a new rule segregating the student body by gender, effective as of right now! Chop, chop, get a move on!" She stands up and claps, causing Haruki to flinch before instinctively leaping from his seat and running away.

"I don't remember us agreeing to that," Haru says. "Then again, are you really gonna trust me?" I stay defiantly seated, folding my arms and staring coldly at Alicia as she stands before me. I should be scared, but I know she wouldn't dare try to harm me in full view of the others. She'll wait until I'm alone first, then I'll feel a horrible piercing pain somewhere just below my kidney as an arrow pierces my back...

"Well, at least you were smart enough to figure out it was a joke, Shinji," she says. "Everyone else was merely too lazy to move, I suspect."

"Um, I kind of can't move that fast," Haru objects.

"The Council of Slartibartfast decrees- wait, what were we talking about again?" Zygoth asks, shaking his head as though snapping out of a trance.

"I dunno," Eizou replies, having finally polished off a massive plate of food. How the hell does he eat so much? Maybe he thinks this is the last chance he'll get to pig out before he's back out on the open sea with nothing to live off but fish and seagulls. A little optimistic perhaps, but hopefully not too far from the truth.

"Okay, was anybody listening prior to Shinji's arrival?" Rin asks, dragging us back on topic.

"Yeah, I think I was," Nanima says. "You wanted to talk about the book club you're holding later, right?" The book club, eh? I have to wonder if anyone's actually read the set text apart from me. Going off the previous trial and how few people seemed to spot the obvious references, it seems like most people just aren't willing to engage. Gotta wonder how the hell these people were planning on making it through Hope's Peak. Procrastination never gets you anywhere.

"That is correct," Rin says, nodding. "I am pleased that everyone appears to be so enthusiastic. Providing that Shinji has done as I predicted and spent the night reading Kesey's magnum opus multiple times, we should all be prepared for a wonderful evening of discussion and debate on the key themes and elements of One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest."

"Why wait until evening?" I ask. "If everyone's done the reading, then we can start whenever we want. The inmates are free to leave the institution at any time they like, after all." Does that even make any sense? After I've said it, I'm not so sure, but I think it gets the point across.

"Very well, then," Rin says. "If someone would be so kind as to drag Haruki back here, you all have five minutes to grab your copies and go directly to our arranged meeting point. I expect everyone to have fully annotated their copies..." Clearly, I didn't get that point across.

"No," I say, bringing proceedings to a halt and creating an awkward atmosphere as everyone has already half-risen from their seats, caught in purgatory, unable to decide if they should commit to standing up or sit back down. "I think we should do it later. At least let everyone digest their breakfasts first." Speaking of which, half of mine is still in front of me, so I take a bite.

"Do not try my patience at this early hour, Shinji," Daisuke says. "Explicate your repudiation of Rin's arrangements at once." Somebody's grumpy this morning. Is the coffee machine working properly? I suppose I ought to check that myself. I gulp down the mouthful of greasy, meaty stuff I'm eating and clear my throat. Time to make up an excuse to manipulate this event in my favour. I'm not letting another opportunity like this slip through my fingers.

"Okay. I should've made myself clearer. I don't mean we should start now. What I mean is we should set the right mood, have the right atmosphere. Last night, I was reading by candle-light, and after my third read-through, I came to the realisation that the atmosphere was just perfect. My proposal is that, instead of a set time, we should all head to the library after the lights go out. Light some candles, and we can all sit around in the dark and talk, without worrying about Monokuma."

"I like the sound of that," Nayumi says. "It sounds like a novel approach." Really, Nayumi? You're doing puns now?

"Might be a bit of a fire hazard though," Haru warns. "Especially with me around. I could easily knock something over if I can't see where I'm going."

"But that's what the candles are for," Eizou says. "They'd be lighting the way so you'd have nothing to worry about, right?"

"I guess that's true, but whoever sets all that up is gonna have to make sure there's nothing my chair can get caught on," Haru says.

"Worry not," says Rin. "Fire safety will be my utmost priority. Although, I do have my misgivings about this plan, especially considering…"

"How do you do, fellow kids?" Monokuma appears in Haruki's empty seat, wearing a red baseball cap turned backwards, holding a skateboard over his right shoulder and a book in his left paw.

"You know what? This is an improvement," Alicia says, relatively unperturbed by the bear taking a seat next to her.

"Wh-why is he here?" Nanima asks. "What's he gonna make us do?"

"Was the first motive not enough?" asks Haru. "You got some other mind-blowing revelation to share with us?"

"We'll soon see about that, but that's not the reason I'm here right now," Monokuma says. "Lemme tell ya, I was just stoked when Rin here invited me to the book club yesterday! Why, I haven't been able to put this book down since! And not just because I accidentally glued it to my paw. It's a real page-turner!" I turn and stare at Rin in disbelief.

"…You invited Monokuma to the book club?" What the fuck is she thinking?

"Why of course," Rin says, that tiny momentary smile flickering across her lips. "If we are to remain in this school for the rest of our lives, which we will, should we not make efforts to entertain our host?"

"I think we're providing him enough entertainment by continuing to stay here as his captives," I reply. "Don't forget that, Rin. He kidnapped us and forced us to play this sick game!"

"Forced, you say?" Monokuma enquires. "I never forced you guys to start killin'! You all did that your merry selves! And, I imagine, will again very soon! Puhuhuhu!"

"Begone from our table, fiend!" Zygoth commands, tossing a packet of salt across the table at Monokuma, who remains unfazed.

"Oh, I'm sorry, was I supposed to react?" Monokuma asks, before half-heartedly wriggling and writhing his way beneath the table. "Oh, Gods, I must be melting again," he says flatly. "Hope I can fix this before the book club…" No need to worry about that, you bastard. I'm uninviting you.

"You're not serious, are you?" I ask of Rin. "You really want him there? After everything he's done to us?"

"Why do you insist on meddling in affairs that are none of your concern?" she retorts. "Who I invite to my own event is my business alone. If you don't like that, you're perfectly free to abstain." Why is she being so stubborn about this? I'm trying to create the perfect environment to stop him from hearing us forming an escape plan and Rin is insisting on ruining that. I ought to just come right out and say it.

"Look, I couldn't give less of a fuck about the book club," I say. "We need to knock off the power as soon as possible. That's our ticket out of this place!"

"I see," Rin says. "So, you were willing to sabotage my event and use the cover of darkness to walk free of our confines? How naïve of you, to think such a thing is possible."

"I know it's not gonna just be as easy as that," I say, slamming the table in exasperation. "But if it's pitch black and all the power's off, what can Monokuma do to stop us? That's our best chance. That's why I want every single one of you to run every appliance possible, leave your taps on all day, turn on all the showers in the gym. Waste as much energy as you can. We'll show Monokuma we don't need all that shit!"

"Wuzzat? My ears are burning!" Monokuma's back in Haruki's old seat, still in that ridiculous 'hip' get-up from before. "My, my! Shinji Yoshida, the Ultimate Failure, is actually engaging with my motive? Sounds like someone's planning something! So, what's it gonna be? Stabbing? Slashing? Drowning? Strangulation? Ooooh, maybe it'll be poison, seeing how you're the one with the key to the medicine room! Either way, I can't wait to see what you're cookin' up! Puhuhuhuhu! Time to avenge your lost Lenore, and quoth the raven 'Nevermore!'" I should have known just mentioning his name was enough to summon him and his aura of fear and suspicion. It hangs like a cloud around this place, and it feels like it will never disperse.

"He wouldn't do that," Eizou says.

"Indeed," Alicia concurs. "Someone as scrawny and weak as Shinji could never kill anyone."

"I wouldn't underestimate him if I were you," Monokuma says. "Underneath that scrawny exterior beats the heart of a born killer! Just look into his eyes and tell me he's not pure eeeeeeeeevil!" After this remark, Monokuma lays his skateboard on the table, hops on, kicks off and whooshes away out of sight. "Cowabunga, duuuuuuuuudes!"

"Is that his idea of being cool?" Eizou asks. "Because that's totally lame."

"I haven't seen anything that strange since I visited Omicron Persei Eight," Zygoth says. So, being locked up in this hospital and forced to kill other students, that's all fair game, but a skateboarding teddy is what it takes to blow your socks off? Better not show this guy Teletubbies or he'll probably legitimately have an aneurysm trying to process it.

"So, Rin, are we gonna do this or not? You seemed fine with my ideas earlier, aside from that one reservation. Is it really so crucial for him to be there?" I ask. I don't know how much time I'm going to have to come up with an actual plan to convince her this was all worth it, but this is meant to be a brainstorming session, after all. We don't need to have anything concrete immediately.

"I planned this event as a book club first and foremost, and that is how it shall remain," Rin replies. "However, should we have time afterwards, I will allow for some unrelated discussion, including your escape plan, if you so desire. Does that sound fair?" Rin drives a hard bargain, but I'm gonna have to take this. However, in doing so, I commit to something I've been dreading for a while.

"I'll take it," I say. I'm not exactly thrilled with the way this has panned out, but oh well.

"You know what'd burn through our energy supplies really fast?" Nanima asks. She looks pleased with herself, like she has a plan of her own to combat the despair. "Playing those arcade machines in the rec room all day! Who's with me?"

"Sounds fun, but I probably wouldn't be able to reach the controls," Haru says. "They don't exactly make arcade cabinets for people like me. Unless they've got one of those table-top Space Invader machines or something."

"Don't think they have any of those, but you can always come and watch if you want!" Nanima says, hoping to lift the pessimist's spirits.

"Think I might pass on that one," Haru says. "Oughta work on regaining my upper body strength if I'm gonna do things myself."

"What a coincidence," Alicia says, "I was just about to head up to the gym for a quick workout myself. We might as well go up together."

"Guess it couldn't hurt," Haru says, smiling for once. Alicia tries to move toward him, presumably to help him, but he waves her away, insisting he's got this. With some difficulty, he manages to manoeuvre his way out from behind the table and wheel himself around the other side.

"I think you'll find those so called 'space invaders' are actually part of a peaceful convoy of missionaries from the third moon of Xandyth, seeking to enlighten the universe!" Zygoth declares, running out of the cafeteria after Haru. I look back toward Nanima and both of us have the same reaction, shaking our heads and shrugging. Neither of us have any idea what his game is.

"I have no time for such pointless endeavours," Daisuke says, arising from his seat. "If anybody needs me, I shall be in my quarters. Worry not, for I have already committed the entirety of Kesey's oeuvre to my memory. Not that there's much to memorise." Well, that's one person who won't be coming to the rec room.

"Anybody else?" I ask, looking around and seeing blank stares and bemused faces all around.

"Think you're on your own there, to be honest," Eizou says, picking up his plate and walking off. You lot really aren't doing me any favours, you know. I'm trying to do what's right and everyone seems to just be ignoring me. Well, except Nanima. And Haruki. He's been gone a while and that's kind of worrying. I ought to find him and make sure he's not doing anything stupid. Or hasn't done something stupid.

"I'll meet you up there," I tell Nanima, standing and turning to make my way out of the cafeteria. "Gonna go fetch Haruki, see if he's interested."

"Alrighty," Nanima says. "I'll be sure to put everything on charge too, just like you said! Hell yeah, this is gonna be great!" No, it's not. Maybe for you, it will, because you'll absolutely destroy me at every game we try. I fire up the e-Handbook and discover that Haruki has stowed himself away in the least convenient place imaginable, the art room. That's awfully suspicious. I can't afford to waste time waiting for the lift, so I leg it up the stairs, not knowing what I'm about to walk in on. Three flights of stairs later, I need a rest, but I can't stop. I stand outside the room, knocking on the door, hoping for a chirpy answer, but there isn't one.

"Haruki? I know you're in there." Please, let him be okay. I close my eyes while opening the door, and immediately, I smell blood. It's a smell I really shouldn't be familiar with, but after Hikari's death, I instantly recognise it. Immediately, I slam the door shut. I turn my back on the door, looking down and my hands and seeing them shaking. There's no blood on them, at least. What should I do? Should I tell the others? Do I even have time to do that? There's a chance he's still alive in there, and if that's the case, I need to be decisive. No more fear. I grip the handle once more, feeling my expression twisting into one of determination, perhaps a little aggression too. I open the door again, and there he is…

Sitting in the middle of the floor, smearing his bloody hand all over a canvas. All across the room, propped up on easels and hanging off the walls, are dreadful images and incomprehensible shapes, all painted in his blood. This won't do at all.

"Haruki, what's the meaning of all this?" I ask. I swear, leave him alone for one second and he becomes Jackson bloody Pollock, with emphasis on 'bloody'. "…You didn't break up with Alicia, did you?" Given they were still sat next to each other at breakfast despite there being many open seats available, I could be completely wrong, but this really strikes me as the kind of thing someone who's just been through a horrific break-up would do.

"Break up?" he retorts, not even looking at me, simply staring at an ugly face he drew with his own blood. "No. That's not what happened. After all… how do you destroy that which never existed in the first place?" He actually gets it now. Time to pull him out of this messy depression before he bleeds out and dies on us.

"You finally understand," I say. "She never had any feelings for you. She was using you this whole time. To her, you were just an errand boy and a punching bag. I know how hard it can be, having to move on, having to pick up all the pieces and get yourself back together. Hell, I'm still going through that right now. This, though, this isn't healthy. This isn't how you should be coping, by locking yourself away and causing yourself harm. Come and join us in the arcade room. Well, once your hand's been fixed up. Again."

"Yeah… I shouldn't have done that," Haruki admits, rubbing the back of his neck with his bloodied hand. "Just, when Alicia clapped at me this morning, I panicked. I needed to get away, go somewhere quiet, like, so I came up here…"

"Would've thought the garden might have a more calming effect than this room," I suggest, hoping that in future he doesn't express his creative side in such a self-destructive manner.

"Yeah, I guess that would've made more sense, but I wasn't thinking straight. So here I was, thinking maybe I could just do some watercolours or something, when Monokuma appeared, dressed like an idiot. He said 'You don't need to worry about telling Alicia it's over, because it never existed in the first place!'" He didn't even confront her. This is what the Ultimate Singer, a guy once renowned for his unflappable stage presence, has been reduced to. His ridiculous infatuation has led to him being metaphorically castrated by the Ultimate Cold-Hearted Bitch. We can't have this continue any longer.

"So that led you to self-harm and start painting with your own blood?" I ask.

"Yeah," Haruki says, nodding slowly, a tear dripping down his cheek. He reaches for a pair of scissors, coated in blood, and holds it up for me to see. "Yeah… I just… saw this pair of scissors and thought 'you know what, why not?' The only thing that's real in this world is pain, anger, fear, frustration…" Stick to watercolours next time.

"You can't go on like this, Haruki," I tell him forcefully. "If there's a chance of you having to spend the rest of your life in here, why spend those remaining days wallowing and letting fear and pain control you? When we first got here, you were the one telling me to keep my chin up, reach for the stars, never lose sight of my goals. What happened to all that, eh?"

"Alicia happened." Sounds about right. "You've got a point, though. I need to sort myself out. Guess can start by getting this hand of mine sewn up. Again."

"Careful you don't make a mess," I say. "Wrap it up in something. At least don't trail blood all over the place. People will think someone's been killed again." While Haruki rummages around looking for something to stop the bleeding, I look up Nayumi's location in the e-handbook, quickly discovering she's in the rec room with Nanima. Looks like she managed to convince someone to join us after all.

"Right, come on, let's go," Haruki says, wrapping his scarf around his hand. "Being in here isn't doing me any favours." We leave the art room, run down the stairs to the floor immediately below us, flinging open the door to the rec room to find Nayumi sleeping while Nanima is hunched over an ancient arcade machine. As the door swings open, she momentarily peels her eyes away from the screen and flashes me a huge smile.

"You finally made it," Nanima says, overjoyed. "Come on, I'll show you how to get a perfect score in Galaga!" Sure, whatever, as long as I don't have to play.

"Well, uh, Haruki kind of needs some medical attention first," I say as the singer stands awkwardly beside me, staring at Nayumi curled up on the sofa.

"Oh no, really? What happened?" Nanima asks, rushing over in concern.

"It's nothing," Haruki says, waving her away with his unsullied hand. "I just cut my hand, that's all. Looks worse than it actually is."

"We need Nayumi to sew it up. Again." Leaving the two of them together in the hope that concern might blossom into something else, I sit myself down next to Nayumi and lightly shake her awake.

"Hmmmmm... what's happening?" she asks sleepily. "I was having such a nice dream…"

"Haruki managed to burst his stitches," I say, withholding some of the truth for his sake.

"Okay, I'll get right on it," she says, yawning and stretching before shuffling over to Haruki and escorting him out of the rec room. Guess it's just the two of us. Again. Nanima resumes her position over the controls of the Galaga machine as I pull up a chair and watch, entranced as Nanima skilfully guns down every formation of enemy ships almost as soon as they appear on screen. It's clear she's done this a hundred times before. I wouldn't even know where to start shooting.

"You know how I got good at this? Playing Tekken on the Playstation a whole bunch," she says. "The way to unlock Devil Kazuya was by getting a perfect score on the little Galaga game at the start. Before I started streaming, I was a real completionist. I wouldn't be satisfied until I'd seen everything a game had to offer, and I knew I just had to unlock that skin. Nowadays, you could just buy it for a few hundred yen instead of needing to hone your skills or press a particular combination of buttons..." The way she can just casually dispense trivia and still beat this old game flawlessly really showcases her talent. This is her in her absolute element. A pity she only ever seems to show this side of herself around me. I'm curious about her and Haruki and why the two of them seemingly didn't interact at all this morning, but I don't want to take her out of her zone right now. Instead, I sit and watch, letting Nanima walk me through a bunch of arcade classics.

Halfway through her perfect demonstration of Pac-Man, I start feeling hungry again, and just as I'm about to excuse myself to get something else to eat, the room goes pitch-black and the incessant wakka-wakkas die out instantly. The time is finally upon us to plan our great escape.


A.N.: Hello again, my beautiful people! Turns out postgrad is really bloody difficult so I've been kinda snowed under lately, but I still managed to get this out. Not only that, I've started preparing for my next project once this is finished. The next one will have a cast composed entirely of my own characters and hopefully people will really enjoy it.