Chapter 55

Wednesday afternoon House sat in his office with his head back and his face turned toward the ceiling. He didn't have a case; the hospital was going nuts with shamrocks, and leprechaun and people talking about drinking green beer and asking him where his green was… the last person to do so got a good look at the shamrock boxers Cuddy had got him. In short House was hiding from the madness that was St. Patrick's Day. He had the blinds drawn, his eyes closed and his feet propped up in the desk when out of nowhere the phone rang. "Shit" he grumbled. "House"

"Gregory!"

"Hey mom"

"I just got your thank you card! Ohh Greg, I'm so happy!"

House racked his brain for a moment… happy about what?... ohhhhh… "Yeah, thought you would be"

"Twins! Oh Greg, this is wonderful! Crazy, but wonderful"

"Tell me about it mom"

"Ohh I can't wait to show Rick, he went out for a walk this morning, he should be back any minute now, ohh I'm just so excited! How far along is she?"

"That scan you have was taken at the end of thirteen weeks, she's in her 14th week now, we just wanted to wait until she was in the second trimester to tell anyone"

"I understand dear, I'm just… oh Greg, I'm really going to be a grandmother, I mean.. ohh…"

"Mom, mom, it's cool I got it, I understand…"

"How are you doing with all of this?"

"I'm… not… I mean, I'm not sure… anxious might be a good word"

"You will be, that's normal, even for you"

House was quiet, normal… normal's not normal… he grinned to himself "Thanks mom"

"When will you know what they are?"

"Well we should be able to tell in a few weeks if the little buggers will show us what they got on the ultrasound"

"You'll have to call me as soon as you know"

"Oh and tell Rick that he can stop pretending he doesn't know anything around you"

She was quiet for just a moment "Ohh that rat, that dirty, filthy rat! How long has he known?"

"A while…" House stopped, she was so happy, but he just had to say something "Mom…" his tone was serious.

"What is it Greg?"

"We're looking at a high risk pregnancy here, I just don't want you getting too excited. Lisa does have a history of miscarriage, but the fact that she's made it this far is very good news, it's the farthest she's ever made it, and everything is good so far…"

"Greg…" she cut him off.

"Yeah"

"I know she's in good hands, you'll take care of her"

"Thanks" House felt his chest contract.

"So you're really coming for Easter?"

"That's the plan, Lisa wants to meet Tweedledee and Tweedledum, so I guess we'll be there."

"You and Lisa can have the guest room"

"Did Rick tell you my stipulations for coming?"

"You really thought I wasn't going to make your favorite treats anyway? I love you, but sometimes you can be so damn dense"

"Love you too mom"

"Is Lisa showing yet?"

"Just starting really, people are starting to talk around here, but most of them don't see it yet though."

"Well that's to be expected, I was just thinking since she's so tiny and she's carrying twins that maybe she would be showing more"

"Just you wait, by the time we get to your place I bet she'll look like she's 6 months along instead of only 4"

"Have you told Lily yet?"

"No, not yet, but soon I'm sure"

"How do you think she'll handle it?"

"That's Lisa's department"

"I'm sure Lisa knows best in this case"

"Gee thanks"

"You know what I meant Greg, your job is getting Lisa through this pregnancy and taking care of those girls. I can't think of a better man to do it."

House ended the phone call soon after and sat back in his chair once more, his mother's words still rolling around in his head. Having faith in one's own abilities is one thing, but the sudden realization that the people around you also have faith in you is a little disconcerting when you're not used to it; especially when their confidence in you is in an area beyond your sphere of expertise. House's ego was big enough when it came to his abilities as a doctor or a musician, but when it came to social or familial interactions… faith in Gregory House was about as foreign as a nun in a strip joint.

He huffed and made his way up to Cuddy's office. "My mother got your thank you card" he said as he burst into her office. The nurse Cuddy was talking to looked up.

"Do you need something Dr. House?"

"It can wait" He plopped down on the couch stretching out and lacing his fingers behind his head.

Cuddy turned her attention back to the nurse "Well then" she huffed "Thank you for bringing this to my attention Tara, I will make sure Dr. Snyder is made aware of the situation."

"Thank you Dr. Cuddy-House" She got up to leave shaking Cuddy's hand. Then she walked past House, she nodded curtly "Dr. House", House nodded lazily back waiting for her to close the door behind her.

Cuddy continued straitening up her desk ignoring House's presence for the moment. Once she had finished her task she looked up at him stretched out comfortably on her couch. "Now, what did you need Dr. House?"

"Mom's bouncing off the walls"

"Yeah, so is mine, she already wants pictures of my baby bump"

"So when do you want to tell Lily why mommy's belly is starting to get bigger? I was thinking we should at least tell her before we go to my mom's"

"I was actually thinking about this weekend"

"Fine by me"

***

Lily sat on the couch in between her parents; she was still a little sniffley, but otherwise fine. Rachel was busying herself walking back and forth between the couch and the coffee table, occasionally she would plop down on the floor and play with the toys Cuddy had laid out for her. The movie credits started to roll and House reached for the remote turning off the TV and DVD player, they had just finished watching 'The Princess and the Frog'. He sat back and caught Cuddy's eye. It was time.

Lily was extremely excited by the movie; Cuddy listened to her ramble on about her favorite scenes before she gently interrupted her. "Lily honey," Cuddy started "Daddy and I have something important we need to tell you"

Lily looked from one to the other as though to prove that they had her attention "Ok"

"Remember when I talked to you about your birth mommy?"

"You said that Rachel and me both have different birth mommies, but you and daddy became our mommy and daddy after my mommy and Rachel's mommy when to heaven"

House bit his cheek to keep a straight face.

"That's right, well now I am going to be a birth mommy too"

"You are?"

Cuddy nodded.

"So you're going to have a baby? Where is it?" she looked at Cuddy's belly.

Cuddy put her hand on her lower abdomen "Actually honey Daddy and I are going to have two babies, and they are in here, they are just very small right now"

Lily looked at Cuddy's hand on her belly for a long moment "Two?... but…" here it comes… "But how did they get in there?" and there it was… the bomb had hit the floor. The question had been asked, and House was in his glory.

"Daddy put them in there" House said with a smirk as he watched Cuddy's face contort.

Lily turned her head towards him, "How can you put two babies in Mommy's tummy?" she asked incredulously.

"Magic"

"You're silly Daddy"

"No really, just ask Mommy, Mommy wasn't it 'Magic' when I put the babies in your belly?"

Cuddy's cheeks were hot, oh for heavens sake… Cuddy glared at House, and then turned to Lily, "Yes honey it was kinda like magic"

"Ohh" Lily sad as she plopped back on the couch, then she looked back up at House "Like Mama Odie in the movie Daddy?"

"Ohh something like that"

Lily seemed satisfied with that answer, "Did you have anything else you wanted to ask Lily" Cuddy prompted.

Lily thought for a moment, "I still don't get how they fit in there mommy"

"Well they are very tiny right now, but they are getting bigger every day and as they grow Mommy's belly will too"

House shifted on the couch and pulled out his wallet, "Here Lil, here's a picture of the babies and maybe tomorrow we can go back to the children's museum and you can look at the fetal development display again"

"I liked the Museum" then she looked at the picture House held out for her "They look funny" she said scrunching up her nose.

"Yeah, they will look kinda funny for a while, but by the time they are born they will look like regular babies"

"I hope you're right daddy"

"Don't worry, I am"

***

The next day the four of them went to the Children's Museum as planned. They took Lily through the exhibit showing her the different stages and explaining them to her in as much detail as her little mind could handle. They got out the ultrasound photo again and let Lily compare the babies in the display to the babies in the scan.

Cuddy nearly started crying when Lily tried to explain to Rachel that "mommy is going to have two babies" and "That means you're going to be a big sister too!". Rachel on the other hand didn't seem as moved and just clapped her hands delightfully, babbling incoherently, occasionally throwing in a few words such as "Mummy" and "Dade" just for good measure.

As it turned out the trip to the Children's museum was a great success. They even stopped by the gift shop to pick up a few children's books and some new coloring books for the girls to take with them on their trip to Grandma's house.

***

House was lying on his side watching Cuddy sleep. She was on her back and her small belly was sticking up. People at the hospital were really starting to talk about their boss's growing belly now. As predicted Cuddy's belly currently looked more like she was just a few weeks shy of six months instead of only nearing four and a half. House doubted it would be much longer before she was undeniably pregnant to even the thickest morons.

House reached a hand over to Cuddy to caress the growing bump containing his offspring. "This better be a tender moment between a father and his unborn children or else I'm out of here; I'm not in the mood Greg" Cuddy groaned.

"Well good morning to you too"

"What's so good about it? I feel like crap"

"Symptoms?"

"Sore back, nausea, hump…" Cuddy suddenly got out of bed and made a quick exit to the bathroom. When she returned she sat down on the bed "And a headache"

"Otherwise you're just pregnant"

"Yeah"

"Are you ready for this?" it was early in the morning on Good Friday. They would be leaving for his mother's soon.

"I'm usually fine after I get breakfast; it's just this first

thing in the morning shit that's really awful" she said laying back down for a moment.

House nodded. He was still torn about their travel plans. They had decided to fly down to his mother's, they could have drove but he figured that flying would be the lesser of two evils… at least it would be over quicker. That was the reason his mother always flew anyway. They could endure two cranky kids for an hour flight easier than a three and a half hour plus car ride. They would go down today and hopefully make it to Grandma's for a late lunch. Blythe had signed the kids up for the big Easter egg hunt in Arlington on Saturday morning, it wasn't the White House lawn but it was a hell of a lot easier to get into.

Cuddy sat up "Ok, we have to get moving if we're going to make our flight, I'll get the girls ready and you call Wilson; he said he would take us to the airport"

"Ohh I don't think that's going to happen"

"What did you do to him now?"

House grinned "Yesterday was April Fools day, I couldn't resist"

She groaned and closed her eyes holding back the fire she could feel building behind them, "What did you do?"

"Nothing too extravagant, I just had all of his office furniture nailed to the ceiling"

"You did what?"

"It was a rather artistic prank, I thought"

"How is it I'm just hearing about this now?"

"I waited until he was on his rounds before I had the guys come in and then I just kept him away from his office the rest of the day"

"I can't believe you"

"Oh yes you can"

Cuddy just rolled her eyes.

"And we're leaving today so there is no way he can get back at me" House smiled satisfactorily.

***

Thanks to House's prank they had taken a cab to the airport. They had just about finished all of the necessary air travel requirements and were about to move into the designated area to wait for their plain when the security guard got a call on his radio. "Sir you're going to have to come with me"

"What the hell for?"

"Suspension of Opiate Smuggling"

"What the HELL!"

"Greg! What's going on?" Cuddy sputtered, her worst fears coming true right before her eyes.

"Lisa, I swear, I'm clean, I swear!"

"Sir, please come with me" The guard took him roughly by the arm.

"I don't have any drugs in me or on me except for some damn Ibuprofen, and I even have a prescription for that"

Another guard grabbed House by the other arm taking his cane roughly, "Mr. House this way please"

"That's Dr. House to you." He looked at his arm, "I'd appreciate it if you didn't do this in front of my family, and if you haven't noticed I kind of need that to walk"

"You can do without it"

The guards walked House down a short hall nearby and opened a gray door that exposed a darkened room. The guard to House's left switched on the light to reveal a man standing there with his back to the door. Even from the back House recognized the man. He turned around slowly, "Did you really think you could get away with it that easily?"

"This is low, even for you"

"Oh I don't know…" he smirked. "Nailing my office furniture to the ceiling was pretty down there"

The guys on either side of House let go of him and started to laugh.

"House, I'd like you to meet my ex-Brother-in-law, Ryan" Wilson gestured to the guard who had stopped him "and his buddy Don".

"Thought this one looked familiar" He said tilting his head in Ryan's direction. "Now would you mind telling my wife this is all just some twisted joke before she leaves me, she already thinks I'm using again"

"No she doesn't"

"She was in on it wasn't she"

"Ohh yeah"

"That bitch"

"Happy April Fools! I may be a day late, but it was so worth it"

"Hardy-har-har, now let's go before my wife and kids head to DC without me"

"Sure thing House" Wilson chuckled.

When they got back out to where Cuddy and the girl's were standing. House was surprised to see that Lily was giggling also. He bent down to look at her "And you couldn't have told daddy about this could you?"

"Mommy told me not to, she said it would ruin Uncle Jimmy's surprise" Lily giggled.

"Ohh yeah, some surprise, thanks a lot kid"

"You're welcome Daddy" she answered with a very House like smirk.