Peter stood, tense in his own kitchen, with his back to Rebecca as he made himself coffee. Neal and the kids were still asleep, but he'd gotten up when Neal kicked him accidentally. Peter didn't even react to the kick as someone normally might. All he had to do was figure out which leg it was and let it go at that. Neal's leg still spasms at times when he sleeps and Peter wanted to help Neal very badly, but he didn't know what was out there. "If I ask to take Neal shopping with Tara, will you object?"
"Yes," Peter said firmly. "First of all, Tara isn't in town right now. She went somewhere with Declan and their baby on a vacation." He glanced at her, glaring. "I'm an FBI agent. You can't bullshit me very well." She nodded, knowing Tara wasn't in town. She wanted to spend some time alone with Neal and that was very hard to do with his watchdog guarding him at all times. "Second of all, I don't trust you around my husband. I know I pushed him to befriend you several years ago, but I haven't trusted you since the day you cornered him and begged him to have sex with you."
"I know that," she said quietly.
Peter's grip on his mug was tight. He wouldn't shatter it though. It was one of the mugs Neal had decorated for him for their first Christmas together. He treasured it as much as he treasures Neal himself. "Being a homosexual means you're attracted to members of the same sex. I'm not sure if you learned that at any point in your life, but that means Neal, as a man, is attracted to other men."
"Haven't you ever wondered how he got it up long enough to knock up Kathy?"
"Kate," Peter hissed. He didn't know the woman at all, but he respected her since she had given them Nicky. "Neal was drunk. It's like being drugged. Hell, it's comparable to being raped. You know as well as Neal does that your body reacts to sexual stimulation regardless of whether or not it's consensual." She was very flustered by the reality of that. Peter knew Neal was forced to ejaculate when he was being raped and that was one form of humiliation while he was in their clutches. Neal, under normal circumstances, would never come when he was close to Vincent or Craig. Neal's body wasn't his own when they'd used him and Peter imagined that Rebecca had gone through something similar since she had also been raped. "I got it up with my wife for several years because she knew how to stimulate me and I her. Neither of us is straight, but we still had sex."
She groaned and Peter shut his eyes tightly, trying to keep himself from strangling the woman he loathed. "So, hypothetically, if I were to give Neal a handjob or a blowjob… He'd get hard?"
Peter slammed his palm onto the countertop before spinning around to face her. He knew she was purposely pushing his buttons, but he was tired of her thinking Neal was only good for sex. Yes, he loves making love to the younger man, but Neal wasn't the kind of man who wanted sex or lovemaking twenty-four-seven. Neal, despite his beauty, wasn't a sex object in Peter's mind, but he realized that Neal was viewed that way from other perspectives. "If you go anywhere near my husband's dick, I will unleash hell upon you," he growled lowly. "He doesn't want you, Rebecca. I know he's a challenge because he can resist you, but he's taken. He's my husband and the daddy of our three children. You may feel comfortable with the idea of ripping him from me, but I'd hope you're not heartless enough to rip him from his children. There's no room for you in his personal life here at home."
Rebecca gave Peter a devious smile that made Peter's gut twist. Something was definitely amiss here, but he didn't know what her intentions with Neal were. Neal was immune to her charms. His only issue was that he was sensitive to hurting her feelings. Peter would have to force Neal to stay firm if she advanced on him because he didn't want Neal to do something he'd regret. He didn't think Neal would cheat on him regardless, but Rebecca concerned him since she was targeting Neal's weak spots.
It was one thing for Neal to endure and suffer through rape, but it was another for him to consent to sex because of guilt. Rebecca was sure to guilt Neal in some way, shape, or form, so Peter knew he had to be overly vigilant when it came to making sure his husband wasn't being toyed with. This whole situation was so bizarre. She desperately wanted Neal, so she'd finagled her way into their home and now Kramer was in town and Neal had the feeling he was interested in Peter.
He glanced towards the doorway as Neal came into view in his robe, rubbing his eyes tiredly. He was barefoot, without pants on, and his hair was a disaster. "Morning," he mumbled.
"Hey, sweetheart of mine," Peter whispered, moving towards him to pull him into a hug. He kissed Neal's hair, closing his eyes as he enveloped the warmth of his husband's body. "How'd you sleep?"
"Good until you got out of bed—jerk." Peter smiled, nuzzling the side of Neal's face. "What're you up to?"
They separated enough so that Neal could look up at Peter and Peter just grinned, loving how adorable Neal looked since he was so tired. He'd really worn Neal out last night when they made love and damn was it good. "Nothing really. I made coffee. Do you want some?" Neal nodded and Peter kissed his forehead before turning to retrieve a mug so he could pour some coffee for his husband. "Did you check your email this morning?" Neal made a sound akin to yes as Peter brought the mug to him. "That's Kramer's report on this case he's brought us. I've already stationed a few teams near the Met since that seems to be the central location for these manuscripts he's looking for."
"Have we heard anything from the other agents yet?"
Peter shook his head. "Nothing yet. Diana will let me know if we're needed, so you better at least get some casual clothes on, lover boy." Neal smirked, taking a sip of his coffee. Peter noticed how desperate Rebecca looked as she gazed at Neal longingly. What Peter found funny was that Neal wasn't even paying attention to her. Peter stared at his husband lovingly as he watched the younger man drink his coffee.
Neal sighed quietly, asking, "Do we have to go to work today?" Peter gave him a perplexed expression, wondering what was on Neal's mind. Neal hadn't been very enthusiastic about work lately, but he didn't explain why. "I just want to curl up with you and sleep all day. I mean, I know we're going to have to feed the babies and you know I love playing with them, but I'm sleepy."
The older man chuckled. "We have a little bit of time before it's a possibility that we'll be needed, baby." Neal groaned and Peter shook his head, resting his hand on his husband's hip. "You're so cute."
"Pft," Neal scoffed, rolling his eyes. "I look like I, literally, just rolled out of bed."
Briefly glancing at Rebecca to see that she was still focused on his husband, he shrugged and said, "Nah. I think you look like we made some really, really hot love in bed last night." Neal looked at his husband, eyes wide as a faint blush appeared on his cheeks. They were usually pretty civil and respectful with others around when it came to their sex life. He had the feeling he knew why Peter was making everything so blatant though, especially as Rebecca left the kitchen in a hurry.
Peter moved away from the younger man for a moment and Neal stared at him with an eyebrow raised. "Do I want to know what's going on? I mean, I'm fairly certain I know, but…" Peter was silent, knowing Neal probably didn't like the idea of speaking about their sex life with Rebecca of all people. "Babe, you know I'm yours. Since I've been with you, I haven't had sex with—" He stopped abruptly and Peter's head snapped up as he turned to face his husband, concerned with how suddenly Neal cut himself off. He knew exactly how Neal would have finished his statement and he was afraid that Neal was going to have some kind of panic attack or meltdown as he made the connection. "I haven't had consensual sex with anyone else since I met you," he whispered, lowering his gaze to the floor.
"Don't you dare let that bring you down," Peter whispered, moving towards him again. He brushed Neal's hair back with his left hand, caressing Neal's cheek with his right. "I don't hold you accountable for what they did. As far as I'm concerned, you've been nothing but faithful all these years." Neal nodded slowly and Peter kissed his forehead. "Honey, don't do this to yourself. Please."
Neal nodded again, exhaling shakily. "I know you don't hold it against me. I honestly try not to think about it all that much because it does bother me." Peter wrapped his arms around the younger man and Neal slid his arms around Peter's neck, leaning into him. "I'm all right, babe. I just…you know."
"I do know," he said softly. He knew exactly what Neal wasn't saying. "I don't think you're a whore and I don't think you're dirty." Rubbing Neal's back soothingly, he whispered, "You're my beautiful husband and I love you to death. What they did to you wasn't your fault and I don't think you're unmanly because of them. It takes strength and courage to survive what you did." Neal nuzzled his face against his husband's throat. "I'm very proud of you for trying so hard."
"I wouldn't be able to do it without you," Neal whispered against him. "I didn't know how to cope on my own. What I did to cope was… I regret it." Peter nodded, knowing his husband wished things had been different. "If all that pain and depression led me to you, then it was so fucking worth it."
Peter chuckled lightly, kissing his hair. "I'm here to stay, baby boy. I have you and our kiddos." Neal always loved when Peter said things like this. After almost six years, he still craved that knowledge that Peter is happy with him, that Peter wants to be with him and raise a family with him.
•◊•
Peter sat at the far end of the conference room table with Neal on his right hand side and Kramer off to his left. He was watching the older man critically and he could see Kramer making judgments about the younger man. Neal was working diligently with them, skimming through some files Kramer brought to them. Neal was pissed off and jealous around Kramer, but he knew he still had his job to do, so he put his personal feelings aside and did as he was asked—and also because it was Peter who brought him the file and asked him for his insight. "I know Shane Debora. He's more than likely involved in all of this," the younger man said suddenly. Peter refocused on his husband and gave him a look of question. "I have a…background with criminals," he hesitantly answered. "Shane is a forger and these manuscripts you had scanned definitely fit his MO. The way the letters are slanted gave him away."
Kramer raised an eyebrow as he listened to Neal speak. He wondered how Neal had such connections since he'd gone on to become a Federal Agent. "And how, may I ask, do you have this background?"
"He doesn't have to answer to—"
Neal rested his hand on Peter's, gently gripping his fingers. "It's okay," he said quietly. Glancing at Kramer, he answered, "I was homeless when I was sixteen. I ran away from home and came here to start my life over. I befriended someone who's been here for me since the day we met and he does some highly questionable things, but he has contacts." Kramer wondered how Neal knew those contacts though. "My friend taught me a few tricks when we were on our own. I met with some of his contacts to pull cons and such every now and then. They were never severe and no one was ever hurt. Mo—my friend only brought me along for cons when we were in need of food and such."
Kramer nodded, despising him even more. "So this friend of yours… You've given him immunity?" Neal shook his head and was about to reply, but Kramer interrupted him. "Why have you not reported his crimes?"
"He's my friend, but he's never done anything with the intention of hurting someone." That wasn't entirely true. Mozzie never intended on killing anyone, but he'd injured a few people when they messed with Neal. "His crimes shouldn't even be considered crimes. Everything he did when I was a teenager and in my early twenties was to help me."
"Why didn't you go to a shelter or home of some sort when you arrived here? There are facilities that provide for victims of rape."
"Find me a God damn known facility that would have helped a male rape victim," Neal snapped. "I didn't have any way of knowing where the hell I could have gone or was supposed to go. You never hear anything about men who are raped. I was raped for almost three years before I escaped." Peter kept his eyes on Neal, hating how Kramer made his husband so emotional and upset. Neal's voice was shaky as he spoke, but he was trying his hardest to stay adamant. "I was homeless, alone, and a victim of rape. I trusted no one because no one deserved my trust. I didn't even trust my own mother," he growled.
Peter watched Neal's eyes glaze over and he felt awful. "Don't talk about it anymore," Peter whispered, knowing that bringing up his worst moments hurt quite a bit. Neal hated that he'd been homeless, living on the streets. He hated how low he had fallen in life. Of course he was in a better place now, but he'd suffered for a while emotionally, psychologically, and physically. Neal's lips were quivering and Peter could see the anguish that was going to erupt. Neal abruptly shoved his chair back and tried to pull away from Peter, but Peter gripped his hand a little tighter. "Baby boy, don't run from me," he pleaded quietly. "I'm here."
"Just let me have a few minutes to myself, okay?" he said, sounding bitter and angry. Peter frowned and nodded, letting go of his husband's hand. He left the conference room and made his way towards the bathrooms. Peter knew he wasn't going to run off and leave the building. Neal couldn't do that. He could seclude himself for a little while, but he eventually went right back to Peter because Peter is his rock.
Immediately turning on Kramer, Peter growled, "Was that necessary?" Kramer stared at him blankly as though he didn't understand why Peter was so upset. "His past has nothing to do with any of this. He has a friend who has criminal connections and he went through a very dark chapter when he was younger. To condemn him for surviving is bullshit." His jaw clenched as he thought about what his husband must be feeling right now. Neal regrets a lot of the things he lowered himself to as well as some things he morally shouldn't or wouldn't have done under different circumstances. "Neal's past is filled to the brim with pain and suffering. I don't need you filling his present with that as well. He's giving you advice and information for this damn case and I'll take him off of it if you continue to ostracize him. He doesn't need this case. I can easily assign him other cases that suit his abilities better since they won't be put into question."
Kramer raised an eyebrow. He strongly disliked Neal, but Neal was intelligent and his connections would be useful. "All I did was ask a few questions."
"Yes, and they were very select questions. If you're intentionally hurting my husband, I won't hesitate to report you to Reese—and then I can go over your head." He wasn't going to put up with this. He knew Neal was jealous of Kramer and he'd been trying to reassure Neal that there was no reason to worry. He swore he would never love anyone else and he said he hadn't been able to look at another man the way he looks at Neal since they began their relationship.
Neal came back into the conference room and Peter's eyes were immediately on him. Neal's eyes were red and his face was splotchy. "Can I talk to—" He cleared his throat, looking miserable. "Can I talk to Peter for a minute?"
Peter glared at Kramer and Kramer nodded, leaving the conference room. He shut the door behind him, leaving the couple to themselves. "Honey, are you okay?"
"No. I'm not okay," Neal said, sounding extremely upset. Peter nodded and stepped closer, but Neal held his hand up, immediately stopping Peter. "I criticize my own past because I know I did a lot of really stupid or wrong things. I'm not afraid to admit that, but I only admit it when you and I are alone in our bedroom." He blinked back tears and Peter wished Neal would let him hold him. "You have no idea how much that bastard pisses me off. You have no idea how much that bastard scares the shit out of me. I'm a rape victim, so fucking what? People get raped. I was raped. Shit happens to shitty people and I—"
"Don't," Peter pleaded. "Neal, there's no reason to degrade yourself." He closed the distance between them and hugged his husband, letting Neal cry against him like he knew he would. "You've never been a shitty person," Peter whispered. "You were a teenager—an innocent teenager. You never deserved any of that then and you never deserved any of what they did to you in recent years. You don't deserve to suffer and I wish I could take some of your pain and keep it to myself."
Neal shook his head, gripping the back of Peter's suit jacket roughly, balling it up in his fingers. "I'm so tired of being judged," he whispered thickly. "I didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to go or who to go to. If your mother betrayed you, wouldn't you be lost and confused?"
"Of course," Peter said softly. "Baby, I won't judge you for any of that. I know about your time on the streets and I'm just glad you never gave up." He kissed Neal's hair, whispering, "You are an amazing man and I didn't know you when you were a teenager, but I'd imagine that you were an amazing young man as well. You raised yourself as well as your son on your own. I can't even begin to imagine how stressful things were for you."
"Will this ever fucking stop?" he asked miserably, his voice muffled against Peter's neck. "I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling weak. I hate crying over this. I hate thinking about this." Peter rubbed Neal's back, kissing his hair repeatedly.
"Honey, I don't know if there will ever be a moment when you feel safe and secure. You were put through a lot of hell in the last twenty years. You know I don't blame you for being afraid or for being upset. You have every right to be afraid, upset, angry… Neal, I'm here for you no matter how bad you feel." Neal shuddered against him and Peter kept rubbing his back in an attempt to soothe him. "You'll never be alone again. You're my husband and I'm here to support you in any and every way I can."
Neal sobbed harder then and Peter didn't know what to do. He thought he was saying things that would help Neal get through this a little easier. It definitely hadn't been his intention to upset his husband. "I love you," he said. Peter barely understood him through his sobs, but he'd been with Neal long enough to decipher things he was saying when he was crying. "I couldn't do any of this without you. I just—I need you and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being so needy. You're probably sick of me crying all over you all the time."
Peter hushed him gently, cradling the back of Neal's head with his left hand while fanning his right fingers out over Neal's back. "If I were sick and tired of you, I would have left you," he whispered, "but I'm here, Neal, and I plan on staying here." Neal sounded absolutely miserable and Peter hated Kramer for doing this to him. "No matter what happens between us or to us individually, I refuse to walk away from you. I love you so damn much, baby. Without you… God, I can't even describe how empty and unfeeling I am without you."
The younger man eventually calmed down after Peter kept telling him things he knew, but doubted because of the way he was feeling at that moment. Peter always helped him through his lowest points and he really appreciated it. Sitting down in the chair near the end of the conference table, he whispered, "Thank you for being so patient with me all the time. You don't know how much it means to me to have a husband who cares about me twenty-four-seven."
Smiling, Peter knelt in front of his husband, resting his hands on Neal's thighs. "You are the love of my life. The last thing I want to do is let you go. I want you in my life and I'm thankful to have you and your love." Belatedly, Peter realized his hand was resting over the name engraved into Neal's thigh. He wanted to draw back and keep his hand away from the area, but he didn't want Neal to hurt more because he thought Peter considered him unattractive. Instead, he just let his hand rest there. He didn't move it, fearing that doing so would bring attention to it and send Neal over the edge. "If you feel alone and like you don't deserve your life, you come to me, honey." He shifted a bit and kissed Neal's forehead. "I'll remind you that I'm going to be right at your side—and that your life is worth living. You have three beautiful children who love you and a husband who would do anything for you."
"I know that," Neal said quietly, forcing a sad smile. "I don't understand how you can deal with me acting this way. I didn't understand years ago and I don't understand right now."
"What you're feeling is natural," Peter whispered. "Your feelings are human and I can't resent you or be disgusted with you for acting this way. I don't know what you went through personally, but I've watched you suffer and recover repeatedly since I met you. I know how strong you are and, not to be cliché or anything, this too shall pass, my love."
Neal cracked a little smile and that warmed Peter's heart considerably. He loved the way his husband smiled because he knew Neal had plenty of reasons not to. "I love you," he whispered, lifting his hands to caress the sides of Peter's face. He gently pulled Peter close and kissed him lovingly. "I know I thank you a lot, but thank you—for falling in love with me, for staying with me through it all, for being the man who understands me even if he doesn't understand." He kissed the older man again, sighing quietly. "I pray that you never know how this feels, Peter," he whispered. "I love you for being with me, for treating me like a normal man. You've never once looked at me in disgust or resentment… You've treated me fairly and equally for the most part and that means everything to me."
Peter chuckled, nodding. "You were everything to me when I met you and you still are to this day, my angel," Peter said softly. "I can't believe this year will be our sixth year together."
"It certainly doesn't feel that long."
Grinning, Peter nodded. "I know, baby."
"Every time I'm with you, I feel like I'm meeting you for the first time again." Peter felt much the same way every time he looked into Neal's eyes. The moment they'd met, the first thing that caught his eye was Neal's eyes. They were and still are so beautiful to him and he finds himself lost in them when he's given the opportunity to just gaze into his husband's eyes. "I like feeling this way. I like that you give me butterflies when you look at me." He looked a little ashamed a moment later and Peter didn't understand. "I wish I gave you more than a husband who falls apart so easily."
Peter groaned and lifted his hand off of Neal's scarred thigh, thankful that Neal didn't react, and he brushed Neal's hair back. "Baby boy, you have given me so much. You've given me all of yourself without knowing how much that means to me. You gave me a son and a home when we first got together." He rubbed his thumb over Neal's cheekbone and smiled as Neal leaned into his palm. "You've given me more than you realize, hon. Don't put yourself down, okay? I hoped by now that you'd know how deeply, truly, and irrevocably I love you for the man you are. I'll always remind you of that when you forget it."
Neal shook his head, whispering, "I don't know how you do it." Peter gave him a look of confusion. "I felt so shitty after Kramer put me on the spot and you just fixed everything. You're like a miracle worker." He watched his husband tense and wondered how Peter had taken offense to that. "What is it?" he asked quietly, concerned.
"If I were a miracle worker, you wouldn't have—"
"Don't," Neal pleaded. "You just told me that you don't want me to put myself down, so please don't do that to yourself." He took Peter's hand as he slowly got to his feet. Peter rose with him, standing in front of him very closely. "I can't tell you enough that I love you, Peter." He wrapped his arms around the older man and was pleased when Peter's arms immediately embraced him.
"Nor can I ever convey to you how much I love you," Peter whispered in response. "My love for you… It's limitless."
•◊•
"I hate you."
Neal chuckled and Nicky giggled. "Oh, don't bitch," Neal murmured, nudging his husband's ribs. Peter glared at him and Neal knew it wasn't real anger. He and Peter were laying on one couch while Nicky sat on the other. The babies were playing quietly in front of them while they watched a Yankees game. "Babe, you know this is a rerun. I've watched this with you before."
Peter muttered, "That doesn't mean you need to recap it for me play by play, Neal George Burke." Neal grinned twisting a bit so he could look up at Peter. Peter immediately kissed him, tightening his one armed hold on Neal's torso as he tugged him closer. They were pretty close as it was and Neal felt like Peter was trying to consume him. "I'm surprised you even remember this. You're usually reading while I'm watching the game."
"You know," Neal said sarcastically, "I do try to please my husband every now and then by actually spending time with him while pretending to enjoy something I know he loves." Peter rubbed Neal's abdomen, smiling to himself as Neal turned back towards the television. He could feel Peter's sudden erection spring to life behind him and it made his heart skip a beat to know he was able to do that to Peter so easily.
"You please me very much," he whispered in Neal's ear, kissing just below it a moment later.
"If you're going to have verbal sex, you can go upstairs, guys," Nicky said, sounding like he wasn't fazed at all by the quiet discussion between his fathers. Neal and Peter's faces both flushed because they both thought Peter had been quiet enough. "I love you both, but I want to watch the game."
Neal raised an eyebrow as he stared at his son. During the silence, Nicky met his dad's gaze and immediately looked very sheepish. Neal was giving him that 'daddy look' that Peter loved so much. He was silently warning his son to watch what he said to his poppa. Neal didn't particularly care if Nicky gave him sass because he's lived with Nicky since Nicky was born, but he didn't want Nicky talking to Peter like that. It was a very innocent—actually, it wasn't a very innocent comment. He brought up the one thing Peter felt very uncomfortable speaking about in front of Nicky. He didn't want Nicky to think it was okay to make flippant comments like that when their sex life was none of their son's business.
As Peter was rubbing Neal's stomach, Brie began to throw a fit—as well as her stuffed animals that Neal brought down for her. "Hey," Neal said gently as he slid off of the couch. Peter chuckled as Neal got onto his hands and knees beside their daughter. "Hey, princess," he whispered, kissing her hair. "What's wrong?" He glanced up just as Rebecca was coming downstairs. He found that to be a strange coincidence. One look up at Peter told Neal that Peter was thinking along the same lines as he was.
Neal shifted into a sitting position and pulled his daughter into his lap and gently rocked her, watching as Rebecca went into their kitchen. Something was off and he wondered if his little girl knew that, too. She's very smart, but he was also worried that something had been done to her by Rebecca. He wasn't going to make accusations just yet, but he also couldn't remember Rebecca ever being alone with the twins and it didn't explain why Joey was totally unaffected.
Peter's fingers combed through Neal's hair and Neal understood that as Peter's way of saying he was worried just as much. "It's okay," Peter said softly as he leaned over, smiling down at their daughter. "Daddy's got you, Brie." He moved his hand to brush the back of his fingers against Neal's cheek and Neal turned his head just enough to kiss Peter's fingers, making the older man chuckle—just as Rebecca came in.
Nicky was watching her just as cautiously as Peter was and Neal was still trying to get Brie to calm down. "Peter, I'm going to take her upstairs," he whispered. "I'll be back down in a minute or two." Glancing at his husband, he hoped he was telling Peter what he was doing.
Peter silently nodded. Neal was very knowledgeable of what to look for, so Peter let him take care of that while he kept an eye on Rebecca, who decided to sit on the couch beside Nicky. There was a slight distance between them, but he could see that Nicky was uncomfortable. As soon as he sat up and shifted his arm, Nicky grabbed his hand. Meeting his oldest son's eyes, he searched them and he could see how afraid Nicky was. He squeezed Nicky's hand and realized that he knew exactly what Neal was doing, which is why he was afraid.
The fact that Neal was taking so long to come back down concerned both Peter and Nicky. Joey was still playing in front of the couch.
By the time the younger man finally returned, Peter was extremely on edge and prepared to kill Rebecca on the spot. Neal met his gaze and subtly shook his head. Peter exhaled without having realized he was holding his breath.
Rebecca looked really bored as she watched the game with the Burkes. Neal sat down beside Peter after Peter pulled Joey up from the floor with his stuffed animals. "She's okay?" he whispered. He knew he was being quiet this time because the last thing he wanted to do was alert Rebecca that they were onto her if she'd done something.
"Yes," Neal whispered back. Glancing at his husband sadly, he added, "There weren't any physical signs. Pisses me off to think she could've…"
Peter nodded, kissing Neal's temple. "She would be dead in a second," Peter hissed quietly. "After everything, I won't let it happen to them." Neal leaned against him and Peter wrapped his left arm around his husband, knowing he was terrified. Neal always kept Nicky hidden from boyfriends or one night stand men because he was afraid that someone would do to Nicky what was done to him. He couldn't trust anyone with his son until he met Peter.
Neal knew Peter would take care of their children. Peter wasn't even capable of abuse as far as Neal was concerned. They had several moments when it looked like Peter wanted to hit him, but Peter never struck him and he never came close to doing so with their children. Neal closed his eyes as Brie sniffled on his lap and he listened to his husband breathe heavily beside him. He didn't even want to consider that his own child had been raped, but he took that very seriously, which is why he responded so seriously when Nicky came to him.
Both he and Peter knew that men and women were capable of raping their victims and neither of them knew what to expect from Rebecca. Neal, after his rapes, was determined to be himself instead of the man who ravaged him. He went on to become a great father, caring for his son more than anything and anyone else. He protected Nicky from other men because he didn't want Nicky to suffer.
Rebecca, on the other hand, was raped as well and they had no idea what she'd been through. For all they knew, Rebecca could become the rapist. It was possible, but Neal was terrified to think that he had a rapist living in his home again. He ran from Vincent's influence, but he wouldn't run from Rebecca. He would lock her up if she ever touched his children inappropriately now that he had the ability to actually do something about the situation.
He couldn't see any marks, trauma, or blood on his daughter when he'd taken her upstairs. Part of him wanted to take her and Rebecca in to have a fingernail test run, but he didn't think it made much sense for her to target their daughter when they had two sons. It wasn't that he preferred that she go after his sons instead of his daughter… He just assumed that, of all their children, Nicky would be her target for looking so much like him. Peter was overly protective of them both and he'd continue to be overprotective of his babies—encompassing his children and his husband.
Peter's fingers moved slowly on Neal's left side as he kept his eyes on Neal's face. He was going to keep a very close eye on Rebecca. They wouldn't let their guard down and believe she wasn't capable of this. Peter was afraid of letting her get away with something that would harm his kids. "Thank you," Neal whispered.
Brie laid back against Neal as Peter kissed Neal's hair. "The four of you are my babies," he teased lightly. "I love my babies and I'll protect them with everything I've got."
