The lights overhead beat down on her face like pure sunlight. It didn't even matter that it was artificial, because it was just how she liked it. There was never anything as perfect than laying under those stage lights and remembering she was finally a part of something. And it didn't hurt that she was good at it too.
The only time basking in the stage light was topped was when the actor was there to share it with her. Just as he was when he came to check on her before anything else when his scene had ended. The moment he was Ren Tsuruga again, she was the first thing on his mind. And it made her happier than she could ever believe.
His large hand enveloped hers completely as he pulled her up and she thanked him softly, almost under her breath and was rewarded with a beaming, radiant smile. Nothing ever beat that smile. It gave her more life than air itself. Something she always seem to have a short supply of around this man. Together, they rounded the stage to find all of their coworkers waiting rather impatiently.
Ren entered first and was welcomed by a wondrous cheer to which he scratched the back of his head sheepishly and waved before following out part of his makeup crew offstage to get changed for his next set of scenes.
The moment they spotted Sai, though, there was an eruption of incredibly loud noise - mostly praise. She blushed slightly as she situated herself to listen to each individual inquiry, as she always did. Before she could get too far into the question and answer session, though, she was interrupted a very startled looking assistant trying desperately to get her attention.
"U-um, Akai?" Came his meek voice, as he waved a hand.
She recognized him, he often brought her coffee in the morning. Kimihiro. "Yes, Mr. Sora? Is something wrong?" She asked, looking slightly concerned as she saw his worried expression.
"I'm actually not sure…" Kimihiro adjusted his jacket and pulled out her cell phone she'd left in her dressing room. "Your makeup team asked me to give you this; they say it's been ringing off the hook, nonstop all morning."
Quickly, she pulled the phone from his hand and flipped it open, revealing over thirty missed calls and a few messages all from the same number. One she recognized. "I, uh, hope everything's okay, Akai. I really hope nothing's wrong, but if there is, you have my best wishes." He sent her what he hoped was a comforting smile as he flipped on his headset again and resumed his job.
She began twirling the device through her fingers as she pondered what to do. Something was very wrong, she could feel it. He would never call her this much unless something was wrong. He just wasn't like that. The more she thought about it, the more panicked she got and it was starting to show.
The actress sent a worried glance over to Tengen who simply nodded and shooed her off. "Go. Sort it out. Get back to me. That was an incredible performance, take a little time to cool off and deal with all of that."
Sai melted with relief and nodded, "Thank you, Director, sir! I'll be back as fast as I can," she assured him with a quick bow.
"And don't be afraid to take some time to figure out anything, Akai. You know I have your back right?" The director smiled at her and gestured to the cast she'd spent months getting to know. "We're all here for you."
She beamed and nodded happily, clutching her cell phone to her chest and scurrying off to her dressing room. Shutting herself inside, she immediately hit the redial key and held the phone to her ear. Her call was picked up within seconds, after only the first or second ring.
"Asami, is that you? Thank god you called back…" Said a smooth tenor voice from the other end, clearly sounding like he'd been through hell and back.
Most of the studio lost track of how long she'd been gone. They'd took down the entire bridge set and reconstructed the campus, all at near record speed, but it was still a long time for someone to be on the phone. The longer they waited, the tenser the air became. The longer she was gone, the higher the likelihood something was wrong became. The longer she was gone, the more afraid everyone was that she'd fallen apart.
Ren's long legs carried him down the lengthy hallway back to the main studio, his manager at his side reviewing their next two events that day. He'd just finished his rather large costume change and was ready to shoot his second scene that day, already getting himself psyched up and in character.
He pushed open the large doors at the end of the hall and stopped completely short. Something seemed ominously wrong. The air was thick and heavy, humid and dense. Like it had a physical presence. It was extremely unsettling and it rose the small hairs on the back of his neck like something was crawling there.
Upon seeing him, Tengen lit up and let loose a sigh of relief. "Oh, there you are! Finally! Thank god, now we can work on something!" He said happily as he started rattling off instructions into his microphone. Ren and Yashiro exchanged a look. As far as they knew, they were supposed to take a little over two hours to finish the costume change and Sai was supposed to shoot the last few bits of her final episode as a living character.
The schedule had been a solid block, never wasting a moment. But if that was so...why was there no one on stage? Why was no one set up? Where were all the actors?...Where was Sai? Why wasn't she up there commanding all of the atmosphere- and what was with the tense atmosphere in the first place?
"Forgive me, sir, but didn't you have a handful more to shoot of Ms. Akai?" He reverted back to her last name as he always did when in the presence of either's employers. "I'm sure it was written that way on the schedule at least."
"Well…" Tengen started, casting a long glance toward the doors at the opposite side of the room. "Yes, that's true. We were supposed to finish filming for her today, but...it looks like something's come up."
"'Something's come up'? What are you talking about?" The actor asked, thoroughly confused at this point. "What happened while I was gone?" His mind started on that downward spiral, "Is she alright, nothing's happened, has it-"
Tengen put his hands on the actor's broad chest to stop him and he leveled his gaze to the younger actor's, "You have to understand, son, I haven't the faintest idea what's happening, but it's no help to her to just panic aimlessly out here. Whatever's happening can't be good, she'd be back by now if it was nothing big. But before you react to that, wait for her. If you're already freaking out when she gets here, she wouldn't feel like telling you would be her best bet."
Reluctantly, the actor nodded. Yes, that's how Sai worked, for sure. Everyone else came before her and her emotions. She always seemed to put herself by the wayside if it meant that other people could be happier. She'd been that way with him and with anyone he'd ever seen her interact with. So if it was for her sake, he'd be calm while he waited patiently like everyone else.
"Where is she right now?" He finally cleared his throat and asked.
The lead artist who had been working on her earlier that morning piped up from sitting cross-legged on the floor playing cards with the other members of Himeko's team. "She's back in her dressing room, on her phone. Someone had been calling her nonstop and she ran right away to answer him when she finished shooting."
"'Him'? Who is she talking to? How do you know it's a him?"
"Oh, his voice is so silky, you can hear it even from the other side of the door," one of the younger artists squealed. "He's obviously a guy."
"And probably a pretty cute one too," her dark haired friend added in.
"Regardless of his looks…" The lead sent her coworkers a warning glance, "He's obviously pretty important to her. Really serious boyfriend, maybe even fiance or something like that."
The man's lips parted in shock and his eyes widened visibly, appearing totally taken aback by the comment. "I know!" One of the girl's responded to his expression, "I was shocked too! I mean, I had my suspicions on Valentine's Day when she made up that obvious fib with her best friend, she was totally going to meet a guy!"
"Hey, you don't know that!" Another replied playfully, "She may have just had a good relationship with her friend! Lady's night out! Celebrating being single!"
"Perhaps," the lead said with a twinkle in her eye, "But regardless of Valentine's Day, she sure bickers with that guy like they've known each other for a long time."
"Yeah…" One replied dreamily, "Like long-term lovers...perfect for each other but divided because of some clash of society…"
"Stop thinking like a romance novel," the dark haired one scoffed, "They probably just have problems like any normal couple."
"I think this one is a pretty serious argument, though...sounds like they were fighting about him moving in, or something."
Jealousy and anger seemed to be such a common part of Ren's relationship with the redhead. But this time was different. This one crossed a line. This time there was no searing heat in his chest. His blood wasn't boiling. He wasn't on the verge of hyperventilating. No, this time he was just numb.
She could lie about how she looked. She could lie about roles she played. She could even lie about her feeling to him, but this was too much. Hiding such a serious, committed relationship while stringing him along and making moves on him, spending so much intimate time with him and allowing his feelings to fester and grow while she just sat back and watched. Now that was worse than the betrayal he'd felt before. It was unforgivable. He couldn't understand how she could do this to him.
"Ren!" He could hear Tengen behind him and he turned around, his lips upturning in a forced, stretched out, radiant smile. He felt empty inside. Hollow. Not even cold, just void. But it didn't matter when you were an actor. Pulling a smile was as easy as breathing.
"Coming, sir!" He called back, jogging toward the stage. Of course, the complete lack of his own presence in the scene made it that much easier for Toshiro to fully take over his body. And he was commended for it. But the praise didn't reach his heart like it usually did. It didn't make him feel warm inside. It didn't bring a smile to his lips. He had to plaster one there like a rotting wound needing a makeshift bandage.
The first thing to move him was the sound of the door clicking open as the natural redhead slipped through the opening. Her wig was a mess. She looked frazzled and dazed, frustrated and disappointed. Her features were twisted and actively moving. That alone proved that something was terribly wrong.
The sight of her seeming so forlorn about her lying and manipulating finally lit a spark in his chest cavity. It wasn't intense like usual. Not fiery or bright, fueled by cruel comments and witty retorts. No, this was dark, venomous, furious. He was done with this shit.
Spotting his tall frame immediately, the redhead seemed to brighten a little bit. He was always a beacon of light when nothing seemed to be going right around her. "Ah, Ren…" She said softly, offering him an exhausted smile. "It's good to see you again, I never got to thank you after the scene ended."
"No need." He said tersely, nearly cutting off what the blonde was saying. The actor was showing absolutely no outward signs of anger. His face was totally unmoving and still, his voice stiff but not clipping. But she still knew. She always knew. She'd spent so long just watching people that even the slightest ticks gave them away.
She instantly recoiled, the safety she felt around him vanishing in the blink of an eye. Suddenly everything she'd been hoping to do seemed to fade from existence in the face of what was probably the most anger she'd ever see from the talented actor. It was directed right at her. Concentrated all on her. But why?!
"R-Ren...uh…" Her nerves rattled her violently and she shook, her breath tripping and catching as she tried to force words out of her throat. "Would you mind...if we talked in private?" She couldn't do this anymore. She didn't want to talk to him when he was like this, especially in front of other people, but she couldn't stand to wait. Everything hinged on his conversation.
His lips upturned and he scoffed, but his gaze wasn't warm and soft like usual. This one cut like a razor blade, ripping her words up and spitting them back out. It was cold and radiated only the barest, rawest hints of fury. He raised his arms up and gestured to the studio widely, "If you want to talk, if you have anything you'd like to get off of your chest, anything you'd like to ask, go ahead and do it here."
Sai cringed, already having expected his behavior from him. She wished she could curl up somewhere. Everyone's eyes were on her. But their looks weren't ones of awe, but ones of tense degrees and mixtures of fear and nervousness.
Still, she did everything she could to calm herself. This had to go well. It was her only choice. Taking a deep breath and swallowing her fear, she started again, "I need a favor."
"A favor? A 'favor' you say...now, forgive me if I'm wrong, Ms. Akai…" He began darkly, dropping the temperature several degrees and finally keying everyone in the room in that they were actually watching Ren Tsuruga act cruel toward a woman who had done seemingly nothing wrong. It was truly scary. "...But friends do favors for one another. And what do friends do? Oh, yes, that's right. They don't keep secrets, they don't lie to each other."
The redhead froze up. Her eyes searching his whole form desperately for any hint about what he could be going on about. Clearly, something had happened while she was on the phone, something he'd figured out, but...but he couldn't have learned she was...that she wasn't who she said she was. No, there wasn't any way to connect her. The only person who knew in the country was more sworn to secrecy than she was. It was impossible. Right?
"If you need a favor, Ms. Akai…" Now his voice was dangerously low. To the point where it made her hair stand on end and cold shivers shoot unpleasantly down her spine. "Why don't you try asking a friend of yours."
His words clamped down painfully on her heart and she took a step forward. How was she supposed to approach this? If he found out about Asami...what was she supposed to say? She was waiting for the right time, that's all? That's the oldest, lamest, dumbest excuse in the universe...except for how truthful it was.
"Y-you don't understand, Ren-"
"Oh, I don't understand? Am I not seeing it from your point of view enough?"
"Yes, that's exactly it! You have to know that something...like...this...well, it just doesn't come up during dinner conversation or anything…"
"Oh, no? You don't think so? Never thought to mention that during the multitudes of times either one of us spent time together? You had over two years, Sai! What kept you from telling me? What made you keep it to yourself all this time? Just tell me, please, something…"
"W-well...not to myself, I mean, Lory knew, but-"
"Wait, he knew? And he still let me...he…" Ren ground his teeth together and snapped his gaze to the floor. They'd both gone and betrayed him. That man had a thousand and a half opportunities to tell him pursuing the redhead was a bad idea because she was taken, but oh, no, they both had to put up the big act to make it seem like his greatest desires had even the smallest chance of realization.
Sai watched the actor struggle to keep his emotions in check, as out of control as they already were. In all honestly, he'd lost her again...his thoughts didn't seem to match up with hers, but she couldn't think of any other explanation.
"Then tell me...tell me, Sai, how long has this been going on? Were you ever going to tell me?"
"'Been going on'...?" Sai echoed, honestly at a loss. She supposed her real name had been "going on" since she was born, but that didn't make any sense...why would he ask that?
"Don't play dumb!" He yelled back at her confused expression, "You already started trying to justify yourself!"
"I think...we're talking about different things…" The actress tried, her head beginning to throb violently as she tried to scrape together the remnants of this hopeless conversation.
"Oh, so now you're admitting you're keeping multiple things from me, hmm?" He growled, glowing openly at her.
"Like you aren't!" The redhead countered, finding guilty pleasure in watching him flinch at that. "And you're forgetting, I need something from you, so please can we save this for later?"
"You need me for something? Is that how I work to you? Didn't you hear me before, ask someone else-"
"There is no one else!" Sai insisted, "Just listen to me! If you don't want to do it as a favor, then let me ask you professionally! You don't have to be friends for a business transaction, do you?"
The actor seethed silently for a moment before parting his lips and hissing out, "No. I suppose you do not. What do you want?"
"Can we please go somewhere else to talk about it, Mr. Tsuruga?" She asked, switching into professional mode. "It's really a rather personal-"
He scoffed again, turning slightly away from her in disgust, "If you're asking me professionally, then there's no need to go anywhere. Give me your business proposal or I walk away." He threatened. And he meant it this time.
"T-that's...true…" The talent admitted, clutching her shirt her her hands tightly to reduce the shaking in her limbs. This was a million times harder than she thought it would be. She did everything she could to gulp down the awkwardness and fear, the uncomfortableness and the embarrassment. She just needed to ask him. "I want to hire you to be my fiance for a week."
The entire room stopped moving for a minute and most feeling left Ren's body. Her words battered around and echoed off of the studio walls. Everyone had been forming their own notions about what was happening and if there was ever a curveball in the proceedings, that was it.
What she was asking made no sense; most assumed she'd been on the phone with her fiance, but if that wasn't him, then who was it? And why did she need Ren to play one? Why did she need one in the first place? Nothing fit together anymore and suddenly the situation seemed a million times more complicated.
Regaining control over his limbs, the actor moved back until he was facing the petite girl in front of him. He purposely kept himself from feeling anything in that moment. He needed more information and freaking out at that point was just going to make things worse. And he couldn't be angry either, lest he drive her away anymore than he'd already managed to that morning.
"Can you...go over that one more time?" He finally asked her, his face completely blank and calculating.
"I...need you to pose as my fiance. Only for a week. I'll even pay you if you want since I am hiring you-"
"Why on God's green earth do you need me to do that?" He asked her, unconsciously favoring complete and utter confusion as the correct emotion to feel at that moment. "Are you asking me that because of that phone call? Who the hell was on the other end of that?"
The air shifted once more and Sai averted her eyes, bringing up a hand to clutch at her opposite arm. "Um…" She laughed once, although it was tinny and humorless. "Well, uh, it's kind of a funny story…" Her lips fell and her posture seemed to slump down in defeat. "Actually...I guess it's the opposite of funny...I'm sorry…"
Her strikingly colored irises shifted up to peer at him out of the corner of her eye. They weren't blue this time. They were gray. And not a soft gray like clouds at dusk. These were thunderstorm clouds. Streaks of gray, black, and blue that screamed warnings of terror, flood, and fury. Her pupils were completely dilated, consuming a large part of the color and blackening them, further darkened by the shade of her thick lashes that were slowly gathering tear drops as she blinked, warning of rain before the terrible storm.
Her voice came out soft, even scared, but this time the fear wasn't directed at him. It was caused by something else. Something that terrified her more than he ever had. "My brother. It's...my brother. Shota. He's...coming. He's coming here, to Japan, in about a month…"
His chest immediately felt like it was collapsing. He'd had it all wrong. She'd never been dating anyone. She hadn't lied and hidden all that for so long. And he'd treated her like shit when she'd been standing there suffering from her own set of problems.
He'd never felt such crushing, gnawing guilt before and it already felt like it was eating him from the inside out. He'd have to pay her back big for jumping to conclusions based on rumors he hadn't had the chance to verify. Just like he had when she'd first joined the agency. He was no different than he was back then, judging everything at face value and not going any further to understand her. He'd never be worthy of her.
He took a step closer and could have cried when he saw her flinch and look up at him fearfully. Choosing not to react to that, he accepted his actions and started trying to remedy rather than dwell on them. He put a warm hand on her shoulder and met her eyes. Everything was okay. It was all going to be all right.
And suddenly, her safe haven was back. Sai looked once more at the man she'd come to love and watched his eyes melt completely, surrounding her with the warmth and tender affection they always did. This was her Ren, right here. A perfect mix of his chosen persona and Kuon, his birth personality. He was both. And he was the most mixed when he was just focused on her and it was the part of him she loved more than anything else.
"You still didn't tell me why you'd want me to play your...fiance." It was incredibly difficult to even say the word. He was still looking at logistics rather than factoring in his emotions. That was a beast to handle completely on his own time. He could panic later, he could collapse later, he could break down later. Because he was accepting her offer, no matter what for.
"He...wants to take me back to America with him…" The redhead whispered, staring pointedly at her sneakers. The words were soft and meek, terribly out of character for her.
So taken by surprise by such a concept, the actor couldn't even forge any sort of reply. If her brother took her back, he might never see her again. And life without her would never be the same, it would never be good again. It wouldn't be worth it.
At his silence, the actress took it as an opportunity to explain herself a little more and she cleared her throat, "I tried every trick in the book to fool him into thinking I was busy all the time, but nothing worked. Nothing work or career oriented, nothing to do with the people I'd met or even my legal guardian. He was relentless.
"On a whim, without any prompting or thought to it...I claimed I had a fiance. It worked too...he let me off the hook since I was getting tied down. But there was a catch. He has to meet my 'fiance' and approve of him, or he'll take me anyway."
"Why...didn't you just tell him...no?" Ren asked, not really understanding why she was going to such lengths with her brother when he clearly didn't want to have anything to do with her or her life.
"I know it might not make sense, Ren…" Her voice was oddly cold and sharp, echoing over the walls and set pieces. It was eerie and off putting, like someone else entirely was speaking. "Telling him no just isn't an option. We're both broken people and we function the only way we can."
Deciding not to pry any further into what were still obvious wounds, he simply clenched his fists together to clamp down his emotions. "So why do you want my help? There's no one that knows you better or can help you pass as a fiancee?"
"Of course not, I wouldn't trust anyone else with this. It's a huge responsibility and I really need you to consider how tough this is going to be. I need someone I can put my life at stake for, someone I'd be willing to give up anything for, and all vice versa.
Ren focused his gaze on her for a long time until he came to the inevitable conclusion. Her entire fate and future depended on his ability to look like her fiance. If he refused, she'd have to leave...and he couldn't imagine an afternoon without her. A life without her. The words slipped from his lips before he could stop them. Not that he really wanted to.
"I'll do it then, I promise." He said as genuinely as he could. He just wanted her to be happy. But judging by her expression, the thought of going so far away from the people she loved the most made her more miserable than he'd ever seen her. And he'd make her happy if it was the last thing he'd ever do.
