"But she misses it, Atlantis," Sam said. "I can tell she misses it."

"See, that's what I think would happen to you."

"Maybe …"


CHAPTER 55: BACK TO ABNORMAL

One week later …

Samantha Carter O'Neill sat quietly, enjoying the undisturbed peace of her office sanctuary. The past week with Jack had been wonderful. Fortunately, the base ran smoothly during that time, somehow safe from Replicator, Genii, Wraith or any other variety of enemy attack. If she wasn't careful, the head of Homeworld Security would think she wasn't actually working after all.

As it was, he'd spent a good part of this visit showing her how impressed he was with her professional efforts. As always, that felt good. She'd valued his opinion since the moment they'd met in the SGC briefing room, twelve long years ago. Jack was still her ideal of a professional soldier, especially when it came to common sense, courage under fire and battle strategy. His approval meant the world to her. Jack O'Neill knew her well, sometimes better than she knew herself. So when he questioned her decision to leave Atlantis at the end of her current tour, she was taken aback to say the least.

He loved her, of that Sam had no doubt. It wasn't that he wanted her distant so he could have his freedom. He loved her and communicated those feelings loud and clear once more during the last six days, ten hours and fifteen minutes. One sentence said it all as far as he was concerned. "If I knew you'd be happy, I'd pack you up myself, today." And he would, laughing and celebrating as if there were no tomorrow. But more than the pleasure and solace of her company, he wanted her honest to goodness happiness and fulfillment. That was the catch. At that moment, Sam realized anew what a fortunate woman she was. She was married to a man who willingly placed her fulfillment before his own happiness. That was love, of that much she was certain.

As Jack left, he promised to trust in her decision, however it might play out. Now she had only to decide. Part of her hoped he'd say "great" when he heard what she wanted to do and everything would be settled. But his questions had set her thinking again. Would it be enough for her to be General Jack O'Neill's wife, a full bird Colonel assigned to an Earth bound command, probably somewhere in Washington? Or was he right? Would she eventually start to resent him, even blame him for derailing her career? Right now, she couldn't imagine ever resenting Jack, but anything was possible. Now if they had a child, so much would be different. To Sam's way of thinking, it would stand to reason she'd stay home, at least a little while and start to raise a family with Jack. Beyond a shadow of a doubt she knew that's what she wanted. But that little detail, getting pregnant, was unlikely to happen.

Feeling herself begin to fall down the dark hole of sadness she'd fought against for months, Sam was relieved to hear a voice other than her own.

"He's gone, isn't he?"

Sam looked up from the pile of paperwork on her desk to see Teyla standing in the doorway.

"Yes, General O'Neill shipped out with the IOA representatives about an hour ago," Sam said, her voice noticeably devoid of emotion. "Come in, Teyla."

The Athosian woman took a seat by Sam's desk and studied her commanding officer closely. Sam's eyes were puffy, she'd obviously been crying. Unfortunately, this brilliant woman insisted on keeping her feelings close to her, reluctant to share with anyone on base. She needed a friend and Teyla intended to volunteer her services.

"It was a pleasure to spend some time with General O'Neill," Teyla said. "He is a very pleasant man."

"That he is," Sam said simply.

"Everyone seemed to appreciate his visit, except perhaps Dr. McKay," Teyla went on to observe. "Rodney did not seem comfortable with General O'Neill."

Teyla's words reminded Sam how her husband, a two star General, had managed to spend time with many of the military personnel and staff on the base during his visit. He'd shared meals and recreation time with them, as well as asking more formal questions about their work as part of the security assignment. He was good with people in spite of himself. And as always his slightly off kilter humor was infectious.

"People in Jack's command have always felt a good deal of loyalty towards him. He realizes it's important to get to know the men and women he's responsible for," Sam said, remembering the qualities of leadership she'd always admired. "As for Rodney's reaction…"

"Yes, what did happen?" Teyla asked. "Dr. McKay was strangely subdued this morning."

"If you must know, Rodney came to my quarters last night with something he considered an emergency. Seems he was so excited he didn't think to call first. Anyway, I was sleeping when he arrived, so Jack decided to get the door and not wake me. The rest as they say is history."

In spite of herself, Sam began to chuckle as she recalled Jack's imitation of Rodney's face when he'd come to the door last night. When Teyla started to laugh as well, Sam knew her companion was imagining the same thing.

After a moment of shared laughter at Dr. McKay's expense, the conversation turned more serious.

"I can see General O'Neill loves you a great deal," Teyla observed haltingly, hoping Sam would find her way clear to speak about her own feelings.

Taken off guard, Sam blushed. Inhaling deeply, she looked up at Teyla.

"And I feel the same way," she replied quietly.

It wasn't the sentiment that surprised Teyla, but the fact it had crossed Sam's lips in her presence. Teyla's natural empathy had been heightened by her pregnancy. That being said, she was aware not only of Sam's strong love for her husband, but the turmoil now in her heart.

"I know," Teyla said gently. "So it is right that you miss him now."

"Three more months, Teyla," Sam said. "If everything goes according to plan, I won't see Jack face-to-face for three more months."

"Yours is a difficult path, Colonel," the now noticeably pregnant woman observed.

Sam looked up at Teyla thoughtfully, "Please call me Sam. I need someone to call me Sam, not Colonel," she said with feeling. "And some days the path is more difficult than others."

"You want to go home, do you not?" Teyla stated, more than asked.

Sam's surprise at the other woman's statement was palpable, and showed on her face. "How did…" she began. Then she remembered Teyla's uncanny sensitivity and that she probably wasn't all that difficult to read. "Yes, I want to be with him. I think that's where I belong now. But will it be enough?"

"It is a question no woman can answer for another, Sam," Teyla said. "I believe you will come to the right answer for you as time goes on."

"I wish I were as sure of it as you are," Sam stated. "And what about you Teyla, what are your plans these days?"

"That is part of the reason I stopped by this afternoon," the Athosian woman replied. "It is time for me to return to Athos. As I mentioned two months ago, at a certain point in their pregnancies, all Athosian women who live off-world are expected to return to their homeland. My pregnancy is now six months along. It is time to travel home."

To Sam's eyes, it was clear Teyla was far from happy at the prospect of returning to Athos. It was understandable as most of her friends were now on Atlantis.

"But you haven't lived on Athos for nearly five years," Sam said. "Certainly an exception could be made."

Teyla, still less then enthusiastic about carrying the pregnancy to term hung her head momentarily. "It is expected. Don't worry; it is not as bad as you think. I still have friends and even distant relatives on Athos," she said. "And I am hoping my friends from Atlantis may visit from time to time."

"That they will," Sam assured her. "Count on it."

OoOoOo

Meanwhile, in the Milky Way Galaxy, Jack was greeted by old friends when he returned through the Stargate.

Daniel had returned from his own off-world dig only yesterday. Teal'c had been called away on a personal emergency earlier that week, only to return that very morning. After Jack's initial debrief with General Landry and the ever present Richard Woolsey, he joined his fellow SG1 alums in the commissary.

"I see the food hasn't improved much since I've been gone," Jack quipped. "Then of course I'm here for the company, not the food."

"How is she, Jack?" Daniel asked, moments after they'd sat down. Both he and Teal'c had been disappointed to find their schedules ruled out a trip to Atlantis for the anniversary.

"She's a great commander, a strong leader," Jack said, missing the point as usual.

"How is Sam?" Daniel clarified. It would never change. Jack would always try to avoid the feeling aspect of any conversation.

"Confused?" Jack said, perplexed himself. "I don't know, Daniel. She says she wants to come home."

"Well she has leave coming up at the six month mark, right?" Daniel observed.

"More than that, she has a decision to make," Jack said. "It's the end of her tour."

"You mean she may come home permanently," Daniel stated. "That's great. You must be thrilled. You are, aren't you," the younger man questioned, stymied by the strange look on his friend's face.

"She'd be giving up a lot if she came home at this point," Jack said, voicing his concern. "Her career's taking off. I don't want her to do something she'll regret."

Teal'c sat quietly, munching through a mound of grapes and other assorted fruit piled haphazardly on his tray. He listened intently as Daniel continued to respond to Jack.

"Call me crazy Jack, but I can't imagine Sam thinking that coming home to you would be a mistake," Daniel said.

Jack shrugged, "She'd never admit it, even if it was. I want her to be happy, Daniel."

By now Teal'c had heard enough.

"O'Neill, I believe Samantha knows her own mind," he said. "I believed also that you had more faith in her."

Teal'c's insight never ceased to amaze Jack. A bona fide warrior, whose brawn spoke volumes and often made it unnecessary to speak aloud, the Jaffa leader had carefully honed a tempered understanding of human nature over the past few years. His insight into one stubborn Irishman was second to none. And when he spoke, Jack listened.

"Like Daniel Jackson, I had wanted to accompany you to Atlantis last week. Only an hour before your departure, I received a message from Ishta, requesting my immediate presence. Her tone was urgent and this concerned me greatly. As you know, Ishta is a fiercely independent woman, a warrior of great skill and cunning. Yet the woman I found upon my return to her home planet was … different."

"You did tell us she's expecting, Teal'c," Jack said, wondering where his friend was going with this."

"Indeed, she is," Teal'c conceded, with a calm smile and his usual nod of the head. "And yet, I believe the changes I am seeing are more than her pregnancy. It has been my observation that Jaffa women begin to change their priorities at a certain point in their lives."

Teal'c definitely had both Daniel and Jack's attention now. Their good friend was going to explain the mystery of the opposite sex. This they had to hear.

"Go on …" Daniel encouraged.

"It is quite self-evident, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said with an air of quiet authority. "It is well known among our people that the most fierce warrior women often abandon their single minded pursuit of conquest and adventure in order to pursue what you would refer to as 'a relationship'."

"So, what, did Ishta suddenly go all soft and mushy on you?" Jack asked, not exactly able to picture Teal'c's warrior princess without a weapon, let alone "pursuing a relationship".

For the briefest moment, Teal'c appeared confused. Then he replied, "I had never thought of Ishta in such a manner. It is not possible. In fact, what happened when I arrived was quite the opposite."

"Don't keep us in suspense, T. What happened?" Jack asked, getting impatient for the punch line.

"Ishta appeared distraught when I arrived," Teal'c said, "almost angry. She insisted we must find a way to be together, to build a home together. She was not 'soft and mushy' O'Neill. She was quite strong in her demands, and willing to forfeit much of her independence of movement to obtain this desire. I asked her whether she might regret no longer moving from place to place with her warriors after the birth of the child."

"What did she say?" Daniel asked.

"Ishta said, 'There comes a time when every woman decides what is truly at the center of her life. If a man is involved he must understand and accept her decision.'"

TBC


A/N: Thanks to all for your feedback on the last chapter.

Please review this one as well. I'm eager to hear what you think. I hoping it sets up some of the final action of this piece.

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