Disclaimer: Tite Kubo owns bleach
Chapter 50
Bring Me to Life
I realized Unmei was right. I had to quit living in the past. I needed to learn from the mistakes I make back then, so I wouldn't make them again and then let it go. That is so much easier said than done.
I went back to Sosuke's room and spent some time with Raina. She always made me feel better about things. She was my light. When I looked in her eyes, I knew everything was going to be ok. I spent the rest of the morning with her, which was quite a while. I was glad she was staying awake more these days, because that meant that I could spend more time with her. I loved our mommy/daughter time. It definitely made my day better. I was excited that she was 11 weeks old now. Her movements were getting smoother as opposed to her jerky movements as a newborn. She smiled at people when they came in the room. She was very friendly, hardly ever cried. She was even starting to reach for people now. When I pulled her into a sitting position, she was able to keep her head steady and in line with the rest of her body. I was proud of my baby girl, though I did feel like she was growing up so fast.
I put her down for a nap around lunchtime. She was so tired from all the playing we did. She tried her hardest to fight the sleep, but she didn't win. I was getting hungry, so I decided to go to the cafeteria to get me something to eat. I had Ha Kaze watch over Raina. When I got there, I saw Tia and her fracción sitting at one of the tables. They automatically called me over to sit with them.
"Did you find your child, Kristen-sama?" Apache asked me.
"Ah, no. I decided not to look. A wise person told me that I should stop living in the past and I intend on doing so."
"Very good advice." Tia commented.
"I do have a problem."
"What is it?" Tia asked.
"Shane's funeral is tomorrow and I'm going. It's a problem because I don't know how I'm going to handle it. I don't want to cry over him anymore."
"Why even go after all he put you through?" Apache asked.
"The guy was a bastard." Mila-Rose stated.
"I agree." Sun-sun said.
"He put you through hell, Kristen-sama. He doesn't deserve your tears. You have to be strong and know that your life is much better without him in it." Tia said.
"I know all that, but it's just not that easy."
"It never is. I don't know exactly what happened between you two before he came here, I've just heard stories. From what I know he wanted power over you." Tia said.
"Yes, he did."
"You can't let him have that power over you, Kristen-sama. I know he's dead, but you're still letting him rule your life by crying over him and being worried about it. Don't give him that. This is your life and you're the only one who should control it." Tia said.
"Your right."
"You shouldn't have to pay your respects to someone who never respected you." Sun-sun said.
"You shouldn't even go." Mila-Rose added.
"I have to go. I need to be there for Miranda. I'm her best friend. This is the second person she's lost because of me."
"She hasn't lost anyone because of you. You didn't swing the sword that killed them; therefore it wasn't your fault." Tia said.
"Do you know who killed Lee?"
"Yes." Tia answered.
"Who?"
"Ulquiorra."
I didn't say anything. I just stopped eating and looked down. Tia put a hand on my shoulder.
"I thought that knowing who did it would put me at ease about it."
"Do you want us to go with you to his funeral?" Tia asked.
"No, I don't think that's necessary."
Tia stood up. "If you change your mind, you know where to find us." She bowed. "If you don't mind, I have some things I need to do, Kristen-sama."
"Oh, it's ok. Do as you please."
"Thank you." She bowed again and then took her leave along with her fracción.
I happened to grab a pregnancy book from the house when we visited. I was reading up about what to expect in the 1st trimester, as I skipped it with Raina. I was assuming I was about 6 days pregnant right now. I wouldn't know for sure until I saw a doctor about it, but I was pretty sure I was right. My intuition doesn't fail me too often. I guess it has to do with the fact that I can see the future.
"Hey dere." I heard an ever familiar voice say. It was Gin. "Dis seat taken?"
"Of course not."
He smiled and sat down. "Whatcha doin?"
"Nothing really. Just wasting time, waiting for Raina to wake up from her nap. Sorry about last night, I fell asleep waiting on you."
"It's ok. I had a lot ta do and was pretty tired afterward."
"You don't think that Sosuke knows about us, do you? I mean, maybe he was keeping you busy so we couldn't spend any time together."
"Nah, nah. He doesn't know. Yer readin way too much inta stuff. Some things aren't as difficult as ya make em out ta be."
"Hey." I pushed him playfully.
"If ya make me spill dis on myself, yer in trouble." He said, referring to his food.
"Is that so?"
"Yup."
"I'm real scared."
"Ya should be." He joked.
"I'm shaking in my boots."
"Good, cuz I'm a scary guy. Ya never know what I'm gonna do next."
I laughed, because I didn't find him scary at all. He just smiled and then continued to eat. I looked around to make sure no one was looking. When I knew they weren't, I put my hand under the table and began to rub Gin's thigh.
"Hey now. Ya really shouldn't be doin dat. We're in public. Don't want anyone ta catch us, do ya?" He asked.
"I guess not. I'm just tired of waiting." I said as I brought my hand back up to the table.
"I know da feeling. Look, I got some time after I get done eating if ya wanna go back ta my room." He grinned.
"You know I do."
He finished up eating and then we headed for his room. When we got inside his bedroom, I started taking my clothes off.
"Someone's in a hurry." He joked.
"I'm just ready to be close to you. I miss feeling your skin against mine."
He smiled and began taking his clothes off. When he got them off, he pulled me close to him.
"Dat better?" he asked.
"Much better." I smiled.
He pulled me in for kiss and then we made love. It was amazing, as usual. Soul Reapers apparently make the best lovers. It's all those years of experience, I suppose. After we were finished, we laid in the bed.
"I want to make your world better than it's ever been." I said.
"Heh, maybe you will, even though I don't deserve it."
I sat up and looked at him. "I don't care whether you think you deserve it or not, you're still getting it. So just accept it."
"I think I'm beginning to."
"Good."
He got up and started to put his clothes back on.
"Gin?"
"Huh?"
"Are you hiding something from me?"
"Why do ya ask?"
"Unmei said you were."
Because he is.
"And how would she know?"
"Well, umm, you see…." He cut me off.
"I get it. She's been in my head? Well tell her ta stay out. It's none of her business."
None of my business? If he's going to be around you, I think it is.
"What about mine?"
"I've told ya before, I hide things from everyone. It's not something ya need ta worry about. Ignorance is bliss, ya know."
"That's what they say."
"Ever thought dey might be right?"
"Maybe they are."
"Well, I better leave. Don't want anyone ta think anything is going on with both of us missing and all."
"Yea…"
"Before I leave, you don't pry 'round in my head, do ya?"
"No, I don't."
"It's nice ta know yer not as nosey as Unmei." He left before I could respond.
That never gets old, does it? Unmei joked about him leaving before I could answer.
"Heh." I got up and began putting my clothes on.
I wonder exactly what his intentions are.
"I'm sure they're not bad."
How can you be sure? You don't know what he's hiding. I don't see how you trust him.
"Well, he didn't lie about it. That says something, don't you think? He said not to worry about it, so I'm not."
If I told you not to worry, it wouldn't change a thing. But he says don't worry and everything is fine. Unmei grumbled.
"He's not a bad guy, Unmei. I just can't force myself to believe that he is. So until he gives me a reason not to, I'm just going to continue trusting him and loving him."
Whatever. I'm going to continue being suspicious.
"And you have that right. But know that he's going to be around, so you better just get used to it. I am having his baby, you know."
Don't remind me.
I left Gin's room and went back to Sosuke's. I got there right before Raina woke up. It was perfect timing. I fed her and played with her a while. Then decided I should probably go bring Szayel back. It wasn't going to happen by itself. I was well rested and feeling really good, especially after my time with Gin. Now was as good of time as any to do it. I left Raina with Ha Kaze, knowing that I shouldn't be gone all too long.
I don't why you are doing this.
"Because I want too."
You're being stupid, you know? You can't do this. Do you realize how hard this is going to be? Just because you have access to her powers, doesn't mean you should use them. They weren't meant for you. You can't handle them.
"I've used them before and everything turned out fine. Looks like I can handle them. I'm not as weak as you think."
I don't think you're weak. The things you have used her powers for were little things. You have never tried to create a body out of thin air and then give life to it! And it's not just any life, a life that has already been destroyed. You have to find the soul of someone who has been killed and then bring it back to this body that you've created. That is going to take a lot of power, power that you can't handle!
"See, you do think I'm weak. And so does Sosuke. You're the strong part of me, the powerful part. That's how everyone sees it. I want to show that I am strong too! I can handle it and I will do it."
Nel came up to me as I was discussing this with Unmei while I walked down the hallway.
"I need to talk to you." She said.
"It will have to wait." I said as I walked past her.
She grabbed my arm, but not tight and I turned around. She looked around and then spoke softly. "It's about Ichigo."
My eyes widened.
"You know him, don't you?" She asked, still speaking softly.
"Uh, yea. Umm, why don't you wait for me in my old room and we will talk about him when I get back." I said, noticing that we were in the same hallway as my old room.
I led her to the room, unlocked the door and showed her inside. "Wait here. I'll be back shortly."
"Ok." She said, sitting down on the couch.
"Just make yourself at home." I said and then left.
I wonder what she wants to know about Ichigo.
"Your guess is as good as mine."
I went to get Sosuke and he took to where he wanted me to bring Szayel back at.
"I didn't know if you needed a body. If you do, I can get you one." He said.
"No, I can make my own."
I wish you wouldn't do this, but if you're going to then you could have at least took him up on that offer.
"No, I'm doing this. I'm strong enough to."
"I never said you weren't." Sosuke said.
"Oh I wasn't talking to you."
"Unmei? She doesn't think you can do it?"
He needs to butt out.
"She doesn't think I can handle all the power it will take to do it. Do you?"
"I wouldn't have asked you to do it if I didn't think you were strong enough to."
"So you don't think I'm weak without her?"
"Of course not. I prefer you without her, actually."
That doesn't surprise me one bit. Too bad I'm not going anywhere.
"Really? You think I'm strong without her?"
"Indeed and I know you can do this, without her."
"I'm glad someone around here has faith in me."
"You don't need her as much as you think you do. You're quite capable yourself. That is why I've been pushing you two to have separate bodies. You wouldn't have to listen to her tell you that you can't do certain things then."
Don't let him manipulate you, Kristen. Don't listen to him. We do need each other. And I do have faith in you. I'm just worried, that's all.
He put his hand on my face. "Just say the word and I can make it happen."
I was about to open my mouth when Unmei stepped out of my body and practically pushed Sosuke away from me. "Just what the hell do you think you're doing?"
"Looks like I made someone angry." He said.
"Angry isn't the word!" She turned to me. "Do you not see how he's trying to manipulate you?"
"I was doing nothing of the sort. I was simply just trying to see to it that she be happy. That's all I want for her." He explained.
"Bullshit! You're trying to separate us, that way you can have her all to yourself and you can make her see things the way you do, use her to get to the nexus or to Raina!" Unmei shouted.
"Is that what you think?" He asked.
"It's what I know." She clenched her teeth.
He smirked. "Are you jealous of the relationship I have with her?"
"What? Why in the world would you ask a question like that?" She asked.
"That wasn't an answer." He said.
Unmei kind of froze. That was the first time I had ever seen her react this way. She always had an answer.
"Well, what is it?" Sosuke asked.
"I don't have to answer that question. It's completely irrelevant." She said, calm now.
"Is it? Or do you just not want to admit your true feelings?" He asked.
"What is he talking about, Unmei?"
"He doesn't know what he's talking about." She answered through her teeth.
"Don't I? You're very hard to understand Unmei, but I think I'm beginning to understand how you feel. Well your feelings for at least one person." He said.
She materialized her sword and pointed it at his throat. "Shut. Up. She came here to do something for you, so let's just get this over with and stop talking nonsense."
He smiled slightly. "Kristen, whenever you're ready."
Unmei sat down and folded her arms. She was pissed. It was so obvious. Unlike me, her emotions didn't rule over her powers. She could keep them from going crazy when she was moody. She had control, well when he came to her powers she did.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. My hands began to glow in the really white light. I wasn't exactly sure what I was doing, but I was going to do it. I thought about Szayel and what he looked liked. I kept that image in my mind. I put my hand over the table that was in front of me and his head started to form. I moved my hand down the table as the rest of him body formed, about halfway I started to get dizzy and lightheaded. I held to the table with my free hand, so I wouldn't fall. I was going to finish this. I was so weak by the time I got done making his body. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to bring his soul into it. My vision was starting to get blurry and I let go of the table. I didn't hit the floor. Unmei caught me. She must have known what going through my head. Unmei used her powers to call the chair over to where we were. She lifted me up into the chair. Sosuke was right next to me.
"I..I..n-need to f-finish."
Sosuke stroked my hair. "No, you almost passed out. You should rest."
"I'm fine." I said weakly.
"I don't want you to strain yourself. You need to stay well, especially for our child."
"I'll finish it." Unmei said coldly.
She walked over to Szayel lifeless body and waved her hand in front of his face. He coughed a little, opened his eyes and sat up.
"Lord Aizen? How am I.." Szayel started to say, but Unmei interrupted him.
"Yes, you're alive. How? Because we're good like that. Now leave." She said in a monotone voice.
Szayel got off the table and looked at Unmei. "What are you? I've never felt spiritual pressure like yours before." He pointed to me. "Hers was always a bit different, but nothing like yours. I would like permission to take her back to my lab Lord Aizen."
Suddenly Szayel was slung against the wall. The wall actually cracked around him because the force was so hard. Unmei had her hand held out, holding him against the wall with her telekinesis. "You will not experiment on me or her! If you even so much as think about it again, I'm sending you right back to where I got you from and you won't be brought back again. I can assure you that." She lowered her hand and he fell to the floor.
Szayel picked himself up off the floor. "Lord Aizen, if I may, I'd like to go to my lab."
"You're free to do as you wish." Sosuke said and Szayel took his leave. "Now, I'm going to take you back to my room. I want you to lie down."
"Ok."
"Can you walk?" He asked.
"I don't know."
"Fine. I'll carry you then."
"No, I can try to walk."
"Nonsense. You're too weak. You brought Szayel back for me. Let me do this for you." He said before picking me up.
As we walked down the hall, I could still tell Unmei was mad. I wondered what Sosuke was talking about earlier. He knows how she feels about someone and that's what's making her mad. I wonder who it is. I mean she really doesn't like most people. Although he never said they were good feelings. She obviously doesn't want it out in the open whatever it is.
Sosuke took me right to the bed when we got to his room. Ha Kaze handed Raina to me.
"If you need me to stay here with you, I will." He said.
Unmei mumbled to herself. I couldn't tell what she was saying, but I'm sure it wasn't anything nice. Sosuke just ignored her.
"No, you go do whatever you need to. I'm going to be fine. I have Raina and Unmei here with me."
"If you're sure then I'll be on my way." He walked toward the door but stopped when he got to Unmei. "I think you and I should learn to get along. You're going to be in her life and I have every intention on staying in her life."
Unmei just walked away from him without saying a word. Sosuke left and Unmei came to sit on the bed.
"Are you ok?" She asked me.
"Yes. I'm feeling better now."
"Good."
"So maybe you were right. I couldn't handle the power. I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it. Just get your rest." She looked away.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing is wrong." She said and then stepped back into my body.
I laid down with Raina and wonder what was wrong with Unmei. She was acting different. What did Sosuke know?
