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Chapter 50 TNB
They'd been dating just over a month now and it was getting impossible to avoid the touching rules. Still, Damon was more and more confident that what Stefan was feeling was real fully now, as their dates were mixtures of events encompassing all parts of who they were. Stefan's first date for Damon, involved compelling a few people to allow them to have a go at drag racing. He knew Damon loved his cars fast and furious and so they had dove in and managed not to cause too much trouble to the cars…well, nothing they couldn't afford to fix. Damon took him to clubs where they danced and kissed publically, just like Stefan wanted. They tried to spend some time in both homes – still sleeping in separate rooms though.
Elena and Caroline had come home to visit and couldn't believe their eyes…again, but their response was a little different from before. Now they could see that Stefan was of sound and complete mind and he wasn't being used or manipulated. Damon's feelings had been made clear to them since Stefan had began to remember, so they knew he'd forever be changed.
"And you're sure?" Caroline sat with him one night when Damon had gone back to his apartment. "Before, you weren't still his brother in your head and now…"
"I know. It's been hard to deal with." He nodded in admittance. "I tried to fight it. Hard. There's just so much drawing me back to him though Care."
"Do you think that maybe it's just his companionship that you're craving maybe? I mean you lived here and saw each other every day. Maybe the fact that you don't see him as much now is making you feel like this." She reasoned and he smiled at her and held her hands.
"Caroline Forbes, thank you for being such a good friend."
"Have to try." She sighed.
"It's more than that. I'm not saying that this would have happened in a million years normally. There wouldn't have been a chance in hell of that, but what happened to me in that safe…changed everything forever. It still scares me, just how much about how I feel, what I can do and what I want, has changed because of that, but it has and I can't fight it. This is me now and Damon is better. He is so changed. Maybe that's why this is easier."
She nodded.
"You really loved him, I mean like…really loved him. You proposed to him like twice Stefan." She gave a chuckle and he smirked and nodded. "You were so young and happy. Is it the same kind of feeling now?"
"No. I mean, I remember feeling it that way, but it's almost like I'm helping him grow into something else as he's helping me become whole again. Having two lives thrown together in my head hurts still sometimes. He just seems to know how to get me to let both parts merge when we're together."
"So you've been dating to make sure…before you..?" She raised an eyebrow and he huffed in jest and shook his head.
"Propose again?"
"I thought that was where this was going to go." She admitted and he gazed into the fire as he thought about that. "Have you talked about it?"
"Getting married?" He frowned.
"Getting more serious. I mean I know that you have been, but you haven't been since you were you again – have you?"
"We've been dating." He said simply.
"Not having sex?"
"No." He blushed and she huffed in genuine surprise.
"Wow."
"We wanted to be sure. I mean, he wanted me to be sure. He wants us to make love here, so that he knows it's real." He explained and she sat back in her chair in wonder.
"Damon going without sex for…how long has it been?"
"Four weeks and six days." Stefan sighed and she giggled.
"You want him. Just do it already!"
"We tried and I panicked. I couldn't do it here!" He gestured around to their family relics and obvious signs of their genetic relation and Caroline leaned her head in her hand as she stared at him.
"You said it yourself, he's changed. You've changed. You're not the two brothers who used to live here anymore. All of this stuff is just furniture and memories of people who used to live here Stefan. Don't you want to move on and make some new ones? I mean seriously, Damon might explode any day now if he's been waiting for you that long and you…god nearly five weeks?"
"We're not animals." He chuckled and she shook her head and raised her eyebrows in disagreement. "Oh come on, it was months before Elena and I slept together, how is this that different?"
"Because she was a virgin and human and a girl and you were a stud vampire just waiting for her to be ready. Damon is a randy, bursting at the seams vampire hottie who is desperate to have you. If you want him, then just do it. God…get it out Stefan!" She laughed theatrically.
"You realise you are encouraging and condoning sensational incest and depravity right?"
"Hey, it's nothing I didn't try to stop before. I know when I'm beaten." She held her hands up and they both chuckled as they sipped their coffee in comfortable silence.
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They spent a few nights apart. Damon had gigs on with the band and Stefan was trying to secretly practise drums again. It didn't come back as easily as he'd hoped but he was getting there. He just had to relax like before. It was in his head somewhere, he just needed to access it. He wanted it to be a surprise for Damon and he'd been talking to Dave, the singer and Kenny his bassist about it for a few weeks. They'd been supportive. Truth was, they wanted him back. They enjoyed their acoustic gigs but they felt limited without him. They emailed him over recordings so that he could practise and he bought a new set of drums and hid them in the basement. His former drum kit had been unsalvageable as he'd pulled it apart when Damon and he had fought, so Damon still thought that drums would be forever out of the window.
The sex conversation still hadn't come up again and Stefan was beginning to feel it more and more. Truth was that Caroline was right. He was bursting and so was Damon. Every touch between them grew more electric and it was harder and harder to stop at holding hands and kissing. Stefan had even taken to touching himself to help release at night lately. Still, he thought it might help because he was doing it here, in their family home.
For a change their date was low key this weekend. They hadn't seen each other four days and so they wanted it to be just the two of them – no distractions or other people. Damon was tired and arrived and lay down on the couch with a sigh as Stefan poured him a bourbon.
"You ok?"
"Mmmn. Just working." Damon mumbled, closing his eyes.
"With the band?"
"No the…yeah. Christ I don't even know what I'm talking about. Come here." Damon sat up and pulled Stefan down to him, kissing him gently for a few seconds and humming. "I missed you."
"Stay here tonight huh?" Stefan prompted and Damon nodded and yawned. "I'll get you some blood."
"No it's ok, I was at Leyla's earlier. Here." He threw him a warm bag of blood and Stefan caught it and looked at him in surprise. "Not a full pint but she fed me too."
"She shouldn't have." Stefan sighed.
"She's proud of you and wants you home Stefan." Damon raised his glass and sipped his bourbon.
"Do you?" Stefan posed and Damon looked at him in surprise.
"What?"
"Do you want me to come home, permanently?"
"I thought this was your home."
"I want to be wherever you are." Stefan reached out for his hands and Damon chewed his lip. "We've been dating for ages now. I know what I want Damon."
"Stefan it's been a month."
"Nearly five weeks." Stefan ran his fingers through Damon's hair.
Damon closed his eyes and they leant together and kissed, sighing into each other's mouths. Stefan pushed him gently back down onto his back and climbed on top of him. This was the moment to prove to him he wanted this. He was sure of it now, especially after his conversation with Caroline. He began to caress him and Damon tilted into him and hummed. This was the most touching they'd done for a long time.
"What about dinner?" Damon hummed as Stefan kissed around his throat. "Do you want to eat?"
For a change they were going to eat human food as well as drinking their blood bags. It was romantic and Stefan had prepared the dining room so it could feel like a real date. Damon gasped as Stefan ripped his shirt open suddenly, making him sit up to stop him, but his fabric ripped right across to his underarms and made a loud vibrating sound. Stefan pushed him back down, his eyes burning.
"Yeah I want to eat."
"Stefan…"
"I'm starving." Stefan whispered and leaned down to nip at Damon's jeans.
Damon gasped again and grabbed his head frowning.
"This is my date Damon. My choice what we do tonight." Stefan reminded him.
"Stefan it's too soon."
"I'm hungry."
"Then eat something, don't get me all fired up!"
Stefan gave a wicked smile that made Damon's hairs stand on end and he pulled Damon's jeans open fiercely, sending the button popping across the room like the cork out of a bottle – because essentially that was what this was like. Damon needed to be popped in a serious fashion.
"Oh god!" Damon lay his head down as Stefan pushed his face into his groin and inhaled there, smelling his willingness already. "Shit! Shit!" Damon panted and Stefan pulled at his jeans to release his erection.
He began slowly, Damon groaning and clenching the cushions underneath him as he took his time licking the pre-cum from the head of his swollen manhood.
"So hungry Damon." He whispered and Damon arched into his mouth with almost a cry as Stefan swallowed his length.
This time, there was no panic, no fear. Just Damon and him. Just the taste of Damon in his mouth and pushing into him restlessly and panting. He sucked and kneaded, licked and swirled until Damon begged him to stop. He was surprised by that. Damon begging, not to be taken, but for him to stop. Was Damon panicking now? He pulled up slowly, kissing his way up Damon's chest as Damon panted.
"Why do you want me to stop?" He asked and Damon looked at him, half terrified and half animal.
"Is this going to happen?" He struggled to ask and Stefan nodded. "Stefan, are you sure?"
"Yes." Stefan said reassuringly and Damon sat up, forcing him to sit back too as Damon held his erection and squeezed it, trying to calm it down.
Stefan frowned confused.
"What's wrong?"
"I thought, we might have more time." Damon struggled and Stefan stared at him waiting for an explanation. "There's something I have to tell you."
Stefan suddenly felt very nervous and cold. Why was Damon looking at him like that?
"You've changed your mind?"
"No!" Damon said immediately and grabbed at his jeans, pulling them up and trying to hold them together without his button and Stefan sat, pale and shaking as he waited.
"Damon..."
"I thought you wouldn't be able to do this for another little while. I thought I had more time to prepare."
"Prepare for me to be yours completely?"
"No. Shit." Damon put his head in his hands and groaned. "I wanted it to be right."
"What are you talking about?" Stefan said vexed and Damon looked up at him.
"I lied."
"What?"
"I lied to you about what I've been doing."
"What?" Stefan frowned.
"I haven't been helping the band, I've been meeting someone."
"Meeting someone?" Stefan's heart stopped.
"He's been trying to…"
"What are you talking about?!" Stefan shouted, full of emotion and instant jealousy and Damon searched his face horrified for a second as he realised what Stefan was thinking.
"No, no, I'm such an idiot!" He cried and pulled Stefan closer, but Stefan pushed him back. "Stefan, he's a…"
"What? A drag racer? A pilot? A drummer? Who?" Stefan panted and Damon shook his head in dismay.
"He's an estate agent." Damon blurted out and Stefan panted and frowned. "The estate agent."
"Who?" Stefan croaked.
"I never knew whether you would ever love me like that again or want those same things as we did, when we'd planned. I…wanted to see how long I could wait and see, but there were other buyers and he was calling me…I had to make a decision without you."
Stefan breathed as he watched Damon face full of worry and regret as it all finally clicked.
"The house we wanted."
Damon nodded.
"That's why you sold some of our land?"
Damon nodded again.
"But, it wouldn't have been enough, even with that!" Stefan frowned and Damon sighed and looked down at his hands. "How did you get the rest of the money?"
Damon was strangely silent and it worried Stefan even more.
"Damon what did you do?"
"I sold everything." He said.
"What?!" Stefan gasped. "You sold the Boarding House?"
"No! I'd never sell it!" He said in horror and a sadness filled his eyes as Stefan waited to hear the rest.
"Did you kill someone? Compel someone?"
"I sold all the cars. All of them." Damon looked at him, his eyes filling with tears. "It took all of them to make the rest of the money up."
Stefan blinked at him as Damon huffed in remorse and shook his head.
"Stefan I'm so sorry. I know how much you loved them. I thought maybe I could buy them back one at a time before you were ready to come live with me."
"Why are you so upset?"
"They were your cars." Damon said, croaking and Stefan gave a small shake of his head.
"Half of them were broken. I abandoned their restoration. Who bought them from you in that state?" Stefan asked and Damon gave a weak smile and lay down on the sofa again tired as Stefan thought it all through.
"Wait. Some of those cars you couldn't have sold Damon. Not unless you paid someone to restore them. Who?"
Damon rubbed his eyes and Stefan caught a glimpse of grease on his elbow.
"It was you." He whispered in disbelief. "You restored all of those cars for me and sold them?"
Damon nodded and closed his eyes.
"Oh my god." Stefan huffed.
"I'm sorry. I had no right. I thought I could buy them back…"
"I love you." Stefan said and Damon frowned and looked down at him confused. "You did all of that for me? Because I loved that house. I wanted it to be our home and then when I remembered all of my past, I forgot."
"You loved them like your children."
"Not as much as I love you. We can buy other cars." Stefan said gently and Damon sat up and looked to him hopefully. "The house is ours?"
"Yes, but it needs work. I've been trying to make it look like you wanted."
"How long has this been going on?"
Damon swallowed.
"How long?"
"Since Bon Jovi. When I realised that I'd freaked and hurt you I wanted to show you how much it didn't matter. When I left you on the roadside I went back to the estate agent and offered him some of our land. He took it there and then provisionally."
"Provisionally?"
"In principle, but then, you got that witch involved and all hell broke loose and I…I didn't know what to do. You hated me so much."
"But you still wanted the house? Even without me?"
"No, but if I could imagine that you'd have been there, happy…I knew that was where you wanted to be and I had to have that piece of you, of what we might have had, so I kept the agreement in principle."
"What changed?"
"You did and I started to wonder whether you'd ever feel for me again. I wanted to wait until I knew if you could, because you were so angry about me selling the land here. If I couldn't have any relationship with you at all, then I should just move on and take the land back and give to you again."
"The dating. That's why you wanted to date too. To give you time to know whether you should keep it." Stefan rubbed his face, full of emotion.
"Then other buyers started showing up because of the wait but I couldn't rush you. I wanted to know what you really wanted. So I had to bid and the bidding meant I had to sell everything I could."
"All the cars." Stefan nodded and Damon gave a weak smile. "Just the cars?"
"It doesn't matter." Damon shook his head and Stefan reached over and grabbed him.
"What else?"
"My things."
"What?" Stefan frowned.
"I've collected things through the years, just like you have brother. Things that some people feel are valuable now. So I hawked everything."
"You sold all of your things?" Stefan frowned in pain for him and Damon shrugged. "For me?"
"They weren't as important as you, even if you weren't ready yet." Damon sighed and Stefan brought their foreheads together as he shed some tears.
"They were all just things. We can buy new things together." Stefan consoled, kissing Damon's forehead as he ran through a list in his mind of all of the precious items that Damon had prized and taken with him to that apartment.
His original copy of Gone with the Wind – his favourite book. He'd queued for it for hours when he'd bought it to get it signed by the author Margaret Mitchell. It must have been worth a fortune now. Damon loved his books and he usually always got them autographed. He cared for them as though they were jewels and he'd sold them all.
"Oh god, I can't believe you." Stefan croaked as they held each other. "So many of your beautiful things gone. Damon I will get them back for you, I promise." He held Damon's face between his hands and Damon smiled and cupped his face.
"I don't need them if I have you. I can't buy you."
"I think you just did." Stefan gave a tear stained chuckle and they kissed and nuzzled each other until they lay down on the sofa again.
"Do you want to marry me?" Stefan whispered and Damon stroked through his hair and sighed.
"Not yet."
"Why?"
"Because you don't mean it yet. I can wait."
Stefan closed his eyes and buried his face in Damon's shoulder as they gently fell asleep.
Stefan woke up a few hours later to the smell of food and he jumped up in surprise. Damon was gone.
"Damon?" He called and heard Damon hum from the dining room.
He walked through just as Damon was placing their food down with a glass of blood to go. They smiled at each other and sat down.
"What about the apartment?" Stefan asked as he enjoyed the food he'd prepared but abandoned prior to Damon cooking it.
"I had to let it go last week. I needed the extra cash."
Stefan stopped eating.
"You let it go? Then where have you been staying?"
"In the Camaro, Leyla is holding the rest of your things." Damon shrugged and Stefan sighed. "It's bigger than it looks."
"I've heard you say that before." Stefan joked and they both chuckled and continued to eat.
"When can we move in?"
Damon coughed and took a sip of wine.
"What?" Stefan frowned.
"Not till you're ready. Just because I've proved my undying love for you by selling my entire life doesn't mean I expect you to up and drop everything in yours. I can work on the place a while."
"I'm not a precious flower Damon." Stefan pointed at him with a fork. "And I'm tired of wanting you every night. I'm coming with you tomorrow."
"There's no bed Stefan, no furniture…"
"Then we bring it from here."
"And what about here? You can't just empty the place."
"Why not? Let's just sell it." Stefan put another mouthful of food in his mouth and Damon stared at him.
Stefan was aware that Damon was gobsmacked and not eating and he cleared his throat.
"It's never been home since you left. I don't want it without you."
Damon started eating again as he glowed inside. This was really happening. Stefan was committing.
They ate and joked until they were full and relaxed and returned to the lounge. Stefan looked towards the sofa and grinned at Damon.
"What?" Damon chuckled.
"Time to consummate this Damon. I'm going to die if we don't."
Damon laughed hard and hugged him, kissing his cheeks and nose.
"You don't have to prove anything to me on an old sofa that countless corpses have lain on and we've had to have washed."
"Please, I want you. Kissing isn't enough anymore. Besides, you've just bought us a house."
"I want you too." Damon whispered and Stefan pulled their groins together.
"Then have me in my bed." Stefan purred.
"No, in mine."
"Why?"
"You think I'm leaving that bed? It's coming with and if we are christening any furniture it'll be the biggest bed in the land." Damon purred and kissed his jaw and Stefan nodded.
"Deal."
