Disclaimer – ½ Prince and all of the characters—aside from my OC's—belong to Yu Wo
My eyes drifted between the frightened Jiao and her bold boyfriend, who was wearing a competitive expression. As if he was actually my competition. As if we were competing in the first place. After all, this was far from a contest.
Taking a slow breath, I sipped at my tea, then continued to stare at them. "So, you two are dating," I murmured, smiling politely. "May I ask for how long?"
"Four years," Jiao replied quietly. Her wide eyes seemed to be glued to the wood grains on the tabletop between us. The pieces of my father in me were telling me to force her to look at me when we were speaking to one another, the way I had been taught never to look away, but I managed to keep the shaking control I had on my temper.
My courteous smile stretched wider. "Such a long time. You two must be very serious about one another."
"Of course we are," Quon growled.
"Well then, that certainly changes everything," I added with a small nod, taking another calm drink of tea. Both of the faces across from me suddenly took on a hopeful turn. My fake smile vanished at once as my anger snapped to the surface. "Did you really think that was what I would say?"
Heng mumbled, "Oh, good grief, Al," and shook his head, carefully looking in the other direction as he tore apart a bit of the crust on one of his sandwiches.
"Did you both think you could suddenly spring all of this on me and expect me to be understanding?" I demanded. "Four years? Well, Jiao and I have been engaged for nearly seven. I was here first, thank you very much!"
"Engaged on paper," Quon corrected in a superior tone. "You only just met a few months ago, so that means I was here first. Don't treat her like your possession when you didn't even care enough to see her after–"
"Do not talk to me in such a pretentious way," I interrupted, scowling in irritation at him.
"How the hell am I being pretentious‽" he demanded. "It's the truth! Even if you try to cover it up to defend yourself!"
"I am not covering up anything. You know nothing about my side of this, so do not assume that you do. I did not meet her because my father said it was not necessary to do so. His word is final, thus I did not.
"And also, I would greatly appreciate it if you did not say that I am treating Jiao as my possession. If I had the ridiculous notion that I owned her, I would have dragged her away at once without generously allowing you both a chance to explain yourselves. Now please tell me why my fiancée has a boyfriend when she already has me."
Allowing them time to sort themselves out, I leaned back against the cushioned booth and busied myself with my tea again, giving them both expectant glances. Heng, looking uncomfortable over having to be a spectator to the situation, let out a tiny sigh and prodded the top of one of his sandwiches. Several minutes went by in silence.
Finally, Jiao spoke. "When your father approached my parents with the marriage proposal…at the time I had no reason to turn you down; I was very excited about the idea of getting married; my parents supported the engagement, and I wanted to make them happy; and although I know it sounds stupid, I was also a bit jealous of Dàsăo…I was happy for her and Dàgē, of course, but seeing them get so close was rather annoying. I wanted to have someone like that, too. After all, it's the dream of a lot of young girls to find their 'Prince Charming' and start a family. However, that fantastical happiness faded away quickly after nothing more happened. My life went on as it always had; nothing changed and you were…easy to forget about. Quon and I were good friends and classmates at the time. And, well, a couple years after that…we started dating and have been ever since."
"So your excuse is that you forgot about me. How convenient." I stared hard at her slightly offended expression. "Why did you not cancel the engagement when you began to date him? You and I would not have had to deal with this mess if you had broken up with me years ago."
She frowned incredulously at me. "How in the world do you think I could have accomplished that? You know your father! Even if you wouldn't have minded, he would have been furious if my family had withdrawn from the agreement! I didn't want to cause problems for my parents!"
"Then you should not have cheated on me in the first place!" I snapped, slapping my hand down on the table. "Even if we never met or spoke, you should have been responsible enough to keep your promises to me, as I have for you. Marriage is not something you can just ignore whenever you do not want to see it. Every time in the past when I was posed with a prospective relationship, I always said no. Then again, except for one particular instance, I have never been interested in dating. I suppose that is where our difference lies."
"One particular instance," Jiao softly repeated, raising an eyebrow. My heart nearly stopped when her eyes darted to Heng. Thankfully, he refrained from reacting and kept his focus glued to his uneaten sandwiches. "I wouldn't have minded if you dated that person. Go ahead and date him now if you want. It's none of my business."
"I digress; it is entirely your business," I countered. "I find it insulting that you think I am the sort of person who would have a relationship on the side. This may just be an arranged marriage, but I can assure you that from the beginning I have been fully prepared to be dedicated to only you. And that does go both ways; I would much prefer if, once we are married, I am not having indirect sex with your boyfriend." When Jiao and Quon's faces reddened, I added, "Not that I am meaning to be crude, but it will happen eventually. I need an heir, after all, so there is no point in avoiding the inevitable."
Quon furiously glared at me. "If you fucking touch her, I–"
"You will what?" I coldly interrupted, returning his look with double the intensity in an attempt to intimidate him. Much to my continued annoyance, it seemed to work. "You are in no position to threaten me or even get angry. If anyone is to get angry about all of this, it should be me. So do not bother."
He gave me a humorless, sneer-like smile. My eyes dropped to his hand when Jiao pulled on it, interlocking their fingers. I honestly had no desire to make them stop holding hands, but they sent me challenging looks afterward as if they though I was going to tell them to let go.
Sighing softly, I took a moment to calm myself before I continued. "Not to anger you further," I quietly directed at Quon, "but are you two planning on breaking up now that I have arrived? Or were you going to date even after she and I are married?"
"We…" he slowly began, glancing at Jiao. After a deep breath, he looked back at me. "We talked about breaking up…a few times. But we haven't come to a decision."
"No, I do not suppose it would be a simple task to go your separate ways so abruptly after four years of being in a serious relationship," I murmured, gaze flickering between the two. After a moment of silence, I laughed. "If you chose to stay together, which I would assume you are, regardless of any talks you may have…If I had not accidentally caught you two, were you even going to tell me about this?"
Jiao pressed her lips together, teary eyes darting about her lap. "Not unless we had to," she whispered, much as I had been expecting. "I don't want to break up with him, so…keeping it a secret…I hoped…"
"How long did you think you would be able to hide it?" I challenged, fighting to keep my voice from being too sharp. "Did you think that if you were careful you two would be able to stay together forever, always skulking in the shadows? Would you really be happy like that? Love is not enough to hold your relationship together. It will never work."
"We know that," Quon said harshly with no less fury than before. However, this time there was also the beginnings of sad distress in his eyes. "We knew this would happen eventually, so stop acting like we didn't consider it at all. We've spent hours talking about what we should do. You have no idea how much Jiao has been worrying about getting caught, breaking up, marrying someone she doesn't love…hurting you."
That last bit caught me by surprise, though I wasn't really sure why. I'd always known she was a kind person, so it really wasn't so strange that she would also be worried about me. However, this whole situation had thrown me into Battle Mode and had set me off on a very long rant.
"Well," I sighed, "sooner or later someone or something would have been your wake up call. It just so happened to be me." I drank the rest of my tea, then stood and picked up my bag. "I must ask that you two have another talk. I hope your decision is the correct one."
Quon leapt to his feet, giving me a desperate stare. "Wait. Don't…" He gritted his teeth and dropped his gaze to the tabletop, looking much more submissive than he had earlier. Hints of tears started gathering on his eyelids. "Please…don't take her away from me," he whispered.
Frowning in annoyance, I slipped my bag onto my shoulder and said flatly, "If you do not want me to take her away from you, you take her away from me. It is as simple as that. I assume you are up to the challenge."
Jiao suddenly glared at me. "Don't treat me like a prize, Zian."
"I am not," I returned, feeling a bit offended. "I am asking him to prove that he is the better husband. If he cannot then I am going to marry you as my father has ordered."
"Why do I have to prove it to you?" he murmured icily.
"And why would you do that?" They both looked rather confused, so I sat down again and sighed in exasperation. "Why the hell do I even have to explain this…I am not the one to whom you need to prove yourselves. It is our parents who made this decision in the first place. I had no say in the matter, thus it would be completely pointless to give me proof that you two should be the ones marrying. Although I would also like to hear it, as it would give me peace of mind that Jiao would be in good hands. I do not love her, but I do care for her as family, of course, so I would not readily agree to hand her over to a bumbling idiot." I glanced toward Quon and added, "Not that I think you are a bumbling idiot. If Jiao has stuck with you for this long then I assume that you do have your good qualities."
Quon's eyes went very wide and he sat down with a loud thud.
"You're…not trying to break us up?" Jiao carefully asked, as if she couldn't believe what I'd just said.
I gave her a tired look. "Is your opinion of me really so low that you think I would purposefully make you miserable? I am not going to force you to marry me, especially not when we have other options from which we can choose."
She broke out into a bright smile, then took Quon's hand again and squeezed it when I finished.
Heng suddenly started giggling. "Al, you are the most misleading person in the whole world."
Feeling confused, I gave him a glance. "How am I misleading? I was completely candid."
"You looked so angry," he explained, smiling in bemusement. "Wear a scary face like that and anyone would think that you were trying to break them up."
"Of course I'm angry. I have every right to be angry. Not about their relationship, but that they hid it from me. And also that you, Jiao, apparently still think I'm a monstrous person like my father, regardless of how many times and ways I've tried to show you that I'm not. I've been living with your family for several months, yet you still misunderstand me."
"No, Zian," she assured, an anxious look on her face, "I honestly don't think that. I know you're not like him. I'm sorry I kept it from you, but I was just really worried about how you would take it…As you said earlier, it's not like I could just blurt it out and expect you to accept it." With a small sigh, she helplessly stared down at her steaming coffee. "When you and I spoke in-game before the war, I really wanted to tell you, and just get it out of the way…but I was so afraid that you wouldn't agree to canceling our engagement, and I'd lose Quon. I didn't know what to do."
"I understand your hesitancy." I tried my hardest to smile in a reassuring way, being completely empathetic to her, as I had been torn over that same thing in my want to keep Heng and I a secret from her until I was ready to reveal it. "I'm happy to have relieved you both. However," I cautioned, "this doesn't mean we definitely aren't getting married. It won't do either of you any good to be overly optimistic. I don't suppose your parents, Jiao, will be difficult to sway, assuming you two prepare yourselves well enough for giving them the news, but my father might be quite the obstacle. But don't worry, I'll do my best to convince him." I stood up again and stepped away from the table, picking up the bowl of salad I had ordered earlier but hadn't even touched until now. "We'll leave you two to your lunch. It was nice to meet you, Quon, in many ways."
"Oh," he breathed, "yeah…um." He suddenly jumped to his feet again and gave me a polite bow as he smiled brightly, looking like an entirely different person than the one he'd been a few minutes before. "It's nice to meet you, too." I gave him a hesitant smile in return. Although the complete turn-around bewildered me, it was somewhat relieving to know that I had put his fears at ease at last. Heng and I had only been secret friends for a few months. I couldn't imagine what Quon and Jiao had gone through for four entire years, hiding their relationship from everyone.
Heng quickly grabbed his uneaten sandwiches, stood up, and followed me while I slowly walked away. "Zian!" Jiao jumped up out of her seat. I paused and glanced at her over my shoulder. "Thank you…"
Laughing faintly, I continued on my way, waving my hand. "You're welcome."
After Heng and I put our food into take-out boxes and paid, we left the café and went back to Heng's car. With a deep sigh, I settled against the dark gray, sun-warmed fabric of the seat and closed my eyes. Other than the sound of Heng's door shutting, silence hung over us. "Well?" I murmured after a pause. "Are you not going to say it?"
There was a small rustling noise. "Say what?"
"'I told you so,'" I slowly explained, smiling grimly.
"Oh, that." He let out a faint chuckle. "…No. Wouldn't wanna make you even more mad."
"It sounded so absurd to me last weekend when you brought up this scenario…Jiao cheating on me…" Rubbing my forehead, I sighed again. "You certainly do know better than I how people work."
"Not everyone is as honest and obsessively devoted to their responsibilities as you are," he quietly pointed out. "You shouldn't assume people are going to do everything the way you do."
"I suppose not." I cracked one open eye and glanced at Heng. He looked insufferably ecstatic. "Why are you so happy?" I inquired, turning away from him to stare out the window. Now that we were out of Jiao's sight, I fell into my gloom, deciding to let her wallow in her joy for a while longer before bringing up the negative side to all of this.
"Because!" Heng exclaimed, nearly cheering as he laughed. "This means you might not have to get married! Of course I'd be happy about that, stupid! It's so relieving." I felt his hand touch the back of my head.
I swatted it away and irritably looked at him. "This is nothing to be happy about."
His eyes widened at the news. Slowly taking his hand back, he settled down in his seat and stared at me, looking confused. "…But…But I thought you wouldn't mind if she marries someone else. She even said she doesn't care if we date. W-why aren't you also getting happy?"
"The fact that she might be getting married to someone else doesn't mean things between you and I are allowed to change."
"Why not?" He still looked just as perplexed.
Briefly glaring at him, I went back to staring out the glass of the car window. "Isn't it completely obvious?" I muttered. Why did these things never occur to him? Especially since he was so people-smart?
"If it was, I wouldn't be asking!" he snapped, rocking the car a little when he angrily rearranged himself in his seat. "I've told you tons of times, I can't read your mind. I can hardly ever predict what you're thinking in that weird brain of yours."
"Well, you are the one who strives to understand me. Give it some thought. It should come to you eventually."
At my challenge, he fell silent for several minutes. I continued to look out the window, watching streams of people mill up and down the concrete sidewalks, obliviously passing us by. "Give me a hint?" he finally asked, sounding somewhat meeker than before.
"My father."
"What's he got to do with this? You don't live with him, so you can do whatever you want now."
"Wrong," I murmured. He let out a long sigh, then went quiet again. Turning myself about, I rested my left side against the seat and stared at his concentrated profile. "My father is a very easy person to understand, even for people who don't know him very well, so I'm sure it will not be difficult at all for you. He sees everything as either useful or not useful. So think about things this way; what is the thing he values most?"
Heng's eyebrows lowered and he slowly answered, "His…company? I guess."
"Exactly," I affirmed. "So what does he want most?"
"Anything that benefits the company?"
"Yes. So," I continued, "knowing that the Lin family won't go back on the business partnership, even if I'm not marrying their daughter, what do you think my father will do when his obedient tool of a son conveniently becomes single again?"
After another thoughtful pause, Heng's mouth dropped open in shock. "He wouldn't!" he suddenly yelled, turning to face me. "You think he'll marry you off to someone else for another business deal‽"
"Ah, you've got it." Smiling humorlessly at his revelation, I buckled my seatbelt. "My father, Jiao, and Quon are the ones who have benefited from this. You and I, on the other hand, have made no progress at all. In fact, our situation is even worse than it was before. Without my engagement to Jiao, my father will see no point in my living with her family. I'll have to go back home, assuming he agrees to this, which I'm positive that he will. Also, given that he creepily seems to know everything I do, he most likely knows I've been seeing you behind his back, so he will probably keep a closer watch on me than before, which means no more Second Life…and no more meetings between you and I unless we're very clever."
Agreeing to Jiao and Quon's relationship had just taken away everything precious that I had gained since last July. I was back to being my father's tool, a little clockwork man waiting to be wound up and set off on the course he'd chosen for me.
Over the span of a few seconds, Heng's face went from normal-colored, to very pale, to very red. His fist came crashing down on the steering wheel while he swore several times at the top of his lungs. Gritting his teeth, he leaned forward and buried his face in his arms.
Several things I could have said passed through my mind, but I stayed silent. I doubted anything would have been any use in easing his frustration and anger. I certainly didn't think that hearing anything positive at the moment would lift my own mood.
"One hopeful step forward and we immediately get dragged back to the start line," Heng sighed, flopping backward in the seat and tiredly staring at me. "We're like that one guy in your mythology book. What's his name? Aeolus' son…the guy who has to roll a rock up a hill over and over forever."
"Sisyphus," I supplied. Our situation did seem like his. So much struggling to go through, only to end up right back where we began.
"This is getting really annoying. In fact, it passed 'really annoying' a long, long time ago."
I inhaled and opened my mouth to say, "I'm sorry," but I knew that would probably agitate him further, so before I could say anything I closed my mouth and nodded once in agreement.
He gave me a half-smile. "You were about to apologize, weren't you?" he asked and I glanced at him in slight remorse, wordlessly apologizing for apologizing. "If there's one part of you that I can predict, it's when you're going to say sorry. Then again, it's not hard, seeing as how you think everything's always your fault. Do you even know what it is that you were gonna say sorry for?"
Feeling a bit silly, I slowly shook my head. "Maybe, maybe not."
Extending one of his hands, he played with a lock of my hair for a moment and clarified, "I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at all of the people who think they can take advantage of you just 'cause you're so tolerant. I hate it when I see people use you and there's nothing I can do to stop them. That's why you don't have to say you're sorry. You didn't do anything wrong. Except for being so passive."
"It's a conditioned response, I suppose, apologizing whenever anything…goes wrong…Stop that, we're in public," I scolded, face reddening when his hand dropped to my neck and his warm fingers pressed against my skin. Why could he never keep his hands to himself? It was so bothersome.
Mostly because I liked it so much.
"Why? Jiao already said she doesn't care," he reminded softly. "How come you let everyone but me do whatever they want?"
"Because whatever you do usually involves me," I grumbled, pushing his hand away and shrinking against the car door in a futile attempt to remain out of reach. "And just because Jiao said she doesn't care doesn't mean that I don't care. I'm still engaged to her, thus I have no plans whatsoever on getting involved with you."
"We're already involved, stupid," he huffed, then turned to finally buckle his seat belt and start the car. "I dunno whether I want to be impressed by your dedication, or to be irritated by how this all sounds like it's about protecting your integrity."
He pulled the car out of the parking lot and I fixed my eyes on the road, biting back all of the explanations I wanted to give him. It really wasn't about my integrity, although I supposed the reason was just as selfish. I honestly did want to give in and just be with him for as long as I could, but I knew I would only miss him a million times more once I had to leave—if I could leave him at that point. I didn't want to start anything with him unless I could be his completely. Being in a half-hearted relationship like that wasn't fair to him. But all of that would only spark more debates, so I let him keep to his own assumptions.
After a short drive, we arrived at the Lin house, parked outside the enormous garage, and got out. Setting my box of salad on top of the car, I stretched and leaned back, gazing blankly at the maple trees nearby. How many more times would I be able to stand out here and stare at that beautiful garden? If my father knew about Heng's visits, he would undoubtedly blame the Lin family as well as me for allowing Heng to be here. Who knew if my father would let me come back here after everything got settled. Of course, he'd let me spend time with the Lins still in order to keep up the good affiliation, just not here. After all, this place would give Heng and I a loophole for seeing one another.
Heng placed himself in front of me, gave a look around to make sure we were alone, then leaned forward. Rather than kissing me, as he had so often ever since that dinner party, he wrapped me up in his arms and hugged me. Feeling thoroughly depressed, I leaned my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, wishing he and I could run away to someplace where my father didn't exist. But that was a selfish thought I didn't seriously pursue, since Heng had his brothers to take care of. I wasn't about to ruin their lives just so I could have what I wanted.
Heng's warm hand touched the side of my face, then dragged through my hair. Heart rate accelerating, I stood as still as I could when he placed a string of kisses across my cheek and temple, his mouth coming to a rest beside my ear. My eyes went wide as he whispered, "I love you," in an earnest tone. Embarrassment quickly took place of my depression, and I buried my face in his shoulder and squeezed my eyes shut again. I thought no one would ever say that to me.
"You're blushing," Heng quietly teased, hugging me a bit tighter.
"Of course I am," I snapped, glaring at him out of the corner of my eye. "S-saying that…it's the first time anyone's…and coming from you…"
With a little smile, he murmured, "I'll say it as many times as you like, then. I love you. I love you. I love you! I love yo-o-ou!" Laughing when I started to struggle in his grip, he repeated himself over and over.
"Once was more than enough! Stop!" I pleaded. When he ignored me and kept saying it, I threatened him with the first thing I could think of. "I'll hit you!"
He finally paused and gave me an irritatingly superior smirk that just screamed, "Oh, yeah? I'd like to see you try," without him having to make one sound. Feeling very sulky at that point, I drew back my left hand. However, he grabbed it and held it tight, eyes narrowing as he leaned forward. "Don't think that I'm going to hold back anymore. Now that Jiao gave us permission, my restraints all went in the garbage."
"But–!" I started to protest.
"Date me!" he requested—or maybe ordered—as he gave me a small shake.
Face burning all the hotter, I stared in utter shock at him. A part of me had been expecting him to ask, but actually hearing it spoken aloud was entirely different. And although I'd heard those words many times before, never had they actually had any effect on me. Now I felt like running around screaming and jumping until I exploded in a huge ball of ecstatic euphoria. Having never felt like this before, I had no idea what to do with the ridiculous amounts of happiness smothering me.
Heng, probably getting impatient at the fact that I wasn't saying anything, added a "Please?" after a long stretch of silence. Taking a shaky breath, I opened my mouth to reply. However, he interrupted me. "Wait! No, don't tell me right now. You're probably gonna turn me down, and I really don't want my good mood ruined by something so horrible…Think about it for a while, okay? And tell me later."
"Heng, I can't stay–" I began, shaking my head.
"I know," he interrupted again in a whisper, a half-smile briefly flickering onto his mouth. "I'm not expecting you to be here forever, but…until then…let me be selfish a little longer."
I attempted to come up with something to say, but my mind was thrown further into the confusion whooshing through my brain when he closed the small gap between us with a kiss that was far more passionate than I'd been expecting. Every hormone in my body was screaming at me to drag him to my bedroom, but I somehow managed to force myself to stay in one spot.
Heng finally ended the torture and stepped away from me, smiling. "Think about it. Alright? I'll see you later."
"Yeah," I muttered, watching in aggravated silence while he turned, hurried back to the driver's side of the car, and climbed in. Sighing deeply and attempting to calm myself down, I grabbed my salad box and walked around the edge of the garage, waving when Heng drove past and down the driveway. Going to the front door, I slipped inside, traded my shoes for my slippers and sighed again, taking a moment to let my face cool. Once I'd sort of managed to calm down, I stepped out of the doorway and smiled into the sitting room, where Chen and Shuang were on one of the couches, reading a picture book together. "Hello."
"Hi!" they both chirped. "How did the cooking go?" Chen continued.
"It was…illuminating," I hesitantly replied, belatedly wondering if Jiao's siblings knew about Quon. I had a feeling that Chen and Mei Rong did, but Delun was another matter. I probably should have asked before Heng and I had left the café.
"That must have been some dessert you guys made," she remarked.
"Mm…yeah." Glancing behind myself, I gave a small smile to Delun when he stomped into the room, looking rather angry about something, as usual. Without any warning, he grabbed my arm and dragged me into the hall. "Wait! My lunch!" I exclaimed, looking back at the take-out box I had dropped, but he didn't stop and pulled me up the stairs. My confusion over what he was doing didn't last long, and he yanked me into his room, slamming the door shut by throwing me against it.
"You fucking bastard," he hissed, furiously glaring as he held me in place. "You…had better have a very good explanation for what you were just doing outside with Heng."
Several seconds went by in silence as I mentally swore over and over, then I took a deep breath and fought to keep my eyes locked with his. "It's self-explanatory," I whispered. I was thoroughly terrified admitting it, and I was nowhere near ready for anyone else to find out, but it would have been pointless to try to convince him otherwise.
The rage on his face took a turn for the worst as he pulled me forward, then slammed me against the door again. "All the times you said you weren't having an affair," he continued murderously, "all the times Jiao-mèi assured me you weren't…I was finally starting to believe you both, but now…" He fell silent momentarily, then shook me, the anger on his face mixing slightly with desperation. "WHY AREN'T YOU DENYING IT LIKE BEFORE‽"
"I can't deny it."
"YOU DAMN, TWO-FACED LIAR! IS MY SISTER SO UNSATISFYING THAT YOU'VE GOT A FEW MEN AND WOMEN TO PLAY AROUND WITH ON THE SIDE‽ EVEN LONG ZHUO XIA WASN'T ENOUGH, HUH‽ EVERY TIME YOU WENT TO HENG'S HOUSE, SAYING YOU WERE JUST GOING TO HANG OUT, WHAT WERE YOU TWO DOING‽ FUCKING ONE ANOTHER‽"
Shaking my head, I grabbed his wrists and attempted to pry them off my coat front. "Delun, no–"
"SHUT UP‼" Baring his teeth, he tightened his grip on me. "I swear…I will pay you back a million times over for doing this to her."
"I am not hurting her," I quietly denied. "She knows about Heng and I…and she gave her consent."
"Oh? And I suppose you had your homo boyfriend there to gang up on her and make her agree, right? You can't possibly expect me to believe that she would be okay with this, so don't even bother trying to convince me."
My eyebrows drawing together, I stared at him in bewilderment. "Just how the hell do you see Jiao?" I questioned. "She's not a helpless little girl who needs you to protect her and lead her around by the hand! She's a twenty-year-old woman who can make her own decisions! If she disagreed with my relationship with Heng, she would have told us!"
Looking extremely offended, he slammed me against the door a third time, and the beginnings of a headache began to thud through the back of my skull. "Don't lecture me on Jiao-mèi's personality. Unlike you, I have known her for her whole life. As such, I know her far better than you ever will."
"You obviously know very little when it comes to her intimate relationships."
"What relationships?" he snapped. "She doesn't have any! Even you don't count, since your actions tell me you couldn't care less about her!"
"I do care," I retorted hotly. "And my relationship with her, while it might not be one of husband and wife, does in fact exist, and also is none of your business."
"SHE'S MY SISTER! OF COURSE IT'S MY BUSINESS IF YOU CHEAT ON HER!"
Glaring at him, I roughly shoved him backward. "What makes you think you're allowed to interfere with Jiao and I? Whatever happens between us does not involve you! Not once have I thought about coming between you and Chen-mèi when you two were having a squabble!"
"Of course not. An outsider like you has no right to involve yourself in my family's personal affairs. Don't think that you're automatically my older brother just because your father forced you on us…Can't believe my parents agreed to letting a prick like you stay here. And after they hear about how you've repaid us for being so hospitable…I can't say I'll be sorry to see you go."
His icily delivered words hit me like a punch to the gut, rendering me incapable of replying. His blatant hostility was nearly as painful as Gui Wen's had been. I knew he didn't trust me—it was obvious, and always had been—but I'd had no idea that he still thought of me as a complete stranger. All of my naïve hopes that this family was eventually going to accept me vanished, and I felt stupid for ever having thought I could have fit in here.
Slowly swallowing, I took a few deep breaths and leaned back against the door. "Well," I whispered, "be relieved, then. You will not have to put up with me for much longer, as Jiao and I have already come to the mutual agreement to break off our engagement."
"Don't you dare tell me you're breaking up with her, so you can be with a man." Delun's face was covered in disgust, which hurt me just as much as his alienating words. I had never really taken Heng's gender into consideration. I loved him for who he was, not because he had something in his pants that a woman didn't. And those feelings felt natural to me. However, I suddenly realized the harsh truth that not everyone was as tolerant and understanding as the people who had discovered Heng and I already.
I shook my head once. "Jiao was the one who wanted this, and it is not because of Heng and I."
"Then why‽"
"It is not my place to say. You will have to ask her directly." Turning, I opened the door and glanced back at him. "By the way, as I have told you many, many times, Long Zhou Xia and I are not involved, nor have we ever been, so stop groundlessly suspecting her of adultery."
"Right," he harshly agreed, "since gays aren't interested in women. No wonder you've never made a pass at Jiao-mèi…Damned pervert, get the hell out."
Anger and shame colored my face as I stepped into the hallway and whispered, "I apologize for intruding on your family's hospitality for so long. Please excuse me." Looking away, I shut the door behind myself and quickly walked toward my room—no, the guest room. Thankfully, Delun didn't chase after me to argue some more, and I reached my destination without running into anyone else. I began to undress, messily dropping my bag and clothes on the floor as I went into the bathroom.
I screwed up my face to keep myself in control, and blindly stumbled into the shower. When the hot water was spraying down on me, I leaned against the wall and tried my hardest to suppress the sobs shaking me. Although I wanted to scream, I held it inside, not wanting anyone to hear me. I squeezed my eyes shut and held my breath, feeling every bit as weak and useless as my father had always told me I was.
