Chapter 54-

May 11, 2032

6 am- Somewhere in Montana

::BANG BANG BANG::

"ow…" Jacks moans as he moves his head from the window.

::BANG BANG BANG::

"What the hell…." He groans as he looks up. The sunlight is brightly shining in on him, blinding him and making his headache worse.

"Hey! Are you alright?" He hears a voice from outside, and can't make out who is talking to him.

"HEY!" ::BANG BANG BANG::

"I would be fine if you would please stop hitting my car!" Jacks mumbles.

"What? I can't hear you! Are you alright?" :: Bang, Bang::

Jackson looks up as his eyes adjust to the light and he sees a pair of familiar eyes looking in at him. He is mesmerized for a moment, he cannot tell if its because of the beautiful girl standing outside his car, or the splitting headache from smashing his head on the window. She presses her face closer to the window. "Are you alright?" She asks slowly.

Jackson doesn't say anything. He carefully unbuckles his seatbelt, rubbing his shoulder from where the seatbelt cut into his arm, he opens the door carefully. Without saying anything to the girl, he gets out and assesses the damage to his car. "Shit." He says, seeing the scratch along side his car. "Shit shit shit! Goddamn it!" He screams as he kicks his car over and over, realizing right away that he is suffering from whiplash from the accident, he cringes as he holds his neck and leans against the car, sliding to the ground.

The girl watches the whole scene play out before her and becomes very concerned. She sits next to him, also leaning against the car. "Hey, you alright?" She asks, trying to get a good look at his face, his hair is a mess, his face is cut up and bruised.

"Can you say anything else?" Jack snaps. "No, I'm not alright! Who the hell are you?" He says grumpily.

"I'm Sam." The girl says, holding out her hand. "Sam Grossman." She says with a smile, what's your name?"

"Who cares." Jack says angrily.

"Ok, 'who cares'. I don't know if you noticed it, but you parked your car going the wrong way." She says seriously.

"You're a smart ass, Sam." Jack snapped.

"Damn straight, so, where are we going?" Sam asks, standing up, taking a good look at the car. "You must be loaded, driving around a BMW convertible. That, or its daddy's car. Wow, daddy is going to be pissed when he sees that scratch!" Sam points out, running her finger along the side of the car.

"It's not my father's car. My father's dead." Jack mumbled into his knees.

"Hmm… then maybe he won't mind so much. You almost visited daddy last night it looks like. Hey, where we going, 'who cares'?"

"I, am going away. You need to go away…" Jack said angrily.

"That doesn't make any sense. Let's go." Sam says, walking to the other side of the car. She opens the passenger side door.

"What are you doing?" Jack asks, standing up, wobbling. "Where the hell did you come from?"

"Originally? Or this morning? Originally, I'm from Boston. Born and raised! Red sox fan! You like the Red Sox?"

"No! Where did you come from this morning?" Jack asked, stumbling over to the drivers side.

"Oh. I just finished classes. I'm a freshman at Oregon State University. My mom got me plane tickets to fly home, but I decided it'd be more fun to hitchhike, you know… see the country."

"That's stupid, and dangerous."

"Actually, sleeping while driving is stupid and dangerous. Are you ready to go?" Sam asked, getting into the passenger seat and closing the door.

"Whatever. BUT I AM DROPPING YOU OFF AT THE NEXT TOWN!" Jacks yells towards her as he walks around the car to the driver's side. He gets in the car and closes the door behind him. He looks over at her and she smiles sweetly at him.

"Come on… take me for a ride, I won't bite." She says with a giggle. "Unless you ask me nicely."

"What did I get myself into!" Jack asks himself, with a sly smile on his face as he starts his car, and turns around, heading down the highway once again. This time feeling a little less alone.

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May 11, 2032-

6am- Meredith and Derek's house

Charlotte drives slowly up the long driveway, she has done so a million times, but never has she felt so alone as today. She sighs when she looks down the driveway and doesn't see his car. She checks her cell phone again, still no phone call. She dials his phone again, it rings and rings, still no answer. She flips her phone closed and throws it into her back seat. She parks the car at the top of the driveway and she walks back to the pond. To their spot. She closed her eyes as she walked down the well worn path down two bends, three rocks and past the stump shaped like a heart to the water's edge.

Charlotte opened her eyes, praying that he would be sitting there waiting for her, knowing that it wasn't going to happen. She sat on the edge of the water and looked over at the boat. 'Her' boat… 'Their' boat…sitting beside her on the bank. She sighed deeply and lay back on the cool grass, her arms extended over her head as she thought hard about the past three days. She sat up and yawned. Standing up, she approached the wooden fishing boat and pulled it out along the small pier. She put it into the water, where it was just deep enough. She tied the boat to the end of the pier and walked slowly back to the bank.

At the bank, looked around briefly and found exactly what she was looking for. She picked up the rock with two hands. She heaved it carefully to the end of the pier. Looking down into the boat, she notes again, the beautiful craftsmanship of the vessel, the love and tenderness that had been put into each and every part of the boat. She sighs deeply and looks to the sky.

"You have until this boat sinks, Jackson Shepherd. If you're not home then, you've lost both of us!" She yells loudly into the cool morning air. She gently lifts the rock down, and sets it into the boat, watching the boat go down, just slightly more into the water, by the weight of the rock. She stands up angrily and brushes herself off, staring down at the boat.

She then turns around and walks out of the woods, back to her car, where she sits down, leans over the steering wheel, and cries.

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May 11, 2032- 6 am- SGH

Katie shifted in her bed, her head moving back and forth as if in the middle of a bad dream. "Baby?" Meredith whispers as she touches her daughter's forehead. "Little girl?" Meredith whispers.

Suddenly Katie starts. Her eyes pop open in fear, but immediately soften upon seeing her mother's eyes looking down at her. "Mama…" Katie mumbled with a sleepy smile. "Mama, it was awful." She says, looking around the room. Suddenly she sits up quickly. "Matthew!" She exclaims. "Where's Matthew?" She asks panicking.

"He's ok, sweetie, he's still in ICU. He's doing alright this morning; I already went in to check on him. Your daddy is in there right now with him. If you want, I can bring you down to his room, but you have to stay in the wheelchair, no excuses." Meredith says as she holds Katie's hand.

"Ok." She whispers as Meredith helps her up out of the bed. "But what if…" Katie says, her eyes a little frightened.

"They went to a hotel last night, they are only allowed at visiting hours." Meredith assured her. "Let's go." She says as she pushes Katie from her room and down the hallway to the elevators.

When they get to the room, Meredith knocks lightly and Derek comes to the door. He opens the door for the two of them and lets them inside. "Hey sleepyhead." Katie says softly as Meredith rolls her to the bedside.

"Hey…my… little… girl…" Matthew says slowly.

Derek walks to Meredith and touches her arm. She shifts away, but pays attention. "What do you need?" Meredith said, with a slight scowl.

"We need to talk." Derek said, he turned around to watch Katie and Matthew for a second and then turned his attention back to Meredith. "Please?" He whispers. Meredith nods and they walk out into the hallway together.

Meredith turns to face him, and leans on the wall next to the door as the door closes behind them. "So what's going on with him?" Meredith asks.

"Extensive swelling in his upper and lower spinal column. It appears that fluid is starting to accumulate there, and its causing pressure on his spinal cord and nerves. If we don't fix it soon, the results could be catastrophic for him. We could straighten the spine and put a rod in his back, but its risky in his state right now. There's another surgery, but its only been successful in three incidences."

"Only three?"

"Only three. Its been attempted, by some, but it has only been successful three times. Its up to him, its their choice. But I would put a call in to Aurora to let her know that we may need her.

"Aurora?"

"Yeah. She's the only one that has done this successfully. Its time to call in the big guns." Derek whispered, a worried look crossing his face.

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May 11, 2032 - 7:00 AM- Billings, Montana-

"You're quiet." Sam said as Jack drove, his face emotionless as he pulled into the parking lot of a gas station.

"You're not." Jacks said as he parked the car. "Ok, this is your stop." Jack said as he motioned to the parking lot.

"You're dropping me off in Billings, Montana? Come on, give me a break. I've hitched rides with about five people in the past three days, and you're going to drive me an hour and that's it? Come on, where are you going anyway?" Sam complains, turning her head, leaning it on the back of the seat as she gives him a sad face.

"I don't know where I'm going, but you can't come with me." Jack said, refusing to look at her.

"Come on! If you don't know where you're going, how are you going to know when you're there?" Sam asked, seriously.

"Remember what I said before you got into my car?"

"That I'm a smart ass?"

"Yeah, well it still holds true."

"I know I'm a smart ass. PLEASE will you take me home? You said you don't have anywhere else to go! Please?" Sam begs as she gives him her best puppy eyes.

Jackson gives her a glare and stares into her dark brown eyes. He sees a little sparkle and she smiles just a little. "Fine! I'll take you as far as I can, but the minute I get sick of you, you're getting out of the car!"

"You're the best!" Sam says, reaching across, giving him a hug. Jack stiffens up under her touch. She pulls herself back for a second and looks him in the eyes. "Hey… I'm sorry. I guess I was just a little too excited, are you ok?" Sam asked as she sat back in her seat.

"No, I'm fine, I'm just… I don't know, I'm just tired, I guess." Jack said sitting back, looking out his side window, staring at the gas station.

"Oh, ok." Sam said quietly "Hey." Sam said quietly, trying to get his attention.

"What?"

"Can we drive with the top down?"

"No."

"Why not? It's a convertible! Please?" Sam begged.

"Remember what I 'just' said about getting sick of you?" Jack said, sending her a glare with a hint of a smile.

A small giggle was Sam's only response as Jack put the car in gear and they continued on their way.

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May 11, 2032- 1:00 pm-

Meredith walks towards the elevator and presses the button. The elevator doors open and reveals Derek standing there with a smarmy grin on his face. Meredith takes one look at him, scowls and turns around to walk away. Derek reaches out and grabs the back of her lab coat and pulls her into the elevator with him.

When she's in the elevator, and the door closes, she stands, staring at the doors. He attempts to put his hand on her shoulder. "Do. NOT. Touch. Me." Meredith growls.

Derek recoils his hand quickly. "Wow." He whispers to himself.

Meredith whips around and pushes him violently against the back of the elevator. "What did I tell you about talking to me? HUH? Touching me? Who the hell do you think you are? You're a self centered, arrogant, LITTLE man, who cares nothing for his own son! Do you have absolutely any idea where he is? DO YOU EVEN CARE? I can't even stand to LOOK at you!. ARGH!!!" Meredith yelled, as she turned back around and faced the doors of the elevator.

"I don't know what to say. I over reacted." Derek whispered.

"You did a little more than over react, Derek. You drove him away. Its been building for months, for YEARS, and you finally did it. Your only son hates you! I hope you're happy!" Meredith yelled, as the elevator doors opened and she stomped down the hallway.

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1pm- Somewhere in North Dakota-

"Are you going to tell me your name?" Sam asks, breaking the silence.

"No. You don't need to know my name." Jack replied, just looking out on the road.

"Yeah I do! What if I get in trouble, and I need to call you?"

"First of all, you're not going to get in trouble, second of all, don't call me. I'm a fuck up, I'd probably fuck that up too." Jack mumbles.

"Hmm…" Sam says, looking out the window. Suddenly she hears a sound. "Hey, what's that sound?" She asks, turning to Jacks.

"What sound?"

"That buzzing sound."

"Oh, it's the stupid phone." Jack said, looking over at her curious face. "Just ignore it." He said, giving her a little smile of reassurance, despite his foul mood.

"Ignore it? It's been doing that for hours." She said as she flipped open the glove compartment.

"Jesus, how old are you? I said, ignore it!" Jack says, trying to grab the phone, while trying to drive.

"Well, I'm eighteen if you MUST know… and…" She looks at the screen on the phone and starts to giggle.

"What?"

"Nothing…hehehe"

"What, just tell me!"

"Nothing…. It… just that, your phone says that 'MerBear' is calling you." She continues to giggle.

Jack looks embarrassed as he glances over at her. "Goddamn it, my stupid father reprogrammed my phone. That's my mother!" Jack says, swatting at the phone.

"Your mom's name is MerBear?" She giggles as she holds the phone farther from him.

"No, dumbass, her name is Meredith, that's my father's stupid nickname for her!" Jack says, frustrated. "Give me the phone!" He demands.

"No… Wait… your mom knows your name!" She giggles as she answers the phone. "Hi MerBear!" Sam giggles into the receiver.

"Jackson?" Meredith says on the other side.

Sam looks up at Jack with raised eyebrows and smiles. "Hmm… Jackson can't come to the phone right now, he's driving. You can talk to me if you want!" Sam giggles.

"SAM!" Jack yells as he grabs the phone out of her hand. "Sorry, Mom. I'm fine. I love you, bye." Jack says as he flips the phone shut and throws it into the back seat. Two seconds go by and it starts to ring once more. Sam giggles madly from the passenger seat, unable to catch her breath she's laughing so hard.

"That was so not funny!" Jack says seriously as Sam continues to laugh hysterically. "Sam, stop it. It's not funny!" He says, sternly again.

"Come… on… you have… to admit…" She giggles louder. "That was so freaking hysterical." She laughs louder and harder.

Jack glances at her, his face still stern. Her face is red from laughing so hard, her laugh is infectious, her eyes are smiling at him, and he can't help but smile at the laughing girl beside him. He smiles slightly, and soon he starts to laugh too.

Driving together, laughing, Jack lets her put her hand on his shoulder, as she laughs into his arm, her wiping the tears of laughter onto his shirt, and suddenly he doesn't feel as lonely anymore.

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1pm- SGH-

Meredith looks at her phone for a second and checks the number that she just called. "That's weird." She says, as she tries to dial her son's phone again. The phone goes directly to voice mail.

"What's weird?" Katie asks, looking over at her mother.

"Oh… um…"

"What? Did you get ahold of him?"

"Kind of… it was weird, someone answered, and then Jack was on the phone, said he was fine and then hung up. Does he have a friend named 'Sam'?" Meredith asked, looking completely puzzled.

"I don't think so… Maybe its some guy he met in school." Katie says.

"It was a girl." Meredith said, still confused.

"You're saying that Jack ran away with some girl?"

"I don't know what I'm saying." Meredith said as she tried to shake off the strange feeling of panic building inside of her. "Sometimes, I just don't think I know my own son." Meredith mumbled as she turned around. "I'll be right back, sweetheart." Meredith said as she walked out of Katie's room.

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Meredith walks down to the elevators and down the hallway to the elevator. She holds her breath as the doors open. She releases the breath when she steps into the empty elevator, silently thankful that it is empty. She takes the elevator to the ICU floor. She rubs her eyes tiredly as she walks down the hallway towards Matthew's room. Suddenly, she hears two men arguing angrily in a nearby office. She recognizes both voices and sighs to herself as she walks down the hallway towards the office.

"YOU WILL NOT LISTEN TO HIM! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? THERE IS NO WAY THAT YOU ARE SIGNING THOSE PAPERS!" Mark screams as he tries to grab a folder from Derek's hands.

"Stop it! They were drawn up for MATTHEW, not YOU! IT IS NOT YOUR DECISION! I HAVE TO TALK TO MEREDITH AND THEN WE'RE SIGNING THE GODDAMNED PAPERS!" Derek screamed from the other side of the desk, keeping the folder away from Mark.

"What papers?" Meredith asks tiredly from the doorway, as she walks over and grabs the folder from her red faced husband..

"Oh, hi sweetheart." Derek says as he gives Mark a smarmy look. He looks down at Meredith and she glares at him. "Sorry." He mumbles.

"These are custody papers." Meredith says as she flips through the documents. She looks up at Derek, who nods as he looks at them with her.

"Matthew wants us to sign them. He said that he won't go through with any surgeries unless he knows that the babies are well taken care of." Derek says, looking up at Mark, who's face is getting angrier by the second.

"Did he talk with Katie about this?" Meredith asks as he looks over at Mark, and then back to Derek. Derek nods.

"They both signed here." Derek says, pointing at Katie's careful scrawl and Matthew's initials. "We have to sign, and if anything happens to them, we have full custody." Derek said looking down.

Meredith looked up at him, and back to Mark and back up at Derek. She pulls a pen carefully from her lab coat pocket, signs her name in the allotted spaces and looks up at Derek again. She then puts her pen back in her pocket and walks towards the door. She turns around and glares at Derek, pointing her finger at him "You. STAY!" She says sternly as she turns around, grabs Mark's arm and pulls him out into the hallway.

She drags him down the ICU hall away from the office where Derek is.

"Meredith!" Mark exclaims as she pulls him to a corner and looks him in the eye. Mark sees the look in her eyes and doesn't say a word.

"If you think, for one second that I am going to let anything happen to either one of our children, then you have never had faith in me. Matthew… will be fine. I have one of the best neurosurgeons in the world looking over his case right now. Katie, will be fine. She is cranky, overwhelmed, and scared SHITLESS! My son… MY SON IS MISSING! He is off, gallivanting with strangers, doing GOD KNOWS WHAT in a severely depressed state. His GIRLFRIEND IS HEARTBROKEN, he hates his own father with such a passion that it makes me shudder to just think about."

"MY husband… my husband is an ASS. He kicked the shit out of his only son, for what I can only imagine was the last straw for the poor kid! You have always loved that boy. PLEASE, think of him… THINK OF HOW HE MUST FEEL RIGHT NOW! He broke his friend, Mark. He broke his friend and all he has to show for it is bruises, cuts, and a broken heart. Derek beat the shit out of the boy and he took off… He is out there, alone, guilty, probably scared out of his mind. I AM SCARED OUT OF MY MIND! I CAN'T TAKE THE FIGHTING! I CAN'T TAKE IT!" Meredith screams as she pounds on his chest, her tears over flowing as she screams.

After several seconds, she regains composure, enough to go on. "YOU…. You don't give a shit. You don't give a goddamned shit about my son, or my daughter, or my husband, or even me at this point. Right now, all you can do, is yell at Derek and act like an ASS in this hospital. ALL I ASK… Mark… ALL I ASK! Is for a little bit of GODDAMNED COMPASSION…. I want you to know… that I understand what you're going through right now, and I know that you're scared. But PLEASE…know…. Please know that I will do everything I can, to get things back to normal. Those papers don't mean shit Mark. Our children will be fine. They will be able to grow old, and live healthy lives together, with their children. So its not about the papers, Mark. Its not about the goddamned papers!" Meredith screams as she pushes his chest one more time and turns around and walks angrily back down the hall to Matt's room.

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Meredith stalks angrily down the hallway and turns into Matthew's room. She swings the door open and closes it lightly, leaning against the door for support, she wipes the tears from her eyes. She sees that Matthew's eyes are closed and she sighs. "Argh… men are so stupid sometimes." She whispers to herself, out loud.

"What …did they…do this time?" Matthew whispers from his bed, his eyes flickering open, a smile playing on his lips.

"Oh, you're awake, you little sneak." Meredith smiled as she stepped away from the door and walked to Matthew.

"Yeah…" He smiles.

"Don't you worry about why I'm upset. You just worry about you." Meredith whispered, touching his cheek lightly.

"I don't… want…. to… worry anymore…" Matt said, his smile fading. "Meri, where… is Jacks?" He whispers, tears springing to his eyes. "I think… that… people are… keeping things from… me. Is… he hurt…?" Matt asked.

"Jacks? Why do you have to ask me the tough questions?" Meredith teased. Matthew smiled a little. "Well, I think you deserve the truth, don't you?" Matthew blinked back his tears as he listened to Meredith. "Jackson left the morning you both came in. He made sure that you got off the helicopter alright, and he and Derek got into a big argument."

"Crap." Matt mumbled.

"Yeah. It was a really bad one, and both of them said things that they shouldn't have. Jackson left that morning and we haven't been able to get a hold of him since." Meredith whispered. "I heard him on the phone this morning, someone answered his phone. A girl named 'Sam'. Did he have any friends by that name, that you know of?" Meredith asked.

"No. Only… talked… about… Char." Matt said with a wry smile.

"Hmm… it was really strange… well, I won't get into that. But we've been trying to get him on the phone, with no success." Meredith said sadly as she hovers over Matthew's bed for a few minutes, looking into his eyes.

"You miss… him…" Matthew stated.

"Yeah, I really miss him a lot." Meredith said softly.

"He's my snuggle pal. When he was a little boy and I would get sad, or come home from work tired, he'd crawl into my lap, and set his little head on my shoulder. He was always as quiet as a little mouse. He'd hum a little song and say… "Mama…" really softly. And I'd say "What is it, snuggle bug?" And he'd giggle and say. "Just making sure you're still awake." Meredith said, as tears began to slide down her cheeks.

"I miss him." Meredith said.

Matt could see the sheer sadness in her eyes and smiled just slightly. "He'll come home, Meri. He just needs to find that out for himself." Matt says softly.

"Thanks buddy. You've always been the smartest of the bunch." Meredith smiled. "What do you say, I go get Katie, and let you two have some alone time, together?" Meredith asked with a sigh as she wiped her tears on her sleeve.

"Sounds like a plan to me!" Matt exclaimed, sending Meredith a reassuring smile.

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Meredith smiled down at Matthew and put her hand on his cheek for a moment before turning around and walking out of his room. She turned and closed the door lightly and as she turned around, she almost ran into Derek, who was looking at a chart as he walked towards the room.

"Oh! Sorry!" He says with a smile as he purposefully brushes her arm with his.

Meredith turns to face him and gives him a playful glare. "I thought I told you to stay." Says as she tries not to grin.

"I stayed." He smiles as he leans against the wall, a small smile on his lips.

"How long?" She asks, still trying to remain serious.

"Until you turned the corner with Mark." He replies. "Meredith?" He says softly.

"What?" She asks, her eyes softening.

"I'm sorry." He says softly, reaching out to touch her face. "You've been crying." He says, looking at her swollen eyes.

She lets him touch her face and she leans her face against his hand. "Bring back my snuggle bug." She says, tears threatening to fall, her bottom lip trembling as she steps forward into his embrace as he hugs her close, letting her cry into his shoulder as he gently runs his fingers through her hair.

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2pm- North Dakota-

"I still can't believe you did that to my mother!" Jacks laughs, breaking the friendly silence.

"I can!" Sam laughs. "Wow, she sounded upset. Doesn't she know where you are?" Sam asked, looking at Jackson.

"No." Jack said sternly. The smile that was on his face, disappeared.

"Fine. I won't ask again." She says seriously. "Sorry."

"It's fine." Jack replies.

"I won't ask again… if…."

"If what? Sorry, I'm not in the business of brokering deals, especially from people that bum rides off unsuspecting travelers. For all I know, you have a sawed off shotgun in that backpack of yours!" Jack says with a small nervous laugh.

"It's a machete." Sam says seriously.

"What?"

"In my bag, why would I carry around a shotgun in my backpack? I would have to carry around ammo. You see, a machete is much easier to carry around." Sam says, glancing out the window.

"WHAT?" Jack says, looking over at her serious face.

Suddenly, she bursts out into a gale of laughter. "I can't believe you believed me! HAHAHA!!!" She laughs loudly.

Jack laughs nervously, eyes her bag and laughs a full, real laugh. They laugh for several minutes and then settle into a comfortable silence.

After a few minutes, Sam looks at Jack. "Seriously though, wanna rob a bank?"

Jack looks at her quickly with a surprised look, to which they both immediately began to laugh.

"Almost had you!" She laughs loudly as she reaches her arm up and begins to rub the back of his neck as he drives.

"You so did not!" Jack laughs back as he leans into her hand and continues to laugh.

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5pm- SGH-

"And Charlotte went to the house to pick up a couple of things for me. You're going to be really surprised when you see what I told her to bring." Katie giggles as she holds Matt's hand.

He smiles over at her and his eyes light up when he sees the door opening. "We…have… guests." He whispers in his raspy voice as he smiles when he sees Meredith walking into the room, followed by Derek.

"Hey." Katie says as she turns her head and smiles at her parents.

"Hey guys. We have some news about your options for surgery, and we want you to think about them very carefully, ok?" Meredith started. Katie nodded and held out her hand for her mother's.

"There is the first surgery that I told you about. We would try to stop the swelling and fluid build up around your spinal cord, by placing a metal rod in your back, we would be able to stabilize your spine and allow for what can heal, to heal. The problem with this surgery, as you know, is that… well, you're going to have a rod in your back. Not so fun." Derek says. Meredith gives him a playful glare. "Ok, ok." He says when Katie and Matt laugh a little. "There's another surgery. It is far more tricky than the first and it has only been successful in three particular incidences. In cases that it has not been successful, the patient has either been left off worse than they had started, or die." Derek said solemnly. Katie's face drops and she suddenly looks very sad.

"But… luckily for you, we found someone that will do it. I've spoken to Dr. Lockhart, and…"

"Dr. …Aurora… Lockhart?" Matthew asks quickly.

"Aunt Rory?" Katie says excitedly. "Wait, how do you know her?" She asks Matthew.

"I … have… seen her … lecture in… Paris." Matthew finishes. "She's… brilliant." Matthew says.

"Well, I spoke to her and sent her your charts and test results, and she thinks that you would be a perfect candidate for the surgery, right Derek?" Meredith says, looking over at Derek, who appears to be daydreaming.

"Huh? Oh yeah, she says you'd be a perfect candidate for the surgery. She will be here in a couple of days to do a thorough exam and then schedule the surgery accordingly." Derek says quickly.

"What were you thinking of? You were really gone there for a minute." Meredith says as she pats him on the back.

"I was just thinking about the first time I met Aurora. Wow, that was a long time ago." Derek whispers.

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The scotch was probably the reason Derek Shepherd made his way there, after a long, hard day. After shaking many executive hands, he was ready to pass out in his hotel room, but it was just one of those nights when he needed a drink, and needed it badly.

From outside, the pub looked friendly enough and stepping in, the laughter, old-fashioned smell of smoke and the alcohol had quickly charmed him. Much to Derek's relief, the barman spoke English, and after receiving a glass of his finest single malt, he sat down on a barstool further down the row. He put his glass against his temple, in a vain attempt to cure his throbbing headache. He hadn't operated, or even done anything strenuous, yet he felt wiped out. Exhausted.

Travelling had occupied his time, and many days he slept soundly in whatever hotel he was staying at. But he could hardly remember a day when his thoughts hadn't been occupied by Meredith Grey. Some days, she shimmered faintly at the corner of his mind, and others she was so clear he could almost see her in front of him. Sighing heavily, he drank some of his scotch.

To find himself, he had given up on a great many things, his job, his friends...Meredith...Not to mention lavender. He didn't regret his decision to go away, but just smelling that scent was pure agony. He must have looked so miserable, he caught the barman's attention.

"What causes the sorrow in your heart monsieur? Is it your work, or perhaps une femme fatal?" he asked him, smiling.

Derek was about to mutter a reply, but someone beat him to it.

"Successful-looking business men always have the weight of the world on their shoulders, didn't you know that Luc? I find it hard to believe that a woman would tip the scales." a voice said behind him.

The voice was musical, and laced with irony. Even though he wasn't in a talkative mood, Derek's curiosity made him turn around. A young woman sat down on the second stool away from him. The barman, Luc, abandoned drying his glasses and turned towards her with a wide smile.

"You are too young to be here! Come back when your hair is grey!"

The woman laughed and settled more comfortably in the chair. Derek noticed that she was very attractive, with dark-gold hair that framed her face. She was much younger that he had first thought, but nothing in her manner gave it away. Radiating confidence, not arrogance, but confidence she gave Derek a nod, and then looked around the bar. Her emerald eyes were full of satirical laughter, but also intelligence. Even though she was petite, Derek felt no wish to cross her. That surprised him a great deal. But she obviously demanded respect, and probably received it.

"The usual Aurora?" the barman asked, already reaching for a bottle.

She nodded, and even though Luc didn't see it, he fetched a glass and set it down in front of her.

"How many? Or how bad a day?"

The woman sighed theatrically.

"Do you realize how many times I had to explain my article to Duval? The senile old bat couldn't tell a great idea from his mother's knitting! So trois, s'il vous plaît."

As Luc poured, Derek noticed what she was drinking. Damn, he thought and finished his scotch. Tequila. The woman downed two straight after each other, without so much as a wince. He gave her a smile as his mind drifted away to the past, and a very different bar...

The woman eyed him curiously for a long while without blinking. She definitely wasn't hitting on him, just looking. Her gaze was so direct that Derek felt even more awkward. It was almost like she knew what he was thinking.

"Luc," she said, moving her head, but not her eyes, "perhaps the American gentleman would like another drink? You look like you need it!"

Derek laughed and rubbed his face with the pal of his hand and gratefully accepted the scotch that was passed to him. The woman raised her own glass.

"Skål!" she said and downed the third. Derek was quite impressed.

"I know a woman who drinks tequila just like you, like there's no tomorrow." he said thoughtfully and put his glass to his lips.

She smiled appreciatively.

"Is there any other way?"

But as she said that, she grew more serious, and absent-mindedly played with her serviette.

As he knew he would, Derek remembered all the times he'd seen Meredith with her trusty tequila at hand. When he met her for the first time, at her party, when-

"I know someone like that too."

The woman's voice interrupted his thoughts. She leaned back a bit, and Derek became more interested. He could smell his way to a good story, and this woman, like himself, seemed to have a great deal of them.

"She's the one who introduced tequila to me. You should see her, she's even worse that I am! You'd think she was drinking water..."

Derek nodded, and sipped his scotch again, more greedily, and out his hand in his inner pocket, feeling the edges of something square. He frowned and pulled it out. It was a brightly coloured postcard of the Eiffel tower, and his face lit up.

"What's that?" the young woman inquired and Derek hastily put it aside.

"Um..nothing. Please tell me about your friend, she sounds interesting." he replied quickly, having no desire to explain about his complicated love-life.

She raised her eyebrow, but said nothing about it.

"Well...what's there to say? She's a strong woman, hardworking and loyal, but sometimes I wonder if life hasn't been a little too cruel to her..."

She ran her hands through her hair and sighed.

"One thing's for sure, she won't be drinking tequila like she used to!"

"Why?" Derek had to admit he was becoming interested.

The woman's face darkened and her eyes blazed.

"She fell in love. With a married man! And that bastard got her pregnant..." she muttered.

"Seriously?"

"Mhm...and he left. He left her alone to raise her child. Bastard." she said again, and signalled for another tequila.

Derek looked up.

"He left her alone to raise their kid? That sounds like quite a jackass."

She snorted, but gave Luc the thumbs up as he presented her with a glass.

"You have no idea. I'm not sure if he knew about the baby...but it doesn't matter. That filthy piece of worthless vermin left her to go on some god damn soul-searching tour! That's the worst part. She really did love him, and he left. He had a wife that he didn't even tell her about! Then he sleeps with her, makes love to her, and the next day-" she snapped her fingers, "-gone. Vanished. She manages, she has friends, but the child is without a father, and she is without the love of her life. Bastard!"

She downed her fourth shot. Derek did the same and scratched his beard thoughtfully.

"Sounds complicated. But I feel sorry for your friend though...how do you know her?"

The woman put her elbows on the bar, and leaned against them, a furtive look in her eyes.

"At college...I only spent a term and a half there, but we found each other the first week and have known each other ever since. She is the sort of friend that even though you've been apart, when you meet, it's like nothing has changed...and we talk to each other, she sends me pictures of the baby..."

Her face lit up, and was such a pure happiness that Derek found himself smiling too.

"She has the most beautiful little girl...blue eyes and brown curls...adorable. And even though the pregnancy was hard...somehow, I don't think she would have managed without her little girl. They support each other, you know?"

The young woman shook herself and sat up straight again. She turned to Derek and gave him a sly smile.

"What is wrong with me? I'm getting sentimental with a complete stranger, American no less!" she laughed, and gave him an intent look, "So it is only fair that you return the gesture. You could start by telling me what's so special about that postcard you're failing so miserably to hide."

Derek laughed nervously, caught off guard. She had now turned completely towards him, and gave him a challenging look. Finally he shrugged and decided to, for once, ignore his impulses and throw caution to the wind. He pulled out the postcard with far more affection than one would usually show for an ordinary postcard. The woman's, Aurora's, interest was certainly piqued, and it was as if he was showing her his most prized possession.

Derek slid it across the bar, but the woman gave him a questioning look. Only when he had nodded did she pick it up. Her eye-movement across the postcard was curious, she completely ignored some bits, and stared at others. Derek felt a little uncomfortable at the sigh of the many emotions that flew across her face, too many to count, too fleeting to recognize. Had he really done the right thing in showing it to her?

"Do you love her?"

"What?"

She gave him a surprisingly cold glare.

"I said, do you love her?"

Derek frowned, he was extremely confused, by the question and the sudden change of atmosphere.

"You mean the woman I'm writing to? Meredith?"

She turned her head to look at the cheerful postcard, that seemed so out of place. Derek was getting a headache.

"No, I meant Luc, you looked like you were flirting-of course the woman you're writing to!" she snapped and gave him a filthy look.

Derek was offended, and quite angry. A second ago they were joking and now she was furious with him! He'd heard people in France were temperamental, but this was something else.

"Look, I don't know how-"

"Yes, or no?"

Crumbling before her piercing glare, his shoulders relaxed and Derek sighed heavily, casting a longing look at his empty glass.

"Yes."

The woman nodded once, and turned her head away from him. When she spoke, her voice was muffled.

"And this Meredith, does she love you?"

Derek covered his face with his hand. That was the very question he had been asking himself for months. Did Meredith love him? Should she love him? Could she love him? And would she ever want to see him again?

"I hope so." he said quietly.

When she turned back towards him, he was surprised to see the sadness in her eyes, the pain. Slowly, she slide the postcard back to him.

"Then how come six sentences, once a month is all she gets?"

Derek felt like someone had hit him with a sledgehammer. Those few words were enough to make him dizzy and his hand gripped the edge of the bar, steadying him. For months he had contemplated going back, but it had stayed a thought, a dream, a wish. Never before had the ache been so powerful.

"I...I don't know..." he said hoarsely.

"You're a coward." she said with such loathing he didn't know how to respond.

He bit his lip forcefully and clenched his fists in frustration.

"Look! You don't know-"

"I know enough! Are you afraid she won't take you back?"

Again, the breath was knocked out of him. But only because he knew the answer, he knew it all too well.

"Yes. Terrified." he replied truthfully, not sure why he was telling a stranger this.

She slid off the stool, and stood before him, quivering with pent up anger. Derek didn't move. It was probably safest that way. The young woman leaned towards him.

"Then you should get your pathetic behind on a plane and find out."

With that she turned and started walking away.

Derek felt numb, but somehow throbbing as well. Had he really just set foot in here twenty minutes ago? And should he take her advice?

As the woman started to make her way through the crowd, she suddenly stopped. Turning around, she looked at him from across the smoky bar, a small smile playing on her lips.

"But if you really want to win her back Dr Shepherd...lose the beard!" she said, laughing.

--------------------

"So you met her in Paris and didn't know who she was?" Katie asks. "I don't think you've ever told me that story before." Katie smiles.

"Yep. And she kicked my butt all the way back home, where I had a family waiting for me, and I didn't even know it." Derek says softly as he pulls Meredith into his lap.

"So she's thinks she can do the surgery successfully?" Katie asked, getting her hopes up.

"She 'knows' that she can do the surgery successfully. She's the only neurosurgeon that has done it successfully. She's agreed to do it, but your mom and I have to hold our end of the bargain." Derek said with a sly grin.

"And what is that?" Meredith laughed, turning her head to look at him.

He lightly pushes her off his lap, she stands up and he starts for the door. "She said that you would know what she means." Derek laughs as she laughs, turns around and walks out the door.

--------------------

May 11, 2032- 9:00pm- Minnesota-

"I can't believe this place has only one room left!" Jack says angrily as he drags his suitcase up the stairs to the room that the hotel staff person had directed him too.

"Relax, geez, it's the only place around, what did you want to do, keep driving? You won't let me drive your car, and you look like you're going to fall asleep, and we both know how well that turned out last night, don't we?" Sam said, frustrated with Jack's sudden attitude change.

"Shut up." Jack said angrily as he swung the door open to the room. He takes a step into the room and switches on the light. "CRAP!" He yells out as he looks into the room, where all he sees is one queen size bed, a small desk and a table with a television on it. He walks over to the bed and picks up a pillow, Sam is right behind him. He tosses the pillow on the ground, drops his suitcase and lays down on the bed. Motioning to the ground, he looks up at her and grins. "Make yourself comfortable, roomie."

Sam looks at him, looks at the ground and back up at him again. "I am absolutely NOT sleeping on the floor in this disgusting hotel" Sam says with a scowl.

"Listen, freeloader. I pay for the gas, I pay for the room, and…"

"I pay for the chiropractor? Give me a break. There's enough room on that bed for two people, move over!" She says angrily as she pushes on him.

"Cut it out, you sleep on the floor." Jack says as he pushes her hands off of him.

"Well I'm not going to sleep yet, so I'm just going to lay on the bed for now, ok?" Sam asks, with a sly grin.

"Go sit on the chair, hobo girl. Its my bed!" Jack argues.

"Not very gentlemanly JACKSON! NO wonder you don't have a GIRLFRIEND!" she spits out angrily. Suddenly his face falls at her comment and all fight that was in him is visibly drained from his body. He rolls over in the bed and faces the wall, refusing to look at her. She immediately notices his change in attitude once again. "Hey…" She says softly, trying to get his attention. She kneels lightly on the bed and moves over to him slowly. "Hey…I'm sorry… I don't have any right to say anything like that to you, I don't even know you. I'm sorry." Sam say softly, putting her hands on his arm.

Suddenly, Jackson brushes her hands off of him and stands up. He walks over to his suitcase and unzips it. He pulls out two bottles of tequila and walks back to the other side of the bed. He sets one of the bottles on the bed, opens the other and takes a long drink from it. He picks up the other bottle and tosses it to Sam, who catches it, her eyes wide with curiosity. "Here, drink up. It'll help you sleep." He says as he takes another swig straight from the bottle, and sits down on the bed, leaning his back against the headboard, staring straight ahead.

Sam sits next to him with her back on the headboard, the bottle of tequila in her hand as she stares straight ahead also.
"Aren't you going to drink it? It makes all of the pain go away." Jack says softly. "It's magic"

"I don't have any pain." Sam says, confused. She looks over at Jack and he's staring at her. His blue eyes are so full of pain, it breaks her heart. "You do." She said as she put the bottle down on the bedside table. She moved closer to him and put her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her shoulder as if by reflex as she leaned her head on his chest. He took a swig of the drink and swallowed it down easily, as he continued to stare at the wall.

Sam reached up and grabbed the bottle from his hand and took a long fast drink from the bottle. She handed the bottle back to him and glanced up at him with a smile. "Hey, you're a professional." He says as he looks down at her face.

"My mom was an alcoholic." Sam says sadly.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"I'm kidding." She says seriously.

"No kidding?" Jack says with a little laugh as he takes another drink from the bottle. Sam giggles and takes the bottle from his hand again, taking another long drink from it.

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About an hour later, the two bottles of tequila sit, empty on the bedside table. Jackson lay sprawled out on the bed, with Sam nestled comfortably against his chest as they watch the television.

"Sammy, you're a good friend. I don't know you, but you're great." Jack says out of no where.

"Thanks, Jackson…" She giggles for a second as she rolls away from him and lays next to him. "You're fun too. You know what?"

"Hmm…"

"I was thinking… where'd your parents come up with that name from? Huh? Jackson. Sounds so… weird." Sam stumbles as she speaks, giggling at his name.

"Shh…." He says, swatting at her with a scowl on his face.

"No, really… Were your parents like… fans of the king of pop or something?" She giggles for a few seconds until she realizes that Jackson isn't laughing. He is laying with his arms crossed with a scowl on his face. "What'd I say wrong now?" She asks as she rolls to her side, trying to get him to look at her.

"Jackson is my father's dead brother." Jack says, kind of angrily. The two of them became very silent.

"Dead brother? That's weird. I'm sorry…" Sam slurred.

"No… its fine. My dad was a twin… his brother was underweight … he only lived long enough to be given a name, only one or two days." Jack explained.

"That's awful! I can't imagine losing a baby!" Sam slurred as she rolled over and gave Jack a hug. Jack hugged her back and they lay for a while in silence.

"My sister's having babies." Jack blurted out.

"Yeah? More than one?"

"Yep. She's having twins. Probably born by now." Jack said sadly.

"You seem awfully sad for being a new uncle. Why aren't you there celebrating? Holding the babies, pinching their little cheeks, counting their little toes?" Sam asked.

"Shhhh…. " He says softly.

"I get it… you say 'shh…' when you want me to shut up!" She says with a giggle.

"That's what it means, generally." Jackson says as he shifts a little.

Sam lays on her back and starts to roll towards the edge. She lays on her side facing the bedside table and picks up a penny off the bedside table and starts to play with it. She fiddles with it for a little while as she lets Jack sulk. "Hey, you never told me why you ran away from home." She says as she clumsily tries to spin the penny on the table.

Jackson was silent for a few seconds as he contemplated her question. "I killed my sister's fiancé."

thud

"Hey, where'd you go?"

Sam was silent on the floor next to the bed.

"Sammy?" Jack whispered as he shifted on the bed. He moved onto his tummy and peeked over the side of the bed. "Samma llama ding dong?" He says as he looks over the side of the bed. Sam is lying on her back, with her hands covering her face. Jack can see her peeking out between her fingers. "Did I say something wrong?" Jack asks as he looks down at her. "Are you ok?"

Sam nods her head. "What did you just say before… did you say you killed someone?" She asks, her voiced muffled by her hands.

Jack rolls back on the bed and puts his head on his pillow. He closes his eyes "Yeah, I killed my soon to be brother in law." He mumbles to himself. "The father of my sister's children." He says sadly.

Sam peeks over the edge of the bed. "How'd you do it?" She says creepily.

Jack looks over at her and sees her head sticking up from the side of the bed, just enough so that he can see the top of her head and her eyes. He starts to laugh at the way she asked her question, which only succeeds in making her feel more uneasy. "Stop laughing! It was a reasonable question. How'd you off him?" Sam asks in an eerie voice.

Still laughing, Jack reaches his hand out to her. "Come back up here. I didn't do it on purpose. We were mountain climbing." He says softly as she takes his hand and he pulls her up onto the bed so that she has her head on his chest. "My sister and my girlfriend told me not to take him, because he was inexperienced. We didn't listen and we went. He fell, and I got the crap kicked out of me by my father and my girlfriend dumped me."

"All in the same day?"

"Yep."

"Wow…"

"Yep." Jack responded.

"Hey."

"What?"

"Did you kill your father too?" Sam asked, looking up at him.

He lifted his head up off the pillow and looked down at her with a puzzled expression. "What?"

"Your father, did you kill him too? You said when we first met that he was dead." Sam says quietly.

"No. I didn't kill my father." Jack said softly. "He did that all by himself." He whispered.

"Hey… I gotta do something." Jack said suddenly as he rolled away from Sam and stumbled to his feet.

"What? Where are you goin?" Sam asked as she pulls the blanket up on herself and snuggles into the pillow.

"I have to call Charlotte. I have to." He says softly as he stumbles out to the car to get his phone. He climbs into the back seat and grabs the phone and drunkenly makes his way back up the stairs to the room. He stumbles into the room loudly and Sam is curled up in the blankets like a little kitten, her eyes half closed as she watches the television.

Jack stands there for a minute as he looks down at her and smiles slightly as he takes his phone into the bathroom with him. He sits down in the bathtub and he clumsily finds Charlotte's number in the directory.

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