"All I wanted was a normal life...and that's exactly what I got." - Anonymous


I knew something was wrong the moment I rolled out of bed. Because I didn't roll out of bed. I rolled into a wall. If my memory was anything to go by, there had never been a bloody wall next to my bed. The next thing I noticed, when I rolled the other way, was that I almost fell out of bed. Now, I hate to brag, but my bed is massive. This was not a massive bed. This was a queen at the very most. Had I fallen asleep in Connor's room again? No. The room didn't smell like Connor. The room smelt like a normal, average human's room. Where was I?

I didn't want to chance opening my eyes. I was warm, I was comfortable, I was most certainly ready to fall asleep again so that I could wake up for real this time, and I didn't want to see the disaster just waiting to happen. But apparently, I didn't have a choice. Someone was banging on my door. No, that wasn't right. Someone was banging on the door. It certainly wasn't my door. If someone banged on my door, it would sound like a normal knock from the other side. Not this door. This door shook with every hit.

"Mirany! You're going to be late for work!"

Work? I worked? No I didn't. However, there was one thing I recognized. The sound of Connor's voice. Thank God. At least one thing in this dreamland related back to my normal life. I heard the door open.

"Mirany?"

Now, usually when somebody enters a room, their scent fills the entire room, at least, it does for me. I couldn't smell Connor at all. I sat bolt upright and sniffed at my hand. There was no smell. It was just a hand, and now that I was paying attention, it was a hand without a Warrior's mark on it. Something truly was wrong. Connor looked shocked.

"Wow. Okay. Never seen you so awake right after waking up before," he said. "Is there something wrong?"

I clambered off the far-too-small bed and sniffed at him. I could smell his deodorant, but I couldn't smell his scent. What the hell was going on?

"Um...Mirany, hon, why are you sniffing me?" asked Connor.

He was wearing a shirt. A proper shirt, with buttons and a starched collar and everything. And a tie. Connor was wearing a tie. That settled it. If it hadn't been a dream before, it was definitely one now. His voice sounded different. I couldn't hear all the little quivers in the pitch that I used to. It was almost as if I was...oh boy.

"I'm human," I muttered.

"Well, I'd certainly hope so," said Connor, looking seriously confused. "What happened? Did you have a bad dream or something?"

"No, but I'm having one now," I said.

Connor brushed my fringe out of my eyes and wrapped his arms around my waist.

Wait. Is he really about to-

Connor cut off my thoughts with a kiss.

Jesus Christ, I've missed that. Wait! No! Bad! What the hell is going on?

"I made you breakfast," he said when we broke apart. "Maybe you just need to get a bit of food in you."

"Yeah," I breathed. "Maybe."

I will be extremely surprised if food solves this problem.

I followed him through a house that I had never seen before, and immediately didn't like. It was too small and cluttered. There was stuff on every surface and there couldn't have been more than three rooms here. Connor was talking but I didn't register a single word he was saying until I heard, "...because you are pregnant."

I froze.

"What?" I asked dumbly.

Connor stopped and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you feeling alright?" he asked, placing a hand on my forehead.

"No," I said fervently. "What were you saying about pregnant?"

"You. Are pregnant," said Connor. "Mirany, I think I should take you to a doctor."

I looked down at my stomach and blanched. That was why I was feeling especially weird. Aside from having none of my powers or senses, I was huge! I had to be at least eight months into pregnancy.

"Jesus Christ I'm a whale!" I exclaimed.

Connor smiled slightly.

"Mirany, you're beautiful," he said, rubbing a hand across the bulge where nicely toned abs had once lived.

"How did we meet?" I asked.

Connor blinked.

"What?"

"What about your parents? Where are they? What are their names? Where are my parents?" I asked.

"I'm taking you to a doctor," said Connor decidedly. "Work can wait."

"I don't need to go to a doctor, I need you to answer my questions!" I insisted.

Connor wasn't listening.

"Connor!"

He stopped searching for his keys under the mess on top of one of the little tables in the hallway and looked at me. I gave him my best pleading look.

"Please? Humor me."

Connor sighed.

"My parents names are Darlene and Liam," he said. "They moved back to Ireland a year ago after living here to raise me. Your parents live about half an hour out of LA. We met in high school."

"I went to high school?" I asked. "What about the rest of my family?"

"Your brother's a mechanic over in Washington and Lilah's a lawyer at some firm called Wolfram and Hart in the middle of LA. You talk to them both at least once a week."

"They're all alive," I muttered, turning away from him.

"Mirany, come on. You're really getting me worried. You need a doctor."

"Which means," I continued, completely ignoring him, "that none of it ever happened. I'm human. I'm not the Slayer. Angel's not a vampire..."

I turned back to Connor.

"I'm normal," I finished.

"Yeah, that's debatable," said Connor, taking me around the waist and steering me into the kitchen. "Look, have some breakfast. If you're still acting strange I will carry you to a doctor."

"You'd have to have super powers to carry this load," I muttered, scowling at my stomach.

"Yeah well, you're carrying another two, you're gonna be big," said Connor. "But you're still beautiful."

"Twins? Dear God no."

Okay, then. In that case, I probably wasn't eight months in. Maybe more like five or six. Twins. I really, really needed to wake up now. Connor, God bless him, placed a huge plate of bacon and eggs and toast in front of me.

"You are a saint," I told him.

"You already knew that," said Connor, smirking and handing me a fork.

I grabbed his hand and turned it until I could clearly see the ring on his finger.

"Yes Mirany, we're married," said Connor before I could ask. "I don't know why you need to ask, but we are. We've been married for two years now."

I let go of him and slumped back into my chair.

"This is really happening, isn't it?" I asked. "I'm not dreaming."

"Should you be?" asked Connor.

"Oh God, how did I get here?" I asked the room at large. "And how the hell do I leave?"

"Mirany, what are you talking about?" asked Connor.

"This isn't my life," I hissed at him. "In my life, I'm on top of the world! My bedroom is the same size as this entire house! I'm the Slayer! I'm a wolf! My entire family's dead! You're dad's a bloody vampire! I save the world!"

"Okay, you know what? Screw the doctor, I'm taking you to a psychiatrist," said Connor.

"What do my parents do for a living?" I asked.

"Uh...your dad's a personal trainer, your mum's a historian. Specializes in medieval history," said Connor.

"Wrong. They're Watchers. They train Slayers and Warriors," I said firmly.

Connor stared at me.

"Mirany, there's something wrong with you. You need to see someone," he said firmly.

"Yeah, there is something wrong with me! I'm bloody well human!" I yelled at him. "I'm pregnant! We're married! This world is wrong!"

"Okay, I'm calling you mother," said Connor.

"You are not!" I told him firmly.

"Try and stop me," Connor challenged, grabbing the phone and bolting from the room.

I scowled. I was surprised I could even walk like this. Running was not going to be my strong suit.

"I hate you," I muttered, turning back to my bacon. "Well, the rest of the world may be wrong, but there is nothing wrong with bacon."

...

"Mum. Lilah."

I stared at them as they walked in. Connor had all but placed me on the couch and banned me from moving until they got here, but now that they were here, I got ot my feet.

"Mirany, honey, sit down. Lilah and I are here to talk-"

I cut her off as I hugged her tightly. I didn't care how wrong this world was. My mother was alive, and not a shape-shifter. When I let go of her, I moved to Lilah, hugging her so tightly that if I had been the Slayer, I would have crushed her.

"Oh my God, I've missed you," I told them.

"What are you talking about Mirany? We saw you two days ago," said mum.

"No," I said, letting go of Lilah. "No, you're dead. I haven't seen you in so long."

"She keeps going on about this 'other world'," said Connor. "I wanted to take her to someone but she just won't go. She's not making any sense."

Lilah pulled me back over to the couch and sat down beside me.

"I knew you were loopy but I didn't think you were this bad," she said. "Listen, whatever's going on in that freaky head of yours, it's just going on in your head. You've probably had some sort of strange dream and you've fixated. Mirany, this is your life. Right here. With Connor and us. All alive. All happy."

"You work at Wolfram and Hart right?" I asked her.

"Yes," said Lilah slowly.

"Then you know exactly what I'm talking about! You know what a Slayer is! You know that vampires exist! Don't try to deny it!" I told her.

Lilah looked up at mum.

"She's truly gone insane now," she said fervently.

Mum crouched in front of me.

"Listen to me Mirany. Whatever you believe should be happening, isn't. Whatever you believe exists, doesn't. Do you understand me?"

"But-"

"Mirany, Lilah's right. This is your life, and whatever you're talking about is just in your mind," she said firmly. "Am I clear?"

I stared at her. How could I have been so stupid? Ranting about a different world with vampires and Slayers, where most of the people in my here were dead. Of course they were treating me like I was insane. I couldn't go around saying these things. I had to play by the rules. Until I figured out what was going on, I had to be normal. The only problem was that I had no idea how to be normal.

"Yes," I said eventually. "I'm sorry, I...I don't know what came over me."

Connor sighed with relief and Lilah smirked, as though she knew perfectly well that I was just saying this to keep myself out of an asylum.

"Good girl," said mum, straightening up.

"And Lilah?"

Lilah raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not loopy," I told her.

"Yeah, you're completely sane," said Lilah sarcastically.

I glared at her as she got to her feet.

"I have to get back to work," she said. "Mirany, try not to go too insane. I'll see you later. Mother, am I driving you?"

Mum looked at me. I didn't want her to go. I hadn't truly seen her in years, but apparently, in this life, I saw her a lot.

"I'm fine," I said. "Go."

She kissed my head and left with Lilah. I stared after her. My mum and dad were alive. My siblings were alive. Everyone on the damn planet was alive. What sort of magic was this? Was it even magic, or was this truly a dream? No. I'd have woken up by now, surely. This was some sort of different...dimension. How the hell had I managed to jump dimensions in my sleep!

Connor sat down beside me, brushing my hair aside.

"Do you have an explanation of any sort?" he asked.

"Um...pregnancy delusions?" I tried.

Connor chuckled.

"I called your work, they said they could get you covered for today," he said. "So will you please, just this once, spend the rest of the day relaxing?"

"Well I can't exactly go to the gym," I said pointedly.

Connor smiled.

"Do you want me to stay?" he asked.

"No," I sighed. "Go to work. Earn me some money."

"Alright," he said. "I love you."

"I love you too."

The words sounded strange coming from my mouth. Had I ever actually said 'I love you too' to anyone besides my parents before? I couldn't remember doing so. Connor got up to leave.

"Connor?" I asked.

He turned at once.

"Do we have more bacon?"

...

A phone that didn't connect to my computer. This was new to me. I didn't like the idea that if I wanted to see someone's face when I talked to them, I'd have to actually go and find them and talk to them in person. Oh why couldn't I be rich if I had a normal life? As I waited for my bacon to cook, I scrolled through the contacts on my mobile. At least, I hoped it was my mobile. I'd found it lying around, and considering that Connor had gone to work and had probably taken his phone, I was probably right in thinking that this had to be mine.

The number I was looking for was my work. I couldn't very well pretend that the 'episode' I had just had was finished if I didn't know what I did at work. But I didn't even get close when I found 'Daddy'. I'd seen mum. I'd heard her voice. And she was clearly not a shape-shifter like the last time. I just needed to hear his voice, no matter how weird that was going to sound to him. I shouldn't though. It probably wasn't normal for me to just randomly call my father without a good reason. But despite my better judgement, I called him anyway.

"Mark Hunter."

"Daddy?"

"Mirany! What's up kiddo?"

I'd forgotten he used to call me that.

"Not much," I said.

"What do you need sweetheart? If you're at home, I'm about ten minutes away. If you're craving something I can bring it for you."

I bit my lip. This had been a really bad idea. I could feel the tears welling up. I had always been so much closer to dad than mum. I had to see him. I should tell him that I didn't need anything. That I was just calling to check in. But no. I had to see him, just for a little while.

"Are you busy? Can you stay for a coffee?"

"Sure thing kiddo. I'll be right over."

He hung up and I just listened to the dial tone for a good minute. I was really, really stupid. Finally, I hung up as well, and continued on my hunt for a 'Work' contact. I found it, right near the bottom and called.

"LA's Hottest Hits Radio. Josh speaking."

"Josh? It's Mirany."

"Mirany! Hey, how are you? Connor called, said you weren't feeling great."

"Oh I...hit my head," I lied. "Actually, I had a bit of amnesia I think. I can't remember what time I usually come in..."

"Dude, you ought to get that bump looked at if you can't remember that. You've been coming in since you were sixteen, though, to be fair, you were coming in the afternoons then..."

"Josh."

"Sorry. Uh, our session's eight to eleven each morning.

"Thank you. Sorry I can't make it today. I just don't feel well enough. I'll be in tomorrow."

"Don't sweat it Mirany. We both know I have enough talk in me to last a week at the least."

"Ha. Yeah...well, bye."

I hung up. I worked at a radio station? Okay, that was pretty cool, but still...a radio station? This world just kept getting weirder. My bacon was ready now, and, as I took the fry pan off the stove, I felt a kick from one of the twins.

...

Dad had always been awesome. That was just dad. He was funny and open-minded and fairly easy going. The fact that he was open-minded meant that when I told him about my 'episode', he was all for pretending that this really was a different world to the one I had been in, and we were still discussing ideas when Connor came back from work at four. Dad had gotten here at one. What we'd come up with ranged from a dream to my being a robot that had rebooted or something. But not only had we come up with ideas, we'd brain-stormed how I might test them. That was what I really needed. I didn't know if any of it would work, but at least I had some ideas as to how I might figure out what was going on. And if I knew what was going on, there was every chance that I'd be able to fix it.

Hanging with my dad had been...amazing. I'd almost forgotten what it had been like when I was younger, and know that I was older and understood the double entendres, it was even better. Dad was so easy to be around. I didn't have to care, about anything, when he was here, and I could say what I wanted. The pregnancy did have a good side though. When he'd noticed tears rolling down my face, I could blame it on hormones instead of saying 'I haven't talked to you like this for nearly eight years'. That was useful.

"Hey honey," I said as Connor entered. Again, it sounded strange coming from my mouth.

"Hi," said Connor, smiling at me. "I see you managed to relax...sort of. Hi Mark. So, are we out of bacon again?"

I bit my lip guiltily.

"It's really yummy," I said. "How was work?"

I still didn't know what he did.

"The bloody editor decided he'd take the day off without giving any notice, so I was given the job," said Connor, scowling. "Because, you know, giving 'the new kid' the job of editor for the day is always a great idea."

Mark smirked.

"So...don't read the newspaper tomorrow?" he asked.

"Oh, you won't have to worry about that. I'll be burning down the printing press tonight," said Connor fervently.

Connor wrote for a newspaper...that was different.

"Oh Connor?"

"Mmm?"

"I couldn't reach the chocolate," I said. "It's on the top shelf."

"There's a reason for that," said Connor pointedly.

Dad winced.

"Oh, you have so much to learn," he muttered. "You bring a whole new meaning to the phrase 'young and stupid'. You don't deny pregnant women anything Connor."

I crossed my arms and gave Connor a 'so there' sort of look. Connor sighed and reached up to the top of the cupboard.

"This stuff is not good for you," he told me, tossing it to me.

"Neither is bacon but I notice you haven't put that out of my reach," I pointed out.

"At least bacon has some semblance of protein and iron," Connor muttered.

"Well then, get more bacon," I said simply.

Connor rolled his eyes as he sat down.

"So what have you two been doing while I've been slaving away?" he asked.

I shook my head slightly at dad, who got the message at once.

"Oh, we just talked," he said casually.

"About what?" asked Connor.

"This and that."

"You know, the last time you two 'just talked about this and that', Mirany decided she wanted kids," said Connor pointedly. "Do I have to prepare myself for anything?"

What? No. I would never, ever decide to have kids. 'Other me' is really weird.

"No," I said defensively.

"Just making sure," said Connor.

"I should go," said dad, getting to his feet. "I'll see you later kiddo."

Resisting the urge to hug him and not let go for the next five years, I smiled and nodded.

"Bye daddy."

"See you around," said Connor, shaking his hand as Mark passed.

"You might wanna think about getting her a dog," said dad quietly.

Connor stared after him and then back at me.

"A dog?" he asked.

I shrugged.

"Siberian Huskies are really cute."

...

Connor actually had to help me lie down, I was so big. And to think that I volunteered for this. I wanted the things. Ugh, I'm never getting pregnant. Clearly, my family not being alive had changed the way I thought drastically. And the way that I lived. My parents weren't Watchers in this world. They weren't rich. I don't know how they came about all that money just by being Watchers. Wesley was a Watcher and he certainly wasn't rich. But it didn't matter. What mattered is that they weren't rich, which meant I really had lived a very normal life. I'd even gone to school. I had a job.

I would sleep tonight. There was no point in stressing out just yet. But tomorrow, tomorrow I would try every single way of getting out of here. I had to get back to my real life. I loved this life. My family was alive, I was married, I had a job. I was normal, and that was fantastic, but it was too different. This just wasn't my life. It wasn't what was meant to happen to me. I was missing Angel already, and I'd only been here one day. I couldn't help but wonder, if I was here, in 'normal Mirany's' life, then was 'normal Mirany' in mine? What a shock that would be, seeing how the Mirany of another dimension lived compared to her. She'll probably come back and want to hug everyone as well.

"Sure you're alright?" asked Connor.

"Yes," I sighed for the four-hundredth time. "I'm fine. Like I said, it was probably just some dream that I had that my mind decided to hold onto."

"Doesn't sound like the sort of dream you'd want to hang on to," said Connor. "I can't imagine what you'd do if your dad was dead."

Oh, probably kill someone.

"And you're absolutely sure you don't want to see someone? What could it hurt Mirany?"

"Connor, I'm fine," I said earnestly. "No doctors or psychiatrists necessary. I promise you I'm fine."

I kissed him softly. This was one thing in this world that felt right. Connor and I. Together. I think it was always going to feel right, even back in my world. Hanging with Connor was just...it just worked, like it did with my dad. But there was no point in me dwelling over something that could have happened. It had passed, we'd both moved on...sort of, and we were dealing...sort of. I knew it was going to come to a head between Connor and Angel eventually, and I knew that when it did, I was going to have to make the biggest decision of my life, but while it was alright, while we were just friends, it was good.

"Alright," said Connor. "Good night honey."

Honey. I don't think I ever called him honey. I don't think he ever called me honey.

...

I didn't have to open my eyes to know that I was back where I belonged. I could smell everything, I could hear everything, I didn't feel like I was carrying an extra hundred pounds, and my bed felt comfier.

"Happy now?" asked Angel's voice.

I opened my eyes and looked over at him. He was scowling at me.

"I had to spend the day explaining to you everything that you that you weren't pregnant, that your parents were dead and that it is alright to be kissed by me because Connor was not your husband," he said. "The next time you want to know what it would be like to have a normal life, just pretend. I'm not doing that spell again."

So it had been a spell. But why hadn't I remembered that I'd wanted to do it. I remembered now. I remembered fighting with Angel over it until he finally gave in. I remembered why. We'd just finished a case where someone had managed to cast a spell that sent them into another dimension. I'd wanted to try it, but with Wesley and Angel's help so that I wouldn't be permanently stuck there if I didn't like it. We'd settled for twenty-four hours. One day in the life of other me. I guess other me had come here.

"Um...sorry?" I tried.

Angel sighed. He certainly wasn't done, but I'd just woken up, and he knew he wasn't going to get far.

"So how was it? From what I heard, it sounded pretty good."

"It was...amazing, but it wasn't me," I said. "If I'd been stuck there forever, it certainly wouldn't have been a bad thing. But I wasn't rich over there, and I need money. Money is my friend. You know, you were alive."

"Yeah, in Ireland," said Angel. "Trust me, I know."

"I think you would have liked it," I said. "Sounded to me like you were pretty happy yourself."

Angel stared at me.

...

"So...?" asked Connor. "How was it?"

"Well, for one thing, my whole family was alive," I said, tapping my fingers impatiently as I waited for coffee. "Why are we out here?"

"Because I'm sick the hotel and your coffee is disgusting," said Connor simply. "The whole family huh? Were they how you remember them?"

"To the letter," I said.

"And clearly you weren't the Slayer," said Connor. "Or a wolf."

"Nope," I said. "Nothing strange about me. Except that I was pregnant. With twins."

"Pregnant?" Connor chuckled. "Who forced you into that?"

"Apparently I wanted them," I said.

"Wow," said Connor. "Very different you then. So, who was the lucky guy?"

I bit my lip.

"You were," I said eventually.

Connor stared at me in silence as the waitress finally brought over the coffee.

"I...I was?"

"We were married," I said quietly. "Met in high school."

Connor was still staring.

"We were married? Truly?"

"Yeah. You had a job at a newspaper and I was a radio host and we lived in some tiny little house together and we were expecting twins," I said.

"Well that's...unexpected," said Connor at last. "What about Angel?"

"Liam moved back to Ireland last year with his wife Darlene," I said. "Human."

"Were we-"

"Still basically us in every other aspect? Yes," I said.

"Mirany, don't you think this means something?" asked Connor. "If we're married in some other life, maybe we-"

"Aren't married in this life because everything in that life was completely different to this one!" I said pointedly. "Connor please, don't start this again."

Connor looked put out.

"What was it like?" he asked. "Were we...did we still...?"

I took his hand.

"It was...it felt right," I said carefully. "And yes. We were still in love with each other. But Connor, this life is too different to know whether it would have worked between us here."

"Yeah, yeah I guess so," muttered Connor.

...

Lilah,

I got a taste of something yesterday. A taste that I'll never get again. Wesley and Angel sent me to a different dimension. A dimension where I was normal. Over there, you were alive. So was mum and dad and Jase. I didn't get to see Jase, but I saw you and everyone else. I was pregnant over there. Pregnant with twins. Connor's twins. We were married. It was weird over there. I mean, I would happily have stayed there for the rest of my life, but still...nothing felt right. Well, almost nothing. My relationship with Connor felt right.

It's really starting to become prominent now, my feelings for Connor. I still have no idea what they are, but they're definitely there. I know I can't do anything about them. Not yet anyway. But eventually they're going to make me choose, aren't they? I don't know who I really love. I wish it was simple. I wish one of them would do something. Something that would just make it click, you know? Too bad I know what that something would be.

You'd know, wouldn't you? You always knew, didn't you? You knew everything. Why can't I know everything? Why is everything so complicated? And why don't I ever eat bacon any more? That stuff is good.

I guess I'll talk to you later,Mirany.