Hello Everyone

Well at least I hope that there are still some of you around reading this to say hello to lol.
Once again I profusely apologise for the time it has taken for me to get this written and posted, life has just been so hectic and I have not had the time to write but I promise that I have not forgotten this fic and I will finish it.

You have waited long enough so I won't ramble on, without further ado, here's the long awaited update, hope you enjoy...

Chapter 52 - Think about it

The last twenty four hours had been the most worrying time Derek could honestly say he had ever experienced in his entire life. Fortunately though the gods appeared to be on their sides and Meredith's ICP levels had significantly reduced without the need for medical intervention and her blood pressure had finally began to reduce as well. Derek let out a huge sigh as he bent forward and kissed the back of Meredith's fingers carefully avoiding her IV. If Meredith's condition continued to improve there were plans to try to bring her out of her medically induced coma the following morning. His free hand gently ran across the swell of her abdomen and he couldn't help the smile which graced his features as one of the twins soccer punched him.

"Hey there buddy, you take is easy on your mama for a while," he chuckled slightly as he bent forward and kissed her tummy. He was convinced that one if not both of the baby's was a boy given the force of the punches and kicks they could deliver. Meredith told him time and time again though that he couldn't base his opinions just on that as Lia had been one hell of a kicker; so much so that she was able to make an entire plate of food that was rested on Meredith's stomach fall off with a single kick. Derek smiled at that thought as he could well believe that. Lia was something else. He was kind of dreading her teenage years, she was a complete force of nature and she had him completely wrapped around her little finger. Thoughts of Lia made him smile because if it was not for her, he didn't think he would have gotten through the last 24 hours and remain sane. She had been a welcome distraction. The gentle knock which came from the door interrupted his thoughts and he sat up straight and turned around just as the door opened.

"Ma," Derek said in surprise; although deep down he was not really shocked by her appearance at the hospital. If anything he was surprised that she had stayed away so long.

"I am sorry son that I didn't get here sooner; Amy only let me know an hour ago. You should have called me."

"I am sorry, it's just I didn't want to believe how serious it was. I just kept thinking that Meredith was going to wake at any minute and you know things are difficult…"

"Derek, son, it's ok. You don't need to explain, I just wish I would have been here sooner for you," Carolyn stressed as she walked further into the room and rested her hand on Derek's shoulder as she sat in the chair beside Derek's, next to Meredith's bed. "I know things are difficult between Meredith and I, I take full responsibility for that but you are my son and I will always think of her as my daughter and those are my grandchildren she is carrying, regardless of what has happened in the past."

"I know Ma."

"How is she doing? Amy said that the doctors are not as worried now?"

"Given the circumstances she is doing amazing. There were concerns that the pressure in her brain was too high and that they would have to perform surgery to relieve it. The pressure has come down on its own though, over the course of the day. They were worried about her blood pressure too, it has been really high which was putting a lot of pressure on her heart and for a while it seemed like the only option left to reduce it was to deliver the twins, but by some miracle just as they were preparing to move her back to the OR to conduct a c section her blood pressure began to fall."

"Thank God for that. Well you know if there is one thing that could be said about Meredith it is that she is one hell of a fighter."

"She is that alright."

"Son she is going to come through this just fine; both her and the babies. I suppose I had also better warn you that Nancy is here and has cornered that young doctor, Arizona."

"Usually, you know I would groan at Nancy interfering but given the circumstance we will take any help offered. I think Arizona has it under control, she is going to be amazing in her field. You know she isn't even the head of the department?"

"She isn't? Wasn't she the one who sedated the twins during Meredith's surgery?"

"She was and you know that she developed that procedure all by herself but Dr Lucy Fields heads up the OBGYN department, she is also Meredith's doctor. However, Arizona has been covering for her due to Lucy having to fly back home to look after her mum, following a stroke."

"Oh dear, I feel sorry for Lucy of course but Arizona seems to be doing an outstanding job for Meredith and by the sounds of it the OBGYN department is in safe hands."

"It is and Meredith really likes her too and I trust her."

"That's good dear. It's one less worry for you. How have Ellis and Thatcher been with you?" Carolyn asked, changing the subject.

Derek didn't miss the look of hurt that passed over his mother's face; he could only presume that it was because Ellis and Thatcher had been informed about the accident before her. "Surprisingly they have been ok. Ma I know you are upset that they were here first, but it wasn't me that called them, the Chief had to call them. With Meredith and I not being married, Ellis and Thatcher are her medical proxy."

"I am surprised that Meredith didn't change that over the years, but I suppose it's only natural. After all, no matter what, they are still her parents."

"Oh I hardly think that's the reason. Ma you know Meredith was married right?" Derek asked; as silly as it seemed, it was obvious that he was still struggling with the thought that his Meredith had been married to someone other than him and he was quite bitter about that fact.

"Of course dear," Carolyn said gently as she rubbed Derek's arm.

"Well whilst she was married her husband was obviously her proxy and since his death, she has returned here permanently, we got back together, there's Lia and then of course the pregnancy; it must have just completely slipped her mind."

"That's completely understandable, saying that she has been through a lot this year is an understatement." Carolyn lent forward and gently placed her hand on Meredith's arm. "Don't worry though son, I am sure that it is something Meredith will promptly fix once she wakes up."

"Oh you bet it will be fixed," Derek stated as he pulled out a box from his pocket and handed it to his mom.

"Oh Derek, it's beautiful and perfect for her," Carolyn gasped as she took in the elegant diamond ring. She had always hoped that one day she could pass on her own engagement ring to Derek, to give to his soul mate but giving his strained relationship with his father and how Meredith currently felt about her, it wouldn't have been a good move to make.

Derek suddenly let out a bitter laugh. "You know the stupid thing is that I have been carrying that damn thing around in my pocket for a few months now. I, more than anyone, should know to always live in the moment, that life can change in an instant and happiness can suddenly be taken away without notice." Derek let go of Meredith's hand that he had been continuing to hold as he angrily swiped away tears as they began to form.

"Oh Derek," Carolyn stressed as she too let go of Meredith's arm, turning and embracing her son, pulling him into her chest, just as she had many times when he was a child and throughout the difficult period he went through when he lost Meredith the first time around. "Listen to me, Meredith is going to be just fine, you are going to get to put that ring on her finger and the two of you will get your happy ever after."

"I shouldn't have been a coward mom. I should have just asked her the same way I should have stood up to Ellis and Dad," Derek hissed as he pulled out of Carolyn's embrace, not wanting to be comforted by her.

"Oh no you don't," Carolyn warned him. "You were barely an adult Derek. If anyone should have stood up to them, it should have been Thatcher and I. I was selfish though and just wanted to protect my baby; all I could see was you being thrown in jail and both yours and Meredith's life being destroyed but you know what they say about hindsight being 20/20 vision. Looking back now I wish every day that I could go back and change the past. I wish that I would have fought Ellis, sought legal advice instead of just allowing her to railroad that poor girl into making a decision that she will carry with her, her entire life." It was now Carolyn who was brushing off tears. "We all lost so much that day Derek, I never just lost a grandchild but I lost two children as well. You were never the same after Meredith left but I have seen that spark back in your eyes on the few times I have seen you since she has returned…"

"Ma," Derek tried to interrupt.

"No son, you have nothing to feel guilty about. I don't blame you for choosing to abide by Meredith's wishes. I only have myself to blame but I swear to you I only went along with them because I was concerned about you, about your future and what Meredith's future would be like should you have been put in prison. Derek, she was only 16 years old but there is not a day that goes by now that I did not wish that I took her from that house; if the worse came to the worse and you were thrown in jail I would have helped you both through it but at the time I couldn't think like that, all I could think about was that I was going to lose you and your life was going to be destroyed by Ellis. I thought of Meredith like she was one of the family, I had known her practically her entire life but that day Derek I had to choose, you or her and as ashamed as I am to admit it I chose you, your life and that was the only reasoning behind me going along with Ellis. I swear that I never did it to protect your father's career; I could not have cared less about it but I can't expect Meredith to forgive me, she trusted me and I let her down Derek, I let you both down."

"Oh Ma," Derek embraced his Mom. "I know you did what you did for me and I know one day Mer will come round. You just need to give her time."

"I really hope so son. I do love that girl like my own and I want to be a part of my grandchildren's lives and I am talking about Lia too. Like Ellis, I want a chance to get to know my granddaughter as well." Carolyn suddenly felt Derek's body stiffen in her arms. "What is it son? You don't think she will let me play a part in Lia's life?"

"It's not that Ma. It's just you reminded me that Ellis is spending time with Lia and I really do not know how that is going to go down with Meredith."

"I must say I was surprised to see Lia with Ellis when I met Amelia in the cafeteria."

"I didn't really have a choice, I have no legal claim over Lia. If Ellis wanted to, she could take Lia and there would not be a single thing that I could do to stop her."

"Oh dear lord, you don't think she will, do you?"

"I don't think so, not now." Derek shook his head. "At first she was intent on taking guardianship of Lia but when I introduced them Lia convinced me to let her stay with me. Ma, she called me Dad for the first time…"

"Oh Derek, that's wonderful," Carolyn beamed with delight.

"Even if she were my biological daughter Ma, I don't think I could love her anymore. She was very close to Matt, her father, and I didn't think she would ever feel close enough to me, to call me Dad."

"Children are very resilient, sometimes they just need time to adjust and I know I only just met her, but son once she learned that I was your mommy she kicked up a storm talking about you. It is very clear that she adores you."

"I bet Ellis wasn't too impressed," Derek chuckled.

"Well actually you would be surprised there Derek, Ellis actually told her some stories about you and Meredith and the whole time we were with them she didn't stop smiling. It was weird; it was as if I was talking to a stranger."

"It's Lia, Ma. I swear she is a miracle worker. When she first met Ellis it was as if she melted the ice queen on sight."

"She is absolutely adorable and so much like her Mom. She reminded me of when Meredith was her age," his mom smiled.

"Not only are they alike but they also have the same personality," Derek chuckled.

"I wish you luck then son because you will need it when she hits her teenage years." Carolyn said as she joined in and laughed with Derek.

"Oh thanks Ma," Derek continued to chuckle. He didn't mind though; he would love and cherish every moment. "How did she seem Mom?"

"She seemed happy dear, she was enjoying being the centre of attention and I can tell you that past aside, that little girl seemed very much to be the centre of Ellis and Thatcher's world."

"That's what I saw too Mom. You know she has actually been helping Lia…"

"I thought you said that Meredith hasn't had any contact with Ellis since she turned 18 and that she had never even met Lia before?"

"She hadn't but apparently Ellis was friends with Meredith's Chief of Surgery at the last hospital she worked at. He was feeding her bits of information on Meredith's life and kept her informed about what was going on with Lia's illness. Of course I am positive Meredith never knew about this but Ellis apparently pulled strings, called in favours and made numerous surgeons give a consult on Lia even when they had no intention on operating. She made sure that Meredith continued to have hope, even when at that time in her life there was none. You know Dr. Hahn wanted to deliver the twins in order to give Meredith a better chance of surviving the surgery on her heart and Ellis could have given permission for her to do so. We would have lost them Ma but she didn't, she made her attempt the surgery first without delivering. It's thanks to Ellis we still have them with us and the way she has been with Lia, I really think she has changed and maybe deserves a second chance, not just for her sake but for Lia's too; she deserves to know her grandparents."

"You're right; everyone deserves a second chance in life, even Ellis Grey. I have no doubt that she loves Meredith and yes she hasn't exactly shown it in the past, but I think she has learned from her mistakes. I know me and your father certainly have…."

"Ma, please don't bring him into this," Derek pleaded with her.

"Derek dear, I understand your anger towards him but it's time to let go, you are talking about giving Ellis Grey a second chance and it sounds like you think Meredith should too. I know your Father has made mistakes but they are in no way any worse than the ones Ellis made. How can you even begin to think of asking Meredith to forgive Ellis and allow her to be a part of Lia's life when you won't even consider giving your father a second chance? You have given Ellis the chance to redeem herself, at least give him the same chance too. Think about it son…"

[B]Thank you for reading, love it or hate it as always I am eager for your comments, nothing motivates me more to write.