Phineas and Ferb

The New Adventures of Phineas and Ferb

Episode 45: Driving Miss Candace

Episode Summary: After another one of Dr. Doofenshmirtz's goes astray, all of the kids of Maple Drive end up falling in love...with Phineas, and Isabella. So it's up to them and Ferb to snap their friends out of it before it's too late. Meanwhile, Candace goes out to obtain her driver's license. But somebody out there doesn't want her to get it and sets out to do whatever it takes.

Disclaimer: Phineas and Ferb does not belong to me. It belongs to the two geniuses Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh. Keep up the good work, gentlemen!


There's just so many days of adolescence vacation
'Til adulthood and old age come to end it,
So the problem for children of this generation,
Is finding a good way to spend it
Like maybe...

Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy,
Or climbing up the Eiffel tower,
Discovering something that doesn't exist,
Or giving a monkey a shower
Surfing tidal waves, creating nano-bots,
Or locating Frankenstein's brain,
Finding a Dodo bird, painting a continent,
Or driving the adults insane

This could possibly be the best day ever,
And the forecast says that tomorrow will likely be
a million and six times better,
So make every minute count
jump up, jump in and seize the day,
And let's make sure that in every single possible way,
Today is Gonna to Be a Great Day!


The sun arose up and another day was upon the Tri-State. Ferb was the first one out of bed, a feat that usually belonged to Phineas, but slowly began Ferb as the summer progressed. He was up at his usual 7 AM wake up call and proceeded downstairs for his breakfast. Phineas, however, was different. Even with Ferb's alarm clock going off, Phineas slept right through it, as per ordered by Isabella. But it wasn't like he had to try to sleep through it. He was out like a light, dreaming away on his side of the bed.

Isabella awakened not long after Ferb. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and looked over her shoulder and saw Phineas still out cold, with a smile on his face, hugging a pink teddy bear in his arms, the teddy bear she had given him the night before in an effort to keep him calm and happy. She thought the way he slept was both cute and attractive, and simply loved being next to him and snuggling with him. She reached over, wiped some drool from his mouth, and gave him a long, sweet kiss before getting out of bed and writing him a little note, leaving it on his dresser. "See you later, Phineas. I love you." She called out quietly to him as she sneaked out through the window, though he didn't hear her. He simply tossed and turned in his bed. She chuckled as she left the room.


Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!

Meanwhile, Dr. Doofenshmirtz, who was already awake at this hour, was busy with a little spring cleaning of his evil inventions. "Toss...toss...keep...toss..." Dr. Doofenshmirtz wanted to empty out his closet of old inventions, all of them bringing back memories. Like any good hoarder, he had a hard time parting with any of them. "Oh, look, it's my old Age Accelerator." He noticed, as he pulled out the giant device with all his strength. "Boy, I forgot how heavy this thing is." He strained as he put it down hard on the ground next to him. "That's a keeper." He continued to dig through the closet.

"Sir, look what I found." Norm, from across the room, shouted as he held up another one of Doofenshmirtz's inventions. It was his Termite Controlling Helmet.

"Oh, I've forgotten about my Termite Controlling Helmet." Doofenshmirtz remarked. "Toss it."

"Okey-dokey." Norm did exactly what he was told, and tossed the item away. He scrounged through more items and came across another, Doofenshmirtz's old Eulg, a glue-like substance that breaks items apart. "What apart this?"

"My old Eulg! I was wondering where I put that. You know what? I should keep that. You never know when it might come in handy for an arts project or an evil scheme or something of that sorts. Put it in the "Keep" pile."

"Roger that." Norm obeyed and placed the object in a separate pile along with some other things Doofenshmirtz had decided to keep.

"Oh, hey, look at this." Doofenshmirtz exclaimed happily and then held up a small bomb-like device. "It's my De-Love-inator 2.0-inator. I thought I had dismantled this. Ah, such good times. Such painful times, too. This one's going in the "Toss" pile."

"Allow me, sir." Norm stood up immediately, grabbed the bomb, opened a window, and threw it out.

"No, no! That's not what I meant, Norm! Do you realize what you have just done? That was my De-love-inator 2.0-inator! Once it hits the ground, it could very well cause the people of the Tri-State Area to fall in or out of love with each other. So who knows what could happen?"

"Isn't that a good thing, sir? For you, I mean."

"Well, it would be, except I didn't plan any of that to happen today. Doing evil is only fun if I actually plan it and it goes my way."

"Well, aren't you a little baby." Norm mocked.

"What did you say?"

Norm believed that Dr. Doofenshmirtz meant he didn't hear him, and didn't realize it was a sarcastic and somewhat offended tone. He pulled out a megaphone and stuck it in Doofenshmirtz's face. "I SAID "WELL AREN'T YOU A LITTLE BABY!"

"Ow, that really hurt my ears."

"Sorry, sir. But you should really pay more attention when I'm talking."

"Shut up, Norm."

As for the invention itself, it landed on the ground right below the building. The force of the impact was enough to completely shatter the device, but before it did so, it unleashed one final sonic wave that blanketed, or rather, was supposed to blanket, the entire Tri-State Area with feelings of love and/or hatred to each other. Instead, however, it only affected a small group of people: The children of Maple Drive, or at least, a select few of them.


Back on Maple Drive, Phineas was just about to awaken from his slumber. It was only 8:00, but by now, Isabella was long gone, out to her Fireside Girls meeting, which Phineas would soon learn of. He opened his eyes, rubbed them, then noticed the letter on his dresser. He took it and read it aloud. "'Had a Fireside Girls meeting to go to. Will be back at 9 o' clock, but this shouldn't be a problem since you'll probably be sleeping in by then. Take care of yourself. Love, Isabella. P.S., Love you, cutie-pie.'" Phineas blushed and smiled as he put the note away and slowly got out of bed to make his way downstairs.

Downstairs, his mother, father, Candace, and Perry were eating breakfast. (Perry, of course, on the floor.) "Good morning, guys." Phineas said cheerfully.

"Well, look who's well-rested and optimistic again." Lawrence said; Phineas let out a chuckle. "I was starting to worry that you were never going to wake up." He joked.

"For some reason, Isabella has been trying to prevent me from waking up at my normal time. I'm usually up by 7 and it's almost ten past 8."

"I'm sure it's just because she cares about you and wants you to be healthy."

"I know that. And even know sometimes, she can be a bit overprotective, but I can't help but love her for that. These last few days have been rough on me. But I am feeling a lot better now."

"You look a lot better now." Linda remarked. "Ferb's already outside. He wouldn't tell me what he was doing today."

"Probably because he doesn't know, yet. I'm usually the brains of the operation, and he's usually the brawn. That's why we're such a great team, the two of us. I can't wait to get out there and get to it. So, Candace," He turned to his older sister, whom he loved very much. "What are you planning to do today?"

"Mom's taking me to the D.M.V. so I can finally get my license." She replied.

"But I thought you already had her license."

"I wouldn't let her get it last summer because her obsession with you and Ferb was making her crazy. So crazy, in fact, that she almost got me killed whenever I tried to take her out driving."

"Jeez, she obsessed about us that much?"

"Sometimes, it wasn't even about you guys. Sometimes, she was just peeved at me."

"I said I was sorry, Mom."

"No need, sweetheart. I just hope you get your license today. But we better head out now. Last time I procrastinated until the last minute, I paid for it." Both Linda and Candace put their plates in the sink, grabbed their stuff, and headed out the door. "Bye, guys. Enjoy your day. Oh, and Phineas?"

"Yeah, Mom."

"Don't do too much, today. We don't want a repeat of yesterday or the day before, do we?"

"No, Mom. I promise I'll take it slow today. Ferb and I are probably just going to build a massage robot or something like that."

"OK then. Take care." Linda closed the door behind her as she and Candace left to get the latter her driver's license.

As they both got into the car and drove off, they passed by the home of the Brown-Tubbs family, and looking outside the window was none other than Donna Tubbs, the woman who previously plotted to frame Candace and get her sent away to prison. She clenched her washcloth tightly, emptying it of water in the process, and gritted her teeth. At that moment, her husband, Cleveland, came into the picture.

"Whatcha' looking at, Donna?" He asked sweetly before he laid his eyes on Candace. "Oh, I see. Honey, you've got to let this go. She's a different girl now, and you need to accept it."

"You're an idiot if you buy into that baloney." Donna snapped, turning to Cleveland and glaring angrily.

"Well, uh-"

"She's a crazy psychopath ready to snap at any moment and I have to prove it. My last attempt may have been foiled, but that won't happen again."

"What are you talking about?"

"The only reason she managed to convince everyone that she's changed is because everyone in this town is an idiot! But I know how we can convince them-"

"We? Oh no. No way. Donna, I love you more than you could ever understand. But I will not subject myself to this kind of behavior again. If you're so certain that this is just an act, then by all means, prove it."

"Fine, I will. I don't need your help anyway. I have ways of getting the truth out."

Cleveland left Donna alone to give her some time to think. As soon as Cleveland was out of her sight, she took out her cellphone and dialed a number quickly, ready to get her plan into action.


Meanwhile, Isabella's Fireside Girls troop meeting was just about over, and all the girls were exiting their Fireside Girls lodge. "So, what's the plan for today, troop leader?" Gretchen asked Isabella.

"What do you mean?"

"What do I mean? Come on, Isabella, I mean with Phineas. What's the plan with Phineas today?"

"I don't know. Whatever he and Ferb plan to do, I'll probably help out with?"

"You know, sometimes, I question your judgement, Isabella." Adyson piped up. "I mean, yes, Phineas is extremely intelligent and bright. But, I don't find him that cute, obviously compared to you."

"Say what now?" The fearless, and now slightly agitated leader, turned to Adyson.

"Well, he's got a big nose, weird & spiky red hair, and he snores like an animal in his sleep. When we had that sleepover earlier this summer, I'm sure he would've kept us up all night had it not been for that other thing."

"It only would've kept you up if you had let it bother you. I don't let it bother me. In fact, it even soothes me right to sleep. Sometimes, I wish he would snore even louder than he does now, because then, I would sleep even better. Besides, that's not his fault. He's had sleep apnea practically since he was born."

"You're saying that like you think it's attractive."

"Oh, you have no idea.." Isabella swooned.

"Plus, he's way too skinny for me."

Isabella went bug-eyed on her. "You think he's skinny?"

"Yeah. why?"

"Have you not been paying attention? The past couple of days, he has been obsessed with trying to lose weight because he thought he was fat, and because he started becoming uncomfortable with me saying he had a lot of "junk in his trunk"."

"But you do say that...a lot." Holly reminded her.

"I know, and I mean every word." Isabella swooned again. "He does have a nice butt."

As the girls continued to talk, they had no way to realize that Dr. Doofenshmirtz's invention had suddenly passed over the entire neighborhood, and was about to affect them all (with the exception of Isabella). After being put under some sort of trance for a short time, the girls all came to, and Holly was the first to speak up.

"Well, I don't know about you. But I'm going to go ask Phineas out on a date." She said quickly as she casually tried to stroll out of the scene, but was stopped by Isabella.

"Wait, what did you say?"

"I said I'm going to ask Phineas out."

"But...But why would you want to do that? You know that I'm going out with him."

"I know that. But...you're right. He's really cute."

"I suddenly have the urge to ask Phineas out." Katie responded.

"Me too." Adyson replied.

"OK, wait a minute. You were just saying that you didn't think he was cute at all, and now you want to ask him out?"

"Yeah, I know. It's weird. But it's like my body tingles every time you mention his mere name."

"I get that way every time I see him!" Isabella protested. "You can't joke about this kind of stuff, Adyson. It's a very delicate time for us both. We have very mature, adult feelings for each other, and precious cargo like the stuff he's carrying can't be dealt with lightly."

"Precious cargo?" Adyson asked.

"I think she's talking about his butt." Gretchen chimed in.

"You bet I am. There's only one person who's allowed to touch his tushie as they please, and that person is me. He has told me that many times, because he knows I only do what I do and say what I say because it's my way of admiring it. Tonight, I am going to use his cute, firm, tight butt as a pillow, and I guarantee you that it will be the best night's sleep I will have ever gotten."

"Has anybody ever told you that you're crazy?" Katie asked. "Because sometimes, you are. But, I guess that's what happens when you're in love, and you should be free to do whatever you want with him."

"Not if he goes out on a date with me first!" Ginger shouted as she took off for Phineas's house.

"Hey!" Adyson called, as she and the other girls, including Isabella, took off to follow her.

The girls all ran quickly and soon found themselves in front of Phineas & Ferb's house. The two stepbrothers were in the backyard, working on their newest project: a helmet that allowed them to control objects around them with their mind. "Oh, look, Ferb. The Fireside Girls are here." Phineas said optimistically. "I guess Isabella's meeting is over."

"Hi Phineas!" All of the girls called out simultaneously as they ran over to him and grabbed both of his arms.

"Wow, Isabella was right. You are really cute." Adyson squealed. "Even cuter in person."

"Um..." Phineas blushed madly. "Thank you, Adyson. But...But what about Ferb? He's a ladies' man."

"Yeah, but you're scrumptious." Milly flirted, batting her eyelashes and closing in on Phineas, much to Isabella's chargin. She approached Ferb to console him.

"Sorry, Ferb. I don't know what's gotten into them. One minute, they're teasing me for being attracted to Phineas, and the next, they all want to ask him out." She explained to him. He, however, did not feel left out at all, knowing that Phineas himself was now turning into quite the ladies' man.

"That's quite alright. I already have my heart set on a woman, anyway."

"Come on, Phineas!" Katie called, tugging on his arm. "Let's go to the amusement park. I wanna ride the runnel of love with you!"

"Whoa, lady! That's our ride!" Isabella called, running up to them and shooing them away. "The tunnel of love is our thing, ladies."

"Isabella, what's going on?"

"I don't know, Phineas."

"This isn't over, Phineas." Milly said. "I want to go out with you and I'm not going to stop until I do."

"But Milly, you already have a boy that likes you. Django. In fact, aren't you guys supposed to go to the movies tonight?"

"Yeah. But now I have a crush on you. Things can change."

"Yeah, but..."

"Isabella!" Came a high, screeching voice coming up the street. They all turned around and saw Baljeet running up their way, with a bunch of flowers in his hands. "I knew I would find you here!"

"Baljeet, you're just in..." She was interrupted abruptly when Baljeet shoved the flowers in her face.

"Do you like these flowers? I picked them out just for you."

"Oh. Uh, they're wonderful, Baljeet. But you know how I feel about Phineas, and you know how insecure he can be sometimes when other guys try to flirt with me."

"Isabella! Isabella!" Another voice came, this time, it being Buford, holding a box of chocolates in his hands. "I brought you a box of Belgium chocolates!"

"Um, why?"

"Because everybody loves chocolate."

"Buford! You are stealing my thunder!" Baljeet yelled. "I got here first, and I am trying to woo Isabella over with these flowers."

"Flowers aren't the way to go, nerd! Chocolate is the best medicine for love."

"And what do you plan to do should she be allergic to chocolate?"

"I don't know. I'm not one to usually go exchange gifts. It's take-it-or-leave-it with me."

"Exactly! You are not fit to be Isabella's boyfriend. I am."

"Guys! Do you hear yourselves?" Isabella shouted in frustration. "You know that I'm only in love with one person, and that's Phineas. Besides, it's not like I can just dump him whenever I want. I've already said and...done things that I'm not exactly proud of." She blushed madly, but also giggled.

"Do not fear, Isabella. That is what church is for. Now take these flowers!"

"No, take these chocolates!" Buford shouted louder than usual. "They're tasty! You can actually eat them, unlike those lame flowers Baljeet is trying to give you!"

"OK, that is it! It is go time, buster!" Baljeet threw the flowers on the ground and attempted to tackle Buford. Unfortunately, due to Buford being much stronger than him, he was knocked down easily, giving Buford the upper hand, as he belly flopped on top of him, causing the two to break out into an all-out fist fight against each other. All of the girls, Phineas, and Ferb backed away slowly, not wishing to get involved in Baljeet & Buford's little bout.

"Boy, something strange is really going on here." Isabella remarked.

"I'll say. I didn't realize that all of your Fireside Girls had a crush on me."

"Actually, I'm not so sure. See, when we were leaving our meeting, Adyson was bagging on me about how she didn't think you were as cute as I gave you credit for. Something out of the ordinary is definitely happening, and it's up to us to get to the bottom of this."

"You're right. It definitely seems perplexing that all of a sudden, all of the girls have a crush on me and all the guys seem to have a crush on you." Phineas said to Isabella.

"You know what I think? I think this is all just some practical joke they're trying to pull on us."

"How do you figure?"

"I don't know. But I don't see any other plausible explanation."

"I say we play it by ear. See where this thing goes, and if it starts to get out of hand, then we'll step in and try to get them under control. Agreed?"

"Agreed!" Isabella agreed.

"Agreed." Ferb was soon on board as well.


Meanwhile, Candace and Linda had their own problems to deal with. Linda had driven her to the D.M.V. office so Candace could take her much-anticipated Road Test, so she could finally obtain her driver's license.

"Are you nervous about this, honey?" Linda asked as they entered the building.

"No way. I've been preparing for this for weeks, and I am ready for it." Candace said, with a look of determination in her eyes. Upon entering the building, they made their way to the nearest open counter to sign in and get Candace ready for her appointment. What they didn't know, however, was that before they had even arrived, the guy at the desk had received an anonymous call, a call in which he was bribed, or rather, blackmailed, into intentionally failing Candace during her test, even if she performed beautifully.

"Hi, we're here for a Candace Flynn." Linda said to the guy at the desk.

"Let me see." He typed some commands into his computer and pulled up his appointment schedule, and saw that Candace Flynn was indeed the next appointment. "Please turn in all the appropriate paperwork." Linda pulled Candace's MV-285, which she received for completing a Driver's Education course the summer before. "Thank you. Now, please wait in the waiting area while I ready your vehicle. I will call you when we're ready for you."

Linda took Candace over to the waiting area to wait for her driving test. Unbeknown to her, the man was actually heading out to begin his work to sabotage her test. As he was approaching the car that Candace was going to be using, his cellphone rang. "Hello?"

"You know what to do." Said the voice on the other line. (Donna Tubbs)

"Yeah, but I'm not sure I should be doing this-"

"Look, pal! I'm paying you for this. If you chicken out, I have other people who would be willing to do this. There are plenty of other people who hate this girl, you know."

"OK, OK. There's no need to get aggressive. I'm doing it. I swear." He got down on his knees and got under the car. With his bare hands, he started disassembling the car so the brakes would not function properly, which would ultimately result in a potential deadly crash. "The brakes have been disabled."

"Good. Now make sure that whatever you do, you make her nervous enough so she does everything wrong."

"Fine. And then you'll pay me?"

"Just do it, chump!"

He groaned and hung up the phone. Taking a deep breath, he proceeded to get in the car and bring it around for Candace. But, realizing that he had just disabled the brakes and by doing so, he would have insured his own demise. So, in a frustrated effort, he was forced to push the 4,000 pound car to the front door. Not only did that require a lot of strength, but it also required a lot of patience, because it took him quite a long time to push the car up to the door.

Once he had finally done so, he dusted himself off and re-entered the building. "Candace Flynn!" He called, and the girl approached the car slowly. "Do you have your learner's permit with you?" She took out her learner's permit, and showed it to him. "Alrighty then." He pulled his shirt collar to relieve some stress as the two of them entered the car.

Candace buckled herself into her seat, adjusted her mirrors, her seat, & the steering wheel, and in no time at all, was ready to take off and earn her license. "OK Ms. Flynn, please exit the parking lot and head down the street."

"Certainly." She replied confidently. She inserted the key into the ignition and started the car, though it didn't start up right away. It made some noises that indicated that it was possibly stalled. Luckily, though, this only last a few seconds, and soon, the car was running like normal. "There we go." Candace took in a deep breath, gripped her steering wheel, and slowly pushed down on the accelerator. The car went at an easy and reasonable speed, with Candace navigating it out of the parking lot. Luckily for her, there was absolutely no traffic going either way on the street, and the light was green, so she was free to go in without worries.

"Take this street up and then...turn right at the first intersection." The instructor said after a brief moment of silence. He was terrified of giving Candace any more instructions, for fear that something dreadful may happen and that neither one of them would make it out alive.

"Got it." Candace was going at a very safe 20 miles per hour. But when it came time to turn at the intersection, Candace's attempt to slow the car down using the break was thwarted, as she soon discovered. "Hey, something's not right with the brake."

"What? What do you mean?"

"What do I mean? I'm pressing on the brake and the car's not slowing down."

The instructor slowly began sweating. He feared telling Candace that he was responsible for disabling the brakes because he could not risk his job. "Obviously, you aren't doing it right."

"Not doing it right? There's only one way to do it. Push down on the brake, and that's what I'm doing!"

"Young lady, you will not raise your voice to me."

"What is wrong with you? The car's not working properly and you're criticizing me about raising my voice? We have to do something. Otherwise, we're going to be doomed!" By now, she had not realized that she had passed the intersection she was supposed to turn into. "You have a cellphone. Call somebody! Call 911!"

"You missed the intersection. I'm going to have to penalize you for that." He took out his clipboard and started writing, keeping a stern look on his face. Even though externally, he looked like he was a careless, ruthless driving instructor, internally, it was killing him that he was being forced to keep his mouth shut about the car. "Why don't you call 911 if you're so concerned."

"Because A) I have to keep my eyes on the road, and B) driving while talking on a cellphone is a felony and I don't have time for prison."

The instructor faked a smirk. "Wimp." He muttered, which made Candace even more upset with the instructor, though she hid it very well and was able to maintain her composure.

"OK, since it's obvious we're not stopping anytime soon, it looks like I'm going to have to keep going straight or else I might crash into something."

"That would be a good idea."

"Oh, so now we're on the same page!"


Back in Maple Drive, Phineas, Ferb, and Isabella had managed to shoo away the girls, Baljeet, and Buford, who had recently become stricken with love (all thanks to Dr. Doofenshmirtz). They now had the difficult task of figuring out why they had all suddenly fallen in love and how to reverse it.

"What are we going to do?" Isabella asked, distressing. "I can't let any of the girls steal you from me, Phineas."

"Don't worry, Isabella. I told you I only have eyes for you."

"I know that. But, I'm just worried, you know. After all, the two of us have reached a very deep level of intimacy with each other where we do things that are possibly too mature for our age."

"What do you...oh, oh! I get it. I see what you mean. Well, no worries. Ferb and I are on the case." He held up the helmet that he and Ferb had been working on. "We've been working on this since this morning. It was supposed to be a helmet that allows you to control things around you by stimulating your brain cells. But now, we're turning it into a hypnosis helmet, that will hypnotize whoever we want around us to do whatever we want."

"Sounds cool. But do you think it'll work."

"There's only one way to find out. Let's go find-"

"ISABELLA!" Came a voice from the distance. Phineas, Ferb, and Isabella turned around to see that it was Irving running up towards them, as well as Django. Irving was holding a nicely wrapped box in his arms, while Django was holding a piece of paper. "There you are, you cutie-patutie, you!" Irving squealed.

"Oh no, not you guys, too." Isabella groaned, cupping her eyebrows.

"Look, Isabella. I made a portrait of you." Django remarked, turning the paper around and revealing a nearly flawless drawing of Isabella in her natural state. The colors were perfect, the shading was gorgeous, and the decor was fabulous. "See?"

Isabella gasped. "Oh my gosh, that does look like me!"

"So you like it?"

"Uh, y-yeah I do. B-But Django, sweetie, I can't accept it. You guys know I'm in love with Phineas."

"Yeah? So?" Irving blinked.

"So you guys can't just run up to me baring gifts with you expecting me to just dump Phineas."

"So what? It's not like Phineas would ever be able to do this kind of stuff to you." Isabella went bug-eyed as Django took a small step away from Irving.

"Ooh, you probably shouldn't have said that." Django said, raising his portrait of Isabella to protect his face.

"Why?"

"Look, you little nerd-ling!" Isabella hissed, slowly edging toward Irving. "Phineas might not be the most romantic boy in the world, but he is the sweetest and most thoughtful. He cares about me and wants to be near me 24/7 so I can give him as many hugs and kisses as I want. Plus, as if that weren't enough, he is downright attractive! If you were a girl, you wouldn't hesitate to agree with me."

"Uh..."

"Looks, guys, you just have to accept that Isabella and I are in love. Now come on, put those things away and leave us alone." Phineas said firmly, which turned Isabella on.

"Ooh, I love it when you use that bossy, uptight tone of yours." She squealed. "It really brings out your physical attractiveness."

"See what we mean, Phineas?" Django joined in. "She doesn't really love you. She just loves your body. I would give you only emotional love."

"So, you're asking me to be your boyfriend?"

"What? No! Ew, that's gross."

"Alright, this is getting way out of control." Ferb took the helmet from Phineas and put it on his head, turning it on, and in an instant, subliminally hypnotized Django & Irving to "fall out of love" with Isabella. Once they awakened from their trance, they exchanged looks at each other, and at the other three before finally looking back at what they were holding in their hands.

"Hey, what am I doing with this present?" Irving asked.

"You were about to profess your "love" to her by giving her whatever it is you're holding." Phineas explained.

"Oh. Well, that just wouldn't do. You're in love with her, and I couldn't take that away from you."

"Well, unfortunately, you guys aren't the only ones. All of our friends have been acting weird. Just a little while ago, Buford & Baljeet were over here trying to smother Isabella with romance."

"Yeah, and all of the Fireside Girls were trying to drag Phineas out on a date." Isabella joined in. "We gotta find them and snap them out of this."

"I saw Buford giving Baljeet a wedgie in his backyard." Django responded quickly.

"Then let's go. There's no time to lose!"


Meanwhile, Candace had set herself up for a course of nothing but pain and suffering. Due to the "questionable" malfunctions of her car, thanks, in part, to Donna Tubbs, she was forced to continue driving straight or risk crashing and sustaining injuries. It was during the drive that the instructor had received a phone call from said woman.

"Hello?"

"I knew I couldn't trust you."

"What are you talking about? I did what you asked. The brakes are disabled." He whispered so Candace wouldn't hear him.

"I know what. But I see how she's driving. She's going so slow I think a snail just passed her."

"You're exaggerating."

"And she's insane. But since you won't do anything about it, I guess I'll have to do it myself. Put her on the line."

"A-Alright." He slowly handed the phone to her. "It's for you."

"Can't you see I'm driving? I can't talk to your friend."

"Fine. I'll put it on speaker." He did so and turned the phone towards her, holding it up.

"Hello?"

"Miss me?"

Candace gasped in shock. "You!"

"You may have gotten me the last time, but this time, you won't be so lucky. See, underneath that car o' yours is a bomb that I'm about to set off. But don't worry. All you have to do is keep the car going at a speed of 40 miles an hour or faster. If it drops below that for even a second..."

"You animal! You won't get away with this!"

"You have 10 seconds."

The line went dead, and Candace immediately crushed (metaphorically) the gas pedal, getting the car up to over 50 miles an hour. Luckily for her, for the next few miles, there was nothing but open road to drive on. No cars in sight, no traffic lights, no nothing. It seemed like there was no possible way that Candace and her driving instructor would be harmed, until...

"Uh oh." The instructor looked at the dashboard and discovered something horrid.

"What uh-oh? I don't like uh-oh's!"

"I just remembered that I forgot to fill the car up this morning." He pointed to the fuel gauge, noting that the needle was close to "E". "We're almost out of fuel!"

"Shoot!" Candace banged her hand against the horn in frustration, then checked the speedometer. It read 49 mph. "We're already starting to lose speed. And it doesn't look like civilization is around for several miles."

"And my cellphone just lost its last bar." The instructor said, shaking his cellphone to get more reception. "What the heck are we supposed to do. The last piece of civilization was 20 miles back!" Somehow, Candace had managed to drive them completely out of the Tri-State and into a wasteland.

"Then it looks like we're heading back to town!" Candace shouted quickly as she spun her steering wheel all the way around, turning the car all the way around and heading back to civilization.

"What in the name of Sam Hill are you doing?" The instructor shouted, scared half to death.

"I'm getting us back to town. If we can draw some attention our way, maybe somebody will come and help us."

"Or they'll just call the cops on us and call us crazy."

"That's a chance I'm willing to take." She pushed harder on the gas pedal and significantly increased their speed. By the time they had gotten back into town, Candace was driving at a dangerous 60 miles per hour, and immediately after reentering town, attention was drawn to the car. In a panic, everybody started screaming and running around in circles. Some even contemplating calling the police, but, since none of them knew the story at all, the police would have simply assumed that Candace was back to her crazy ways.

Luckily, none of them actually did call the cops. The driving instructor called the police, and explained to them what was going on, and within moments, nearly a half dozen cop cars were on the tail of Candace & her instructor. They followed them all over town, and as soon as it hit the news, Donna Tubbs was delighted.

"Good afternoon, I'm Tom Tucker."

"And I'm Joyce Kinney." (A/N: In the Family Guy episode "And I'm Joyce Kinney", Diane Simmons, who, if you've been following, is dead, is replaced by a co-anchor of the same name) "Breaking news. What started out as a simple driving test for a young Candace Flynn has turned into a fight for her life. As we speak, Candace Flynn is driving frantically around the Tri-State Area, with reports of an explosive device attached to the bottom of the vehicle, which could go off any minute."

"Should the car slow down too much, the device will go off and..." Tom ran his finger across his neck and made a slicing sound with his mouth. "...that's the end of her. Police are following close behind in an attempt to defuse the bomb or at least get her and her driving instructor out of the vehicle before it goes off. The master mind behind this elaborate, yet clearly ripped-off-from-the-movie-Speed scheme is still unknown."

"We'll have more information as it becomes available, but first, we go live to Asian reporter Trisha Takanawa for more information. Trisha?"

Meanwhile, from her house, Donna was watching the news unfold, and was shocked to find out that the cops were not actually blaming Candace for the situation or pursuing her. Instead, they were trying to help her. "I can't believe this!" She shouted to the TV. "They're showing sympathy to her. They're supposed to be framing her for this! That was my plan! Alright then, if these cops won't do it, I will!" She stood up and angrily stormed out of her house towards her car.

While she did that, Candace continued to maintain her cool as she drove around the Tri-State Area. Pretty soon, she heard a voice coming from the squad car behind her.

"Candace! Can you hear me?" Candace could hear the officer shouting from his patrol car through the radio.

"Yes, Yes I can!"

"Do not worry!' We're sending some experts from the bomb squad over to you to see if we can't get the bomb defused in time!"

"Send over some fuel, too! We're on E!"

"Loud and clear!"

One of the patrol cars sent out a cop car on a roller pad in an attempt to defuse the bomb that was under the car in time. He rolled out quickly and efficiently, with no trouble getting under the car. Finding the bomb and defusing it, however, was a different story. For one, the bomb itself was so small and the wires were so small that it was nearly impossible to detect the bomb. Second, once the bomb was found, it was so complicated to figure out. There were thousands of wires all over the place and of many different colors, some of which almost seemed made up to him. There was no set timer programmed in the bomb. Instead, there was a digital read out of the car's speed, which was currently 46 miles per hour.

The officer rolled out from under the car and approached the driver's seat. "I can't defuse the bomb!"

"Then give us some gas! We're on "E"!"

"We tried, but none of the gas stations would provide us with any fuel."

"Did you explain to them that this is a life or death situation?"

"Yes, and they still wouldn't believe me! Your only chance is to escape this car before you run out of gas! Don't worry, we'll help you!" The officer rolled back to his squad car, and subsequently drove up into the other lane right next to Candace. "Alright, we're gonna send a plank over for you guys to walk over. If we're gonna get this to work, you guys have to be quick. So, turn on the cruise control of your car."

"It's disabled! I already tried it!" Candace shouted.

"Alright. Then speed up as much as you can, then get ready to jump!"

"Got it!" Candace slammed her foot onto the accelerator and sped up the car past 70 miles an hour. By now, all of the streets had been warned of the looming danger and were advised to clear the streets. One person, however, chose not to listen.

Up Maple Drive, near her house, Donna Tubbs decided to teach Candace a lesson once and for all. She parked her car right in the middle of the street, blocking it off. This way, if Candace were to drive down the street, she would be forced with a decision: continue driving and risk a crash, or try to stop and blow up. As if on cue, Candace did end up coming down Maple Drive.

Having exited the town, she was now heading up Maple Drive with the cops right beside her. They had set up the plank so it reached the now open driver's door. "OK, the plank is ready! Let go of the accelerator!"

Candace obeyed slowly. Then, she unbuckled herself and slowly started making her way down the plank. Immediately, the car started slowly down, dropping almost 10 miles per hour in less than 10 seconds. Candace, though, was quick on her feet and able to get across. The driving instructor would be the difficult challenge.

"Come on, man!" The officer yelled to the instructor. "You've already slowed down! Remember, if the car goes below 40, BOOM! You'll be blown to bits."

"I know! But I'm scared. I don't have great balance."

"It's alright. We're here! Just start walking!" Candace yelled at the top of her lungs, holding out a hand for him to grab once he made it across. Slowly but surely, the driving instructor stepped onto the plank and made his way across. At one point, however, he lost his balance and almost fell off, and it was only after Candace grabbed him and helped pull him back up and into the car. By then, the car had slowed down so severely that it had gone below 40 mph, and had finally exploded.

But it wasn't a big explosion, like everybody was anticipating. It was a smaller explosion, and simply turned the car over, did some damage, and had it end up on its tattered roof. "Whoa, that was close." Candace remarked as the cop car stopped just in front of Donna's car. They all exited the car calmly, with the exception of the instructor, who was fuming.

"You!" He shouted to Donna. "This is all your fault!"

"Why, Jeffery, whatever do you mean?" Donna sarcastically and arrogantly replied.

"I'm talking about the fact that you forced me to disable the brakes in the car, and the fact that you leaked our gas tank, and the fact that you're the one who put that bomb under the car!"

Donna snorted loudly. "Can you believe this guy?"

"Now, hold on, lady. This is very serious. If he is telling the truth, you're gonna be in a world of trouble."

"There's no way he can prove it was me."

"No, but I can convince a jury. Here." He quickly took out his cellphone and handed it to the officer. "I got 2 calls from Donna today, and I saved them, so you can listen to my conversations with her."

"W-Wait, you can do that now?"

"Yeah. It's a Blackberry. What did you expect?"

"H-Hold on a minute. Let's not get too hasty here."

"What's the matter? Afraid you're gonna get caught because you're guilty?" Candace mocked, both angry at the fact that it was Donna who did and joyous at the fact that she would be punished for it.

"No! It's just that...that...OK, OK! I admit it!" She gave in, seeing that there was no way out. "I did it!"

"I should've known. I can't believe that you would actually go out of your way to kill me just because you-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, child. Let's not get too hasty. I wasn't trying to kill you. I only put in a small explosive device. My plan was to blow the car up and make it unusable for good. The worst you probably would've gotten was a broken arm. But, the resulting explosion would've caused the police to think that you were responsible for it. Then, you would go to jail, never get your license, and once and for all, everybody would see that you're still the same, crazy girl you've always been!"

"Wow, you couldn't be more off-base with that. She was perfectly calm the entire time." The officer retorted.

"I'll say. I was the shaky one." The instructor agreed. "In fact, I think I may have even wet myself."

Candace and the officer both made faces with that statement. "Dude, we could've gone our whole lives without knowing that."

"And just for the record, Miss Tubbs, if it weren't for your little stunt today, she probably would've passed her driving test. But unfortunately, now we have to wait for another car to become available." He turned to Candace. "Sorry."

"That's OK. I can wait."

"You know, I would've gotten away with this, too, had it not been for you meddling kids!" She pointed past them to prove her point, only to reveal that the entire Scooby Doo gang was standing there, with puzzled looks on their faces.

"Like, why do we always get blamed?" Shaggy responded sadly.

"Yeah. We didn't do anything wrong." Fred agreed. "This is what we get for being a multi-billion dollar franchise, I suppose."


Meanwhile, Phineas, Ferb, and Isabella had tracked Buford & Baljeet down and had de-hypnotized them into falling "out of love" with Isabella. Now, all that was left was Fireside Girls troop 46231, and they were, conveniently, at the Fireside Girls lodge. They busted the door down (not literally, of course) and intruded on their meeting, which, unfortunately, was dedicated entirely to Phineas.

"The jig is up, girls!" Phineas yelled. "We know what you're doing! We know that you all have suddenly developed a crush on me. But let's face it. I'm in love with Isabella! I'm here to snap you girls out of it."

"Out of what?" Holly questioned.

"Your trance."

"We're not in a trance. We're serious."

"Yeah, we love you, Phineas." Katie shouted.

"We want to hug you, kiss you, talk about girls, play sports, that kind of stuff." Adyson ranted.

"But if you did that, you'd be stealing him from me, and that would be breaking the honor of the Fireside Girls." Isabella explained, and a bit smugly, too. The girls, however, were not phased.

"Yeah, Isabella, we talked about that." Gretchen explained. "And the thing is...we don't really care."

"What? Are you girls really that insensitive?"

"Not insensitive, just in love."

"Let's get him!" Melissa, the youngest of the group, shouted, as the girls all charged up to Phineas. But Ferb, who thought quickly, turned the helmet on and snapped it at the girls, all sending them into an "afterphoto" (if you will) trance. Once the trance broke, the girls blinked twice and then looked around. "Hey, what's going on?"

"Why do I suddenly feel like I've been spending today chasing a boy I had no chance with?" Holly asked, visibly confused.

"Because you were, girls. You had suddenly gone head over heels for Phineas."

"We did?" Adyson asked. "But that can't be. I already told you I don't find him as cute as you do, Isabella."

"You...You don't?" Phineas blushed as his face fell and backed up a couple of steps. He was offended that Adyson would just come out and say something like that.

"Don't worry." Isabella turned to him. "I promise I'll explain everything later. I'm just glad that we got this figured out before it was too late."

"Me too." Phineas replied, walking up to Isabella and giving her a hug. "I couldn't stand the thought of somebody else possibly going out with you."

"Same here. Now, come on. Let's all go home. We've all had a long day." And so, the kids all made their way out of the clubhouse and back to their respective homes. The adventures of love-induced kids was over, and now, Phineas & Ferb had the rest of the afternoon to think of another activity to do for the following day. And after returning home, there was only one thing left for Phineas & Ferb to do.

"Oh, there you are Perry."

End of Episode 45!

A/N: Sorry if it seems like I rushed the ending. I was going to put in a musical number, "Boyfriend" by Big Time Rush, but then I decided against it at the last minute. Anyway, Candace's subplot is a parody of the movie "Speed" starring Sandra Bullock & Keanu Reeves.

Next Time: After a routine visit to the museum, Phineas & Ferb end up in possession with one of the most dangerous & most powerful artifacts of all time, and risk unlocking a legendary prophecy.

Expected Update: Check my Profile Page for a date.