Emma
I didn't bother to hide my feelings toward Killian. But Henry started to catch on my odd behavior from the past two days. I feel horrible for him to concern of that, but I can't help it. It's so hard to see Killian and be near him..After him being with other women, it hurts that he comes back to me later on.
Before Killian went to work, he informed me that someone is going to come over later on to help me with my dress and pretty me up. He left without kissing me goodbye. Marjorie came after lunch and played a little with Henry upstairs.
I snuggled on the couch staring blankly at the black screen of the television. What will happen now?...Maybe I should start looking for a place outside of New York? Maybe in Storybroke. Or arrange a settlement with Killian?
Someone knocked on the door. I went over to the doorway and looked through the peek hole. Huh. I can't take any more surprises anymore. Its Jefferson. He's holding a wrapped dress hanging on a clothes hanger and a makeup box on the other hand.
I gulped hard and unlocked the door. I took a breath before opening it. Jefferson smiled. "Hello, Emma."
I stepped aside for him to come in. "Come in."
He walked in and looked around the house. "Wow. This place is beautiful."
"Killian decorated the place up." I crossed my arms across my chest and tried my best to keep my distance from him.
"Well, I picked your dress for you. And don't worry I picked comfortable shoes for you to wear. Flats are something that isn't a big sacrifice for you, right?"
"Yeah. Thanks for being so thoughtful...Urm..So how does the dress look?"
"I picked a good for you. Do you have anyone who can help you change?"
"Yeah I have a friend."
"Perfect. Let's get started."
~ It took twenty minutes for Marjorie to get me in the ridiculous huge dress. The dress is black and has a puffy ball gown skirt that's patterned with dazzling black beads. The bodice is strapless and has a black see through veil sewn around the waist. When I got out, Jefferson clapped his hands in approval.
"You look beautiful."
I literally have to grab a handful of the skirt and drag the heavy material across the floor. "Yes, beautiful. But really really heavy."
He walked behind me and straightened the skirt. "Try to be careful. This is a thirty thousand dollar dress, custom made."
Huh. Men and their money. Usually my reaction will be like surprised or gasp with my jaw ajar. But now I want to let it go. There just doesn't seem to be a way to stop them to throw their money away on something I will never use again.
"Nice."
He walked in front of me and handed me a large red and black diamond necklace, the diamonds are heavily attached together in the middle, forming a crooked triangle. I put the heavy jewelry on as Jefferson attached the black chandelier diamonds on my earlobes that matched the necklace.
"You look absolutely gorgeous."
"Thanks. How long is this ball?"
"It doesn't have a time, Emma. Just leave whenever you want...But try to stay there till twelve since Killian is your date. He has many clients to attend to."
I nodded. "I see...Well, how about you be my double date?"
He lifted an eyebrow. "A double date? I shall be delighted, Miss Swan."
I smiled and took his hand. "Jefferson, but before we go any further, we have to talk." I pulled him to the couch. When he sat down, it took me bit of effort to do the same. The skirt practically covered us completely as if its swallowing us alive.
"Jefferson..Are you okay with all this?"
He nodded with a sad expression drawn on his face. "I understand completely, Emma. I was foolish to think that the two of us could be together."
"Don't say that."
"But its true, I should have known better."
"Don't blame yourself."
Then Jefferson told me how Killian came to his place and explained to him about my secrets and how Killian wanted to help me out.
He placed a hand on top of mine. "I never in my life saw Killian behave that way. It felt strange but somehow heartwarming to see that man crack away from the hard shell. I'm glad you two are very happy."
I didn't smile and gritted my teeth tightly by hearing him say that. Jefferson caught my reaction and patted my hand. "What's wrong? Is something going wrong between you two?"
Should I tell him? Jefferson knows Killian better than me. He could help me answer my question. But can I bear to get him involved with my problems again?
I nodded.
"What's the matter?"
I gulped hard, and as hard as I fought, tears rushed down my cheeks. "I can't be with Killian anymore."
Jefferson wiped my tears away and urged me to continue. "Milah came to the house. She told me about his women and how he still meets them that after we got the house and got everything else settled..She asked me how could I still say I love him after what he did and what he still does. I can't admit that I really can't say that I love him anymore."
"But you don't know for sure if he is cheating on you."
"Nobody knows, Jefferson. I told Milah I can forgive in time. But now I think of it, I can't forgive it at all. Whether ten or fifty years pass, how can I face that man or live in the same roof as him after all the women he banged and toyed with...Am I just one of his girls? A number? Is that what I am a damn number?!" I dug my fingers in my hair and almost lost myself before I reminded myself that Henry is upstairs with Marjorie.
Jefferson wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Emma, hang in there…Killian is a player. I know. But he's willing to change. Of course, it'll take you some time to accept him for the sins he caused. But don't let his past prevent you to go further to him."
"Its not just his sins, Jefferson...How can I be with Killian and let him be with my son? Henry thinks of Killian as a good influence, a fuck'n God who can make anything possible. I sometimes fear now if Henry might turn that way."
Jefferson shook his head. "Emma, now you're taking this too far."
I sniffled and nodded. "I know. I know. But how can I deny it, Jefferson. Oh god I feel..I feel so disgusted and somehow used when I imagine of what he does...He's laughter and he's voice joining with another female's voice..moving one house to the next. Booty calls...How can I accept that? Even by time. How can I actually accept that, Jefferson?"
~~ The ball is quite overwhelming. There is nothing but reporters, photographers, and over thousands of dollars worth decoration outside of the building.
It took Jefferson an hour to do my hair, he carefully braided one side of my hair and sided it smoothly to a perfect bun. He painted my lips a light glossy pink with a little powder on my cheeks, and for the final touch, he placed the hat he gave me for my birthday on my head and lowered the fish net veil down to half my face.
The red carpet is almost like the one I saw the first time I went to Killian's club with Jimmy. But this one is beyond more crazy and crowded. Jefferson was by my side but I was later taken away by Killian. Killian wrapped his arm around my waist the whole time. Although, it's a little uneasy being so close to Killian again, I have to support him, for both his company's sake. So I played my part and acted as perfect as I can manage for the cameras.
We took a few pictures before one of his employees came to our side and gave us our masks. I helped Killian put his mask on that encouraged the photographers to hungrily take even more pictures. Killian smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I clutched on to my mask with my hand as Killian and I took more pictures before going inside.
Immediately, Killian was taken away by hundreds of guests. I walked away and stood in a corner while many of the other guests stared at me. Jefferson finally came in the room. He looked good in his silver grey suit and the golden mask that went well his outfit. As waiter passed by with a tray of glasses of champagne, he took two glasses and came to my side.
I took the glass and took a slow sip.
"You might want to take off the hat."
"Why?"
"It's sort of a rule. Its respectful to take it off when you're inside."
"But I like it."
"Now Emma, the hat was only for the cameras. Although, I am glad you like it personally, its time to say goodbye to it." He snapped his fingers at a nearby waiter.
The waiter came to our side.
Jefferson took the hat without bothering to ask me and straightened my hair. "Put this away, please. Under the name of Miss Leah Arton."
He took the hat and left.
I smirked. "Leah Arton. Ah. What an interesting name for me, Jefferson."
"Its for a good cause. After you took your pictures with Killian, the media are now dying to find out who you are. We have to take all the precautions we can manage before they find out." He took a long sip of his champagne.
"I see."
I spent the next two hours walking one room to the next, going on the elevator couple times for fun and later go to where Killian is. Jefferson spoke to a few guests but he always returned back to me. Many of the men in the room tried to introduce themselves to me, hoping to catch my name, but I declined on every one of them. I don't feel flattered, just irritated that many of the men just want an amusing competition.
Apparently, I'm not the only one who became the center of attention, over dozens of women popped up beside Killian's side and he doesn't seem to dismiss them away. I literally crossed my arms across my chest, leaning against the wall beside the piano, just staring at him. He can see me if that old man with the old brass pocket watch moves aside. But he doesn't seem to want to. I can feel my heart break one piece at a time by watching him laugh with the women and taking their hands.
Milah came up to me. "I wasn't surprised when I saw you here."
"And I'm not surprised you're still talking to me."
"I just want to talk to you for a moment, Emma. So what do you think? Do you believe me now?"
I nodded, my eyes not leaving Killian. "...I guess I'm unfortunate to end up with a player. Thanks for the warning."
"Don't thank me. Thank yourself for now stopping to deny the truth..This is no fairytale, Emma. The house you're living in may seem like that, but its just all covered up with secrets and lies. Just let him go and you'll be saving a lot of pain and confusion."
"I know, Milah...I know. Excuse me."
She took my arm. "Wait. Emma, if you ever think of leaving, remember I know nothing about it."
I wiped my wet eyes and nodded. "Whatever." I yanked her hand off me and walked quickly away.
I passed the bar stand and clumsily bumped into Jefferson. He was holding a glass of whiskey, but its no longer full and the contents are all over his coat.
I gasped. "I'm sorry Jefferson."
He wiped the drink off him. "Its fine. I never liked this suit anyway."
The two of us walked over to the bar, and the bar tender gave us a handful of napkin. I dried off the front part of his coat, but made no effort on erasing the stain away.
"I'm sorry."
Jefferson chuckled. "Hey, the day we first met, I ruined your most expensive dress. This incident makes us even."
I gave him a weak smile. "Okay. If you put it that way."
"Want a drink?"
I turned around to find Killian. He's still where I last saw him, talking endlessly with the group of young women surrounding him. I faced Jefferson again and sat on the stool. "Yeah. Lots."
Everything was free here. So I just simply asked for two bottles of whiskey with no glasses. I wrapped them up with a white towel and I sneaked outside of the building up in the roof. Jefferson followed behind me to be my special drinking buddy tonight.
I popped open the bottles and we drank them up. I never really like whiskey. But once I passed to six gulps, my taste buds changed to bitterness to sweetness. Now one bottle doesn't seem very much, but if its whiskey, its big enough to knock down three people in less than a hour.
Unfortunately, the alcohol was too strong and Jefferson and I ended up dozing off there, barely alive. The whiskey wore off after an hour later. But the two of us were still drunk. No matter how much my throat burned and my stomach screamed for me to stop, I chunked straight down on the bottle. Even though, by looking at me I look like as if a three year old ghost took over me, but inside my head, the alcohol somehow brings me into a mental focus about Killian. He's never going to change. He's never going to resist any beautiful young sexy women...I'm just not going to be enough. Ever.
Jefferson woke up and shook me awake. "Emma we should go."
I smiled groggily and wrapped my arms around his neck. "Go where? To your place? Sounds perfect."
He smiled back and patted my back. "We have to go before Killian kills us."
I flew my hand up in the air. "Oh who cares about that no good Irish player? Let's just go somewhere. Come on Jefferson."
"Okay. But how are we going to get down?"
I pressed my palms against the wall and clumsily pulled Jefferson up with much effort my body can manage. It was challenging but fun to get downstairs and head to the driveway. I threw my arms around Jefferson's neck and he lifted me up in his arms.
The employee in the valid stand drove the two of us personally to Jefferson's place. We smiled and laughed at the awkward silence before we arrived. The driver helped us get upstairs and into Jefferson's apartment. The driver placed me down on the couch and Jefferson on the other couch beside it. He bid farewell and left the room.
When he was gone, the alcohol kicked in and made the two of us stand back up in our feet. Jefferson took my hand and we danced like children and twirled around until our feet gave in.
I landed on my knees and laughed so hard I slapped the floor with both my hands. Once I recovered I sat up straight, and tucked in my hair between my ears. "Huh. Jefferson-n-n-n I'm tired."
He nodded me too. He took my hands and lifted me up. He laughed when I fell straight back on the first try. He lifted me up and I gasped in amusement. Jefferson kicked his legs in the air and marched into the bedroom. I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Yeah! Go! Go!"
He kicked open the door to his room and tossed me on the bed. I rolled over and giggled as I stopped on top of my belly. Jefferson suddenly took off his jacket and kicked his shoes off. I looked at him, still with a smile.
"Good night, Princess Emma!"
I nodded and curtsied a clumsily before landing back down on the bed. "Good night, Knight Lancelot. The king of all nations of hats."
Jefferson kicked the door shut and the lights turned off.
Whatever you guys are thinking after reading the last sentence, you'll find out what will happen soon. HeHEheHe. Stay tuned my friends. (okay that was creepy) Byeee.
