Still no copyright. Song for this chapter is Another Rainy Night Without You by Queensryche.
"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas", written by Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane, 1944
Their first family Christmas was, like the rest of their lives... unusual.
Six humans, a Godling, four Omni's, an Aetherling and the 3 unique children. Gloria, Charlotte, Dwight, Dave, Vince, Jacob, Mara and Audrey, Nathan, Duke, Duo, Alec, Ren, Aaron and Lizzy all crowded around the living room of the Rouge, laughing and drinking eggnog, listening to the Christmas music Duke had playing. Echo ran around with the kids, taking turns chasing and being chased.
For Mara, it was so bizarre it bordered on unreal. Past, present and future all gathered together in their home, eating the lovely buffet Duke had made.
'Can you believe how much our lives have changed?'
'Mara, I honestly still think I'm dreaming half the time. Nothing seems real. We have all this family, we have each other. When I first started hearing you, hell, from the first time I met you, this is not where I ever expected us to be.'
'I keep watching Alec, he's so astounded. Sometimes I wish I could see the world the way he does, with innocent eyes. It must be amazing.'
'I can't wait to watch him and Lizzy open presents.'
Nathan kissed the side of their head. "How are you two?"
Audrey smiled back, rubbing his knuckles. "We're happy. Just reflecting on how much has changed."
Duke grinned, wrapping his arm over her shoulder so he could tickle Nathan's neck. "You're not exaggerating. We've got kids and friends. We can fix people. Nate lets me touch him in public. It's pretty awesome."
Nathan reached over and flicked Duke's ear before squeezing the back of his neck. "I let you touch me in public all the time. Just not all the same parts."
Duke snorted. "Almost all the good parts are on the 'restricted' list. So maybe I wanna grab your ass when we're out. Audrey and Mara never complain."
"It doesn't make them jump like a crazy person, either."
"You know that's half the fun, Nate."
They started to play-fight, the girls stuck in the middle, and Audrey said, "Knock it off or I'm not sitting between you anymore. I swear, Alec is better behaved than you two and he's a child!"
They stopped fighting and Duke leaned in to whisper in her ear. "I'm not a child. And I could think of way better places to focus our energy." His fingers traced softly up her thigh, and she smacked his hand, hissing, "Not with an audience!"
"Why, you afraid they'll get jealous? They should be jealous."
"You're a bad man, Crocker."
"One of my many charms. You still feeling okay from earlier? I'm afraid of setting your recovery back."
Mara's voice answered. "Actually, we're kind of horny. I wouldn't mind stepping away from the festivities for a few minutes." Her grin was wicked, and she squeezed both men's thighs. She was just reaching to kiss Duke when the song changed.
So innocuous. 'Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas'. But oh, Mara despised that song. She pulled back, her spine ramrod straight as she stood, rushing to the bedroom to just escape, to make the sound go away. Duke was two seconds behind her, Nathan right behind him. Nathan locked the door behind him, seeing Mara in the corner, arms wrapped around herself. He exchanged a look with Duke, approaching her slowly. "Mara, what is it? What's wrong?"
She could feel the snow increasing outside and she tried to get control. "That song. It was there in the Sarah times, in the Lucy times, always, always, and it's not fair. The fates don't allow if we'll all be together! We have to fight for that! We have to fight all the fucking time, and we always lose, because you can't trust fate! Fate doesn't keep you safe, it doesn't make people love you or save you!"
For once, Nathan understood first, closing the gap to wrap his arms around her, murmuring into her hair. "You're right, it's not fair. Some days it feels like we can't get ahead. It's scary. But stop and think, look around yourself. You're not alone, you've got me and Duke and Audrey, and we have those amazing kids."
Duke had stepped close, a hand on each of their backs. "And all those people out there, they've got their issues, but we could do worse." He nuzzled her ear, making her laugh softly before he continued.
"You're right, we don't rely on fate. That would make us lazy and complacent. We know, we understand that because we're still here. Despite everything we've had to deal with, we're here and we're stronger than we were before. Something you've gotta learn about being a Crocker, we're stubborn."
"Pigheaded." Nathan amended.
"Almost as mulish as Wuornos." Duke sniped back.
Mara shook her head. "Knock it off, you guys. I get it, I get it. I just- sometimes I get these weird things that trigger me, and I go into 'fight-or-flight' mode. Being with Audrey, it's not my first instinct to fight all the time. So I run. That and I don't like to let other people see it."
Nathan tilted his head. "See what, Mara?"
She looked down, narrowing her eyes at her feet. "The things that make me weak. Once a person knows your soft spot, they can always hurt you. And they do. They always do."
"Not everyone." Duke's tone was fierce and he wrapped his hand around the back of her neck. "Not when we're together. You know this. Hell, you're what made this possible. How do you still not see that?"
"Wasn't me, it was Ren."
"And what made Ren possible, Mara?"
"Unprotected sex." She answered immediately and decisively, and both Duke and Nathan snorted with laughter.
"Yeah, well, there's that too, but I was thinking you. If I hadn't been with you, we never would have made Ren, and none of the rest of this would be possible." Duke swatted her on the ass.
She looked very thoughtful for a moment. "So, you're saying having a lot of unprotected sex fixes everything?"
He shrugged. "It's worth a try. We should do it a lot though, just to be extra safe."
They all laughed together and Mara's muscles relaxed. "I'm fine. I'm good. Still hate that song, but I'm good."
Nathan gave her another searching look. "You're still anxious around your mother, aren't you?"
Mara stretched her neck. "500 years of one feeling doesn't go away overnight. I forgive her, but yes. My first instinct is to fear her. I'm controlling it. I know she was trying to help people, I do. I wish she'd listened to me, but I understand her reasoning. I hate that Daddy left me to hang, but it's over and done with. I've washed my hands of him. I pray that James is happy there, that maybe he can bring some good to that place, but my father... no, I'm done. My family consists of the people on this boat. Nothing else matters."
Duke grinned. "You're sexy when you're confident. Makes me want to get you pregnant again."
"No way, next one is mine, Duke." Nathan objected as Mara rolled her eyes.
"As the owners of the uterus in question, Audrey and I declare there will be no calling 'dibs' on our reproductive system, and that we're not even thinking of planning another baby until Ren is done nursing."
Duke's smile turned devious. "That goes against your 'lots of unprotected sex' policy. I'm looking out for our safety, here."
Mara and Audrey considered with narrow eyes. "Fine. Spontaneous. We'll leave it up to the gods. But still no calling 'dibs'."
They all relaxed, laughing, and they each kissed each other for a moment before rejoining their guests.
The next few weeks passed in blissful peace, something they just weren't used to in large doses. Jacob spent about a quarter of his time staying with them, the rest with Dwight, Charlotte and Lizzy. Nathan and Duke were enjoying watching his acclimation to modern life, so much that it was like a reality-TV addiction. One of them, and they never would say who, started calling it 'Doctor Hendrickson' and every time they referred to Jacob as a Time Lord, he looked confused, irritated and slightly concerned, as though afraid they'd suffered some kind of head trauma.
Honestly, they tended to get that look from a lot of people.
None of them were sure how long it would take William to heal, but Mara always warded herself with Aether at bedtime just in case she fell asleep first. The first three weeks after the incident, they left the Rouge often; taking walks, shopping and just enjoying freedom. The people in town fawned over Alec and Ren everywhere they went. In some ways, it almost felt like when Mara had first come to Haven. They were welcomed everywhere, and people came to them often to ask for help. They didn't even get much small-town head spinning about being in a polyamorous relationship. They'd helped too many of these people, nobody felt like judging them, though Mara and Audrey did catch a lot of disgruntled looks. Like it was their fault they'd managed to catch the two best men in town.
Someone- and they were certain they knew who, though Vince and Dave insistently denied their involvement- had started make Maze stickers, and they were appearing on all the local businesses. A 2x2 inch square, it decorated the bottom right of every store window; a sign that the Gifted and Troubled were both welcome. They had cured and repaired so many people that Troubles were no longer the town's worst-kept secret.
That honor had passed to Vince and Dave. Vince was rapidly approaching the 'serious' stage of his relationship with Alexis, and times had changed so much since he and Dave had been young men, they were suffering their own brand of culture-shock. One memorable day Audrey received a 911 text from Dave and rushed the kids to the Herald. They had run in, one man carrying each child, to see the men sitting peacefully at their desks- Dave had just gleefully pointed at Vince, who apparently hadn't noticed the huge hickey on his neck.
Duke was so busy taking pictures that they hadn't even bothered reminding Dave what a real emergency was.
Dave was playing the field a little more, trying out several dates, unable or unwilling to seek second dates. They weren't sure if he was just looking for the right person or if he was so used to holding out for them that he didn't know how to be with anyone else. As hard as it was to watch, Mara still wanted him to find happiness with someone.
Nathan, Audrey, Duke and Mara had their first New Years together, and yeah, maybe they were only awake for the midnight kiss because Ren was up for a feeding, but they had a newborn and a six year old, they were allowed to go to bed early sometimes.
And they were already arguing about Valentines Day.
Mara was insistent that it was a 'fakey, made-up corporate holiday' and wanted absolutely no part in it.
"No, I'm serious. It's insane. You don't take one day in a year to show your partner that you're in love with them, then treat them like an old sweater the other 364 days of the year. We don't do that. We find ways to show how much we love each other every single day, in a thousand different ways."
They were on the deck of the Rouge, sitting together to enjoy the small amount of reasonable weather they were allowed in the winter. Mara was nursing a beer, her white tank top almost glowing in the sun, her smile gentle and teasing and dark sunglasses hiding her eyes; paying attention to the men while she tracked Alec's every move. Nathan cradled Ren against him, his grey t-shirt bunched in her small fist, kissing the baby every few minutes and looking insanely adorable. Duke faced them both, his hair flopping in his eyes as he stared at Alec, constantly alert even when he looked relaxed. He was wearing her favorite denim button-up with the sleeves rolled in just that 3/4 way she loved.
"It's romantic!" Nathan defended. "We start new holidays all the time. Mother's Day wasn't a holiday until the fifties, I think. We still honor it. Us included, no argument. Mother's Day and Father's day have got to be celebrated by this family." Nathan pointed around at them as if daring them to argue.
They didn't.
"This isn't about Father's Day," Audrey reminded them. "It's about Valentine's Day. Technically, you're both right. It's a fakey, made-up corporate holiday generated to sell candy and cards, but it's not without merit. A little reminder at least once a year that we need to be grateful for what we have is a start. We should remember every day, but we don't. So why not do it whenever we're encouraged to?"
They had gotten used to switching over control and they had been starting to use that more in group discussions. Mara answered Audrey aloud. "You only say that because your memories are of getting the most Valentines of anyone in your fifth grade class."
Audrey didn't bother denying the claim. "That just proves that it's nice to be appreciated."
Duke raised his hand to silence them all. He turned to face Audrey and Mara directly, his face completely serious. "Mara, let me ask you something. Other than money, what is Valentine's Day supposedly about?"
She sighed, crossing her arms under her breasts. "Other than the commercial stuff? They say it's about love and romance, I guess."
His voice went deep and soft, that sincere, serious tone he so rarely pulled out. "Mara, Valentine's Day is about sex. Yeah, love is mentioned, but it's an adjunct. That's why you get people whining about having nobody to go out with on Valentine's day. People don't say , 'I don't have someone to be married to on Valentine's day', they say 'I don't have anyone to go out with on Valentine's day.' They're romanticizing the sex. Now think about that and tell me there's no space for Valentine's Day."
A whole holiday dedicated to sex? When he said it that way, she really couldn't complain. In fact, there should be more holidays about sex. "Fine. We'll do Valentine's day."
Nathan gave Duke an incredulous look. "How'd you do that?"
"I have a way with languages, you know that." Duke smirked, and Nathan did that tiny smile that meant he was laughing uproariously on the inside.
Mara and Audrey spoke their languages too.
After the resurrections, when she was mostly healed, Mara had finally gotten around to summoning an actual Aetherling to talk to about their clone idea.
It was a Friday late in January. They knew that as Mara healed, William healed, and though he was injured worse than she was, they couldn't know exactly how long they could count on him being out of commission. They were already starting to get edgy about their time off the boat, and were preparing to go back into seclusion again.
Mara had temporarily blocked her connection with Duke just to make sure this Aetherling stayed Aetherling, and as Mara hummed the music of Form a pretty young woman with long brown hair settled into being. She was tiny, built like a dancer, and the girls absolutely knew that Duke and Nathan were thinking about Summer Glau. The Aetherling smiled happily at Mara, squealing as she ran to hug Duo before bending a little to see Ren, curled up and sleeping in their arms.
"How can I help?"
"Please, sit down and make yourself comfortable. I'm Mara, Audrey is with me. That's Duke and that's Nathan, our husbands. This is our son Alec and daughter Ren. You obviously know Duo. I called you here to ask you a question."
"Duo explained about William. I was happy when we found out he can't interact with us anymore. He was terrible. If I can help you, I want to."
"Thank you for that. Right now, we're trying to see if there's a way to create a duplicate of me, just so he thinks he's got an idea of where I am or my habits. I won't lie, you'd be bait. But you know he can't touch you or hurt you. Otherwise I would never ask this. You're absolutely free to say no, and I promise we won't be offended."
The girl looked thoughtful, and stared at Duo for a long moment. "If I do a good job, is there any possibility you would make me lasting, like Duo? I mean, of course, I'll help however I can, I'm happy to. I was just curious."
Just the week before, they had surprised Duo, producing a packet of paperwork- birth certificate, social security card, driver's license and passport, all listing him as 'Duo Crocker Wuornos'. Mara and Audrey handed him the papers, Nathan on one side holding Alec, Duke on the other with Ren.
"I know you don't technically have a 'birthday', but we thought we'd give you one. So today, your naming day, is the date we put on your papers. January 23. We thought you'd rather be listed as 21 than 17. Happy birthday, Duo. Thank you for choosing to stay with us."
He had looked stunned, and when his eyes met theirs, they could clearly see what Jacob meant about Duo being more than an Aetherling. There were tears in his eyes and he had to clear his throat before wrapping his arms around Audrey and Mara, whispering in their ear.
"Thank you. Why would you do this? You knew I was just happy to help."
"Because you're not just hired help, Duo. You're a member of this family, same as the rest of us. You matter as much as anyone, and you deserve the freedom that those silly papers give you. You've given us so much. It's not nearly enough to repay you, but it's what we can do. And we want you to know how much we value you. How much we want and need you with us. How much we love you."
They'd felt his tears on their neck before he wiped his eyes and stood back, looking almost perfectly at ease except for the red around his eyes.
"This is great, guys. Now I can legally drink and gamble. You guys really get me."
And just like Duke, he hid his emotions with a joke and redirect, and they let him. They only cared that he knew how valued he was, and that message had gotten through.
Sitting with the female Aetherling, Audrey spoke to Mara.
'I think she likes Duo.'
'Thank you, Detective. Can you blame her? Besides, if he likes her, it would be really nice for him to have someone like her around. It's hard being completely unique.'
"Of course, if that's what you want. We want you to be happy. If you want to take some time and talk to Duo about it first, that's fine."
Duo came to sit next to the girl, holding his hand out to her. She took his fingers and smiled, the information flowing instantaneously between them as questions were asked and answered.
The girl looked up, smiling brightly. "I'd love to help. I'll look just like you?"
"Until the threat is passed, yes. Then you can look however you'd like. People on the street will call you Audrey or Detective Parker. Duo can teach you everything you need to know. Are you sure you're okay with this?"
"Of course. I want to help."
"Do you need help changing your form?"
Duo cut in smoothly- for him. "Ren's hungry anyway, I'll help her adjust and learn the lay of the land." He put his arm around her shoulders, leading her away.
And so Priya became another family member.
Priya started publicly replacing Audrey and Mara on February first, and though they had borrowed a wireless recorder from Dwight and Duo helped keep an eye on her, they worried constantly the first few days.
But everything had gone fine. So after the first week, Mara and Audrey started going out too, usually with Duo or Jacob for protection. They let themselves be seen, hoping they could lure William into revealing himself. On the seventh day, Stan, who had volunteered to help with the 'Parker Stalker' case called in to report he'd seen William following Priya.
They'd all been a little relieved.
Even when Audrey and Mara would go one place while Priya went another, William seemed intent on following Priya. Mara and Audrey avoided places like the Gull, certain that as a grieving widow they'd be trying to avoid any more reminders than there already would be. That she would already be reminded of their absence with every breath she didn't hear. Sometimes that thought, the possibility that things could have ended so differently, kept them up at night and they lay in the dark listening to the sounds of life. From the occasional snore or muttered sleep-talking to the tiny sounds the baby made just before she woke up to nurse, Audrey and Mara cherished every sound.
But Stan continued to report on seeing William every time Priya went anywhere, and that gave them a small sense of security they desperately wanted. Once Mara had caved on Valentine's Day, the argument morphed into if they should go out or stay in. Mara thought that six weeks was enough time for William to be healed enough to be dangerous. Jacob felt certain that he'd broken enough of William's bones that he would still be weak, that it was safe enough, as long as they went somewhere they didn't usually frequent.
They settled on The Rope Loft again, the only decent restaurant beside the Gull. Priya and Duo went to the park, taking a long walk around the marina where they'd be easy to spot. They got texts from Stan every few minutes letting him know that he still had eyes on William, and after about an hour, the girls started to relax, even having a mojito- though they admitted they liked Duke's better and Mara groused that she'd rather have bourbon.
Alec, Ren, Aaron and Lizzy were safe on the boat with Dave, Gloria and Jacob watching them. Despite the appearance of an age gap, Gloria and Jacob really had hit it off well, and Audrey and Mara were already thinking of ways to alter her to make her young again. The girls had wanted Charlotte and Dwight to have some date time, too.
And maybe the girls had gone a little overboard when they were getting ready- When they put their hair up, they put a long, filed hair clip that could be used as a knife in an emergency. They wore the thigh holster, a knife hidden in the belt around their dress, another in their boot, one pouch of Aether in a pocket and one tucked into their bra. Both men had two guns.
But, such was life in Haven.
They'd actually swept and cleared the restaurant when they came in, just to make sure William wasn't lurking, and Duke and Nathan were each sitting facing a door. Mara was actually a little cranky about the whole thing.
'It feels more like a SWAT mission than a date. Seriously, this is what we're reduced to? Clearing places before we'll eat in them?'
'It's just a precaution, it's a safety thing.'
'I know what it is, I just don't like it. We should just have Stan take a shot at the son of a bitch when he's watching him!'
'As much as I agree, we're not allowed to use police snipers for private matters.'
'Don't need a sniper, I could take the shot with the right rifle.'
'The court doesn't count it as self defense if you're a hundred yards away, Mara! I don't want to go to jail. Not for him.'
'We wouldn't go to jail unless we got caught. And you have Multiple Personality Disorder, they'd put us in the Freddie.'
'Still no. I have terrible luck there.'
'It's a mental institution, everyone has bad luck there.'
Duke grinned at them. "No fair talking among yourselves. Share with the group, ladies."
Mara rolled her eyes. "I was thinking how stupid it is that we have to do all this security, and wishing we could just have Stan shoot him while he's watching him, and Cop Barbie is telling me it's misappropriation of police resources."
Nathan was having crepes- Duke had barely talked him out of pancakes, reminding him that Mara made better pancakes anyway- and he nodded. "Technically she's right. But forms get filed in wrong all the time. I think in this case, I have to side with Mara."
She smirked and raised her glass to him. "It's really sexy when you're the bad boy, Nathan."
He blushed, but his hand found her leg under the table, squeezing. "I guess you two bring out the best and worst in me."
"And we love them both. You two are the best thing that's ever happened to us."
He smiled happily and Mara shook off a chill, glancing around carefully. Nothing looked off, and nobody new had come in. She checked her phone- Stan had just reported seeing William across town following Priya and Duo.
All this caution was making her edgy.
Duke signaled the waiter, ordering her a bourbon neat. "That should help relax you. And I hate to be the reasonable one, but I don't want a sniper. I want to kill him myself. More personal."
Mara gratefully took the drink when the waiter returned, taking a deep swallow. "You make justice sound sexy."
"Excuse me, I make everything sound sexy."
They laughed, and Mara finally let Audrey relax her, eating the bacon-wrapped scallops they'd agreed on. They had a point. They couldn't just stay prisoners on the Rouge until they found a good time to take William out. They couldn't just let him win. The kids were safe, he didn't know about them, and that's all that mattered. The adults could take care of themselves.
As their dessert was served, Mara and Audrey studied their men. Nathan wore a suit without a tie, top button opened, and honestly, when they looked too long they started to drool. He was painfully beautiful when he was happy and relaxed, with the people he loved- people he trusted and knew loved him back, flaws and all.
Duke had let the girls tie his hair back in a leather strap, his black slacks and button-up making his eyes shine, and he had the sleeves just partially rolled, and Mara knew he'd done that for her. The only thing better than looking back and forth was watching as their heads bent together when they spoke, each touching the other's arms, shoulders or necks, their fingers lingering too long. Their wedding rings only made them look more beautiful.
Maybe Mara had been wrong about Valentine's Day.
They toasted to their first married Valentine's Day and Audrey and Mara savored the chocolate lava cake they had ordered, the bourbon making the chocolate feel even more decadent. They were planning how to celebrate the sex part of the holiday that Mara had been promised. Technically, their escapades that morning counted, but a whole holiday dedicated to sex required more than one tumble.
Even if it had been a fucking magical tumble.
Swallowing the last of the bourbon, the girls leaned over to kiss Duke, who groaned and promised to feed them chocolate and bourbon more often. They kissed Nathan, groaning themselves when he trailed his long fingers up their arm.
"If you gentlemen will excuse us, we need to freshen up."
Duke looked serious. "You want one of us to come with?"
Mara gripped his shoulder. "We cleared the entire place when we came in, Stan just texted me that he's still watching Priya and Duo, and we're armed. We should be fine. You guys said yourselves, we can't let him make us prisoners, right?"
"Yeah, you're right. Just hurry back, huh?"
"Alright, alright. Try not to give the patrons too much of show without me. You two look amazing." They'd already had Dwight take pictures of them together, and one was now the background for her phone. They blew their men a kiss and headed for the bathroom, tiny clutch hanging from their wrist.
They cleared the bathroom, gun in hand before they went in, emptying their bladder, washing their hands and fixing their hair. Gun back in it's holster, they exited the bathroom. The small hallway was empty, but they distinctly felt the cold outside air around their feet, and they spun to hurry back to their table and the safety of their husbands.
But when they turned, there was a man in the way and they froze for just a moment as they took in the golden hair, stormy eyes and beautiful smile.
A moment too long.
"Hey baby. Miss me?"
There was the jarring feel of something hitting the side of their face, then darkness.
