Just so ya'll know, I SHOULD be doing my homework on Diabetes right now...but I'm in a Norman loving mood and I feel like writing , so that's what I'll do. Homework isn't due till tomorrow night anyway. :)
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The sound of the rooster's crowing from the chicken coop actually woke Carol up before the sun was even risen, she had always heard of roosters crowing and waking people up but she'd never actually had it happen before. She blinked rapidly in the semi darkness and wondered for a moment where she was until she remembered she was in the RV. That was when she remembered that Daryl was with her and she could feel the warmth of his body pressed up against her from behind, the familiar comforting presence that she realized now just how much she'd missed this past week.
She did her best to stay still and savor the moment, knowing that the second he woke up he would be out the door and off to the woods to hunt and escape the situation he was currently in...she knew he wasn't ready to take her back yet. She had a lot to prove.
Oh, but she wanted to look at him, just to take him in while he lay there in peace and silence with no frown lines or furrowed brow or disapproving, hurt look in his beautiful blue eyes...she wanted to see a glimpse of the happiness she'd been able to give him not so long ago. So she found herself rolling over to face him despite her desire to make the moment last.
She managed to get onto her other side without waking him and she laid her head back down on the pillow, only inches from him. She scanned every inch of his face and her eyes came to rest on his long, dark eyelashes which twitched now and then as he dreamed, his lips were drawn into a tiny, almost unnoticeable smile so she assumed it was a good dream, she touched her nose to his and snuggled closer to his chest. Unfortunately, that woke him and she tried her best to fake being asleep as she felt his breathing pattern change and his heartbeat pick up a bit. She expected him to roll away and bolt, but she felt a thrill in her chest when she felt the calloused surface of his hand push the hair back from her eyes and then trail gently down her face in a familiar, loving way.
"Carol, quit your fakin', I know damn well you're awake," she heard him mumble in his sleepy morning voice. She let her eyes open and admit defeat, the first thing she saw was the blue of his eyes as he stared directly back at her.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"What about now?" he asked, clearly annoyed. "Ya apologize a whole lot, woman."
"I'm always messing something up," Carol sighed, "So I have a lot to apologize for."
Daryl stared at her quietly for a moment more before he sighed and rolled off the bed, standing and slinging his crossbow on his shoulder. Without another word, he turned and walked out of the RV into the darkness of the early morning and headed for his tent across the field, leaving Carol alone once again.
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Carol KNEW she was making progress after a few days. She'd talked over her explosion to all involved and, even though they made it clear to her that Maggie had been referring to Merle, she had clearly laid down the law that she would not put up with the group treating Daryl with any less respect for the last week or so. She'd seen the improvement immediately in how people treated him when he came around, even Lori had a ready smile for him and his shoulders seemed to be drooping less lately.
Carol had begun to take Daryl and Merle their meals in the barn and she always made sure Daryl's plate had more and better things on it, not out of distaste for Merle, although she wasn't exactly fond of the older Dixon after what he'd done, but because she was trying to make a point to Daryl: I still care about you and you mean more to me than anyone else.
She had gone to the orchard and picked a basket of apples with Beth and Maggie and had Lori help her make them into a cider. She'd heated it and poured two thermoses full and took them to the barn, earning delighted looks and hearty thanks from both Dixons. If she wasn't mistaken, she'd even received a small smile from Merle. Daryl had flat out grinned at her when she handed him his...a very good sign.
However, not everyone in the group was getting along so swimmingly. Shane and Rick were constantly in some sort of argument and everyone could see that Shane was becoming slightly unstable...or at least Carol could see it, and she figured it was obvious. Also, Merle had begun to venture out of the barn more often and had started to offer help where he could, trying to begin the difficult process of integrating into the group he'd abandoned and pushed away so long ago. But people didn't seem very eager to accept him, especially Andrea, Shane and Lori. Today, Rick had taken a step in what Carol certainly hoped was the right direction and handed over the axe he had been chopping wood with when Merle offered to help with a tight, forced smile. Carol was walking by an hour later and saw Merle was still hard at it, chopping wood with his left arm since his right was useless in this chore, he was covered in sweat but he didn't look tired at all.
"Merle, would you like some water?" she asked quietly, feeling the need to forgive, forget and move on. This would be a good start. Merle stopped chopping and looked over in surprise, it was the first time she'd spoken to him since they'd met up with him on the road.
"I...sure," he muttered in reply. Carol walked over and handed him the glass of water she's intended on taking to Andrea where she was posted on the RV for watch duty and he nodded his thanks before chugging it down. "Thanks."
"You're welcome," Carol replied simply, turning to go get a new glass for Andrea. She felt a hand on her arm and she flinched, wondering what he was going to do. Should she scream?
"Hey, lady," he said, his voice full of that Dixon gruffness she'd long become accustomed to. She turned to face him and saw he was sporting a look on his face she'd almost call...regret? "I just wanted t' say...'m sorry 'bout what I did, takin' yer daughter and all."
"You should have just come to us, Merle," Carol replied sternly, "Daryl and I could have talked to the group for you."
"I never meant for it t' happen," Merle sighed, "They were suppose t' take Daryl, not yer kid."
"What!?" Carol gasped.
"Figured the group would want their hunter back bad enough to lend me an ear for a minute," Merle shrugged, "When those idiots came back with some screaming blonde kid I had no idea what the fuck'd happened. She told me everything."
"Then you know she's his daughter too?" Carol asked carefully, "And that he and I...?"
"Yeah, lady, I figured that much out by how damn protective he is of ya," Merle rolled his eyes, "He's constantly watchin' ya. Hell, he's probably watchin' right now and he's gonna pull ya aside and want to know what I said t' ya."
Carol actually had to laugh at that because she knew it was true.
"What should I tell him?" she asked playfully.
"Hopefully that I was apologizin' for bein' an ass," Merle stated truthfully.
Carol nodded and even managed to pat him on the shoulder.
"I forgive you," she said softly, "But you better not hurt this group ever again or I'll kill you myself."
Merle grinned.
"I can see why you ended up with m' brother," he laughed, "You don't take no shit, do ya?"
"Not anymore," Carol said with a wink. She turned back around and went into the house to get the water for Andrea.
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Sure enough, as soon as Carol had stepped off the RV after she'd given Andrea the glass, Daryl snatched her arm and pulled her off to the chicken coop. He was livid, she could tell.
"What did he say to you?" he growled, low in his throat.
Carol sighed and crossed her arms.
"Don't you trust him?" she asked.
"Damn it, woman, don't answer my question with another question," Daryl snapped. "No, I DON'T trust him! Do you expect me to after what he did?"
"If you really want to know what he said to me," Carol said soothingly, "He was apologizing for what happened."
That silenced the furious redneck. He stared at her blankly for several minutes until she started to feel a bit uncomfortable and she started to inch away from the wall of the chicken house but Daryl's arm shot out, his hand settled on the wall beside her with a smack sound, and successfully blocked her escape.
"He's up t' somethin' then," Daryl claimed, "Merle don't apologize for nothin'."
"Neither did you once," Carol reminded him quietly, resting her hand on his arm and giving it a squeeze. He looked up at her from where his eyes has dropped to the wood of the chicken coop beside her and he gave her that thoughtful squinty look he had.
"You seriously think he's changed?" he asked quietly, but not sounding at all convinced. "Just...please watch yer back? I can't always be here t' watch out for ya."
"Daryl..." Carol whispered and brought her hand to his face, running her thumb along the stubble along his jawline. "Don't worry so much, it's not good for you."
Daryl's hand caught her wrist tightly and he looked at her sternly for a long moment before he turned his head slightly and pressed a kiss to the sensitive area just below her palm.
"Losin' ya wouldn't be good for me either," he whispered, "So just don't let yer guard down."
Carol stood in silent shock, he'd kissed her...not at all the type of kissing she was craving from him, but a kiss all the same.
"Do you forgive me?" she whispered back, hoping her efforts had finally achieved their goal and won back his affection. "Do you love me again?"
"Woman, I ain't never stopped," Daryl said calmly, "And I told ya I forgive ya...but I still don't know if I can trust ya yet."
Carol nodded silently and he was walking away before she could even get another word out. She watched him go with misty eyes and then slid down the side of the chicken coop to bury her head in her hands once again from the stress of it all. She was full of pent up sexual desire and desire to prove that she would never let him down again...but she had no idea how to earn his trust back.
"Did he hurt ya?" a gruff voice split the silence and Carol jumped in surprise and found Merle looking down at her. She felt a chill run down her spine when she realized there was no one around and she was alone with Merle.
"No," she stood quickly, brushing herself off, "Why the hell does everyone think he's always going to hurt me!?"
"Don't think I didn't see your face that day ya'll met me on the road," Merle crossed his arms and cocked an eyebrow at her.
"God! Is he ever going to be able to live that down?!" Carol threw up her hands in exasperation.
Merle chuckled.
"But from the looks of it, it sure didn't spook ya off," he mused thoughtfully, "You really got it bad for my little brother, don'tcha?"
Carol sighed heavily and nodded, after all it was no lie.
"I love him," she whispered, "But I said some terrible things and I cut him to the bone...he's not ready to trust me again. Not yet."
"He'll come around," Merle shrugged, "He's a fuckin' Dixon, we've got the stubbornness of mules and then some."
Carol couldn't help herself, she found a smile twitching on her lips and she actually offered it to the man who'd kidnapped her daughter.
"How much longer is it going to take?" she asked with a sigh.
"As long as he wants," Merle replied easily, "Daryl sure can brood over shit for a long time."
"That's what I figured," Carol groaned, but then she decided to change the subject. "Merle, are you really honest about changing your ways and fitting in with this group?"
Carol saw something slash in the older Dixon's eyes and he stayed silent for some time before he finally nodded.
"I can already tell it ain't gonna be easy," he muttered, "Not that I blame any of 'em."
"Daryl earned their trust...you will too," Carol reassured him, "It just takes time."
Merle nodded and she could tell he was chewing his bottom lip inside, just like Daryl did sometimes. Man, they were more alike than she remembered...and yet as different as day and night.
"Dixons don't let a little oppositions stop us," Carol stated simply, remembering something Daryl had said a while back when Sophia had a really bad day at the archery range.
"Us?" Merle asked with a grin. Carol blushed when she realized she'd included herself under their family name.
"Sorry," she whispered.
"Hey, you's as much a Dixon as any of us," Merle laughed, "It takes some kinda guts to marry my worthless little brother."
"Stop it!" Carol hissed, anger flared up in her chest and she faced him, her fists clenched. "Do you know how much he believes everything you say about him!? You have no idea how much it took for me to get him to think he was actually WORTH something. DO NOT screw up my hard work, Merle Dixon!"
Merle actually took a small step back and had the presence of mind to look a bit sorry.
"I know," he grumbled, "Old habits are just kinda hard t' break. I don't really think that about him, ya know?"
"Well don't tell ME about it," Carol sniffed angrily, "He's the one you've got convinced otherwise."
And with that, Carol walked off in a fury towards the house to start dinner.
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Carol eyed the delicious looking spread on the table with an approving nod. Venison, fresh from the cow milk, homemade bread and fresh churned butter, carrots with their leafy tops still attached and cooked right up with them and garlic potatoes. She'd maybe gone a little overboard on the small stash of spices left...but why not have a decent meal now and then, spices and all?
She was proud of her hard work, the bread had taken a long time, she'd even milked the dang cow by herself! Everything on the table was made with love and care and she couldn't wait for everyone to enjoy it. Cooking was the least she could do.
One by one, people began to pile into the dining room, praising her cooking skills and sitting down with hungry looks. Daryl's eyes, however, were on her and she saw the smile in them and she knew it was his silent conveying of his appreciation of her culinary skills. The man ate anything, like a damn goat, and she knew he always appreciated when she was able to pull deliciousness out of simple things.
But the homey atmosphere was cut short when Lori's voice rose over the murmur of conversation.
"Where's Rick and Shane?"
Everyone stopped chattering and looked around as if they had possibly missed them in the crowd, but the pair was nowhere to be seen.
"Probably just got in the middle of something," Herschel commented, "Shane said something about doing a sweep of the outer fields, I think they took the truck."
Glenn went to the window and announced that the truck was still parked by the tree and Lori sat there and went pale.
"I have a terrible feeling," she whispered, so quiet that only Carol and Daryl, who had stood to look out the kitchen window in the direction of the northern outer field. He turned around and looked at Lori carefully then he sniffed and headed for the door, grabbing his crossbow from against the wall. Carol followed him out the front door.
"Where are you going?" she asked, her voice sounded slightly panicked.
"Goin' out t' find them," he replied grimly, walking determinedly in the direction of the field he's been looking at earlier. Carol trotted to keep up.
"I'm coming with you," she announced, pulling her hunting knife from the sheath she kept in her boot.
"No, ya ain't," Daryl growled, turning on her and glaring, "Get back in the damn house!"
"You can't tell me what to do, Daryl," Carol replied quietly, yet sternly, "I'm coming with you whether you like it or not."
Daryl growled angrily but he turned and started walking again, faster and much more fiercely than before.
"Why are we going this way?" Carol asked quietly.
"Saw Merle heading this way just before I came in," Daryl replied gruffly, "And when Lori said she had a bad feeling...well, it ain't wise to ignore a woman's intuition."
"You think Merle's going to jump them?" Carol asked, horrified.
"I don't know," Daryl replied, honestly, "But he didn't look like he was fixin' to make friends."
"Why didn't you stop him?"
"I ain't my brother's keeper."
Carol shook her head at that statement. The first guy to ever say that hadn't had the best of luck in life...
"Now, hush," Daryl hissed suddenly and dropped to a crouch. Carol followed his lead and she was shocked at how far they'd walked in such a short time, when Daryl Dixon wanted to get somewhere, he got there with time to spare apparently. They walked silently until Carol heard voices...raised, threatening tones reached her ears and she felt her heart clench. Rick. Shane.
"I'm a better father than you, Rick!"
Carol recognized Shane's voice and Daryl motioned for her to move forward very carefully and Carol was shocked when the field came into view and she saw the two figures. Daryl immediately dropped to the ground on his stomach and army crawled into the bushes, she followed him in the same manner and they watched in silence as the scene unfolded.
Shane had his gun on Rick, who's hands were raised and Carol felt her throat tighten in fear. So Shane had finally flipped, after all his unstable moments he'd finally gone bat shit crazy.
"You're gonna have to kill an unarmed man," Rick stated, his voice thick with emotion. Carol felt like she was going to be sick.
"Daryl," she whispered, "Do something!"
Daryl glared at her, a look that clearly told her to shut up, and she fell silent. He knew what he was doing, she trusted. She gave him a nod and went completely still.
Rick was holding his gun out to Shane and approaching carefully, slowly, whispering words of assurance like you would when you were trying not to spook a horse, but Shane kept his pistol trained on Rick's head, his breathing was loud, ragged, stressed. Carol waited for Daryl to act, but he remained in the shadows, his eyes looking off to his left, towards the woods.
Suddenly, a shot rang out and Carol shoved her fist in her mouth to stifle the scream that almost jumped out, her eyes jumped back to Rick and Shane and she let out a relieved sigh when she saw Rick standing there, eyes wide, but Shane was crumpled on the ground not moving. Rick fell to his knees the same moment Daryl jumped to his feet and dragged her out of the bushes.
"Rick!" he shouted as they ran to where Rick had fallen to his knees next to Shane's motionless body. "Rick are you alright?"
Rick looked up and Carol thought she'd never seen a man look more haunted in all her born days. His blue eyes were spilling over with tears and he didn't say a word, just laid his forehead on Shane's shoulder and began sobbing loudly, anguished and painful wailing filled the air and Carol could only stare in shock and disbelief as a knife fell out of Rick's hand to the ground. Daryl turned at the sound of footsteps approaching and Carol saw Merle walking out of the woods, a rifle at his side. Daryl nodded and Merle nodded back, a silent understanding passed between the brothers that Carol suddenly caught on to.
"What are you doin' out here, little brother?" Merle asked, his voice sounded bitter.
"Same thing you are, Merle," Daryl said simply.
"You killed him," Carol whispered in disbelief. "You shot Shane."
Merle nodded grimly.
"The man was off his rocker," he muttered, "Didn't think it was worth the risk of letting Rick do what he was gonna do. Not when I had a clear shot."
And that was when Carol realized that the knife in Rick's hand was seconds away from being embedded in Shane, his best friend and partner...Rick KNEW what Shane had brought him out here for and he'd been prepared to deal with it. Merle had just saved him from having to gut his best friend.
"You knew I was comin' here then?" Merle asked Daryl, looking surprised, "And you let me go?"
"I didn't know," Daryl mumbled, "I suspected, but then it all just fell into place. Only..to be honest, I figured you and Shane were in this together."
"Thought I was his failsafe?" Merle asked grimly. Daryl nodded and hung his head.
"Merle..." Carol whispered, "You...you just saved Rick's life."
Merle shrugged.
"Do you trust me now?" he asked, his eyes glinting in the moonlight.
Rick stood up at that moment and the conversation was lost. Carol ran to his side and helped him steady himself on his feet. He looked at her with a sad, broken look.
"Merle?" he asked in a whisper. Carol nodded.
"Yes, Rick," she replied, "He knew Shane was up to no good and he followed you out here to keep an eye on things. He...he shot Shane."
Rick gave Merle a nod. Just a simple nod of thanks, and it was enough for Carol to see that something strong had just been established between them. An amount of trust and respect that had taken Daryl months to earn...Merle had just proven himself.
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Well, as much as I like Shane, his death was necessary in my plotline. R.I.P, Shane, we love you even if you were a psychopath.
Send me words via that button at the bottom and I'll try to get the next chapter up soon!
