I watched myself scream. I had a bottle in one hand and a shotgun in the other. I was scared, but the man in front of me was drunk and angry. It wasn't until a woman came out of the other hallway and called him Thomas that I realized he wasn't me.
Thomas was my father.
He looked just like me. Or...I looked just like him. I felt small. Victor never, ever talked about his father. Rachael told me he was a bad, bad man, and I should stay away from him. My Pa came out of his study, and I knew everything would be okay. He stepped into the foyer, talking to the scary man.
Then there was a loud bang, and my Pa fell to the ground. Screaming. High and loud. Pa wouldn't get up. I was in the foyer now too, and my hands hurt. More screaming. Was it mine? So much pain.
"James."
I saw the bad man, the one who hurt my Pa. Screaming again and everything blurred. Then my hands were warm. Wet. I looked up. Saw myself. Not me. Father.
"My...son..."
I stumbled away. So scared. I wanted my Ma, but she looked scared too. Why was she scared? I saved her from the bad man.
"What are you?"
Oh. Ma was afraid of...me. But I was scared too. I didn't know what to do. I wanted my Pa to get up and tell me what to do. A hand gripped my shoulder, and I spun around to see Victor. I nearly cried with relief. He would know what to do. He took my hand and pulled me away, and I ran after him until we were outside. I twisted around and looked at my house.
"I w-wanna go back."
"We can't go back. Not ever."
I sniffled loudly, but kept following him. "What about Rachael?"
He stopped and grabbed both my shoulders, the tips of his claws pricking me. "I'll find her. But we gotta run. And you gotta be hard, Jimmy. So hard the world can't ever touch you. Can you do that?"
I pressed my face into his chest and cried. There were things coming out of my hands and my Pa was dead and my father was bad. Everything was wrong. But Victor hugged me and didn't let go of my hand.
"We're brothers now, Jimmy. I ain't ever gonna leave ya. But we can't stop."
I didn't want to go.
"C'mon, Jimmy."
I wanted my mother.
"Run!"
I woke up with my hands still hurting. Phantom pain. My claws weren't even out, but my knuckles ached. I heaved in gulps of air and tried to stop shaking. The details of my nightmare were already fading, but the emotions weren't. There had been a killer, but I couldn't remember who he was. He looked like me. He probably was me. I had killed my own father, hadn't I?
"Logan?"
I looked over and rolled into Marie's arms. She'd sneaked into my room tonight, not that there was any real sneaking involved. Scott and his bitch fiance had pretty much given up trying to monitor us. Marie ran her fingers through my hair, making soft humming noises. I buried my face in her neck and breathed in deep until her scent calmed me down.
"I killed him." I mumbled.
"Who?"
"My father."
"It's alrah-ght, sugah. That was a long time ago." She whispered.
I sat up and ran my hand over my face. "You don't know what happened."
She sat up next to me. "Yah can tell meh if yah need to talk about it. But yah don't have to."
"I'm a killer, Marie."
"Okay. Yeh also mah mate." She wrapped her arms around me. "Lay back down."
I slowly let her tug me back down, and she cuddled up to my side. She tried to rub her hand over my chest, but I pulled the sheet up first. I had a lot of bad shit in my head tonight, and she did not need a dose of it. She seemed to understand though and pressed a kiss into my hairline where it was safe.
"There was an angry man...screaming at...my mother, I think." I rasped. "And he had a gun. He shot somebody. My dad, but not really. He was my real father—the...the angry one."
"Sounds like yah were jus' trying to protect yeh mother."
"I killed him." I muttered again. "And that scared her. Why wouldn't it, having a monster for a—"
"Hey, don't." Marie said, leaning over me. "That's not what yeh are. Yeh a mutant. Big and strong and powerful, but that's it."
Her hair draped over her neck and down to our pillow, and I turned my head to rest my cheek on it.
"When Ah told yah about mah parents, yah said there was nothing wrong with meh. Yah were jus' protecting yeh family, that's all."
Sweet little Marie-mate always understands.
"Victor got me outta there."
Big brother always takes care of us.
"We ran away together."
Taught us to track and hunt and survive.
"Was that the first time Wolverine came out?" She asked softly.
"Yeah."
Wanna talk to her!
Fine, but I ain't going anywhere.
I gave control over to the Wolverine, but I still stayed at the forefront of our mind, ready to take back over if I needed to.
I looked up at my mate, and she laid back down to hug me, stroking a hand up and down my back. She kept her neck stretched out so I could nuzzle against it, and I purred while I held her close.
"Yah okay too, Wolvie?"
"M'fine." I mumbled. "I know you're right. Was only protecting my pack."
"'Course yah were." She answered in a soft voice. "Do yah wanna talk about it?"
I shook my head. I'd only wanted a chance to see her. All these new people, the males sniffing around my mate, her going off on her own with that pack of teenagers, it all set me on fucking edge. And I'd barely gotten to see her since we got to this human hell hole.
"So what do yah think about mah list?" She asked, changing the subject.
I gave a louder purr and pulled her closer. "Fuckin' love it, babe."
She giggled. "Babe?"
"You aren't a kitling anymore." I said with a shrug. "Haven't been for a long ass time in my opinion. It's the human who's been bitching about the age of consent bullshit."
"Thank yah." She murmured. "...sooo. Does that mean yah'd like to cross a number off too?"
"Hell yes!"
Hell no.
"Why the fuck not?!" I demanded out loud.
The human apparently hadn't gotten that far in his argument, because he stayed silent.
"C'mon, sugah! It's only fair he get a number too." My mate argued.
"We already crossed off a number this month." I pushed out past the Wolverine's control.
"But it's Christmas!" She whined.
Yeah, bub. It's fuckin' Christmas.
...fine.
"He said yes." I told my mate.
She squealed happily and kissed me, and I gladly took the thanks for the human. He didn't deserve thank you kisses just for not being a dick. But when my mate pulled away, she yawned loudly, and I remembered it we'd woken her up late at night. I pushed her head down beneath my chin and wrapped the blankets snugly around her.
"Go to sleep, babe."
"Mmm-kay. Love yah."
"Love you, too."
I had a little under three weeks to fix my truck. Storm had assured me I would get my truck back after I agreed to come here, but I hadn't gotten it actually in the garage until a few days ago. One Eye's beam had hit and cut through part of the doors for about a foot. Luckily, it went through one door, missed everything inside the cab, and hit the driver's door from the inside. So fucked up doors aside, the interior was all fine.
The engine however, had been cut into and was now fucking useless. I had to order a new one, which was another delay. In the meantime, I worked on replacing the hood and welding together the short cut in the frame. Once I got that done, I'd need to replace the doors, the windshield, put in the new engine, check all the electrical wiring, and touch up the paint.
In under three weeks because the goddamn X-Men couldn't get their shit together and get my fucking truck from Okla-motherfucking-homa. As far as I was concerned, Marie was the only good thing to ever come out of the South. But at least I'd have a nice Christmas gift for Marie. She could get her permit and drive around during the winter as long as I was with her in the passenger's seat—and she damn well wouldn't be allowed to have any other passengers—and then she could take Driver's Ed here over the summer to get six months knocked off her learner's permit time.
But first I had to finish up with this goddamn engine that kept fucking—
"Jimmy."
My head snapped up and hit the hood. Why didn't I just leave the damn thing off?! I looked over with a snarl to see Victor standing right beside me. I should've expected it. No one else could sneak up on me.
"What?!"
"We've been volun-told by the council to set up the Christmas tree."
I slammed the hood down. "Why the fuck can't they do it themselves?!"
"Because One Eye and his asshat following are a hot fucking mess, and if shit's gonna get done around here, we have to be the ones to do it." He replied.
I wiped off my face and hands. "They can live without a fucking tree."
"Quit yer bitchin', Jimmy." He growled. "The girls are really into this shit."
"Yeah, where are they?"
He turned and walked away, and I followed him out of the garage. "Your mate is cooking and mine is setting up decorations."
"What's Marie cooking?"
Victor snorted. "You ever think with an organ above your neck?"
"Fuck off."
We hiked out, chopped down a tree, and drug it back. Which Victor could have done all by his fucking self. The only bright side was that Marie relocated to the living room area where we were setting up the tree. Back in the day, it was some sort of sitting room or something, but it had been expanded to hold all of the students for events and stuff because it had a fireplace. Marie had several pans of treats spread out on the coffee table with twenty million different types of frosting and sprinkles, and Jackie sat in the middle of the floor, wrapping presents and loudly singing Christmas carols.
"No, don't put it up against that wall, set it in the corner." I growled at Victor. He carried the tree over to the right corner and set it up there while I supervised. "Why the hell am I even here? You coulda have done all this shit without me."
"Shut up, Jaylo." Jackie said without looking up. "You two setting up the tree is a family tradition."
It was? I tried to remember.
Don't ask me. I don't remember shit 'fore the night we ran.
"Ah think it's sweet that yah two are doing it together." Marie added.
I grunted in response. I'd better get a damn good neck rub for this. Victor handed me a box, and I pulled out a length of those little lights people strung all over the damn place in the winter. Except they hadn't been rolled up correctly and were now just a giant, tangled mess. I sat on the couch with a growl and began untangling. A neck rub and a scalp massage. I felt a little better when I saw Victor had his own box of tangled ornaments to deal with.
"Whose presents are yah wrapping?" Marie asked Jackie.
She finished up wrapping a coloring book and crayons. "They're for the kids, from Santa."
"Oh. Are yah Santa?"
"No, more like an elf. Xavier gave me a list of all the kids here and a shopping budget, so all the kids could get a present, even if they don't have families." She explained.
"The council elected Dr. Skank to do that." Victor said.
"Jean isn't a skank for sleeping with Lames, she's a skank because it was cheating. And she's pregnant, so I volunteered to do it." Jackie replied.
I raised an eyebrow at her. "You volunteered to do something? You haven't even put on real pants since you got here."
"Sweatpants are a perfectly acceptable form of pants." She snapped at me. "And yeah, I'm fucking bored. I don't have school or dance or work, and I'm not to be trusted when left to my own devices."
"Yeah, you might volunteer to be Santa Clause." Victor said. "Scary."
"Don't sass at me, Victor." She muttered.
Marie got up and stretched before she sat down next to me on the couch. "Are yah taking French next semester too?"
"Yup, I just need a few more elective credits, and I'm seven-eighths French." Jackie said. "I attended ballet school here in New York, but I spent most of my time in Canada or France."
"But yah don't speak French?" Marie asked.
I tried to yank a little less forcefully so I didn't accidentally elbow her in the face, and she held down my hands with one of her own. She cuddled up next to my side and took an end to help me untangle.
"I'm just not fluent, and mainly out of willful ignorance to spite my parents." She sighed and set aside another present. "Which doesn't seem quite so noble anymore."
"How do yah speak French?" Marie asked Victor.
"Jimmy and I grew up in a French settlement." He said.
"Oh...because Canada...duh." Marie poked my side. "So do yah speak French, sugah?"
"Poorly." Victor answered for me. "He was better doing things with his hands and math than languages and reading."
"If I'm so good with my hands, why the fuck can't I get this motherfucking box of fuckery to fucking untangle?!" I demanded.
Marie laughed beside me, and Jackie and Victor both snickered. He held up his untangled string of beads with a shit-eating grin and got up to start stringing them around the tree. Marie tugged on a strand of lights, and it all magically smoothed out into a straight line. It was fucking witchcraft. She grinned and pushed me lightly as I got off the couch and went over to help Victor.
"When are we gonna do the gift thing?" I asked him.
"We'll have a family Christmas in my room the same time as the Winter Ball."
"We don't have to chaperone that or some shit do we?"
"Like they'd trust us. One Eye's handling it."
So it was going to be even more boring and stupid than it sounded. Thank god Marie hadn't wanted to go, and now we'd all have a good excuse to avoid the whole clusterfuck of teenage hormones. I finished winding the lights around the tree and plugged them in. A few didn't light up, but I didn't give a fuck at that point. We both stepped back and looked at it. Some ornaments or something should probably go on too, but I didn't know shit about how to decorate.
"Good enough." Victor summed up my thoughts.
I kicked aside the empty boxes. "Did the holy fucking council order us to attend the group Christmas?"
"You would know these things if you actually attended the meetings."
"For a cat, you're really bitchy." I growled back.
"For a man, you're really short." He retorted.
"Ohhhhhh!" Jackie called.
I stabbed my finger in her direction. "Shut it, man hands."
She glared at me. "I do not have man hands!"
"Yah helped me crack walnuts just by squeezing them." Marie whispered.
Jackie gave me another dark look. "I'm gonna crack somebody's nuts."
"Don't yah dare!" Marie gasped. "Those are mine!"
"Ew." Jackie made a face. "Why would you even want those? No offense boys, but testicles don't exactly inspire poetry. They're pretty gross actually."
"Then why do you suck dick so much?" I asked her.
Victor gave me a low warning growl, but she just sneered at me.
"Because if I went to a shelter, they would have sent me back to my parents. And since I like to eat once a day or so, I sucked some dick and got five hundred dollars and a truck." She said.
"You got that for a blowjob?" I scoffed.
"What? No." She gave a laugh. "While he lazed around in post-orgasm bliss, I slammed his head against the dash a few times, rifled through his pockets, and dumped him by the side of the road."
"Yah only knocked him out, rah-ght?" Marie asked.
"Eh. Pretty sure. But for all I know, he froze to death." Jackie replied. "Hey, if he had been a good person, he would have dropped me off where he said he would. Instead, he locked the car doors. He shouldn't have tried to play that game with me."
"Are you all getting into the Christmas spirit?" Dr. Skank asked, popping her head in the room.
"Just finishing things up." Jackie said sweetly.
Dr. Skank—why the hell didn't I think of that name first?!—walked into the room, surveying all we'd done like she was the queen of fucking England visiting the colonies. I barely held back a growl.
"Are you going to be at the Christmas party?" She asked, walking right into my personal space. "We'd all really appreciate it if you'd come."
"We'll make an appearance." Victor answered for me again. "Did you need something?"
"Not really." She turned back to me, dismissing him entirely. "It was so nice of you to set it up."
"We're happy to help." Marie cut in with a fake smile. "We know how busy you and Scott are, so everyone is trying to pitch in. I think Ms. Frost even volunteered to help him put up the mistletoe."
"Oh did she?" Dr. Skank murmured, her scent flooding with jealousy. "Excuse me."
She stalked out of the room, and Jackie gave Marie an impressed look. "There might be hope for you yet!"
Chuck's Christmas party sounded like every bit of the teenage filled nightmare I thought it would be. I double checked my hands to make sure there wasn't any grease on them, then steeled myself and opened the door to the living room. The noise level was almost as bad as the jet taking off, but I'd gotten used to filtering through the sound of a large crowd. I kept an ear out for Marie or one of her teenage friends, and I got an earful of that Jubilee kid as my reward.
"—jerk! Oh, ohhh! Here comes Mr. Sex Growl!"
Ugh, she'd better not be talking about me. Dealing with Dr. Skank 1 and Dr. Skank 2—who was wearing all white again and staring a hole in my back as I made my way across the room—was bad enough. I sure as hell didn't need any of Marie's friends getting crushes on me too.
"Please don't call him that. Yah know he can probably hear yah."
I relaxed a little when I finally caught the sound of Marie's voice. I might be able to suffer through this damn thing if I had her by my side. The mall rat snorted and denied that I could hear them. Nice to know what people around this place thought of my abilities. Marie saw me and quickly looked away with a blush and a smile. As cute as that was, I really hated not being able to claim her in public. I was her mate, and I wanted to act like it. The Wolverine growled in agreement as we scoped out the two boys sitting on the couch with Marie. Their only saving grace was that the mall rat sat between them and my Marie. I walked up behind the couch and forced myself to keep my touch with Marie friendly, with a hair ruffle suitable for an adult to give a kid.
"Hey, kid. You doing alright?"
She tilted her head back and smiled at me. "Yeah. Thanks for coming."
"Sure thing." I muttered, glancing around. "Isn't Jackie supposed to be with you?"
It wasn't that I didn't trust Marie in a large crowd, I just didn't trust a crowd of teenagers around Marie. They could be vicious little shits, even the older ones from the conversation I overheard between the pretty boy and the swamp rat. Jackie had actually defended Marie though, and she might need an ally again here at the party.
"Ah told her she could sit with her friends over there." Marie answered, looking over at another couch.
Jackie lay on the couch, taking up the entire thing, with four guys grouped around her.
"Well she certainly made herself comfortable." The little ice prick sneered.
The girl who liked him immediately nodded. "Yeah, I wonder how many of them she's slept with."
"None!" Marie protested. "She jus'...likes attention."
"She'll get some when Sabretooth comes in." Lighter boy added.
Dr. Skank 1 stepped to the middle of the room and did that annoying as fuck hand clapping thing. Everyone immediately went quiet, and I swear she used her powers to do it.
"Who wants to sing the first Christmas carol?"
A/N: Lots of family time in this one! The actual "Christmas chapter" where they all exchange gifts with each other, will obviously have a lot of family time between the four of them too. So my question is, do you want that first and then the Wolverine/smut chapter afterward or Wolverine/smut first and then gift giving?
What do you think of how they're all interacting right now? And I finally got to include some more about Logan's childhood, YAY! But it's depressing...so...ANGST!
Anyway, I'm super fucking busy this week, so I won't leave a long AN. Just please review and let me know what you think and what you want to see next!
PS: I'm not usually including line breaks between Logan and Wolverine to show how they're starting to share control more and more...
