Fang: This is based on a true story.
Me; Not exactly...
Fang: Saint is a Farmville addict.
Me: Hey, I've caught you on there!
Fang: Not as much as you!
Me: Well, anyway, I'm sure this chapter will be relatable to many, rather you yourself are recovering or in the throes of an addiction, or if you know someone who's been there.
Fang: Farmville ruins lives.
Me: Oh, shut up.
Max's POV
It was late in the afternoon, only a couple hours until dinner time and I officially had nothing better to do.
I had taken care of the rest of the Flock, making sure Fang finally got the peace and quiet he deserved. Sure, it meant practically shoving Gazzy outside and bribing Iggy, but hey, it got the job done.
Problem was, it left me totally bored.
So, without anything better to do, I borrowed Ella's computer. Ella had just gone out with a couple of her friends about fifteen minutes ago, taking away my last chance at human interaction. She had left her laptop in sleep mode, so I just tapped on the keyboard to get it back on.
Jeez, Ella had a thing for opening up new windows. She had about twelve opened on all kinds of different things. I finally picked one at random and opened it.
Ella's Facebook account. Ella kept on insisting I should get an account on here, but she hadn't convinced me yet. I didn't see the point. I didn't have anyone to really keep in touch with. I could just call her and Mom if I needed to talk. Besides, I didn't like the idea of anything about my life being spread across the internet. I'd become famous enough.
I surfedaround the site anyway, using Ella's account. I noticed a whole bunch of her friends had 'poked' her with the poke feature, so I poked them all back for her. I searched a couple famous people and wrote on the CSM's Facebook page wall.
Then, I started scanning through Ella's applications.
She was mainly playing a game called Mafia Wars, which just seemed like a support to the growing crime statistics to me. She had another one called 'The Truth Game', too, where you answered stupid, meaningless questions about people for fun.
Then, I saw Farmville.
Ella didn't seem to use her Farmville game much. All it had were a couple plowed pieces of land, a chicken, and two cows. Lame.
I went back to her Wall and saw that she had about a gazillion Farmville gift requests and stuff. She had all these 'Special Deliveries' and things that she had failed to accept.
Out of curiosity, I accepted them all.
I went on Ella's Farmville and started opening them. I got some more animals, a couple trees, but mostly a lot of building parts. With all those parts, I figured she ought to have something built, but when I found out that you had to be a certain level to build something, and Ella wasn't there yet.
So, I started planting stuff in her plots. I harvested all of her animals that were ready, too. I was gonna need money to buy the building frame, after all, as well as a higher level.
Seeing that the few plots I had weren't going to be enough, I plowed some more spots and planted in them, too.
Ella had a bunch of Farmville friend requests, too. I accepted them all. Then, I found out I could get more money and experience helping out on their farms. I was all over that.
Helping on their farms got me mystery eggs, which gave me more chickens and building materials.
I surfed Ella's Facebook wall and found out that people were giving out more free stuff there, which I took advantage of.
I started sending other people free stuff, in hopes of getting things back.
Bit by bit, I started to level up.
Ella came home somewhere around Level 22. I think. I really wasn't paying attention, to be honest.
"Max... What are you doing?" Ella asked, walking into our room.
"I just adopted a Pink Cow!" I told her, not looking up from the screen. "I also just got the Animal Shelter Red Ribbon and leveled up. I think I'll buy a garage now, what do you think?"
"Are you playing Farmville?" Ella asked me, looking over my shoulder.
"Damn straight." I told her. "I have never seen a more epic farm, have you?" I said, zooming my farm out so she could see what I'd done to it.
Ella stared at my farm for a couple seconds, tilting her head to the side. "Max, how long have you been on the computer?"
I shrugged, going back to my farm. After all, my strawberries had just ripened and I needed to harvest them before they wilted. "No idea, since you left."
"What?" She asked. "Max, I've been gone for hours! You don't mean to say you've been on this computer the entire time, do you?"
I shrugged again. "I had nothing better to do..."
"Oh. My. God." She exclaimed. "Max, back away from that computer."
"Why?" I asked, alarmed. I pulled the laptop closer. "I'm not hurting anyone!"
"I think you're becoming a Farmville addict." She said, taking a step towards me. "You need to get off, it'll ruin your mind."
"Will not!" I shot back. "Actually, it's given me some great ideas! I bet I could run my own farm someday! I'll have an organic farm! It'll be great! You can help! I'll put you in charge of the arborists!"
She stared at me for a moment. "Max, give me that computer."
"No!" I yelled, getting up with the laptop.
"Just hand it over, Max." Ella said in a calming voice. "Just slowly give the computer to me and sit down..."
"Never!" I said, racing out of the room with the laptop.
I could hear Ella in hot pursuit close behind. "Mom! MOM!"
"Tattle-tale!" I yelled back at her.
Mom stepped out into the hall at that point, blocking both our paths.
"What in the world is going on here?" She asked, hands on hips, looking from one of us to the other.
"She started it!" I said, pointing to Ella.
"Max is a Farmville addict." Ella stated. "I'm trying to help her."
Mom stared at both of us for a moment, eyebrows raised.
"One's got a NyQuil addiction, the other can't tear herself off Facebook." She finally said, rolling her eyes. She looked upwards, as if looking for an answer from God himself. "I think I know why some species eat their young." She muttered.
Needless to say, Mom banned me from the computer for a couple days. I tried to fight it on grounds of complete unfairness. I mean, my crops might wither before then!
For some reason, she was completely unfazed.
"I can't believe this!" I said, throwing up my arms. I was in Fang's room now, telling him about my problems. "I wasn't hurting anything! And what about my wheat crops? No one likes withered wheat!"
"MmmHmm."
Oh, how helpful. "Is that all you can say?" I shot at him.
He looked up at me, pointing to his mouth, that was still pretty swollen. "MmmHmm."
I rolledv my eyes, sitting down on the bed next to him. I sighed. "Fang? Am I really a Farmville addict?"
He looked up at me again, his eyes unreadable, as usual. At first, I thought he wasn't going to respond at all. Then, I only wished he hadn't.
"MmmHmm."
Fang: Freaking unrealistic game...Pink cows and super-fast growing wheat...
Me: Candy corn ponies and chickens that lay wooden boards, too!
Fang: Yeah...
Me: That reminds me, I need to check my Farmville! Should be time to harvest the chickens! -runs off-
Fang: ...Addict. Guess I'll take care of this...
R&Rville?
