I'm sorry I didn't update the last two days, I was kinda out of town for the weekend to hang out with some old roommates of mine. So here's what you can consider a triple chapter. It's approximately triple the length of one of my normal chapters. Not sure if I like how this chapter turned out, I'm not the best at one sided dialogue, or apparently grieving scenes. So let me know what you think of it. If it seems off to you guys as well then I'll probably go back an change it.
Also, have to give credit where credit is due, Hoshi no Negai gave me some good ideas for the content of this scene, so Thanks again for the help!
Anyways, Hope you enjoy,
Trouble 1
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"Miss me?"
"I would have come by sooner but Raven wouldn't let me leave. Said I was too injured or something. Of course, I did get stabbed so I guess she had a point, much to the doctor's dismay." I chuckled at the thought. "He didn't like me very much, even as a child. I guess I caused too much trouble or something."
I looked away for a moment, taking a deep breath before turning back.
"Pretty nice place you got here. Beautiful view. Not that far from Patch. I'm sure your girls would have no problem visiting any time they want. Tai too, I guess." I paused for a moment as I frowned. "I don't know if you two were romantic by now or what, but I'm sure he's going to miss you something fierce.
"Truthfully, knowing the truth, I can't even blame you if you and Tai had that type of relationship. I was gone, pouting like a child, while you were trying to make do without me. With both Raven and I disappearing like we did, it only made sense that you two would turn to each other for comfort."
I ran a hand through my hair nervously, looking away once again.
"Turns out I'm exactly like my sister after all. Whether I want to be or not," I said quietly, my hand dropping back to my side. "Maybe Branwen's are destined to hurt those they love, if that's the case I did one hell of a job living up to the family name."
I swallowed, my mouth running dry as Summer's last moments came to mind. In a single moment, all those barriers I had up to keep me functional came crashing down. There was nothing left to stop the pain from rearing its ugly head. I felt tears well in my eyes as I fought to keep them from falling.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, the words barely making it past my lips. "I'm sorry for everything. I messed up worse than I ever thought I could. I should have never left you with only a note. I should have never left before you had a chance to explain. I should have never left you alone on that mission.
"I should have never left."
I felt water drip onto my cheeks as I lost the fight with my tears.
"It's all my fault," I said, my voice catching in my throat. "You're gone because of me.
"I know what you would say, that I wasn't holding the sword so I'm not the one to blame. But I was there, and just being present makes me partially at fault for this. You probably would have had a better chance if I had stayed away."
My heart clenched as my knees gave out, dropping me to the ground in front of the grave. A moment later I fell forward, my forehead buried in the grass my good arm supported my weight. I opened my mouth to say more but all that came out was a pitiful sob. There was no doubt left anymore, I was crying. Every emotion I had hidden away over the past month was out in the open, each demanding a tear of their very own, and I could no longer deny them.
The tears flowed steadily now, some flowing down my nose while others dripped off my eyelashes. Either way they all made their way to the ground only to be promptly sucked up by the young grass.
It was several long minutes before I was able to calm down enough to speak again.
"I'm a coward," I said hoarsely from my spot in the grass. "I sho-I should have told you this when you were alive. Instead I bring it up now, when you can't talk back. You should be here; yelling at me, screaming, cuffing me upside the head for my stupidity. But you're not. You're dead, and no number of tears is going to fix it."
I sat up slowly, wiping my face with my sleeve.
"I, should go," I murmured as my sleeve came back covered in dirt and tears. "I said what I came here for, and then some. And I have places to be, other people expecting me. But I needed to come here first.
"I-I love you Summer, and I don't think I can ever stop. You were my best friend, my closest partner, and the love of my life. I know for a fact I'm never going to be able to get over that."
My legs were shaky as I climbed back to my feet. I already felt exhausted, emotionally and physically, and it wasn't even noon yet.
"I'll do my best for Ruby but I don't know how much that will be. She has Tai after all, and after this I doubt he'll want me anywhere near them. As much as I want to run over there right now, I know I won't be welcome."
I took a slow breath lowering my eyes to the gravestone once again.
"Goodbye Summer," I finished, finally turning away.
With legs of jelly and an aching heart I left cliff behind me knowing neither would recover any time soon. The only thing that would cure my heart completely would be Summer coming back. But since that was never going to happen I would have to settle with something that would cure it temporarily, luckily I knew just the thing.
