Chapter Forty-Four: It's My Life

"So, Fiyero, when do you think you'll get married?"

The question made Elphaba struggle not to choke on her food. Looking at Fiyero out of the corner of her vision, she could tell he was equally shocked by her father's inquiry. He swallowed his food. "What was that?"

"I just meant that you expect to take the throne soon, don't you? What else do you intend to do after you graduate?" The look in Frex's eyes told her that he'd brought this up on purpose, and the way he glanced at her as he said it made it clear he was proving a point.

"I might want to travel Oz a bit first. As you mentioned, I do have to get married and I haven't really met a suitable wife yet." Fiyero's voice was strained.

"No, you most certainly haven't." Frex gave Elphaba a look.

Ateri cleared her throat. "Well, Frexspar, dear, let's drop the subject, shall we? I mean, he's probably stressed enough about graduating in a few months. We don't need to worry him about everything afterwards, too! Let him focus on his schooling for the time being."

"Fair enough," Frex acquiesced. But then he turned on Elphaba. "Fabala, what about you? You don't have to marry to hold the position of Eminent Thropp. Of course, your great grandfather is still going strong, so you'll have some time. You can't plan to just hang around here the whole time, can you?"

Nanny was watching the conversation with either horror or amusement. Nessa somehow couldn't tell that this discussion had much deeper implication. Elphaba reached for the pepper. "I believe maybe I'll go to the City. I did have that meeting with the Wizard, remember? There may be opportunities there." She shrugged.

"Opportunities that would get in the way of being Eminent Thropp?"

"I don't know. And I frankly don't care." Elphaba wasn't going to let Frex scare her anymore. "Nessa can do it, if I step down."

"Oh, Fabala, I couldn't." Nessa shook her head vigorously. "I'm not cut out for that."

"Well, neither am I. Maybe Shell, then?"

Her father slammed his fists on the table. "Enough! You have shamed this family enough. You will be Eminent Thropp, as is your duty."

Meeting her father's eyes, Elphaba simply replied, "We'll see."

Down the table, Fiyero was smiling.

Her father left the subject alone for the moment, but he burst into her room after dinner. "What was that?"

"What was what?" She asked innocently.

"You know what I'm talking about! That talk about giving up the position of Eminent Thropp. That is the only thing this family has left!"

"Really? You married a Vinkun queen, Father."

"And she's only regent until that idiot son of hers marries and takes over."

She pursed her lips. "He's not an idiot. And neither is she. I don't know how you've managed to pull the wool over her eyes for so long, but one of these days she's going to wizen up, and I only hope I'm there!"

Frex clenched his fists and set his jaw. "You have always been an impossible child."

"And you've always been an ass." She said simply.

"How dare you?" He strode across the room, fist raised.

But she had expected it. He had never hit her before, but he'd come close. She'd always backed down before, though, and she wouldn't. Not now. So she whispered a few words, waved her arms and he walked into an invisible barrier, shocked. He'd never known she was taking sorcery classes. He would've disapproved. "What was that, Father?"

"You bitch!" Her father stalked around the room, testing his limits. But he couldn't get to her. They were at an impasse.

"I suppose I am." She finally stood up from her bed and folded her arms across her chest. "Now, I don't know what I plan to do when I graduate. Maybe I'll go out and see the world. Maybe I'll go work for the Wizard. The man may be a tyrant, but it'd be better than living with you!"

"This is not the end of this conversation."

"Oh, it is, Father. The last semester at Shiz has been paid for. There's not a damn thing you can do to me. Throw me out if you want, but I will not beg for your forgiveness."

He glared at her from the doorway. "When you've calmed down, we'll revisit this."

"So you think."

But they didn't discuss it again. Her father wouldn't speak another word to her. She wasn't certain exactly what his plan was, now, but she didn't particularly care. At one point, she thought Nanny might say something, but she didn't. It was Nessa.

On the ride back, with the four of them stuck in the carriage, Nessa called her out. "Why were you so cruel to Father?"

"He's been cruel to me my entire life, Nessa. I want to live life on my terms. He's never let me do that." She could feel Fiyero's eyes on her as she spoke. She didn't look at him, though, worried that a look might say too much.

"That's a bit of an exaggeration, isn't it? He just wants you to live a life guided by the Unnamed God."

"No, Nessa, he doesn't. And even if that were all, that's my decision to make, not his."

"I can't stand it when you fight with him."

That reminded her, for a moment, why she had always backed down. Before they moved to Kiamo Ko, she'd shared a room with Nessa. Her sister had been there for every lecture her father had given, every snarky response. It always resulted in Elphaba backing down because of Nessa's tears. While she loved her sister, she knew she couldn't just live her life to protect her. "I'm sorry about that, Nessie, but it's time I took control of my life."

Nessa looked out the window, sighing heavily. "He's not controlling you, Fabala."

Fiyero intervened at that point. "Nessarose, please pardon me, but I really don't think arguing with your sister will get you anywhere. You know how stubborn she can be."

Elphaba raised her eyebrows at Fiyero but bit her tongue, reminding herself that Nanny was there. She didn't speak to Fiyero again until they were alone the next week.

"I heard your shouting match from down the hall. I wanted so badly to make sure you were okay. He sounded really angry, Fae." Fiyero cradled her cheek in his palm. "You seemed fine at breakfast the next morning, though."

"I've never talked back to him like that before. I think he was more shocked than anything else." She wasn't going to tell him that Frex had tried to hit her. If he heard that, she feared he'd act drastically.

"What did he say? I could only hear muffled shouts."

"He just told me I was impossible. I think you've said as much before." She teased.

"Oh, I have." He laughed. "But I like it."

"I doubt he felt that way. I told him that my future was up to me and he couldn't do anything to me anymore. I know it's terrible, but I'd been waiting for the last payment for Shiz to go through before I spoke up."

"It's not terrible. You were protecting yourself from retribution. I respect that."

"I'm too close to graduating to screw that up."

"You should've just told him about us and seen how that went."

"Fiyero, that would've brought more eyes on us. I'd never be able to sneak out. And I'd be kicked out of Kiamo Ko. I worried he might do that anyway, but I also know he's more talk than he is action."

"He'd really throw you out?"

"If he knew about certain, uh, aspects of our relationship, I think he would."

Fiyero bit his lip. "I'll never understand what my mother sees in him."

"Me, either. You're mother is a decent woman. She deserves better."

"I just hope one day that she can see that."