Chapter 50
If Jane had any concerns about Maura's mood swings and almost constant need for sex she didn't have to worry before it all changed. Jane heard her phone ring and reached out for it, her arm brushing against Maura. Maura's hand grabbed Jane's elbow and pushed back.
"Stay on your own side of the bed," she grumbled. Jane watched Maura's now cranky face as she answered the phone.
"Rizzoli."
"Hey Jane you coming back to the office this afternoon? We got a body," Frost said.
"Yeah Frost, text me the address and I'll meet you there."
"Great. Dr. Pike has responded so he'll be there."
Jane sighed. "Okay, thanks."
Maura threw the blanket back and started to get up.
"No, Pike will be there. You're on limited duty, remember?"
"I don't need you to remind me, Jane. He's a subpar examiner, I wish I could let him go."
"We need him right now, Maura. You're resting this afternoon. I'll let you know later how everything turns out."
"Rest Jane? After all your clawing at me when we got home?"
Jane stopped in amazement. "Really, M? If I recall correctly you slammed me up against the wall and started to take me by the door. I brought you home to rest not start a lovemaking marathon."
"Please, Jane, quit equating your skills to lovemaking." Maura rolled away from Jane and closed her eyes. Jane stood and stared at her back until she realized she was running late. As she took a quick shower Jane did her best to hold her tongue, remembering what the pregnancy books said about Maura's now raging hormones. She leaned down to kiss Maura goodbye. Maura rolled over instead, muttering something Jane couldn't understand. Jane straightened up and, slipping into her Detective Rizzoli persona, walked out the door. She called Angela briefly to ask her to pick the children up from school. Angela volunteered to make dinner and stay until Jane came home.
The body turned out to be a suicide and Dr. Pike took the body back to the morgue. Jane opted to return to the precinct for awhile.
"Problems at home, Jane?" Frost asked.
"Not really, more of Maura's mood swings." Frost shook his head.
"I give you a lot of credit Jane. I don't know if I can handle that."
"You won't have much of a chance, Frost, when you start having children."
Frost threw his hands up in the air. "Let me find the right girl first, Jane. I want to have a couple of years together before we start a family."
Jane buried herself in paperwork for a couple of hours. She put the last completed file in her outbox when her phone rang. A text from Maura: "coming home soon love? Can't wait to see u." Jane sighed. She hoped to find a sweet Maura at home and not Freddy Krueger's sister.
Maura stirred the sauce while Angela made the pasta. "I wish I could cook like you, Angela."
"You're an excellent cook, Maura, you need to learn a few of my techniques, that's all," Angela smiled at her daughter-in-law.
"I don't think Jane likes my cooking," Maura said.
"Knowing Jane I'm sure she loves your cooking, Maura. Jane has never been very complimentary. Her way of letting you know she enjoys your cooking is to eat every bite on her plate and ask for more, even when she's about to burst."
"I never knew that. I always thought Jane ate like that because of the number of calories she burns at her job."
"No, my Janie can be a picky eater. She can be starving but if a dish isn't to her liking she'll leave it alone."
"I hope she's home soon, Angela. Jane works too hard."
"She's a Rizzoli. All of us work hard but she knows she has you to come home to." At Angela's words Maura burst into tears. Angela chuckled and gathered Maura into her arms.
"What's wrong sweetie?"
"I hate being pregnant! I feel so huge and ugly. I'm mean to Jane. Sometimes I want to ravage her the minute she walks in the door, the next I'm pushing her away because I don't want her to touch me."
Angela laughed. "Hormones, honey, trust me. I went through that with all three of my children. Frank said I was about to drive him to the insane asylum. One time when he told me that I snapped back at him to give me the keys and go get in the car."
Maura laughed. "Did you really?"
Angela nodded. "I felt huge, ugly, I couldn't see my ankles and felt like I needed to be off my feet every few minutes. My ankles swelled. Frank had to help me in and out of the bathtub because I was big but I didn't want to take showers."
"I read all the time, Angela, and I know what the books say to expect but when it happens to you it seems different from what I've read. For instance did you experience postpartum depression after your pregnancies Angela?"
"Not exactly. Or, if I did, it was minor. I didn't have bad feelings toward the baby but I could kill Frank any number of ways."
"Any particular reason you can recall?"
"I was jealous. Here I'd given birth to a child and my body was in horrible shape. Frank gets up in the morning, showers, dresses and leaves for work. In those days, because of being a plumber he was always in great shape. Then I'd get out of bed, shower, examine my body before dressing and wanted to vomit. I sagged where I used to be firm. I swear I told Jane one time that if my boobs sagged to my waistline in my twilight years I was blaming her."
"Why Jane?"
"She was the worst to wean off the breast. I knew she'd be a terrific ballplayer someday because she threw the bottle out of the crib."
"She did?" Maura laughed.
Angela nodded. "Oh yes. Her crib was right behind the dinner table. One night Frank got so upset with her crying because I used to breastfeed her while we ate dinner. He grabbed a biscuit and threw it over his shoulder at her, telling her to shut up awhile."
"What happened?" Maura was openly laughing now, picturing Frank throwing a biscuit into Jane's crib.
"She was quiet for a moment. I think she was surprised probably more so at Frank's tone of voice than anything else."
"Did it last?"
"No, she just started crying louder. I got her a bottle and she threw it out of the crib, once again. Only this time it bounced off the wall. The bottle broke, of course, since it was glass. It took so long for Jane to understand she had to have her bottle."
Maura stood there, thinking. "I love becoming a mother, of course, but sometimes I feel like I hate Jane. She has a beautiful body and mine is getting stretched every which way. And of course, I hate the interruption to my schedule. I came home to rest this afternoon and a substitute examiner was called in on the latest case. I hated watching Jane roll out of bed and respond like before, but without me."
"It's only temporary, Maura."
Maura nodded. "That's what the books all say, Angela, but I'm worried. Will Jane love me anyway, even if I look like I'm sagging to the ground and she's still taut and beautiful?" Maura's tears began again. Angela gathered Maura in her arms.
"She'll love you till the day she dies and then some, Maura."
Just then the front door opened and Jane came in. "Hey, how is everyone?" she smiled when she saw Maura and Angela's embrace.
Maura broke away from Angela and turned to Jane. "I hate you, Jane Rizzoli!" she screamed and ran for the bedroom.
Angelo and Caitlyn ran out of their rooms, encircling Jane in a hug. Jane reached down to hug her children while giving her mother a puzzled look.
'Hormones' Angela mouthed to Jane.
Jane shook her head and headed into the bedroom. Knocking lightly she entered to find Maura in a fetal position on the bed, sobbing.
Jane knelt down next to her and gathered her in her arms. "I love you, M."
Maura's sobs increased. Jane rubbed her back until she felt Maura calm down.
"I don't like my body, Jane. I'm afraid you're going to leave me someday because I'll look so bad. Some new examiner will come into the precinct and steal you away from me," Maura sobbed.
Jane wanted to laugh at the incredulousness of Maura's words but they broke her heart. She knew Maura thought this was a distinct possibility.
"M, look at me. I told you I love you. That's not just for now, it's forever. There will never be anyone else for me, Maura. I don't even notice any other women. Why should I? I have the most beautiful woman in the world right here in my arms."
"I know you love me, Jane. Why don't you love our babies?" Maura's crying began anew. Jane rolled her eyes at the ceiling, grateful Maura couldn't see her.
Three more months, Jane thought. Will we survive?
TBC
