Authors Note:
Happy new year! Well a little bit too late for that... Haha! I know, I know I've been absent for like three months and I do apologize. It's just that I moved and then there was school and my constant need to read The Vampire Diaries Fanfiction since we all very much know The Secret Life of the American Teenager has been A-wall and finally it's coming back in March and I can't wait.
Well this story has changed a lot in time since I first started writing and I feel extremely proud, but I feel like I need to work on my stories and ameliorate. Enough of my obsessive need to explain things to you when you just want to read. You probably aren't reading this anyways. Whatever... I love you guys:)
Here's my new chapter since a long time and I hope you find it supercalifragilisticexpialid ocious!
I do not own Secret Life of the American Teenager. Only the characters Lucas and Valerie Kate Underwood!
Amy's POV
I woke up to the dull throb in my head and tenderness in my eyes. Dazed, I look around and adjust my eyes to the harsh morning light. I look to the left of me and see Ricky staring at me. I would have commented on how creepy it was to stare, but the thought was erased from my mind. There were little crease lines between his eyebrows showing how worried he was, but why.
Then it all hit me, the worries that seemed like a dream were a reality. I was momentarily kidnapped by Ricky's father, no scratch that... Bob, his name was Robert and nothing more. Then I remember running and running until Ricky and Lucas came to my aid.
Oh God, Lucas... he was gone. No, he wasn't geographically gone; he was gone like Lucas had never existed on this cruel world and all because he saved Ricky's life. Now that I think of it, it was my fault that he died. He only jumped infront of the speeding bullet because Ricky was doing the same for me... because I always needed to be saved.
Not only do I feel the overwhelming grief stricken guilt for taking away somebody's life, but the unimaginable guilt of missing out on my own daughters one month of being brought into this world. What does that say about me?
Apparently I lost the sense of time and all things surrounding me because I hadn't realized the whimpers that sounded from my mouth and the waterworks that never failed to slow down or stop, not until Ricky had taken me in his strong arms.
I felt him kiss the crown of my head and I buried my head deeper into his neck and let his embrace wrap around me like a cocoon. It felt like nothing was salvageable at this point. All the things that we hoped didn't go wrong went horribly wrong. Maybe I deserved this?
Clearly I'm out of it today because I hadn't recognized the voice that repeated its all my fault over and over again like a mantra and that broken and blubbering voice was my own.
"Hey, I know what you're thinking and it's absolutely not your fault, so stop blaming yourself." Ricky snaps angrily and moves away from me, but I knew he wasn't mad at me.
He was upset by what I thought, but I wanted him to be angry and blame it on me because it was my fault even if I wasn't the one with the gun or the one exactly behind Lucas or the one who kidnapped me from the very beginning.
"It is my fault, Ricky! Don't you see? If I hadn't been so hellbent on going to the bakery on my own then you would have been there or the fact that I had to open my big mouth and encourage him to freaking pull the trigger! I killed him and endangered all of us and to top it all I'm a horrible mother who couldn't celebrate with their own daughter!" I argue back and by the time I'm done with my rant I felt like I was hyperventilating.
"Oh, Stop with the pity party! You did nothing wrong and this is all to blame on my damned father, not you! So just freaking stop because this hurts me just as much it hurts you, Amy!" He yelled with conviction. I stared up at him wide-eyed and felt all the air had been knocked out of me.
My breaths were ragged and shallow and it practically hurt when I tried to take in a deep breath.
Ricky saw the discomfort and heard my breathing, more like my lack of breathing and hurried by my side again. "Hey, Hey, I'm sorry! Just breath! God, I love you, so just breath!" He says in a hurry.
He pulls me into a hug that always seemed to send a bolt of electricity through my spine and I feel better as if I were breathing the purest of air and my lungs immediately take in all the air I can get and let it out.
I feel him relax and I keep my hold on him tight and relentless. "I love you too. So much." I hiccup and blubber. He answered with a hum of approval and my heart swells.
If yesterday hadn't happen and this was a regular day I would have kissed him, but I still felt all the things that happened to me crash into me like a tidal wave.
"It hurts, Ricky." I whisper.
"It won't forever." He whispers against my hair and it's my turn to nod and hum.
After sitting in bed and just enjoying the silence because it was the only thing needed. We needed to think what we were going to do... We needed to grasp the idea of what we went through not even twenty four hours ago. Where's Bob? How do we announce that Lucas was dead? Did he even have any relatives?
What were we going to do about Valerie and her one month celebration? What about John? All these questions were unanswered that I desperately needed answers for. We needed a solution and fast.
Ricky's POV
Since I had been awake this morning before Amy, I just looked at how serene her face appeared, but that was only in the state of unconscious because I most definitely knew that when she woke up her face would tell a whole other story.
That's what pained me the most... The thought of not being able to help her, but she would survive this because somehow she always did.
She survived a teen pregnancy and the hardships of being pregnant in high school. Se had seen me in my worst and she had overcome the jealous ex's.
This was only another bump in the road or better said a pothole. I saw her eyes flutter signaling her arrival from her dream state. I saw her look at me and I gauged her expression while she gauged mine.
It was literally a pang to my hearts when she thought it was her fault and I needed her to stay clear of a guilty conscience when she didn't need one because she did nothing wrong.
I told her this and I told her I loved her because I do and always will. All we had to do was wait for Bob to get arrested and spend time with Valerie and John because every moment counted and I especially realized that yesterday... I mean come on I was in the brink of death all I could think about was family, and it all seemed ironic to me.
I was pensive about family, yet my life was being threatened by somebody who's supposed to be family, but Bob was never a father and never will be.
That I am sure of.
Anne's POV
Where on earth could Ricky and Amy possibly be? I had decided to take Valerie and John home with me, since there was no sigh of Ricky and Amy coming home any time soon yesterday.
I was starting to get worried and jittery. I had Valerie and John fed breakfast and had them entertained, but a TV show about a sponge and a starfish isn't much of a distraction when you haven't seen your mom or dad in hours.
John was growing impatient and asking about Amy and Ricky every chance he had. And the only other answer I had was that they were coming. I never specified if they were coming soon, but I think he understood.
Now all I need to do is get to the bottom of what was happening. I had a sickening feeling and I was seriously overwrought.
A/N:
Well that was that chapter. I don't know when will be the next time I upload a chapter, but hopefully it will be soon. Next chapter will be Amy and Ricky seeing John and Valerie and the issue of Clementine is partially confronted. That's all. Read and Review!
