Despite the initial upswing in Killua's level of optimism, the lift in his mood began its journey back down on a gradual decline once the attempt to create an actual plan was in session. He had at first wrongfully assumed that there was only the situation regarding Illumi in which to take into careful consideration. Amidst his struggle to propose a useful tactic to deal with that scenario, it became all too suddenly apparent that there were several other factors he had forgotten.
Working as a team was the original misconception that the boy recognized, as he understood that it was not nearly as simple as the three of them- Gon, Misaki, and himself- combining forces. Misaki had admitted that she could not assure Gon's safety under her watch, and as such Killua could not justify placing his dear friend in potential mortal danger. He swallowed the lump in his throat that insisted he abandon Misaki for that reason, but another part of him was reminded that at least in knowing her location, he could potentially protect the tanned boy.
Of course there was the less rational voice within that seemed to holler much louder than the rest, and yet it came through as unclear and distorted. In an act of either pride or vanity, he made a conscious effort to ignore it in the name of his own sanity.
The "how" was perhaps the greatest question in regard to the possibility of working separately with the two, and truthfully he was mentally exerting himself to ridiculous degrees just to find a feasible answer.
Then there was another issue. The time limit in which he had before Illumi would come for him was indeterminate, but there was also a very serious timer counting down the hours and days to when the mass eruption would occur. This too was not definite, and while Killua supposed that the issue of the pending apocalypse should have obviously been the one that cried out the most to be resolved, somehow the notion that his eldest brother would be seeking him out for reprimand was the one that prominently refused to be ignored.
Thus the former assassin began to comprehend with a painful amount of clarity that there was more than simply one plot to be prepared and an ever-growing list of elements to consider.
For a brief moment he found himself frustrated anew over Haku's death and then wondered momentarily if it was selfish to feel so strongly about it now that the burden of arranging a strategy fell onto his shoulders in the man's permanent absence.
"I could always challenge him again right away. That would give you boys a chance to focus on the larger problem."
Misaki's voice drew his gaze once more in her direction. He scowled at her before redirecting his stare.
"I didn't save you so that you could go get yourself killed again right after, you know."
"Why did you do it then?"
Her voice was slightly coy, and he despised that 'knowing' undertone. Was she playing him even now, after all that had happened?
Killua did not answer the question, and thankfully the girl did not press any further. He spent a few self-pitying seconds to grieve over the situation he had been thrust into, and nearly shuddered at the thought that Illumi could perhaps have endless power over the both of them. If that were true, he was convinced that all was lost.
Yet somehow he still found himself feeling recklessly and foolishly bothered over Misaki's focus to challenge his brother in oddly much the same way he had been bothered by Misaki's interest in 'Yuto'. He understood that his own intrigue in the girl ought to have dissipated entirely the night he had caught them together, yet there was an almost animal part of his mind which insisted that within her desire to fight Illumi was simply the longing to engage him physically…and that in some way, being killed by him was the ultimate act of eroticism.
He would not allow that.
Killua aggressively reclaimed his thoughts, turning them back onto their original path.
"We need more people," he finally murmured.
The girl closed her eyes in lieu of nodding her head.
"I hate to say it, but we might have to contact L.I.G.H.T. to see if they're willing to help us with Haku's original idea. I don't know enough about eruptions to come up with anything better and by the time we research it all it might be too late. The government wants it all covered up, so we have to be careful who we talk to. L.I.G.H.T.'s job is to find a way to stop this. Their leader let us go before, so he might be open to listening to what we have to say."
There was a silence that seemed to be tainted. After a few moments, the girl responded.
"What shall we do about Illumi then?"
Killua shook his head.
"If we could… predict when he would strike…"
"…At me, you mean?"
He glanced over at Misaki once more.
"What do you mean?"
"He won't attack you, is all"
The statement felt oddly insulting, and the boy's fears fueled his annoyance.
"He might kill me," he argued, his irritation serving to hide his terror at the words he spoke so honestly.
To his dismay, her lips upturned and it appeared that she was suppressing a laugh.
"You think that Illumi wants to kill you?"
When he did not reply, Misaki did indeed start to chuckle.
"It's not funny."
Shaking her head lightly, the girl whispered, "I suppose you have a right not to believe a word I say to you, but if there's one thing you should take to heart it's that I speak the absolute truth when I say that I don't think he wants to kill you."
"You sound pretty sure of yourself," he grumbled, disbelieving. He turned his head to the side, a tense frown etched into his features.
"I am. Stop pouting."
The sentiment was enough to nearly anger him. Killua felt that the girl was quite honestly and carelessly trying to make a mockery of one of his deepest fears and insecurities. Unwilling to discuss anything more, he rose to his feet and moved toward the door with his hands in his pockets.
"There might be a way," she called as his the door handle was coiled by his fist.
He hesitated, if only mildly.
"Surely he could kill Gon by himself," she suggested. "There must be a reason he won't."
The silver haired boy's posture improved suddenly as the closest thing he could muster under the circumstances to an encouraging thought struck him. Was it really possible that Illumi, for the first time Killua could think of, had a potential weakness that could he could exploit?
Indeed, he knew that this could change absolutely everything if it was.
A/N: I'm sure I sound like a broken record by now (not to mention dated if I'm using an expression like that -_- ), but thank you to all that are reading and to those reviewing. I really appreciate it!
