Remember when I used to consider 10 days to be a hiatus? Man, do I miss those days...
Still, this is my quickest update in...probably a year. Hope you enjoy!
Just a head's up. This chapter does get pretty weird - but hopefully it generates some laughs. Too bad comedy is subjective...
Euro-Drama Farmyard - Episode 25, Part 1 - A Flash of Dominance
"Last time on Euro-Drama Farmyard!" Adrijana began as she and Lara stood before the camera to do the recap. "The cabins were knocked down, and the final 11 contestants had to put together supplies to build themselves sheds of their very own."
Lara continued, "Highlights included Pavils and Symon sabotaging their own allies, Pavils knocking out Rikard, and Pavils…all in all being an idiot."
"In the end, Symon, Sanna, Petros and Lou won immunity," Adrijana continued. "In a shocking twist, they were the only ones who were able to vote.
"In the end, Petros managed to get Pavils and Hadi eliminated. Pavils was obvious, but Hadi…I can't even remember why he wanted to get rid of him," Lara continued, before scratching her head in confusion.
"Something about wanting to keep the other alliance around so he could keep Lou and Emilia on his side. I don't know – that kid's strategy is confusing as f**k," Adrijana sighed, shaking her head.
"Well, their eliminations mean that only nine are left," Lara announced.
"Carolyn, the sweetheart vlogger from the United Kingdom
Emilia, the intelligent but nuts girl from the Netherlands
Ilene, the shy girl with a strong voice from Belgium
Katerina, the cat lover who loves nothing more than her country, Macedonia
Lou, the absent-minded artist from Cyprus
Petros, the paranoid nerd from Armenia
Rikard, the fabulous Finnish guy
Sanna, the adventurous paraplegic from Denmark
And Symon, the crafty actor from Ukraine
Which one will be crowned the winner? Who will end their journey here? Find out tonight on …"
"Euro…Drama…Farmyard!" Adrijana interrupted.
"You b***h!" Lara screamed as the scene faded to black.
[Intern Toilet: Yay! Screen time!
Amanda (Sweden): Carolyn or Hadi? I guess it would be annoying having an alliance of four in the final 9. But you know what would be more annoying? One of the Frilly Foursome winning!
Bye, bye, Hadi.]
Petros put his arm around Carolyn's back as they walked back with Emilia and Lou.
"I'm so glad you're safe," Emilia told her.
"Thanks. I didn't think I'd be able to survive the bottom 3 four times," Carolyn replied, sighing in relief.
"Oh, it was very close," Petros added, before glaring at Lou. Lou just shook his head and rolled his eyes.
"I'm kind of disappointed I wasn't in the bottom 3," Emilia sighed. "I kind of wanted to pull a Marios."
"A Marios?" Lou repeated.
"You know how Marios was in the bottom 2 three times in a row last season? I kind of wanted to beat his record," Emilia sighed.
"Well, you know, it's pretty hard to outdo Marios," Lou chuckled.
"Then I have achieved the hard!" Emilia cheered. "We're all still in the game. Marios isn't."
"But we didn't make the merge twice," Lou pointed out.
Emilia gave Lou a shove and scoffed, "If you love Marios so much, why don't you marry him?"
"Hey, I'm going to get dinner. Do you want to come with me?" Lou asked Petros.
"I already ate earlier," Petros said.
"Alright," Lou shrugged as he walked off.
"So, where do you want to hang out tonight?" Emilia asked them.
"Actually, we're…uh…going to make out somewhere. In private," Petros blurted out.
"Ooh, I like the sound of that," Carolyn said excitedly.
"Yeah, yeah, let's go," Petros sighed, grabbing Carolyn's arm and pulling her off.
"Aw," Emilia cooed as they disappeared from her sight.
"You can say that again," Rikard snorted as he walked up beside her. He muttered, "A man in charge. You don't see that enough in relationships these days."
"Excuse me!?" Emilia exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips.
"Oh God, did I say that out loud?" Rikard groaned, slapping himself in the face.
"No, please. Enlighten me," Emilia insisted.
"Woah, déjà vu!" Rikard exclaimed, throwing up his wrists.
"Come on, Rikard. You can't be voted off in the first episode," Emilia giggled, before looking at Rikard with a dry expression.
"Well…uh…like…I dunno. Just noticed, you know, in general, the girls here seem to…you know…how you say…wear the pants?"
"What?" Emilia gasped, taking a step back and putting her hands on her mouth.
"What are you two talking about?" Sanna asked as she came over.
"You tell her, Rikard," Emilia said, sounding a little irritated.
"Well, it's just something I've…like…observed," Rikard said, tapping his index fingers together.
"Rikard thinks the girls here are too dominant," Emilia blurted out.
"No way! You actually said that!?" Sanna gasped. "I'm surprised at you, Rikard."
"I meant in relationships and stuff, but…I never said it was necessarily a bad thing," Rikard said defensively.
"What? You think I'm too dominant over Tyge?" Sanna asked.
"I don't know…God…" Rikard groaned. "I mean, from watching you last season. Yeah, I guess you seem to be the one in charge."
"Tyge was the one who kissed me," Sanna said in defense.
"I suppose, but, you know, he went along with all your…um…uh…grudges?"
Sanna's jaw dropped open as he looked at Emilia.
"You know what? You're not the best example," Rikard said, shaking his head.
"Oh, but I am?" Emilia scoffed. "Okay, to be fair, I have admitted that Lou's a bit whipped, but so what?"
"I agree. So what? I never meant to make a big deal over it," Rikard said, looking a little annoyed.
"So, you think this applies to every couple on the show?" Sanna asked, her hands on her hips.
"Not every, but probably the majority," Rikard stated.
"Alright…" Emilia nodded as she thought for a moment. "Who do you think is the leader between Dani and Hadi?"
"Oh, that's kinda tough…" Rikard said, gripping his chin.
"I'd go with Hadi," Sanna said. "He asked out Dani in the first place."
"Maybe, but, Dani would always be in charge of the strategy," Rikard noted.
"What did that have to do with their relationship?" Emilia argued.
"Besides, Hadi went early enough last time," Sanna pointed out. "He could have done more damage if he stayed. Who knows? He might have been good at strategy this season."
"Okay, I don't know that but…you know, Hadi's a gentleman," Rikard stated.
Sanna let out a shrill laugh a second later.
"Rikard, are you having a laugh?" she snorted.
"What's so funny?" Rikard asked in confusion.
"Hadi? A gentleman?" Sanna continued to laugh.
"I still don't get it," Rikard said dryly.
"Do you not remember that confessional from last season?" Emilia asked. "Where he said he was happy he wasn't going to die a virgin?"
"No! He really said that?" Rikard laughed.
"It's not just that," Sanna said. "The dude's really open about his sex life."
"I've never heard him talk about it," Rikard said. "I don't think I've hung out with him that much actually."
"Eh, to be fair, Dani's not much better," Emilia shrugged. "Has she told you about the first time?"
"Ugh, I don't think I want to," Sanna gagged. "But it's probably the same thing I've heard from Hadi."
"Why, what happened?" Rikard asked.
"Dani watched the reruns a few months ago, and she saw the confessional that Hadi made, and she called them and said she'd be happy to do it with him next time they see each other," Emilia told him. "And then she told me the number of times they had sex together."
"Hadi said he lost count," Sanna noted.
"I don't see the big deal," Rikard admitted, scratching the back of his head. "I mean, if people are naturally lustrous. Why not be open about it?"
"Well, a relationship isn't just sex," Sanna answered.
"Sure, but..."
"Wait, doesn't lustrous mean 'shiny'?" Emilia asked.
[Confessional: Well, that escalated quickly
Rikard (Finland): [groans] I really hope Emilia and Sanna don't hold this against me.
Emilia (Netherlands): How did we get to Dani and Hadi's sex life?
[looks paranoid] God, I hope they won't get mad when they watch the reruns
Sanna (Denmark): Rikard is just unbelievable. I'd expect that sexist crap from Pavils, but I expect better from him.]
Petros and Carolyn walked through the woods.
"So, where are we stopping for our sesh?" Carolyn asked, wiggling her eyebrows.
"Oh, I just used that as a cover up. We're not actually making out," Petros admitted as they stopped in their tracks.
"What? Don't tease me like that. You got me all excited," Carolyn pouted.
"There's some things we need to talk about," Petros told her, before sighing, "If you listen carefully we can…make out afterwards."
He gulped halfway through that sentence.
"Oh, okay," Carolyn smiled.
"Okay, first things first," Petros began. "Katerina lied. The alliance is made up."
"How do you know this?" Carolyn asked.
"I went up to Sanna and asked if she'd vote with us," Petros explained. "And I told her about Symon's alliance. But she told me that Symon told her that I'm in an alliance with you, Emilia and Lou. Symon knows the alliance is made up."
Carolyn nodded before saying, "How would Symon know about Emilia and Lou's new alliance?"
"He asked me about it himself," Petros answered. "Came up with this crap about how Pavils told him, and Ilene told him…absolute rubbish, all of it."
"Wait a minute! Symon knows about our old alliance!?" Carolyn gasped. "And now Sanna knows?"
"I denied that the alliance existed – but I'm not sure if Sanna believed me. I don't know how Symon found out – my theory is that Katerina saw my confessionals, or maybe yours, and she told him. But I don't think it's important."
"It is. That means they all know!" Carolyn exclaimed.
"Yes and…that is bad," Petros responded, not sure what to say next.
"Wait – if you knew the alliance was made up, why did you vote off Hadi?" Carolyn asked.
"I'm not even sure if I can remember," Petros sighed, nodding slowly. "Okay, Symon came up to me and asked if I wanted to vote with him. We both agreed on giving some points to Hadi, so I stuck with him."
"Alright, I kind of get it," Carolyn nodded.
"Also, I have an idea," Petros added. "In the next elimination, we should get rid of Sanna along with one of the ones from the other alliance. The way I see it, the longer the alliance around, the longer…um…well, it gives the others someone to focus on, and stops them from trying to vote us off. I'm not sure if you get it."
"Sort of…maybe," Carolyn replied. "But how would we get them to vote off Sanna?"
"I don't know. We could say something about how she's a threat because she was second last year," Petros suggested. "We have time to think about it."
"So, is that all you wanted to talk about?" Carolyn asked, placing a hand on Petros' arm.
"Um…" Petros said nervously. "I believe…so…"
"In that case," Carolyn grinned seductively before grabbing Petros and pulling him to the ground.
They made out for about five seconds, before Petros shouted, "Arrgh!" and slapped her away.
"You okay?" Carolyn asked in concern.
"Ugh…that felt weird," Petros shuddered.
"I'm sorry," Carolyn apologized.
"But you know, I kind of enjoyed it…well, just a bit," Petros replied, before grabbing the sides of his hat and throwing his head from side to side. "I don't get it!"
"It's okay. It doesn't matter," Carolyn assured him. "Just do what's comfortable for you."
"I feel like such a loser," Petros said sourly. "This shouldn't be a big deal."
"You're not a loser," Carolyn assured him. "Just tell me, what feels okay?"
She come closer and started to rub his arm.
"Not so fast," Petros said. "Okay…that's…very okay."
[Confessional: How many more chapters before we have to move this to the adult site?
Carolyn (United Kingdom): I don't care if Petros is uncomfortable with certain things. What feels right to him is what feels right to me.
Petros (Armenia): [frustrated] Great! The world can see me lose it over some arm touching! Isn't reality television the best?]
Lou sat at one of the tables in the mess hall eating dinner when Symon sat opposite to him.
"Looks like it's just you and me," Symon said as he placed his tray on the table.
"Yeah," Lou nodded.
"Can you believe we're at the final nine?" Symon asked excitedly.
"I know. It's unbelievable," Lou agreed, in the middle of eating a slice of chicken.
"How's the game been for you?" Symon asked.
"Oh, good," Lou nodded.
"Any highlights?"
Lou's eyes went wide but he tried to play it casually.
"I don't know…" he replied, trying his best not to hesitate. "I guess forgiving Pavils was…good. Even if he hadn't really changed that much. There's no point in staying mad at him, you know?"
"I think he changed a good bit," Symon commented. "I consider him a friend of mine. We hung out a lot, especially since the merge."
"Oh, what was that like?" Lou asked curiously.
"He's a good guy. Sure, he has his dumb moments. A lot of those, actually. But, you know, he was there during some tough times."
"Tough times? Oh, you mean like when you were really angry about Petros for a while?" Lou asked.
"Yeah," Symon sighed. "That was definitely the low point for me. But I'm feeling good. That million is so close."
"I know. It's almost scary," Lou chuckled. "The low point for me was the beginning. I kept getting mad at Pavils even though he hadn't done anything wrong since last season. I'm still super embarrassed about that."
"We've all had our ups and downs, but it's worth it," Symon stated. "For one of us, at least."
"I think it's been worth it for most of us. This is a real life changing experience. I've made so many friends, including my Emilia. I hope I'll never forget it, even though I forget a lot of things."
Symon just nodded before getting back to eating.
[Confessional: I hate how espresso is the only thing saving me from two month updates. Is this my 'drug phase'?
Symon (Ukraine): I lied! I am not okay! Seriously – it's the final nine and somehow Petros still has all his allies. How is that possible?
My only hope is to get Sanna and Rikard to my side. But who knows if that will work?
Lou (Cyprus): You know, I'm feeling good about my chances at the moment. I've got an alliance of three, and Petros and Carolyn are still on our side. It should be an easy ride to the final 5]
Ilene and Katerina talked as they prepared dinner for themselves.
"So, Pavils is gone," Ilene sighed.
"Yeah, we're down to three allies," Katerina added. "I don't think I'll miss Pavils as a person."
"He wasn't so bad," Ilene stated. "He definitely had his…moments."
"The fanfiction, knocking out Rikard, telling Sanna to 'fuck the fuck off…" Katerina listed.
"That last one was kind of funny," Ilene giggled.
"Oh well, too bad for him. We're the ones who are still here," Katerina said excitedly as she took some eggs off the pan.
"I know. I still can't believe it," Ilene squealed. "Final nine out of thirty-six."
"Never mind thirty-six. Think about all the people who auditioned to be where we are," Katerina giggled.
"Oh, I remember in the letter that Cartoon Network sent me…" Ilene replied. "They said 'we got over 1,200 audition tapes, and we've chosen you to represent us."
"I don't think they gave me a number," Katerina said. "How many people live in Belgium?"
"Uh, 11 million, I think," Ilene replied.
"Okay, there's 2 million people in Macedonia so…I can't do that maths in my head," Katerina groaned.
"11 million divided by 2 million is 5 and a half so…oh, never mind," Ilene sighed.
Just then, they were joined by Emilia, Rikard and Sanna.
"Hey, guys," Katerina greeted.
"Katerina," Sanna inquired. "Who do you think is the leader of a relationship – the boy or the girl?"
"Excuse me?" Katerina responded in confusion.
"Shouldn't it be 50/50?" Ilene asked.
"Well, yeah in a perfect world, but of the couples in the game – who do you think is the leader more often?" Sanna asked.
"Why do you care?" Katerina asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Look, Rikard here…" Emilia began.
"Can we just forget about this?" Rikard whined, his arms folded.
"Rikard here said there aren't enough relationships where the guy is in charge," Emilia finished off her sentence.
"What!?" Katerina exclaimed.
"That's not what I said!" Rikard screamed.
"Yeah, I can't imagine Rikard saying that," Ilene commented.
"But in a way it makes the most sense," Katerina said shortly after.
"I just said that I noticed that there are a lot more relationships where the girls are in charge," Rikard pleaded. "I never complained about it."
"Oh," Ilene nodded. "Is it true though?"
"Well, let's start with…" Katerina said before Emilia interrupted her.
"We already went through about half of them," she informed her. "So far the score is 4 to 3."
"Hey, it's 4 to 2," Rikard protested.
"But…"
"Anton and I don't count," Rikard said, wagging his finger at Emilia.
"What? Why shouldn't you?" Ilene asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Come on! We already gave up Finn and Sveda," Sanna protested.
"I never said you had to. That was your choice," Rikard pointed out.
"But Finn and Sveda don't exist," Emilia insisted.
"What? Just because of what Stela said?" Rikard protested.
"She almost got Ilene attacked by a bull!" Katerina exclaimed.
"Oh my gosh, keep me out of this," Ilene squeaked as she finished her egg salad. "I'm going for a walk."
"So, who's on either side so far?" Katerina asked.
"Okay, for guys we have Petros, Rikard and Hadi; and for girls we have me, you, Sanna and Eloise," Emilia listed.
"Wait, but Eloise and Vincenz aren't even a couple," Katerina pointed out.
"Really?" Eloise and Rikard said in unison.
"No. They've said many times that they're just friends – though Eloise has said she wants to change that," Katerina shrugged.
"Alright, now we're even!" Sanna exclaimed, clapping her hands.
"Me and Anton still don't count," Rikard pouted.
"I would have personally gone with Carolyn over Petros," Katerina commented.
"Yeah, how did you talk me into that one?" Rikard asked.
"Well, that was sort of what started this in the first place," Emilia pointed out.
"You know, maybe Petros dragging off Carolyn didn't really mean that much. I mean, I remember when they were on my team. Carolyn would spend ages begging Petros to vote with her," Rikard said in memory.
"Wouldn't that make him the dominant one?" Katerina asked.
"How?"
"Well, begging isn't really a sign of being a leader," Katerina pointed out.
"Maybe we should reconsider Alma as well," Emilia suggested.
"Was that really the same thing?" Katerina asked.
"Whose side are you on?" Emilia snapped sourly.
"Nobody's. I don't know the answer," Katerina said in defense.
"Hey, ladies, what are you talking about?" Carolyn greeted as she and Petros walked over to them.
"Who do you think is more dominant? You or Petros?" Emilia asked.
"Excuse me!?" Carolyn frowned, her hands on her hips.
"And we are out of here," Petros stated nonchalantly, and he and Carolyn walked off.
"Okay, that's a point for me," Emilia insisted.
"Oh come on! She spoke first!" Rikard retorted.
"What a lame excuse!" Sanna yelled at him.
[Confessional: That escalated…at a slower pace than before but still pretty quick
Petros (Armenia): [his mouth is wide open in disgust]
Carolyn (United Kingdom): What the bloody f***? The cheek of some people!
What me and Petros do in the woods is nobody's business.]
"Well, that was a nice dinner," Lou stated as he and Symon walked out of the mess hall.
"Yes," Symon smiled. "Nothing says final nine quite like a nice plate of chicken Kiev."
Just then, Petros walked by.
"Hello, Petros," Lou greeted.
Petros froze and his eyes went wide.
"Oh, hello," he said casually. "Didn't…see you there."
After a couple of seconds of silence, Lou asked him, "So…final nine?"
"I know," Petros replied. "I never expected to…"
"You are not going to believe what Emilia just asked us," Carolyn snarled as she caught up with Petros.
"Oh, what?" Symon asked curiously, leaning against the wall of the mess hall.
"She asked us who we think is more dominant – me or Petros?"
"What the hell?" Symon chuckled.
"Oh my f***ing God!" Lou exclaimed. "I'm going to have a word with her."
Once he stomped off, Symon said, "I'm going for a swim, if you want to join me."
"Sure. We may as well use those swimsuits again," Petros shrugged as he and Carolyn followed him.
"What do you mean Emilia is the leader between us?" Lou frowned as he stood in a circle with the others who had been arguing with Rikard.
"Come on, you have to admit it. I'm the one who does the strategy," Emilia pointed out.
"Really? You think the game is the only thing that matters in our relationship?" Lou asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No, but the point of this is that it's 'within the game'," Rikard reminded him.
"Oh, are we only taking that into account?" Sanna asked. "Because there are corrections we could make."
"We still haven't decided on Estrella and Beni," Emilia reminded them.
"I'm sticking by Estrella," Rikard insisted. "She's the strong, fierce one."
"Strong? Have you seen Beni's abs?" Emilia asked.
"What? I have way better abs than him but somehow I'm submissive!?" Lou protested.
"That's up for debate," Rikard sighed, drooling a little. "But, yeah, Estrella. She's the one who does all the circus training. Beni's not that sporty – it's mostly genetics for him."
"I still think Beni's the main man. He's more, you know, out there," Sanna stated.
"They're both pretty out there, but, I don't know, Estrella's more fiery," Rikard shrugged.
"But Beni's not? Didn't he throw Berto off the porch once?" Katerina asked.
"That was a one-time thing! Estrella would always lose her s*** over people calling her Spanish!" Rikard exclaimed.
[Confessional: Apparently two 'l's in Spanish/Catalan is pronounced like a 'y' in English. I went the last two years without knowing that.
Katerina (Macedonia): [pouts] Rikard's scared of being proven wrong or something. The girls and I kept giving him evidence after evidence and he'd just spout rubbish!
Lou (Cyprus): [folds his arms and growls] Some nerve calling me submissive. I don't see Emilia getting suspended for beating people up!]
Symon, Carolyn and Petros all bobbed up and down in the lake.
"Come on, Petros! Take off your shirt!" Carolyn pleaded.
"We've been swimming with our clothes on for most of the season. What's so bad about a shirt?" Petros protested. "Besides, Symon still has his on."
"Symon has his reasons," Carolyn shrugged. "You have nothing to worry about. You've got a gorgeous tan."
"My face and arms are tanned. Is that not enough?" Petros asked, holding out his palms.
"You know, it's not every day that a girl like me gets to see a guy with a full body tan," Carolyn giggled. "Back home, most of the guys get sunburnt, and the few that do tan – they have those weird tan lines. You know, with the outline of the shirt."
"Yeah. Farmer's tan. I'm familiar with that," Petros responded nervously.
Symon laughed slightly at what was unfolding.
"If you take off your shirt, I'll take off my swimsuit," Carolyn offered.
"What!?" Petros exclaimed.
"On the count of three. One, two, three," Carolyn said quickly, before unzipping her suit and letting it fall off. She was, of course, censored with pixels.
Petros screamed for a split second before falling backwards.
"Oh my God!" Symon exclaimed as he paddled over.
"What the f*** did I just do!?" Carolyn gasped as the two of them helped Petros up.
"It's okay, he's coming back," Symon assured her as Petros' eyes opened slightly. "I suggest you…uh…"
"Got it!" Carolyn nodded as she got her swimsuit back on.
"What just happened?" Petros asked as Symon got him upright.
"I'm really sorry for freaking you out," Carolyn squeaked. "I didn't know that you were scared of…um…"
"Oh, it wasn't the…you know…them itself," Petros assured her. "I don't know – you seemed to put me on the spot and it was like I didn't have a choice."
"I should probably leave you two alone," Symon stated before getting out of the water and grabbing the clothes he left by the lakeside.
Petros and Carolyn stood there silently for a few seconds before Petros said, "You know, you seem more traumatized than me."
"Do I now?" Carolyn giggled, before groaning, "I'm just…in shock. How could I do something so stupid?"
"You know, I kind of respect how you just go for what you want and get things done," Petros said, clasping his fingers together. "I wouldn't have gone anywhere in the merge without your social skills. I used your connections to get votes from Emilia and Lou."
"Wait, you're using me?" Carolyn gasped.
"Oh, come on, you know what I mean," Petros sighed, shaking his head.
"Of course," Carolyn assured him, slowly pulling him in for a hug.
"It's my job to be the paranoid one," Petros muttered.
[Confessional: This has been an…interesting installment
Carolyn (United Kingdom): [sighs] Isn't Petros the cutest?
Petros (Armenia): [monotonous] I cannot believe it. Carolyn flashed me. We are not married. We should only be naked with people we are married to. That's what the Bible says.
[he then leans back on the toilet seat and sighs happily]]
Ilene shook her head as she strolled just outside the woods.
"Hello," Symon greeted as he walked over to her. "How are you?"
"I'm fine," Ilene replied. "Have you been near Emilia and Rikard?"
"Not tonight. Carolyn and Petros told me Emilia asked 'who was the more dominant' of the couple," Symon told her."
"Oh no, are they still talking about that?" Ilene groaned.
"What?" Symon asked in curiosity.
"I don't know," she continued, looking down and shaking her head. "Emilia and Rikard are having this debate or something over whether guys or girls are the leaders in relationships these days."
"What the actual…" Symon said, a little disgusted. "I'd expect something like that from Pavils."
"I was thinking the same thing!" Ilene exclaimed.
"I don't know why but, I really miss the guy," Symon sighed.
"Me too," Ilene agreed.
"I mean, yeah, he did stupid things, and said stupid things, but his heart was in the right place. I'd definitely call him a friend," Symon added.
"Yes," Ilene nodded, still staring at the ground.
"Still, we're at a disadvantage. Petros has a four person alliance, while we only have three," Symon groaned. "We're going to have to…"
"It's a bit late for this strategy talk. Can it wait for tomorrow?" Ilene yawned.
"Alright," Symon sighed. "What time is it?"
"I don't know," Ilene replied. "And Farmer Bogas has basically given up."
"The novelty wore off fast for him," Symon stated.
"How is bossing us around a novelty?" Ilene asked, raising an eyebrow.
"You'd be surprised," Symon told her, before yawning himself. "But, I agree, I'm tired. I'm going to go brush my teeth."
"Oh my God! I just realised I have nowhere to sleep," Ilene groaned.
"I'm sure Pavils won't mind if you use his shed," Symon stated.
"Oh, yeah," Ilene remembered.
"Like I said, I'm going to brush my teeth," Symon repeated.
"Me too, and I also…" Ilene replied before stopping herself.
"Oh, classified," Symon said in mock intrigue.
"Stop it," Ilene snarled, before they parted ways.
[Confessional: A spike in Canadian views? Has the legendary rocketman returned?
Farmer Bogas (Slovenia): I haven't really bothered recently because most of the time, the kids are too tired to stay up late.
Last night, however, was very different.]
A stock sound effect of an owl was played as the screen depicted a night vision view of Emilia and co. still arguing.
"Oh, come on, Adrijana totally came onto Marios," Rikard protested.
"Well, yeah, but Marios has blossomed since then," Emilia argued.
"Oh, really? Name three ways in which he's the leader over Adrijana," Rikard said snarkily.
Emilia was about to reply when she squeaked over a sudden blast of a flashlight.
Before the five bickerers was an exhausted Farmer Bogas holding a torch.
He said in a deadly whisper, "What are you doing up at half past eleven!?"
The five all looked at each other in shock, unable to muster up a reply.
"Anyone who is not in bed in the next ten minutes…" Farmer Bogas took several shallow breaths. "…will spend tomorrow morning picking up cow excrement with their bare hands."
With that, they all gasped and swiftly dispersed.
"Emilia, what's excrement?" Lou whispered as they ran to their sheds.
The next morning, as Farmer Bogas sounded his trumpet, a groggy Emilia groaned as she walked out of her shed, only to find that Rikard was already standing outside.
Rikard noticed her, and they stared at each other for a few seconds before collapsing with laughter.
"Can you believe we wasted so much time…" Rikard howled.
"…arguing over who was…oh Jesus, I can't even say it anymore," Emilia chortled. "We can just be the saddest sometimes."
"Oh, I know," Rikard agreed, before continuing with uncontrollable laughter.
"Hey, what are you guys laughing about?" Lou asked as he walked over to them.
"Do you realise we spent last night arguing over…" Emilia asked, before Lou interrupted her.
"Oh my God!" Lou exclaimed, before roaring with laughter. "What the hell is wrong with us?"
"What are you laughing about?" Sanna asked curiously as she wheeled her way over.
[Confessional: Poor Katerina – she wasn't shown at all
Petros (Armenia): This morning I get out of my cabin and there's [Armenian swear word] five or six people pissing themselves laughing for some reason.]
Symon and Petros sat opposite each other as they ate in the mess hall.
"How are you holding up after last night?" Symon asked Petros.
"Hm? I'm fine," Petros replied. "I was just a little shocked is all."
"Okay," Symon nodded, before getting back to eating.
Lou and Sanna entered the mess hall, their lips tightened. They sat down next to the other two boys.
"What do you think…" Symon asked Petros before being interrupted by Lou and Sanna laughing hysterically.
"What's going on; you've been laughing all morning?" Petros asked in irritation.
"Okay…" Lou said as he tried to calm himself down. "We spent all of last night arguing over…over…"
He and Sanna burst out laughing once again.
"We know. You had a fight over whether guys or girls are the leaders in relationships. So funny," Symon exclaimed sarcastically.
"Alright, you had to be there…" Lou sighed.
"I was there! You asked me and Carolyn the question," Petros groaned. "Why would you even want to know?"
"We know. It was stupid – but come on, it's kind of funny that we argued about it for so long," Sanna giggled.
"Ugh," Petros said irritably, before grabbing his plate and moving to another table.
"Rude," Sanna remarked.
A couple of seconds later, Symon also got up.
"I'm not going to let him sit alone," he said in mock-sympathy.
"Also rude," Lou commented, before they continued to laugh.
[Confessional: Ari y u delete account?
Symon (Ukraine): [grips his hands tight around his face]
Petros (Armenia): [slams his head against the back of the confessional]]
"It's challenge time!" Lara announced over the intercom.
As Katerina and Ilene walked over to the giant rock that Lara and Adrijana were standing on as usual, Katerina said to Ilene, "Thanks for letting me share with you last night."
"Don't mention it. It wasn't even my shed," Ilene assured her.
"Okay, you're all here!" Lara exclaimed. "For today's challenge, you will be taking part in a trivia challenge."
"Thank the lord Marios isn't here," Emilia muttered.
"There will be seven rounds," Adrijana explained. "In each round, you will be asked a question and given a number of answers. One of the answers is incorrect. The correct answers will be called out one by one, and then the loser will be eliminated from the challenge."
"In the final round, when there are three left, there will only be one correct answer, and whoever gets it will win immunity," Lara concluded. "That's right. From now on, only one person will be safe from elimination."
"I never thought I'd get to this point," Carolyn said in awe.
"I barely ever get immunity anyway," Petros shrugged.
"Without further ado, let's got on with the first round," Adrijana announced. "But first, you'll need to get life jackets."
"Life jackets?" Rikard repeated.
The nine contestants were at the top of the hill. They were all handcuffed and had rope tied to their knees and ankles. They were all tied into wagons that were against metal posts that had been nailed into the hill. They all wore helmets and life-jackets.
"Anyone else really confused?" Katerina called out.
"Every time someone is eliminated, their metal post will fold down and they will be sent flying down the hill and…hopefully into the lake," Lara explained. "An intern will be there to cut you free."
A few of the contestants looked particularly unsettled.
"To decide the order that you go in, you will be asked a question with a number as the answer," Adrijana said. "The people who are closest to the right answer will go first.
The question is – in the original series, how many episodes did Ezekiel appear in, including episodes where he was already eliminated?"
"Let's start with…" Lara began as she took a number out of a hat. "Emilia."
"Um…" Emilia thought about it for a second. "Fifteen?"
"Sanna?"
"10."
"Ilene?"
"I don't know. 13?"
"Rikard?"
"Uh…11?"
"Lou?"
"Can you repeat the question?" Lou asked.
"How many episodes was Ezekiel in?" Lara asked irritably.
"Oh, one," Lou replied confidently. After a second, he gasped and said, "No! Wait!"
"Petros?"
"Twenty-five."
"Symon?"
"Twenty-four."
Petros smirked at Symon after he said this.
"Katerina?"
"Eighteen."
"And Carolyn?"
"Hm…twenty."
"The correct answer was…
…36."
"Really? That many?" Emilia asked.
"Yes," Petros cheered, nodding his head up and down.
"And now onto the main question," Lara said as Interns #2 and #3 came over holding a piece of cardboard with nine answers written on it.
"No Returns, No Refunds
One Flu Over The Cuckoos
Top Dog
The Enchanted Franken-Forest
I Love You, I Love You Knot
Chinese Fake-Out
The Sand Witch Project
Niagara Brawls
Are We There Yeti?"
"Eight of these are actual names of episodes," Lara concluded. "Petros, we will start with you."
"Hm…I think I'll go with…I guess Top Dog would be an underwhelming wrong answer. I'll go with that," he said.
"Top Dog has been taken," Lara muttered.
"Symon, you're next," Adrijana told him.
"Only the Total Drama producers could have come up with a pun that bad – Are We There Yeti?"
"Carolyn?"
"I like Symon's logic. The Sand Witch Project for me," Carolyn replied.
"Katerina?"
"Um…I think I'll go with…No Returns, No Refunds."
"Emilia?"
"Yeah. What Symon and Carolyn said. Chinese Fake Out."
"Ilene?"
"Niagara Brawls," Ilene shrugged.
"Rikard?"
"One Flu Over The Cuckoos."
"We're down to two. Sanna?"
"Er…I like Enchanted Franken-Forest," Sanna responded.
"And I guess that leaves Lou with 'I Love You, I Love You Knot," Lara concluded.
"Why did I say one episode?" Lou groaned to himself.
[Confessional: This challenge is inspired by the short-lived '101 Ways To Leave A Gameshow'
Lou (Cyprus): [sighs] Hopefully Symon had the right idea.
Carolyn (United Kingdom): I was terrified. God, that hill looked steep.]
"Now that you have all given your answers, it is time to announce the correct answers," Adrijana announced. "The first correct answer is…"
…
…
…
"…Chinese Fake-Out!"
"Yes!" Emilia cheered. "Safe! I love this feeling."
"The next correct answer is…" Lara continued.
…
…
…
"Top Dog."
Petros nodded as he shook slightly.
"Also correct…"
…
…
…
"Niagara Brawls."
Ilene didn't look phased.
"I kind of want to go down," she told Katerina, who smiled and rolled her eyes.
"The next correct answer is…"
…
…
…
"The Enchanted Franken-Forest."
"I agree with Ilene. That dive looks fun," Sanna stated.
Rikard, who was sitting next to her, took several shallow breaths.
"The next correct answer is…"
…
…
…
"…I Love You, I Love You Knot."
"Ooh," Lou said in satisfaction as he took a puff of breath.
"Also safe for this round…"
…
…
…
"Are We There Yet?"
Symon smiled after being told he was safe.
Only Katerina and Rikard remained.
"It's okay…" Rikard told himself. "It's not the real bottom 2."
"The wrong answer is…"
…
…
…
…
…
"…No Returns, No Refunds."
"No!" Katerina cried, before her metal post folded down and she was sent rolling backwards down the hill. "NO!"
She screamed once again as she splashed into the water.
"Oh, thank you," Rikard squeaked as he remained still on the hill.
"Don't worry. She's fine," Lara assured them. "Eight of you are left in the challenge. Join us after the break when one contestant wins immunity, and another goes home empty-handed."
[Confessional: Apparently 'niemals' is not German for 'animals'
Katerina (Macedonia): [pants] My heart when that happened. That was not fun…
I really hope I'm not eliminated tonight.]
And that's the first part of episode 25. Hope you found it satisfying, or at least some other emotional impact.
I have since revealed the Spanish/Catalan contestant - Ximo, the poetic skater.
I can now announce that the fourteenth returning country will be...
...
...
...
...
...
...Portugal
Please review and fav if you haven't already (how did you get this far without doing so lol? Are you only reading this ironically?)
