Chapter XLIV
Erik sat there for a long moment. Damning his mouth to hell.
He knew he shouldn't have told her anything, but she had wanted honesty. And yet he found himself not wanting to tell her the truth. Even now he regretted it. Il Muto was the perfect return for her, and yet she refused on the basis of fairness. To hell with fairness. None of them are as capable of bringing music to life the way she does…
He thought of her upstairs, alone and sleeping. Sadness filled him. He hoped that she was not upset at him for the way he had so coldly dismissed her.
She looks for sympathy… I give her sorrow. She asks for honesty, I've none to borrow. She needs my tender kiss, she silently begs it of me. I give her ugliness! Why does she love me? Beneath this mask I wear there is nothing of me, just horror, shame, despair! And yet… there she is. Why does she love me?
The questions turned over and over in his head. He did not understand it at all. In nature the bird does not mate with the rat, the bird does not look at the rat. They are on two different planes of existence. One is beautiful and soars high above the other, the other resides in the dark, tormented by the outside world for being what it is. A scavenger.
I am a murderer, and yet, silently, she promises me that I am good. But he was not good, and it seemed that she would never understand that. And as much as it frustrated Erik he did not want her to ever lose that faith in him. For if she did he swore he would go mad from rage.
He felt stupid and illogical. He did not deserve her skin or her lips. Good men did. And yet she was there! Waiting for him! While he soaked up his rage down here.
Standing up Erik began making his way hurriedly to the bedroom. He needed her. She provided an ease to the tightness in his chest. It made him want to yell with annoyance. It was an impertinent pain that flared up at the more he thought of the distance between the two of them.
When he approached her bedroom door open he paused before sticking his head inside, "Christine?"
Upon reaching no answer he let his vision roam the room. But she was not there. Erik frowned with sincere confusion. And then fear gripped him. He had seen this before. He had seen the emptiness of her room, and whenever silence greeted him it was never good.
Erik instantly glided towards his bedroom. She had to be there, he had heard her on the second floor!
He pushed the door open frantically and his amber eyes roamed the darkness.
She lay there with her back facing him. She was clearly sleeping. Even in the dark she seemed to glow, basking in the very few rays of the moon.
He approached her silently and walked around until he was at her side of the bed, nearest to the open window. He approached the window and shut it. Silencing the howling wind that had chilled his room. Then he approached her.
"Christine?"
She frowned with annoyance in her sleep and turned onto her back. Her lips parted and for a long moment Erik stood absolutely still. The dark satin bed sheet had slid down to expose one of her clothed breasts. He released a sharp sound and blinked down at her with shock. The darker center of left breast stood taut against the thin fabric of her nightgown.
"Christine," he whispered her name out breathily and sat beside her, dropping his head into his hands. He felt the tightening starting at his groin. It made him feel disgusting as she lay vulnerable to his gaze. And yet he couldn't remove the image from his head. He felt like a rabid dog. He had yet to see her naked and yet the slightest hint of what lay beneath all those damned fabrics made him lose his self-control.
"Erik?" She whispered it out in her sleep and shifted behind him. He looked to her and found her frowning
"I'm here Christine," he murmured gently and stroked her cheek as she dreamed.
She did not respond, she turned her face to his hand and rested her lips against his thumb. He drew in one hard breath. But he did not dare draw his thumb away from her full pink lips.
"God help me," he whispered and turned her face towards him.
As soon as he kissed her Christine woke up with a victorious ghost smile. But the memory of her victory died as fast as it had come. His mouth was slow like molten lava against her own. And then, to her extremely shock she felt him shifting so that he was above her. Her breathing sped underneath his own as he pressed the length of his body to her own.
Christine dragged her mouth to his jaw and he was fully aware that she was now awake. His breathing became heavy above hers as his erection strained against the cloth of his pants. She gasped slightly at the hardness pressed at the inside of her leg. She hadn't even realized that she had parted her thighs.
"Now, Erik please?" She breathed and claimed his mouth again. Her hands searched for the bed sheet that acted as a barrier between the two of them and she began to angrily rip it away from between them.
"No, no-
"Yes," she whispered hungrily back. He hated the urge to have her. It didn't agree with the part of him that was so slowly fading. He wanted her. He wanted her body so badly it was painful.
"Christine, are you certain?" he murmured around her mouth. This couldn't be happening, could it? There was an all-consuming fire raging inside of his body, and try as he might he could hardly think of anything else. Flames were rising up off of her skin and before he could stop himself his hands were on her breasts, caressing and memorizing.
She gasped at the feeling of his hands there. She had often touched her breast when she was bathing but it never felt like this. It felt so amazingly… tingling. A whimper of pleasure rolled through her throat as his palms pressed against her hardened nipples. She stole a lick as his lip.
"No, no, no we cannot," Erik began to retreat but Christine latched onto his collar and did not allow him to pull away. Yet again her mouth was on his and he did not protest.
"Touch me again," she pleaded softly, in the dark he could see her darkened gaze. She looked different, she looked transformed with her lust, lust for me, he relished with fascination, "Erik—
"Yes Christine," he murmured and lowered his mouth to her throat. He would give her satisfaction. Her skin never tasted so delectable.
Her legs widened and he settled between them eagerly. A hard breath left him as his erection pressed against her leg. He dared not move his body up. If he came into contact with her he knew that would be it.
"Take this off," she whispered almost greedily and tugged at his collar, "please."
"No, no Christine," he shook his head and kissed her jaw tenderly, her fingers rested on his throat, "I will give you a different type of pleasure lest you should be scarred by this horrible body."
He could feel the protest building up within her but his lips were already on hers, claiming it and silencing her.
He gave a series of hard exhales, and it felt as if though every breath shot down between her legs. She knew that this was true insanity, she couldn't help the things she was saying or doing or wanting. Somewhere, in the more logical side of her she knew that Erik had knowledge of this too.
"Erik, please," her breath escaped her and suddenly she raised her hips up and rolled them against his thigh.
His breath choked itself out of him at her gesture. He quickly pinned her hips down with one hand. She whispered his name out but he hardly heard it. Blood was rushing to the already painful erection. And his pulse was in his ears.
"No, no," Erik dragged himself away from her with as much control as he could. But she grabbed him by the collar and kept him to her. When he raised himself she followed stubbornly and glared up at him, "Christine-
"Don't leave me like this," she whispered with lust in her voice, "please… Erik you've done this to me."
"No Christine," he pleaded softly, "you are not ready-
"I am," she whispered out, staring up at where she believed his face to be, "I want you."
"I'm going to hell," he murmured quickly before pulling her hair gently back and latching his mouth to hers. He ripped the mask violently off and then fisted his hands in the material of her nightgown, "lay back," he ordered around her lips. She shivered under the command and curiously obeyed as he kissed her neck gently. Christine became breathless all over again and the trickle of his fingertips up her thigh was achingly slowly.
"What are you—
"Shh," he ordered. He silenced a groan against her throat as his hips involuntarily pressed his stiffened ever against her thigh in one jerky movement. When he had the dress up by hips he began to eagerly tug down at the underwear she wore. Her breath picked up as Erik sat up and stared down at her. She caught the flash of his amber gaze and held her breath eagerly.
He pulled the fabric down her legs until it was at her ankles. She blushed violently and he quickly cursed the darkness. His eyesight was good, but he could not capture her form as much as he wanted to. He could feel his breath rushing out of him as he stared down at her. He could hardly think of anything but the beautiful form beneath him. He could even see the gleam of her white thighs. But it was not enough. He was blinded not by the dark, but by the curiosity.
But, he still knew that she was magnificently beautiful. Even if he could not see her fully. He never felt so unworthy of her, and then that selfish pride strung itself up again. She was his.
Erik quickly rested his hand on her taught stomach and began dragging his hand slowly down.
"Erik," she breathed and shut her eyes tightly, knowing he could not see her perfectly in the dark. She hoped he couldn't see the redness that had spread to the base of her neck. She could feel his fingers trickling like water drops down her stomach and she knew where it was headed but she had no idea of what it was he planned to do.
When his hand rested on the cut hair of her mound, heat flashed in one hot burst through her and her entire body stiffened. Erik watched her with interest as he knowingly pressed the pad of his thumb, the same one she had kissed earlier, against the hood of her heat.
"Oh! Erik," it escaped her in one gasp and her head rose and fell against the pillow gracefully. She wanted to watch, but she found herself unable to hold the weight of her head up.
"Do you know what it is that makes this so beautiful?" Erik's voice was at her ear and yet nowhere near her, she stared up at the ceiling with fascination as he circled his finger right there, "I expect an answer, my love."
"N-n-no," she whispered and made a move to roll her hips but his other hand pressed down on her side, stilling her movement and making her a prisoner to her own body and his hands.
"Your inexperience Christine," he whispered, everywhere and nowhere, she thought she was losing her mind, "you do not know what to expect. Your body will react however I want it to. If I do this—
"Oh God…"
He smirked and repeated the motion, gliding his thumb up her center and to the peak, the slick warmth made him shudder, cracking his control slightly, "you will fall apart so easily," he stated and bent low to her ear, "you are so close…"
"Erik," she whimpered and wrapped her arms around him. He bit her earlobe slightly and flicked his finger against the root that caused her so much pleasure and torture, "please-please-
"Please what?" He licked her throat and shut his eyes, breathing hard to control himself. She was pleading him, and he relished in the sounds of such a beauty needing him. Yearning and craving him.
"Please!"
"Do you even know what you want Christine?" he teased lightly and drew his mouth to hers, she released a sharp mewl and trembled wickedly against his body, he could not believe what he was doing, "I will show you what it is that you want." His voice had darkened considerably.
With a glide of his thumb down her slick heat and then another to the top he watched her began to pant, her chest, still clothed, rose and fell quickly. Her hips rebelled under the pressure of his right hand, she was attempting to raise her his but he would not let her. He removed his hand.
"No!" She cried out with dismay and outrage.
"You want a beast Christine," he reminded her in her ear. She gave the slightly whimper, it sent a chill through him, "what do you think your God would say about that?"
"I do not care," she urged him as he eased the pressure on her hip so that she would raise her hips only the slightest bit, she held him closer. He breathed in the scent of her hair and locked his hips so that they would not roll against her, "take me, take me, take me."
"Yesss," he hissed quietly in her ear and bit her neck gently. Quickly Erik returned his hand down to her and rubbed his slickened thumb against her, "do you feel that pressure, building inside of your heavenly body Christine?" he wondered gently, kissing her jaw and cherishing her, so beautiful, all mine, "that is your body craving me."
"You…" she breathed out and bit her bottom lip, shutting her eyes tightly as he moved his finger quickly against there, pressing tighter, and tighter, circling faster and faster. "Oh! Erik!"
Her back arched off and lifted him slightly with it as she approached the brink of her sanity.
Her entire body stiffened and her arms wrapped tightly around his neck. She felt it, and so did he, as she fell over the very steep cliff. Her entire body seemed to suddenly roll with a tremor and her jaw went slack, her throat tightened and gleamed as they caught light. He swallowed the sound of her cries and cupped her tightly. She shuddered, shook, and trembled against him with dim lights flickering behind her eyelids. Figuratively at least. But the pleasure she knew could not be described in any other way. She released a soft cry against him when her hips jerked once against his hand, sensitive as the feeling washed over her and settled like a mist, the tornado had gone out.
He felt her tongue weakly skating against his upper lip, tasting him devilishly as her angelic frame quivered beneath his demonic body. Her eyes tightened as one last tremor rocked through her lightly.
"Breathe," he murmured as she struggled for breath.
He threw himself to the side and shut his eyes as Christine lay beside him. He would get no pleasure tonight, he knew that. But he did not care about that. Just having her beside him was enough ecstasy to keep him for the night.
Erik's arms wound around her waist and he pulled her tightly against his chest. She rolled until she had her face pressed against his collarbone. When she shivered he wrapped the bed sheet around both of their bodies. Erik, despite all of his control, could not help but touch her lower back. He loved the smoothness of her flesh, it was so unlike his. He had never known skin could be so smooth.
"That was magnificent Erik," she whispered, a lazy smile was working its way up to her face "and yet that was nothing like what Jessica had described."
He smirked at her short breath, "what she had described would feel much better. But there are many ways for a man and a woman to experience pleasure without having intercourse Christine."
She frowned sleepily, shyly, "you did not get any pleasure."
"It was a pleasure watching you. That is enough for me Christine-
"No," she shook her head stubbornly and when she made a move to sit up he tightened his arms about her, not ready to let her free yet. The warmth of her frame was providing immeasurable peace to him, "Erik I want to be joined as one with you."
He shut his eyes tightly and shook his head, "Christine my body is not like yours. I am scarred and hideous. I am not beautiful."
"I do not care for that," she murmured and pressed her lips to his jaw, he smiled slightly, he had never felt so content, "please let me see you. You are mine Erik."
"Yes Christine…"
"When can we be together?" She asked softly. Hoping he did not hear the eagerness in her tone.
He did hear it, and it made him more confident than words could ever illustrate, "two days Christine. I must prepare certain things to ensure that you do not have a child. Give me two days and I promise that we will be one." What am I saying?
Christine nodded sleepily and shut her eyes, "this will be a long two days…"
He winced at the throbbing against his leg, "it certainly will be."
:ooo Did you all expect I'd wait till 45? Nope, hahaha!
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