Chapter 46

Ellen opened the door of the downstairs loft and saw three men – or two men and an angel in a male body – gazing raptly at the TV screen. In her experience, there were only two possibilities. Either it was sports, or there were naked women involved. She stepped in and closed the door, glancing at the TV. Half-naked women. Good enough.

She walked across the living room and went into the kitchen to start dinner. She figured she'd better get it going now in the hope that the power would stay on long enough to cook it. Electric stoves could be damned inconvenient when the power shut down. She'd had propane for heat and cooking at the Roadhouse, but here they were stuck with what the apartments came equipped with.

Very little sound came from the three guys. Apparently Castiel qualified as a guy in this situation. Ellen was amused as she pulled together a quick and easy casserole that wouldn't take a long time to cook. Once it was in the oven, she settled down in front of Sam's computer. He appeared to be researching non-fatal sexual assaults in Salt Lake City over the past ten years. She glanced over at the boys. It seemed that Sam wasn't going to let the matter of the masher in the basement drop, no matter what his brother said.

Family. Always looking out for each other, even when it wasn't wanted. She distinctly remembered directing Dean on the path of his wandering little brother once a few years back when Sam had tried to lose him. It appeared that turnabout was fair play.

Fortunately, America's Next Top Model had given way to Top Chef by the time Jo came down. Her daughter could be the slightest bit judgmental, and she had an odd reaction to most of what happened between Dean and Castiel. Hell, she still had half a thing about Dean. The only things holding it in check were her sense of dignity and a desire not to be humiliated.

They ate dinner family-style, apart from Castiel. He merely sat at the table and provided infrequent additions to the conversation. It was surprisingly easy to get used to. They talked about movies and music and Dean's opinion of their car – not good – avoiding all serious topics altogether. No past hunts, no current events, no questions about sexuality of any kind. It seemed like everyone was trying to be good.

Then the power went out, and this time it stayed out. Sam and Dean were prepared. Hunters always were. Three penlights went on almost simultaneously, and Dean had a full on flashlight. He went over and turned on a radio. "Maybe they'll be able to tell us when the power will be back on," he said.

It came on, sort of staticky and weak, but they could hear enough. ". . . winds knocked the tree down, taking out a whole string of power poles along that stretch of . . . power will be out . . . possibly till mid-afternoon on Tuesday . . ."

"So, why don't you ladies go up and get yourselves some blankets?" Dean suggested blithely.

"Why?" Jo asked, always ready to challenge any idea not her own.

"Because the furnace is electric, and your apartment is practically all windows," Dean replied without a trace of condescension. "That's one reason why I took this one."

"Afraid of the cold?" Jo asked.

"Fewer points of entry," Dean said with a shrug, and Ellen hid a grin behind a mug of coffee. "Besides, the bed that place came with wasn't big enough for a sasquatch, and I knew Sammy was joining me, probably before he was all the way recovered."

"From the pig disease," Castiel put in unexpectedly.

Dean glanced at him and nodded. "Yes, from the pig disease."

"You know, it hasn't been found in any American pigs," Sam said.

Dean gave him a dubious look, shook his head, then cleared his throat ostentatiously. "Anyway, the point is that this place is already fairly warm. With five bodies in it – assuming Cas stays – it will stay that way. We'll use the same arrangement we had the first couple of nights, you ladies in the bed and Sam on the couch."

"Maybe you should take the couch, Dean," Sam suggested, and Dean turned a glare on his brother. "Or not, I don't care."

That settled, Ellen collared Jo and dragged her upstairs to get their blankets and pillows. When they got back down, Sam and Dean had already set the table for poker by flashlight. "Cards, huh?" Ellen asked.

"I thought about suggesting charades, but that would involve an awful lot of explanation to Cas," Dean said.

"And poker won't?"

Castiel sat down at the table. "I have watched Dean play many times. I believe I understand the rules."

The angel proved to be a canny player. Definitely a newbie, but not a stupid newbie. It kept them busy for a while, Dean reminding Sam periodically of his tells until Sam growled at him to shut up because he was the one who'd beaten the nine-hundred-year-old poker shark. When she noticed Dean concealing yawns, Ellen stretched theatrically and suggested that it was time for bed.

Sam looked surprised, but then he glanced at Dean and agreed. Ellen wanted to kick him under the table. The kid had no subtlety. The thing that alarmed them both, however, was that Dean didn't even seem to notice. "Yeah, that's probably a good idea. My nap earlier got interrupted by a couple of guys arguing about what they were going to do with me."

"What?" Jo asked. "Was it a dream?"

"Nope, just my brother and my angel, making plans for me like always."

"Dean, we're just worried about you," Sam said.

It was clear that Sam had a whole lot more to say, but Dean cut him off. "Yeah, I know sasquatch, but I'm not five. I can take care of myself."

All three of the other humans tactfully failed to remind him of the fact that he'd been conspicuously failing to take care of himself for some time. Castiel apparently didn't know much about tact.

"You have been attacked repeatedly without any ability to stop it, and you did not, in fact, prevent the last attack from being successful."

Dean flinched very slightly, but it was noticeable. "Yeah, Cas, thanks for that. Anyway, good night all." With that, he went and grabbed a couple of blankets and a pillow, ostentatiously ignoring the rest of them. Sam grabbed Castiel by the arm and dragged him aside for a talking to. Ellen grabbed Jo when she would have followed and suggested that she make the bed while her mother picked up. In short order, they were all snugged down in their assigned beds. All but Castiel, that is.

Ellen lay thinking for a while, contemplating the situation they found themselves in. Dean seemed about ready to either explode or implode, and she didn't know how to defuse him. Clearly Sam didn't, not that she found that altogether surprising. Their relationship was complicated to say the least. Still, Bobby seemed pretty lost, too. Dean just never let his emotions show. It made it very difficult to address them with him.

Tomorrow she'd have to approach him. No, she'd have to send Sam and Jo upstairs and then approach him. He wouldn't talk in front of them. Decision made, she closed her eyes and fell asleep.

She wasn't sure what time it was when she felt herself get prodded awake. She sat up onto her elbows. "What? Something wrong?"

Jo pointed. "Look," she said in a low voice. "Do you see that?"

Ellen squinted across at Dean lying on the floor. Castiel lay beside him on his back, his arms crossed, his eyes on the ceiling. Dean had cuddled up to him. "Yeah, why?"

"Why won't he just admit it?"

"Admit what?" Ellen asked. She must be missing something.

"That they're together," Jo said. "Why lie about it?"

"You woke me up for that?" Ellen asked. "Go to sleep."

"Mom –"

"Go to sleep, JoAnna Beth, and don't you dare wake Dean up." Shaking her head, Ellen rolled over, punched the pillow and fell back asleep.


Sam woke to light shining in his eyes. Next time he slept on this sofa, he needed to remember to put his head at the other end because the sun shone right in his eyes by mid-morning. He opened his eyes, shielding them from the light. He could hear quiet noises in the kitchen, which meant that someone else was already awake. He shifted sideways and sat up, scratching his head.

The bed was empty, so Ellen and Jo were up. He stretched, and glanced over to where Dean had lain out his blankets. He stared, jaw dropping. Dean was cuddled up against Castiel, who was lying on his back on the floor, clearly nowhere near asleep. Sam didn't know what to think. Dean literally had his head pillowed on Castiel's chest. It really looked like there was more going on there than either of them was admitting, but he supposed looks could be misleading. Either way, Dean was going to be embarrassed when he woke up and realized that everyone else had seen him.

Sam got up and stretched, went to the bathroom, then went to find out what Ellen and Jo were up to. Evidently the power was still not back on. Ellen had a propane camp stove sitting on the counter and was making bacon. "Hey," he said, that being about what he was capable of before coffee. He poured himself a cup and took a swallow. "Where's Jo?"

"She went upstairs to get dressed," Ellen said. "How'd you sleep?"

"Fine." Sam glowered at the coffee and demanded that it perk him up faster. "You?"

"Okay, except Jo felt the need to wake me up and tell me that Dean and Cas were getting it on."

"What?" Sam turned to look at his brother and the angel. "They were?"

"No," Ellen said, sounding exasperated. "They were just lying mostly like they are now. What is with you two? Is there a reason I don't know about to assume that those two are intimate?"

"They're really close," Sam said reluctantly. "With a weird intensity."

"I'm not sure you can base your judgment on human norms, Sam," Ellen said, and Sam blinked at her. "Castiel's an angel. Maybe that's just the way they are."

Sam shook his head. "I'm not sure what to think," he said. "I just . . . it worries me sometimes."

"What worries you?" Ellen asked.

Sam grimaced. "I don't know. That's the problem. I just . . . worry."

Ellen sighed and handed him a plate with pancakes and bacon. "That's rough, kid. Try to relax. We've all got plenty to worry about. Don't go looking for more things."

Good advice, but Sam didn't seem to be constitutionally capable of taking it. He sat down with his plate, and then Jo came down and got one for herself. After he was done eating, he'd better take their phones down to the car and charge them so they'd be able to get calls.

Movement from Dean's bedding made Sam turn, and he saw Castiel slipping gently out from under Dean, letting him down gently to the floor. The angel rose and walked over, not even bothering to dust off his clothes. "Why'd you do that?" Sam asked.

"Do what?"

"Lie down with him?" Jo asked.

Sam shot her a glare. "Why did you get up just now?"

"Dean is about to awaken," Castiel said soberly. "He would be embarrassed to wake up under those circumstances, don't you think?" Sam nodded. "And as for lying down with him, the temperature on the floor is approximately seven degrees colder than the sofa, and fifteen degrees – or more – colder than the bed. I increased my body temperature to give him extra warmth."

"Very kind of you," Ellen said, giving her daughter a stern look.

At that moment Dean began to stir, and Sam had to hold himself back from rushing over to find out how his brother was. Dean wouldn't thank him for being that much of a ninny.


Dean awoke feeling very comfortable, not at all like the last time he'd slept on the floor. Then he'd been stiff and achy from the chill, but this morning he felt warm and relaxed. He rose and went to the bathroom, where it was shivery cold and dark. He hit the light switch, expecting the light to come on because the power had to be back on, otherwise he'd have been colder than the last time he'd slept on the floor. It didn't. He did his business and, after washing his hands in frigid water, elected not to take a shower. He hoped the insulation around the pipes held.

When he went out into the living room again, Sam had tidily folded up his blankets and put them with his pillow on the bed. Ellen had clearly been at breakfast-making for some time, because the apartment smelled of bacon. That was the other reason he'd thought the power was on, but when he looked at the counter, he saw the propane stove.

Cas stood by a window, gazing out, Jo sat at the table, finishing her food, but there was no sign of Sammy. "Where'd Sam go?" he asked.

"Good morning to you, too, Dean," Ellen said, and he grimaced. "He went downstairs with all of our phones to get the cars started and charge them. With three cars working, it shouldn't take too long."

Dean shrugged, nodding. That was true enough. "Did the power come on for a while last night?"

"Nope," Ellen said. "Radio says they should have it fixed by noon."

"For noon read three and you're probably closer," Dean remarked, and Ellen snorted agreement. Jo just rolled her eyes. "Well, I woke up toasty warm, and I just wondered why."

"Just lucky, I guess," Ellen said, but the reactions of the other two made Dean think twice about her answer. Jo glanced furtively at Cas, and the angel turned around, looking slightly alarmed. Cementing his doubt into certainty, Ellen rolled her eyes.

"What happened?" he demanded.

"Cas decided it was too cold for you on the floor, so he gave you some extra heat," Ellen said.

Dean grinned. "Hey, thanks, Cas. That's a useful talent." The angel merely nodded.

Jo rolled her eyes. "Why don't you two just come clean?" she asked, giving them each a narrow-eyed look.

"I am not dirty," Cas said.

Dean had been about to ask what she was talking about, but he liked Cas's answer, even if it did indicate a misunderstanding of the idiom Jo was using. "And I'm not taking a shower in that bathroom. Do you know how cold that water is? Talk about shrinkage!" He shuddered dramatically for effect.

"That's not what I'm talking about. I –"

"Jo, I think I put some bread in the cupboard upstairs," Ellen said suddenly. "Why don't you go get it? I think I'd like some toast."

"Toast sounds great," Dean said.

Jo looked like she was about to protest, but when her mother raised an eyebrow, she went. When the door was shut, Cas turned a grateful look on Ellen, and Dean decided he'd had enough. "Exactly what was that all about?" he asked.

"Apparently Jo has conceived the notion that you and I are engaged in an intimate relationship, partially as a result of the manner in which I provided you with heat."

"And how was that?" Dean asked.

"I lay down beside you and raised my body temperature. This had the effect of causing you to . . . move closer. I believe Jo has misinterpreted the –"

"Excuse me!" Dean exclaimed, and he hurried upstairs. He did not want Jo going around with the notion that he was engaged in interspecies dating. He'd leave that one to Sam, thank you very much.


With all of the children gone, Ellen turned to Castiel. "Would you like some coffee?"

"No thank you. I do not require –"

"I know you don't require it, do you want it?" Ellen said.

Castiel blinked at her. "Is this a human norm? Offering beverages as a prelude to serious conversation?"

Ellen chuckled. "Yes, and it's often coffee."

"It is bitter and somewhat acidic."

"You can add cream and sugar to lighten the flavor," Ellen suggested, and she poured two cups off coffee, then put the non-dairy creamer and a bowl of sugar on the table.

Castiel took his coffee, seated himself and contemplated the choice of additions soberly. She sat across from him and waited for him not to be distracted. They didn't have unlimited time, but Dean was going to read Jo the riot act, and Sam had five phones to charge with only three cars. They had more than a couple of minutes.

After a few moments, when she didn't speak, Castiel looked up. "Please, say whatever it is you have to say."

Ellen moistened her lips, took a sip of coffee, and then cleared her throat. "That really was very sweet of you, to give Dean some extra warmth. It's not as if he would have frozen to death."

Castiel picked up the carton of creamer and poured some into the coffee. "He is not well," the angel replied without looking up.

"No, that's true," Ellen said. She watched Castiel taste the sugar, consider, and then put two teaspoons into the coffee. He stirred, and she smiled to see him working so very seriously at the act of doctoring his coffee. "This may seem an impertinent question," she started, and then she paused because he looked up unexpectedly.

"I do not smite people for impertinent questions," he said, and she couldn't tell at first that he was making a joke. The only sign was a very subtle twinkle in his eye.

She smiled. "How do you feel about Dean?"

Castiel tilted his head for a moment, clearly thinking about the question. "A year ago, in your understanding of time, I would have said that angels do not have those sorts of feelings."

"And what would you say now?"

"Now . . . I rebelled against Heaven because I believed in him." Castiel paused, his eyes distant. "He failed in the task my rebellion enabled him to attempt, but . . ." He sighed. "I may have waited too long. I did not dare act too soon, or Zachariah would have been able to stop us, but I think I acted too late."

"That kind of thing can be hard to judge," Ellen said sympathetically.

"Perhaps," Castiel said. "And at that time, I had limited experience in thinking for myself."

"What makes you think it was too late?" Castiel's brows knit. "I mean, is there something more than the fact that Dean wasn't able to . . . I'm really not sure what he was trying to do."

Castiel took in a deep breath, and Ellen wondered what benefit the angel derived from that, or if it was a mannerism borrowed from his human host. "I have studied Dean's memories of that night. I believe that if Dean had reached Sam before he had actually begun to kill Lilith, he might have been able to get through – if he could have gotten past Ruby. As it was, he almost got through." Castiel shook his head.

"Well, all of that tells me what you think of him," Ellen commented after a moment of silence between them. "How do you feel about him?"

"Are they not the same thing?" Castiel asked.

Ellen shrugged. "This is kind of a delicate subject, and I would never say anything about it in front of them, but do you really think that the way Dean feels about his brother is exactly the same as what he thinks of him?"

Castiel's eyes widened very slightly, as if it was a thought he hadn't considered before. "No, it's not." To Ellen's relief, he didn't go into detail about the difference. "And why do you wish to know how I feel?"

"It's not just idle curiosity, but I can't really tell you until I know," Ellen said. "Can you trust me on this?"

Once again Castiel fell silent for several moments. Ellen was beginning to feel the press of time. Sooner or later, Dean and Jo would come back, and she didn't want to be talking about this at that point. She kept that impatience off her face, but she had an uneasy feeling that Castiel didn't need the expressions on her face to know how she was feeling.

"I care very deeply for Dean," the angel said at long last. "If love means that I would die for him, then I love him."

The door opened and Dean walked in, Jo close behind him.. "You really need to get a grip, Jo. Not everyone who lies down together in bed – or on the floor – or on a cot – anywhere – is having sex. Or even necessarily wants to have sex. He's a dude!" He strode across the room, then turned around. "Wait, he's not even a dude. He's a dude condom." His brows wrinkled. "Or wait, no, that would be Jimmy." He blinked uneasily, seeming to lose track of the argument. "Which would make Cas the penis. Ick."

Castiel had turned to watch their conversation. "You have said that all angels were dicks," he observed.

Dean stared at him for fully five seconds, then shook his head. "And the angel is developing a sense of humor. This is one hell of a weird week."

"Could be weirder," Ellen said, wondering what he'd think if he knew her week included an angel declaring love for a human man. That conversation would either have to be finished later, or she'd never get another chance. Now was clearly out of the question, and she tamped down firmly on her frustration.

"What? You mean I could be playing drop the soap with a witch?" He shrugged. "That would be weird."

That hadn't been what she meant, but she wasn't going to explain just now.