Chapter 51

It was early in the new year and Blair was just getting over her cold, which had turned into a near bout of the flu, so she'd been relegated to her bed for the duration of almost a week while Chuck made sure she was taken care of. Now though she was starting to feel better and decided to return to the 'land of the living' where she ached to return to hold her children in her arms again, ached to return to work, and especially ached to be with Chuck again, after he'd spent the week sleeping either on a sofa in their bedroom or in bed with her but wearing a medical mask. (He was just as paranoid of germs as she was, even though he'd gotten a precautionary flu shot back in October.)

That afternoon, Blair got out of bed after a nap with the urge to go to the bathroom. As she was walking to the bathroom, she suddenly, distinctly heard the sound of someone playing the piano downstairs in the living room. Knowing that the piano was seldom touched, since it once belonged to her mother, Blair became a little angry at the thought of what was most likely one of the maids' or housekeepers' attempting to imitate Beethoven on her mother's piano. When she heard part of Beethoven's 5th suddenly become interrupted by the sudden banging of several bass notes in quick succession, Blair became angry and hurried down the stairs, intent on confronting whoever was touching the piano.

With a heavy retort ready on her lips, Blair marched into the living room ready to confront whoever was in the room pounding on the piano, when she stopped short and glanced up to see Chuck sitting at the piano with their son on his lap, as he played a song for the child, then let the little boy pound on the piano himself. The both of them looked so happy and Blair was surprised at what a touching scene it was, father and son at the piano together. She watched them a moment longer as Chuck let the toddler pound on the keys again, then chuckle as he whispered praise to the lad and kissed the top of his soft, light brown hair.

Clearing her throat, Blair let her presence be known, as Chuck glanced up and greeted her. "Oh hello darling, you're up. I hope we didn't disturb you. Still are you feeling better or do I need to wear my mask?" he teased.

"No need for a mask Jacko, I'm feeling better, so no need to worry. Still what gave you the urge to suddenly show our son the piano? Especially since its my late mother's piano. " she asked, curious to what he'd say.

"Oh I just felt like it. I heard a song at the office today that reminded me of when my father had me take piano lessons as a child. Then one of my co workers mentioned how his children are taking piano lessons and it made me think that our children couldn't learn any younger, so I brought them down here to learn for themselves...or at least hear me play." he mentioned as he played a simple tune.

"Really? Well I guess that's just as much reason as any. I rather forgot you could play the piano dear, and have let my mother's piano sit in the corner gathering dust, figuratively speaking of course since I make sure the maids dust it nearly every day. White glove test and all." she replied as she slowly sat down beside Chuck on the piano bench and reached for their son.

"White glove test? I wouldn't expect anything less from you darling." he laughed as he played on, making up lyrics to the tune he played.

"Put on your old blue bra strap that used to be your ma's strap and come for a tussle in the hay..." he sang.

"What are you singing?" she gasped.

"Put on your old pink panties that used to be your aunties...with the hole in the middle where the boys liked to diddle...and come for a tussle in the hay..." he teasingly sang.

"Chuck! What the heck ARE you singing? Old blue bra strap? Old pink panties...with the hole the middle where the boys liked to diddle?...CHUCK! That's the silliest song I've ever heard. Like I'd ever own a pair of ripped underwear!" Blair gasped as she chastised him, trying to suppress a laugh.

"Oh I don't know about that...What about that pink bikini with the black lace around the edge? If I remembered correctly they tore easily enough the last time you wore them..." he seductively teased.

"Oh yes that bikini. The one you tore when you tried to take my clothes off with your teeth and the underwear didn't survive you efforts? Well I threw them away!" she replied.

"Aw...that's too bad! I wanted to save them for a trophy of my...prowess. Hmm...do you have any other pairs that I or anyone else...helped you with?" he asked.

"I don't remember right now...and anyway Chuck you're the only one who's ever torn my underpants trying to get to me." she replied.

"Ah well that's good to know. Hmm...yes I remembered that time now when I said I'd throw you on the bed, tear your clothes off with my teeth, and give you a night like you'd never forget...then I proved I am a man of my word. So do you want to do it again? It's been over a week...and as you know, the Bass man's always raring to go! And this piano brings back memories too...if you remember two years ago?" he teased as he gave her an infamous smirk.

"Yes...it's been ten days...but who's counting? And I do recall that time two years ago when we had my mother's place to ourselves, and I caught you playing piano in the nude after I'd beat you at strip croquet on the Wii and we'd had sex in the living rom. Then yes of course what we did afterwards on the piano...Dorota had quite the time polishing it the next day...ha ha ha." she laughed as she recalled that time, then sighed as she said "Still though, we have the kids now, and I just got out of a sick bed...I don't know if I want to...on the piano...even if it was fun that one time."

"Ah...that's too bad, but I understand. I'll make it up to you tonight though. We'll go out to dinner, just the two of us, then we can have a relaxing evening together, do you know what I mean? That is if you're feeling better." he replied.

"Yes I am, thanks for being so considerate. A nice quiet dinner sounds wonderful. But...oh what time do you want to leave? It's already 3:30 and I look like a mess! Plus anyway, why are you home so early? Nothing happened at work, did it?" she sighed, as she brushed the hair off his forehead.

"Oh I wouldn't say nothing, but before you panic it wasn't anything bad, Blair. You just happen to be looking at the new owner of the Empire Hotel and bar." he smugly admitted as he glanced at her from the corner of his eye.

"Really? That's great! So the deal went through then? The previous owner was able to agree to your demands and the price you were willing to offer?" she happily replied, giving him an impromptu hug and kiss.

"Yes after much negotiations, we were able to bring something to the bargaining table that would seal the deal and acquire the Empire Hotel to be under the flagship of Bass Industries. Now its just a matter of bringing everything there up to our standards so that when guests stay there, they'll know they're staying at a Bass Industries owned hotel." Chuck declared as he wrapped an arm casually around her.

"Hmm...that sounds impressive. Yes bring it up to our impeccable standards so that the guests will know that you should be taken seriously indeed. So are you thinking about making the Empire to resemble the Palace, and taking the franchise route as well? Even though franchising could turn you a decent profit, sometimes those franchised hotels can turn out to be somewhat cheesy." she pondered aloud.

"Franchising is a route that I'm seriously considering, however right now I and the rest of the company want to focus on rebuilding the Empire and bringing it under the flagship of Bass Industries, and pay off the remaining mortgage, before we will even consider franchised hotels through our company. Still though you don't want to see a bevy of Bass Hotels sprout up around cities, airports, and suburbs, like Hilton's or Holiday Inns?" he replied, teasingly at the end.

"Well...in some ways I wouldn't mind because I could definitely see how we could turn a tidy profit from such a venture, but still the thought of our name being linked to cookie cutter, carbon copy hotels and motor inns throughout the Midwest doesn't sound very appealing to me because obviously your franchisees would be unable to maintain the high standard of elegance and service that the Palace for example prides itself on. Especially since the level of customer that would frequent the Bass Hotels in outlaying areas would definitely not be the class of people that we get here in New York. Now if we were to open a hotel like the Palace in say...Paris, France..." Blair haughtily declared.

"Blair! I get your point, and agree on the level of customer we like to cater to and associate our image with here in New York, however we can't just limit ourselves to the upper crust of society, especially in this economy, our else we won't succeed. Either way, the franchise idea is one my company is considering heavily for the future, but first things first, and that is getting the Empire ready to launch under the Bass Industries name and that will take some time. Anyway why are you so adverse to the idea of franchised hotels in the Midwest? This seems to be more than just your usual classist prejudices." he retorted.

"Well maybe it is. I just don't want you to turn out all weird and loony tunes like Conrad Hilton or at least the version of Hilton they showed on Mad Men. You're already enough of a pain in the ass sometimes as it is, I don't need you to be even more so...like insisting we build a Bass Industries hotel on the moon or some such nonsense." she sarcastically replied.

"Hmm...a Bass Industries Hotel on the moon? What an interesting idea..." he mused.

"Chuck!" she moaned, rolling her eyes.

"Ha ha...I'm kidding, but still I wouldn't believe everything you see on a TV show, especially how real people are portrayed by actors nearly half a century later." he reassured her.

"Well that may be so, but I can still remember my Grandfather Waldorf going on about how back in the day, which was probably the 1960s, Conrad Hilton had stolen the Waldorf Astoria from our family through a business deal and turned it into a Hilton Hotel, which would forever link it to the cheesy motor inns throughout the Midwest. Despite his best efforts, Hilton would never live up to the grandiose splendor and class that is the Waldorf name and lineage." Blair haughtily declared.

"Ah Blair...well it's a wonder that you even married me, given that you pride yourself on class and family lineage and such, especially since I'm only a Bass." Chuck retorted a little gruff.

"Only? There's no 'only' about it, Chuck. I've investigated your family tree, and seen that despite whatever your father ever told you about starting from scratch as a young man, his grandfather was a brother to the Bass Family who were some of the co-contributors to Yale, so you come from a long line of wealth and privilege." she replied.

"True...but speaking of family, what about what we learned last year about my biological father being billionaire Winston Funk?" he asked.

"Minor detail, since Bart adopted you as an infant. Anyway looking into your mother's side of the family tree, I discovered that your Grandmother Alexis Carrington-Colby- et. al. is related to the Windsor Royal Family...which means you're related to royalty, Chuck...or should I call you Charles? Yes you're royal, my darling Charles, and that makes it even better! Ah yes I completely forgot that I'm related to royalty now...which is even more perfect since I've always wanted to be a princess...no better yet, a Queen!" Blair sighed.

"Ha ha yeah quite the princess...uh...queen you are darling...although I hope my royal connection wasn't the only reason why you agreed to marry me..." he sighed and laughed.

"Well of course not dear. Your reputation in business and in bed was more than enough of a reason to marry you." she teased.

"So you just married me for my billions and my cock?" he asked skeptically.

"Well as you say, you are Chuck Bass!" she teased.

"Very funny, Blair." he scowled as a little bit of anger flashed across his face, albeit briefly.

"I'm teasing Chuck...mmm...I married you because I love you. You have a wicked sense of humor and one of the few people who actually gets me. Plus you're a devilishly handsome basstard and I knew as soon as we'd had our first time together, I wasn't going to give this Bass up to anyone else..." she seductively whispered in his ear between nibbling kisses to the side of his jaw.

Chuck turned to her then, clutching her around the waist as she drew her hand along the side of his face and the back of his neck as they began to kiss in earnest, losing themselves for a moment on the piano bench. He began pushing her back onto the piano as their mouths caressed each other in a sensuous dance, biting and nibbling at each others lips and tongues, trying not to knock teeth as they kissed, when suddenly their son began pounding on the keyboard of the piano.

Trying to ignore Matthew, they playfully kept kissing, until Chuck felt something hit him on the head, which caused him to yelp "Ow what was that?" as he broke the kiss and the object fell into the piano with a soft thud as it hit some of the strings on the baby grand.

Suddenly their son started to cry and babble "Dada, Mama, my nuk nuk, uh uh..." as he pounded the keyboard.

"Nuk nuk? No son you can't have nuk nuk with your mama...but I can." Chuck seductively teased.

"No, Chuck he's talking about his fooler? He must've lost it..." Blair sighed as she pushed Chuck off of her.

"Fooler? I think this is all foolish..." Chuck grunted as sat up.

"No his pacifer, hun. He must've lost it somewhere." she sighed.

"Oh...well I think something did hit me on the head and fell into the piano a moment ago..." he replied.

"Really? Oh yeah there it is. Oh Matt why did you throw your nuk nuk at daddy Chuck and the piano? Bad boy! Now it's all the way at the bottom!" Blair cried as she reached into the piano to pull out the pacifier, but Chuck interrupted her saying "I'll get it..." as he reached into the piano and pulled it out, ready to hand it to the boy, until Blair interrupted him.

"Not so fast, Chuck! That thing was at the bottom of the piano and is no doubt covered in dust, I need to wash it first before you give it to our son!" Blair admonished him as she reached for the pacifier, but before she could grab it, their daughter started to cry from her baby swing, so Blair went for their daughter and told Chuck to wipe off the pacifier.

Smirking to his son, Chuck pulled out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped the pacifier off before he gave it to his son, saying "Here ya go, son. What your mum doesn't know won't hurt her, aye?" as he plugged the toddler's mouth with it.

They then took the children back upstairs to the nursery, to spend time with them there before the parents got ready for their night out together. Playing with the little ones was fun, but soon the children started getting a little bit sleepy and it was time to get ready themselves. Blair thought it was adorable how little Matthew just fell asleep on her husband's shoulder as he was being held, and that Chuck seemed to enjoy the moment too, giving their young son a little kiss on his hair before laying him in his crib. Afterwards they walked toward their son's new bedroom, which was almost finished decorating in its seaside jungle theme.

They inspected the room a bit, marveling at the excellent work the interior decorating team Blair had hired to create her design had done. The walls with their murals and the various decorating touches with the bed and stuffed animals were excellent and so they couldn't wait until they could move their son into his new room and then start working on their daughter's princess themed room. Blair already had plenty of ideas about how to decorate the room to maximize the effect of a full on princess's room. She even planned to include her own toy doll house from childhood, with the little princess mice dolls that she'd always included with the house.

After inspecting their son's bedroom, and sharing her ideas for their daughter's room, with her husband, Blair followed Chuck into their own room, where they took turns using the bathroom and getting ready for their evening out. They readied themselves in record time, and were soon on their way. Blair had no idea where Chuck was taking her, so she anticipated the surprise as she snuggled close to him in the car in an attempt to keep warm, as they rode in the limo through the snow.

Eventually they arrived at their destination, which was a surprise to Blair, since she'd been there only a few times. "Is this the Empire Hotel, Chuck? The one you bought?" she asked as he assisted her out of the car.

"Yes, here it is, darling. The Empire Hotel in all of its glory, such as it is. I thought I'd give you a grand tour of the place, before we sample some of the cuisine they have to offer in the hotel's restaurant. Show you what I purchased and see if it passes your thorough inspection, my dear." he mused as he led her into the hotel.

"Indeed. Well I'm glad you respect my opinion, as you should, in everything." she smugly replied.

Like a kid showing off his new toy, Chuck proudly led Blair around the hotel, to the most important rooms. Despite the holidays being over, the hotel was still decorated with lights, wreaths, and trees, which covered the various stairways, railings, and entrance ways. Blair looked beyond the decorations though and saw various parts of the hotel that were starting to look a little worn and dated, despite somebody's attempt to cover them with Christmas decorations.

Making mental note of that, she followed Chuck around a bit more, asking him "Darling, who was responsible for decorating the hotel?" as they walked into the restaurant.

Turning to her, he replied "It was already decorated like this when I bought the place. I guess the staff haven't removed the decorations yet, so that will be something that I'll be sure to inform the concierge that must be done."

"Hmm...just as I thought. Chuck, did you happen to see the condition of the woodwork, tiling, and carpets in some places under the Christmas decorations? I'm sorry to say this, but they're worn in spots, and those were the spots I could see peeking out from under the decorations. The Empire seems to be a grand hotel...but it's going to need some work before it is anything close to the Palace." she admitted.

"Really? Thank you for informing me, darling. I knew that the hotel would need some work, but I will have to have a more thorough inspection of the place to see if what you said was true." he replied brusquely as he helped her into her chair and they sat down to eat.

The meal was soon served, and the Veal Scallopini and Chicken Marsala they were served were decent, although their cooks at home could make better. The wine though was excellent, so they indulged in that, while Chuck shared his idea about what he planned to do with the pre-existing nightclub in the basement of the hotel. Chuck's ideas sounded good, even though she sensed that he might not be telling her everything. Chuck also seemed subdued somewhat after she'd mentioned to him about the state of the hotel that was hidden underneath the Christmas decorations.

Chuck had planned to have them spend the night at the hotel in a suite upstairs, but after hearing Blair's opinion of the hotel he began to worry about it and about her, since she seemed to be flagging a bit after her first night out on the town since she'd been ill. Out of concern for his wife, and worry over his new purchase, he decided to call it an early night, calling his driver to have the limo to be brought around so that they could head home.

On the ride home, Blair snuggled close to her husband, wanting to do more, but feeling a bit sleepy, so she just rested her head on his shoulder and started to nod off, even as she stroked his thigh. Chuck just put his arm around her and held her like that while they rode home. When they got home, he helped her out of the limo and into the house, leading her upstairs with the help of Dorota. Chuck even made sure she made it to the bathroom, where she took a shower. After she showered, dressed in pajamas, and blow dried her hair, Blair crawled into her bed and started to doze, while Chuck took his shower.

Blair was already almost asleep, while Chuck took his shower, so she didn't hear his grunts and groans as he tried to take care of himself as he morosely thought that his wife was probably too tired or still too sick to help him. He'd been able to subdue his sexual urges quite nicely more recently because of concerns over work and Blair being sick, but after taking her out and having her sleep with her hand gripping his thigh all the way home, he couldn't help what his body wanted to do. He was Chuck Bass. Feeling an odd sensation of guilt, worry, frustration, and his general horniness roiling around inside his gut, he pressed an index finger to his navel as he handled himself with his opposite hand and expelled his seed on the shower tiles, but that didn't help and only caused him to feel worse and a bit of guilt over making a mess in the shower because of what Blair would say the next morning. (She always claimed she could smell it if he'd taken care of himself in the shower the night before, and often she was right.)

Groaning as he finished his shower, quickly spraying the wall with a shower cleaner to hide the evidence of what he'd done by himself to himself (though it was only a natural function he'd done from time to time since he was twelve. Nothing to feel guilty about, he thought, even though he never assumed he'd continue once he had a girlfriend or wife) Chuck dressed in his favorite pajamas and crawled into bed beside his wife. Trying not to disturb her sleep, and still having a slight stomach ache himself, Chuck tried to fall asleep with his back to her, but was soon amusedly pleased when she spooned behind him and put her arm around him, smiling to himself as he started to drift off, knowing he was loved.

Blair was just starting to drift off to sleep in earnest, when she felt the other side of the bed move as Chuck slid into his side of their large bed. Sensing that something wasn't quite right from the way he lay facing away from her to fall asleep, Blair slid across the bed and spooned her body around his, slipping her hand around to rub his soft, warm belly, like she knew he often found comforting. Even though he'd attempted to tone up other parts of his body like his arms, shoulders, and upper chest, within the past year, she found comfort in the fact that he didn't have quite washboard abs and still had a unique, yet comfortable body. She cuddled close to him, wondering what was wrong and if he had a stomach ache again like he sometimes did, as she felt his stomach rumble a bit under her hands while she rubbed his belly. Doing that also reminded her of the times when he'd do the same to her while she was pregnant, spooning her from behind to feel for the baby's movements, and so Blair chuckled to herself as she spooned around Chuck, burying her nose at the back of neck behind his ear, breathing in his scent as she fell asleep.

The next morning, Blair was just starting to awake and was barely consciously aware that her husband had turned and had been holding her in her sleep, when she suddenly felt Chuck pull away from her and go padding quickly across the bedroom as he made his way to their bathroom, his bare feet making a scuff scuffing noise as he walked across the bathroom tiles. He groaned then while he sat on he toilet, loudly enough to draw her attention.

"Chuck are you okay in there?" she called from their bed.

"I just took a healthy shit...I think I lost thirty pounds!" he groaned.

"Oh that's nice to know... What do you want me to do alert the media? No even better, I'll just inform Gossip Girl! Spotted: Chuck Bass in his bathroom, taking a healthy shit and losing thirty pounds! I'm sure our alumni from Constance and St. Jude's would just love to receive that blast at 7:30 am on a Saturday!" Blair sarcastically teased from their bed.

"Nooo! You didn't just send that did you?" he groaned in protest.

"No...I'm not that cruel...though it would've been pretty funny." she replied.

"Good...because I'm siiick!" he moaned.

"Sick?" she gasped.

"I just dumped a load and it was pure diarrhea..." he moaned dramatically.

"What? Diarrhea? Gross, Chuck! Thanks so much for informing me of that.." she sarcastically replied.

"Aw Blair...its true! And now we're all going to get sick! I'm warning you!" he moaned dramatically.

"I hope not! Diarrhea is really what our children need right now!" she sarcastically replied, then added. "By the way what did you have last night for dinner?"

"I don't remember...uh...Veal Scallopini I guess..." he groaned in reply.

"Well maybe your diarrhea is from bad Veal Scallopini or something? Sometimes you do get 'sick' in ways we don't always catch from you, especially if its a stomach complaint." she replied.

"I do? I don't remember. Anyway what can I take for diarrhea?" he moaned.

"Well there are those Anti-Diarrheal pills I got to help you after you became travel sick once, and there's always a bottle of Pepto-Bismol in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom." she sighed.

"Uh...can you help me get it lover...I can't quite reach it from the toilet...ooohhh!" he moaned dramatically.

"Help you get it? You're not that much of a lazy ass are you, Bass?" she asked.

"Well if you want to clean my shit up off the floor, Blair, be my guest! Or maybe I'll have to tell Dorota to buy a package of adult diapers or something...and she can help me put them on..." he sarcastically replied.

"Chuck Bass, you've got to be kidding now! You don't need an adult diaper! I'll get you the Pepto-Bismol for you to take." Blair begrudgingly sighed as she rolled out of bed, donned her robe and made her way into the bathroom where she found the bottle of pink bismuth and a measuring cup, but when she started to hand the bottle to her husband, Chuck cried out.

"I'm rather dizzy...I don't think I can see straight enough to pour it myself right now." as he clutched his head and his stomach.

"Ooh you must be sick if you're too dizzy to pour pink bismuth into a plastic cup. Especially since I've seen you do ten shots in a row, including body shots off of some stripper you hired, without flinching a bit, at a party you held our Sophomore year, if I recall." she mused as she measured out his medicine.

"Well that was then and this is now. Now I'm sick and have you to take care of me because you're my wiiife." he moaned.

"Oh I guess you really meant it, when you vowed 'in sickness and in health.' Didn't I tell you I have three kids...with you being the biggest one of all sometimes? All right Chuckie, open up like a good boy so that Nurse Blair can give you your medicine." she laughed as she stood over him with the cup of liquid medicine, and brushed the front of his bed-head messed hair.

"Hmm...Nurse Blair? Maybe I should hold out until you put on your sexy nurse costume? I know that'd make me feel better." he slyly replied.

"Ah...well if you're feeling that good, then maybe I should just let you take this yourself?" she mused as she set it on a counter just out of his reach from the toilet, prompting him to moan "BLAIR..." clearly aggravated.

"All right hun...here we go...open wide.." she teased as she held the cup up to him and he downed it like a shot of whiskey.

"Blech! Uh...thank you though hun! I love you..." he sighed, giving her his most sympathetic look.

"And I love you too, drama king, Chuck. Ha ha...okay, once you get off the toilet, I want you to get some rest and I'll see that you get a diet of strictly toast and tea today. Nothing harsh for my poor man...and you luck out that today is Saturday, so I don't have to go back to work until Monday...lucky me." she sighed as she admonished him about getting bed rest.

"Ooh you're ordering me to bed? This day is getting better and better!" he mused.

"That's only because you have a stomach ache and diarrhea...otherwise you're helping me today." she replied.

"And what are you doing today?" he asked.

"Annual inventory of the household goods so that I know what we have and what needs to be replaced. Today I'm counting the silver in the kitchen with Dorota and Sissie, then hosting a tea this afternoon for the Junior League, since its my turn." she replied.

"Oh...I...uh...think I will stay in bed today, if you don't mind." he moaned as he suddenly acted more ill and Blair laughed at his attention grabbing theatrics and went on with starting her day.

~o~o~o~o~

The first several hours went fairly well, with helping to inventory the kitchen and especially the silver, making sure every piece was counted for, although Blair's part in it was mostly standing over Dorota and Sissie as they counted out all of the silverware and she tallied her results on her clipboard. In the meantime, she also made sure things were running smoothly for the ladies' tea and thus far they were.

At 12:45 pm, several of the ladies from the Junior League started to arrive at her home and Blair began greeting them cordially as she invited them in and insisted that they gather in the living room for the tea, which would be soon served. Within fifteen minutes all of her guests had arrived when Blair had just sat down to join her guests, and the conversation soon turned to herself. Usually self promotion was her favorite topic, however Blair soon realized these women were some of the same ones who'd given their opinions of her husband several years before.

"My my Blair, what a lovely home you've made for yourself, especially considering the family you married into. Is Bass Jr. as much of a cad as his late father, Bart Bass was?" one woman haughtily asked.

"Yes what is it like being married to Chuck Bass?" another woman asked.

"Well being Mrs. Charles Bartholomew Bass is certainly interesting at times..." she replied.

"Really? Well is he as good as he's rumored to be? My husband Walter can't last..." one woman asked as she went on to bemoan her middle aged sex life.

"My husband's good in that aspect. I'll just leave it at that." Blair replied smugly.

Some of the other women mused at that as they continued to discuss their husbands and families, until they got down to business discussing the various events and fundraisers the Junior League wanted to accomplish in the next year, including ones in which they partnered with Blair's clothing company to give their causes merit.

Blair was just about to give her opinion on one matter, when Dorota came around and said "Ms. Blair, Mister Chuck wants you to come help him."

"Tell Mister Chuck that I am busy and that whatever he needs you can help him with." she replied.

"Are you sure, Ms. Blair? Mister Chuck say it personal matter..." Dorota cautiously replied.

"What? Ergh! All right, I'll see what he wants..." Blair sighed to Dorota, then turned to her guests. "Excuse me for a moment, I need to see what my husband needs."

After excusing herself, Blair made her way to the staircase and climbed upstairs to her bedroom, hearing a bell ringing the entire time. When she walked into the room she saw Chuck sitting on the toilet ringing a cowbell and bellowing "BLAIR! BLAIR! Oh there you are!"

"Chuck Bass, I'm hosting the Junior League Ladies Tea right now downstairs and was going to ask you what you needed...but now I've got to ask, why are you sitting in the bathroom half naked? What happened to your pajamas? And where in the world did you get a cow bell?" she scolded him.

"You have guests, huh? I didn't notice...Anyway I shit myself when I didn't quite make it to the bathroom on time, and ruined my pajamas. They're on a heap on the floor over there. So now I need fresh pajamas and a clean underpants and I wanted you to choose them because you know what I like..." he admitted.

"You called me upstairs just to help you pick out your pajamas and underpants? Thanks for thinking I do such a great job picking them out, but you should've had Dorota help, since I was busy!" she admonished him.

"But I chose you!" he quipped.

"Indeed you did. Here you go, your underclothes and a fresh pajamas. Anyway why did you mess yourself? Its not that far between our bed and the bathroom." she asked.

"Well I had to go...then I thought I'd look for that cow bell I bought on a business trip to Switzerland...and by the time I found it...it was already too late...Thanks for the pajamas though, doll." he admitted, trying to be seductive, despite still being sick.

"You're welcome. Aw poor Chuck my love, you're still sick? Have you taken anymore Pepto-Bismol since the last time I gave it to you this morning?" she asked.

"No..." he moaned.

"Oh you should have! All right Chuck here you go...open wide like a good boy!" she teased as she gave him another dose of medicine, kissing him on the forehead after he gulped it down.

"Thanks hun, you always take such good care of me when I need it." he mused.

"You're welcome. All right hun, back to bed with you. You need to get your rest so that you can feel better again." she sighed as she wiped a glob of pink bismuth from the corner of his mouth with her thumb.

"Mmm...bed...so are you gonna join me?" he mused.

"No I can't...I have a party to host. I'll be back up to check on you when its finished, so be patient until then, my sexy patient." she teased.

"So you think I'm sexy? If you want my body, come on baby let me know..." he teased.

"Yes Rob Stewart! Ha ha very funny. Now get to bed Chuck or else you'll have to have to help me host the ladies tea and hear everyone's opinion of their husbands and the questions they asked me about you." she replied.

"Really? They asked about me? What did they ask about?" he inquired curiously.

"Oh if you were the great lover that you were rumored to be..." she replied.

"And what did you say?" he asked.

"I'll never tell..." she replied.

"What? Blair!" he moaned from bed.

"See you later, Chuck!" she retorted as she shut the bedroom door and made her way downstairs.

When she rejoined the party, one of the women asked her if her husband had needed her for some special help, to which she replied, "Well maybe it was that or maybe it wasn't, I won't say." bemusedly teasing them.

The conversation continued to flow amongst the women with topics varying from politics to women in business and how even in the 21st century, women were still having to pay more for things than men were. As the conversation went though, Blair kept being interrupted by requests from 'Mister Chuck' and his cow bell. First he couldn't find his socks, then he wanted a back rub, then he wanted his tea, then he lost the book he was reading, and his favorite scarf, and then he said the toilet was clogged, so on and so forth, until she just decided to ignore his requests as she took away his cow bell.

Finally when she got back to her guests, the one woman laughed. "My my Blair Waldorf-Bass, your husband certainly keeps you on a short leash! How many requests has it been in the last half hour? Five? Ten?"

"Chuck is usually not this bad. Far from it. He's just sick right now that's all." she sighed.

"And fighting for your attention just like most men do when they're ill. Well I hope you put him in his place for the time being. As I've always said children and sick husbands should he seen but not heard, at least during certain times..wouldn't you agree?" she chortled as the other women laughed in agreement and Blair was about to as well, when she suddenly heard the pattering of little feet.

Suddenly, much to her astonishment and horror, her toddler son Matthew came running out naked in all of his baby Bassian glory, laughingly running as his toy truck ran along behind him beeping "Hi I'm Chuck! Beep Beep!" When Matt saw his Blair he ran up to her and yelled "Mama!" and grabbed for her leg, but became distracted by another woman with a colorful dress, pausing in front of her and skeptically staring, until he yelled "Gamma?"

"Aw what an adorable, precocious little boy! Although do you usually leave him in such a state of undress? Talk about a lack of decorum! Why you can tell the poor lad is freezing! His toes are turning blue and just look at his little..." the woman gasped.

Suddenly Matt babbled something that sounded like "Me go pee pee!" as he stared down at the woman's Louboutin pumps, braced his feet apart, clenched his little Bass bottom, and proceeded to pee on her shoes, much to the horror of everyone.

"My word! Did that child just...just...urinate on me like a common dog? How uncouth! Where's this child's nanny?" the woman shrieked.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Wentworth! I apologize right now for my son and his atrocious manners. I'll be sure to find the nanny and give her a talking to. Come son, you naughty little boy! Bad boy, you don't pee pee on Mrs. Wentworth's Louboutin pumps!" Blair scolded her son as she picked him up and held his little body against hers, feeling how cold he actually was, as the boy looked over her shoulder and waved bye bye with his pacifier.

When she got upstairs, Blair became even more angry and upset when she couldn't find the nanny and all she did find was Tatum fussing in her crib needing to be changed and Chuck sitting on the toilet complaining "Blair the baby's crying and this is the upteenth time I've had to shit today! You're all gonna get sick, I'm just warning ya! Oohhh!" as he dramatically moaned.

Sighing to herself, Blair thought to herself 'Yeah THIS is what real marriage is sometimes. Crying babies, sick husbands who beg for your attention, and toddlers who interrupt your tea party by running through stark naked and peeing on your guest's designer Louboutins?! Ah what a life I have!'

"Well I'm sorry about that, but have you seen the children's nanny? Tate's crying in her bed needing changed and you won't believe how Matt interrupted my tea party downstairs!" she moaned.

"The nanny claimed she had an emergency about half an hour ago, so I gave her the rest of the day off. I was going to check on Tatum, but then I had to take a shit. Anyway how did Matt interrupt your tea party?" he asked.

"You gave the nanny the rest of the day off? That's generous! Anyway all I know is that your son Matt came running into the living room stark naked...and peed on Mrs. Wentworth's Louboutin pumps right in front of everyone! I was mortified to say the least!" she dramatically sighed.

"He did that? Ha ha ha ha!" Chuck laughed so hard it brought tears to his eyes.

"You might think it's funny Chuck Bass, but I thought it was terribly embarrassing! The way she reacted...I don't think I can show my face in polite society again! Although...okay maybe it was sort of funny, I must admit." she sighed and chuckled.

"It was! Mrs. Wentworth is a stuck up bitch and you know it. It serves her right if she gets brought down a peg once in awhile. Anyway where's my boy! Ah there you are son! Congratulations son on your first sneaky trick, like a true Bass man! Still though you need to protect the Bass family jewels or else the ladies will be fighting for you already! See he's already on his way to becoming a true Bass man...aren't you son?" Chuck teased as he glanced at his toddler son, a near carbon copy of himself in miniature, and gave him a kiss on the top of his head.

"Yeah he definitely is a chip off the ol' block, Chuck. He looks and acts just like you! He even pees standing up, just like you do, with his feet apart, slightly clenching his little Bass ass. Which means you get to take care of him, while I see to our daughter's needs." Blair declared as she walked back to the nursery.

"I do that when I take a piss? I never realized. Well its good to know you love watching me in everything I do, love!" he laughed.

Blair had just finished changing and diapering their daughter, making her smell sweet and clean like baby powder again, as she tickled the girl and teasingly saying "Are you fresh and clean my little Princess Tatie tot...yes you are! He he...aw..." when Chuck walked into the room looking slightly disheveled as he carried their son who was wrapped in a towel.

"Little Princess Tatie Tot? Interesting nickname, Blair...I didn't know our daughter was a processed baked potato nugget." Chuck mused as he sat his son in his crib.

"She isn't...its just a nickname. Anyway it's good too see you out of bed, dear, and not on the toilet. Are you feeling any better?" she asked as she finished taking care of her daughter, then went on. "Well she's dressed, so now on to your son. Where's his clothes?"

"Still in the drawers? I didn't get them out yet..." Chuck sighed as he leaned against his daughter's crib and glanced down at her.

"Didn't get them out? Oh Chuck!" she sighed.

"Anyway I am feeling better...sort of...but I'm still not a hundred percent." he sighed as he glanced down at his daughter. "Aw she is a cute little thing isn't she Blair? She looks like you! I can't believe we made her...made both of them actually." he mused.

"Yes even if she looks a lot like me, she's a Bass too, I can tell already. Just look at her jaw! But I agree, they're both adorable." Blair mused as she glanced towards her husband and their daughter.

"I agree. Hmm...so you're up here love...what happened to your tea party? It's too bad if we caused it to...break up." he asked.

"Well if it did, I am blaming you to some extent, but maybe that chapter of the Junior League just wasn't ready for Blair Waldorf-Bass yet? It seems like they just wanted to use my name to further their causes, which is just using me." she replied.

"Indeed. That's why it's a good thing you found out now. Hmm...I think I feel up for a snack, so maybe I'll accompany you downstairs with the children, if you don't mind." he replied.

"That's fine. All right Chuck, you carry our son and I'll carry our daughter, since you sent the nanny on her way for the day!" Blair sighed as she handed Matt to Chuck and picked up Tatum herself and they made their way downstairs.

Not to their surprise, Mrs. Wentworth and most of the other women had left, with the verbal intent to meet elsewhere, although preferably not at the Waldorf-Bass home. Still Mrs. Simms and Mrs. Jonas stayed a bit longer to apologize for the others' behavior and chatted a bit with the couple, until they too had to leave.

After they were gone, Chuck and Blair just relaxed as a family and tried to find humor in the crazy moments of their day. Eventually the topic turned to one in which Chuck mentioned something about how he was considering a purchase for the bedroom which would be a surprise. Blair couldn't guess what his surprise was, and knowing Chuck it could be anything, but even when they went to bed that evening, he said he'd keep it as a surprise for a few more days yet. Say that it was a late Christmas or early anniversary gift, so he'd keep her in suspense.