Chapter Fifty-Six
The Darkness and The Silence
Black hair. Like a starless night, like blotched ink falling from a broken quill, or a dementor or some other souless creature.
I'm not really a fan of this particular shade of black, in case you haven't noticed. Not on her at least, it's just too strange. And it's not just her hair - it's make-up and nails, clothes, shoes. She exudes black. She is too ... dark, too tortured. It hurts me to look at her, I can only imagine what it feels like to be her. It's not just dyed, but significantly shorter, too. Her once waist-length hair, now only reaches her shoulders, choppily. I would laugh at the cliche, if I didn't know just how much Dom had loved her hair, it's silver shine her most precious possession, her power. By cuttuing it off she is taking a stand, cutting herself off - from us, from Frank, and Rosie of course.
The whole room is silent. When we called this meeting we didn't really expect her to come. But, being her, of course she had to make an entrance. The door was pushed open with a great bang, slamming against the walls obnoxiously and chipping the scarlet paint. Everyone looks up at once and there she stands, hands on hip, careless smirk and black, black hair. She is a shadow. However, depite being the centre of attention, she just doesn't seem happy.
"Oh, Dom." I sigh, under my breath. She is flaunting a mask of total indifference, looking us all up and down. I can just tell she is about to be a bitch, she had bitch face, ... but I'm too worried about her to care. I brace myself for whatever cruelty is about to come.
"Shit, Dom. What have you done to your hair? Mama will kill you!" Exclaims Louis, pulling his chair back and standing. He isn't wearing the sympathetic look yet, he doesn't know- Rose didn't have a chance to get it out before Dom walked in.
We are the only ones that know - Rose, Roxie and I - and everyone else looks bewildered. They can sense something is wrong, but not what or why - Dom has been genuinely happy recently. She has exuded light, changed totally. But now the radient smile is gone and been replaced by a girl who couldn't reognise happy if it bit her on the arse. She was better off before this, I find myself thinking. Not just before last night, but before any of it. Frank, and a relationship, and fighting with Rosie. I'm not exactly sure what Dom has been through this year, but whatever it is, she has been undoubtedly, colossally, changed - and I'm not sure for the better. Sure, she was loose and flighty, but if she was happy with that who were we to judge. A sudden anger washes through me, and I'm not sure who to blame. Frank? He is the one who pushed her to be someone she's not, the one who convinced her to believe in romance again and then betrayed her. Just because he couldn't get over his own feelings. Yeah, I'll stick with Frank - it's easier than blaming my own family, and far easier than blaming nobody at all.
"Ah, I can tell by the looks on your faces that she hasn't told you yet. Of course not - who needs honesty Rose, huh? Or family loyalty?" She hisses, hand on hip, glaring openly at Rose. I guess she is not confused over who to blame. Rosie slowly stands, her hands twitching slightly, as if they want to reach out to our cousin. But they don't, and that's probably the right choice. I don't know what Dom will do, but at this moment she just isn't stable. She could hurt somebody, if this plays out wrong.
The whole room is filled with a sudden tension at the ice in her honey voice. Even without knowing the facts, there is a mass wave of understanding, a palpable sadness, and everyone can feel what's coming, though they know nothing at all. That something, will be big.
"Dominique, please don't do this. I was just about-" Dom interupts Rose without even sparing her a glance.
"Not really words in your dictionary, are they babe? Never mind then, little cousin, I'll tell everyone for you." She spits scathingly, her plastered smile turning to a vicious sneer.
"Dom, I'm begging y-"
"Our goody-goody, ass-kissing, teacher's-dream cousin ... has turned out to be a fucking slag, isn't that right Princess?" She spits venomously, and continues without waiting for any kind of reponse. The room is filled with furrowed brows and confusion filled eyes. A sea of silent anxiety, all staring at our cousin until the point is made. Except of course, myself who sits with an emotionless look on my face that I have perfected with time, Roxie who bites her lip and burrows a hole into the wood with a stare, and Rose herself, who is crying silently. Hugo tentatively puts an arm around her shoulders from his seat beside her but continues looking at Dom. " Last night Slaggy Rose decided, after shagging her own boyfriend, she would take mine out for a test ride. On Valentine's of all nights. She slept with Frank. So thus forth, or whatever, I have decided that we are no longer cousins, She and I. We are done. In fact, I'm going back to how things used to be - just minus one judgy, boyfriend-fucking cousin - and so if anyone of you have a problem with that, you can all go to hell. We can all be done. Not that I have a problem with any of you. Just her. Comprendre, mes cheris?"
There is a horrible quiet in this room, normally so filled with noise. Everyone looks around - at each other, at the wall, at Dom and at Rose. The looks are of confusion, understanding, accusing, piteous. Each different just like the people to whom they belong. One thing they have in common though - each look is paired with silence. But Dom continues her vicious verbal assault.
"I just thought you would want to know what a sad, pathetic little whore she turned out to be. A miserable, desperate slut." She finally turns to Rose, begins walking towards her slowly, spitting her words as hard as she can." At least I didn't hold myslef out on some - some high-and-mighty virginal pedestal. I never pretended to be the good girl, the saint - I might be easy, Rose Weasley, but I would never do what you did, you vicious, two-bit skanky wh-"
"That's ENOUGH Dominique." Booms Hugo, standing up. He moves in front of the crying Rose and crosses his arms. He looks older somehow - he looks almost six feet tall. I feel older too. When did that happen? "Look, I don't know what the full story is, and I don't really care. I'm sorry that you're upset Dominique, and you obviously have some stuff that you need to work through, I mean, Merlin Dom-" He gestures vaguely to her hair and face. "-But nobody talks to my sister that way, and I mean nobody. Especially not you, not after all that she has done for you-"
"All She's done for her?" Interupts Louis, moving to stand in front of his sister. Oh no. This cannot be good. " I don't want to cause anything, Hugh, but it looks to me like this problem is obvious. Fair enough, some of the name-calling seems ... harsh... but Dom has a right to be mad. Seems to me that the only thing Rose has done for my sister is slept with her boyfriend and broken her heart, I mean look at her. That's what her actions have done." His tone is pleasant, placating, but his stance is protective. Louis, usually so tame and peaceful, is doing everything but shout and glare at our cousins. Making his place in this, his choice, absolutely clear. The family are starting to become uncomfortable, to shuffle and shift in their chairs. A few coughs clear the awkward silence until Hugo seems to have pulled himself together. Barely.
"As a matter of fact, Mate, I was referring to all the times Rose has saved your sister's bacon. Gotten her out of Merlin Knows how many scraps. How many times has Rose dragged Dom away from a fight she just wouldn't win? Or stuck up for her when people have called her names in the halls, or helped her out when the guys she humped and dumped just couldn't let go? Or -wait, here's my favourite- how many times has she taken Dom's side, even after Dom herself has kissed another girl's boyfriend in some closet or another? I mean, for Fuck's Sake, Hypocrite much?"
"I guess we know who's slaggy-side you're sticking by Hugo!" Interjects Dom, scoffing and rolling her eyes. "I'm not saying I'm such a fabulous fucking gal, but I would never have done what she did - and that's what makes me better!"
"In what world, Dom?! In what world are you better than me?!" Screechs Rose wetly, tears streaming relentlessly, moving to stand beside Hugo. "I made one mistake - just one! You have made hundreds. And the only reason Frank slept with me is because you were a bad girlfriend. He told me. He told me that he wanted to be with you - seriously, like forever - and you ran away, the same scared little commitment-phobe you always are. You rejected him-"
"-Merlin's Balls, I didn't reject him, Rose, I needed time to think. You try having someone tell you they plan on spending a lifetime with you - at 17 years old- and not needing time to catch your breath. I was gone one night - like 7 hours - and I came back to find he had already moved on. With you - my supposed friend. I was- I was coming back." Her black lashes become covered in speckles of tears, but to my surprise no marks are left down her cheeks. The only difference is how prominent they have become, the darkness standing out against her flushed ivory skin and making her tears all the more sad. I don't know what I was expecting her side to be, but this wasn't it. Damn it, Frank!
"Yeah, maybe. But you did reject him Dominique, the same way Scorp rejected me. I know what he was feeling, I could relate. And we were sad and lonely and drunk - I'm not saying what we did was right, but it's forgivible! Understandable! For all we knew, at that moment in time we were single. How were we- how was he supposed to know you were coming back Dom, when running is all you do?"
She has no response for that. Both girls take a moment to wipe their floods of tears, straighten their clothes, pat their flushed faces and regain their dignity, or what little they feel they have. Both boys frown, and rub their sisters backs, and unclench their fists. The rest of us take a moment to look at each other. I try to search Roxie's eyes, since we are both on the same not-surprised page, but she and Fred are exchanging whispers. I look at Al briefly, his eyes seem far away, though he nods at me, then I look to James. I don't know why, but he's just always been in charge, for me at least. I expect him to stand up, to break the silence, to fix it all for me, but he doesn't. I can see in his eyes that he knows he should, he opens his mouth as if to say something calming and wonderful - but he stops himself. He looks right at me, shrugs slightly, and slouches back into his chair with a sigh only I can see. He has removed himself from the situation - I can't blame him.
Dominique takes a step back and fixes her face - haughty and indignant and carefree at the same time.
"I don't care what any of you think - especially you Rose. I've said my piece, I know I'm in the right. So I'm going to leave now. And maybe I'll tell everyone what you did, or just a few people, or nobody at all. Maybe I'll tell your parents or mine-"
"Dom, you wouldn't!" Gasps Hugo.
"-or maybe I'll do nothing at all. Let you stew, wonder. Whatever. That's how easy it is to make decisions when you just don't care about the consequences. When there are none. Nothing anyone can say will hurt me - I've stopped making roots. I've dug them up. I'm free-er than ever. I'm going now. Have a nice life, Princess." She grins, turns on her skyscraper heels and flounces out.
"Dom? Dom - wait up." Calls Louis, reluctantly looking around the room at all of us before running out after his shell of a sister. Guess, he's made his choice too.
Nobody talks before standing up and trailing out of the room in little clumps. I wait by the door for James. He looks as if he wants to walk past me, but thinks better of it and approaches me.
"What?" He says, softly but bluntly.
"What do you mean 'what'? What are we going to do? How do we fix it?" I ask urgently. He just sighs.
"Lily... I. Look, you have no idea how much I want to help. Everyone, all of you, all the time - I feel like it's my job. And it's great that over these last few months you've started to come into your own and - and get involved. So I know you feel responsibility too. But the truth is Lil, it's not our job to make up for them. I think that's why they've gotten where they are. They fell out earlier this year, and a few of us ... we've been pushing them together - we didn't let them get it back on their own, and it blew up in our faces. And theirs. So this time, we have to let them fix it by themselves, they are the one's who've made the mistakes - big, serious mistakes - and even if I should, I wouldn't know how to make that better. If we ever want them to be friends again - proper, real friends, not just cousins - then ... we just have to be patient. I'm sorry, Lily. I know- I know you think I'm in charge Lil, that I should lead or something, but - but I just can't. Just ... let them be."
SO. Hi. There's no excuse for how long it has been since I updated. No serious life problems, nothing to do with health or grief. So I am sorry. I really will try to be more regular with my updates from now on - I have not forgotten my stories - and I am grateful to anyone wh has stuck by, and will still read this story despite how terrible I am at sticking to my promises.
On a lighter note, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I'm sorry for any and all typos - I was just so eager to get it uploaded that I did not proof read as well as I should have.
If it's not too much to ask, please read and review - your comments really do motivate me more than anything.
Thank you, and apologies again - apologies infinity.
