A/n hey guys my muse turned to the dark side for this chapter. It my first attempt at something so dark and moody so any feedback is appreciated. Thank you all for your support of this group of vignettes and your great feedback. Thanks again to my wonderful beta REIDFANATIC for her help and encouragement.

Disclaimer: My muse thinks she owns them but she doesn't and neither do I.

Love is Blind

The door slams shut with a bang. There's pounding on the wall but you ignore it. It doesn't matter what the neighbors think. They don't understand you anyway. You're just someone they barely know or even notice. No, they don't know you at all. No one has ever bothered to get to know you, and why should they. You make it clear that you don't want friends among them. They think you're strange. They wonder about your personal life. They never see you with any company. There are rumors about you because of your age and lack of lovers. They've never seen you with anyone, but they don't know everything about you.

There is one love in your life. They've never met your love, no one has. It's easy to hide this love away from everyone. You thought it would be hard to hide the one you truly long for and desire with all of your heart, but the funny thing is that they're blind. They are totally, completely blind to the one true all encompassing love in your life.

You cross the living room slipping off the clothes you've worn for two days on a case that has kept you away for too long. You need what's here in this place, hidden in your space where none of them ever enter. You like it that way. What is there for them to see anyway? They would only laugh at you if they saw what you've become.

You're naked and trembling so badly you can hardly open the medicine cabinet, yet there it is open before you. You ignore the haunted and desperate look in your own eyes as you pull the small bottle from the cabinet and shut it with another tiny slam. The glass shakes and you wonder for a crazy second if it won't fall and shatter in the sink, and then you'll see your soul for what it is, shattered in one hundred pieces.

The needle is in its proper place in a drawer under the sink. It's been too long, and the need is like a huge caged animal in your chest that is roaring to get out, and rip off the head of the next person to cross your path if it will bring the sweet pleasure of your only passion.

You have no patience left to deal with a tourniquet or finding a vein, so you sit shaking on the closed lid of the toilet and lift your leg to inject between your toes. Yes… the needle is silver and shining in the yellow light of the bathroom light. It begs you to slide it into your flesh. It wants to bite into you as a lover would bite your neck, or shoulder, or your privates and leave a mark there. It's only a pin prick of pain, and then the sensations of the one you love making itself one with your body.

Isn't that what a lover does, become one with you in flesh and spirit. There is nothing now but a numbness that falls over the body and the sensation of floating. You don't see your poor cursed mother anymore, another has taken her place. There is someone else in your dreams that you can't have in the true light of day, someone that would hate you if she knew what you were doing to yourself. She'll never love you the way you want, but the drug will always love you. The needle falls from your hand and your breathing becomes labored, but you barely notice that this time there was too much in the syringe. You don't care because you are with her. She is there, stroking your hair the way you like, telling you how much she loves you and how you'll always be together. She promises you forever, but you know even in the haze of this high that she is a liar.

You're so very dizzy now and you slide off the toilet to the tile floor, banging your knees hard on the cold hard floor. You don't feel the pain in your head where it hit the edge of the bathtub, nor see the blood that begins to flow from the cut. It's only more red that you add to all that your eyes have to witness. Tobias was right, you're weak. You're too weak now to scream for help, it's too late. You went too far, the lover you cherish is pulling you down to a place you'll never leave, someplace dark and cold, and devoid of any feeling but unrelenting sadness and pain. Darkness is beginning to creep into the edges of your vision and you're so cold.

Then a voice pulls at you, commanding you to come back. There is something in that voice that you begin to cling to. It sounds like something you've never experienced before that very minute. The drug can't sound like that, or make you shiver with the need to hear it again. There it is again. The voice is angry, but it is also gentle and soothing at the same time, however impossible that can be. The voice calls out to you again and there is a second voice, this one isn't familiar. How long have you been like this, lying on the cold tile floor? The voice keeps talking to you and the voice is telling you to hang on, that they will help you. The voice apologizes for blindness. The voice isn't blind; it's you that's been blind to everyone and their worry for you. The dark grey and black at your vision is retreating. You feel hands on you, and someone puts something on your face and there is oxygen, blessed air in your lungs.

The owner of the voice enters your line of vision and in the yellow light she is beautiful, she is the one you truly love. She tells you it's not too late. She tells you it can't be too late because she needs her chance to kick your ass for scaring the hell out of her.

"I love you." you tell her, as tears begin to fall from your half open eyes. Your voice is so weak you can barely speak, but she smiles and it is the smile of angel. She is your angel, your beautiful crying angel there to bring you back from the brink.

"I love you too Spencer Reid."

A/n so there it is, again feedback is appreciated, flames will warm my hands and feet!