A/N: This story just came to me about an hour ago. I hurried it down so I wouldn't forget it. Don't mind the dirty intention behind this story, I've been reading a lot of doujinshi lately. If you don't know what doujinshi is, Google it. I've never seen anything hotter than Naruto and Sasuke going at it in manga form. ;) Yes, I am a naughty little fan girl. lol.


One-Shot #55
Boring Meetings

The meeting was boring. It was, in fact, the most boring thing that was ever invented. Ever since he and Sasuke became Jounin, the only things they have are meetings. Not missions, meetings.

And it bores Naruto to no end.

The seven letter word became the most evil curse there was. Every time that cruel word slid off Sasuke's tongue; Naruto would imagine a kunai stabbing him in the jugular. Very graphic. M-e-e-t-i-n-g. Was there a word more evil than that?

This particular meeting was about Konoha's allies and politics. Somewhere in the back of the blonde's head, he knew he should care, should pay attention. Hokage's needed to know these things. If he ever expected to be Hokage someday, he needed to stay alert, pay attention, and take everything in like a sponge. But it was just so boring!

Across the room he saw Sasuke sitting there, pretending to be the perfect shinobi. Naruto knew better, however. The corners of Sasuke's eyes were turned down, like he was annoyed. Years of sensing flickering emotions in that stoic boys face taught Naruto how to read him, almost like a book. Sasuke was bored, and Naruto smirked. At least he wasn't the only one. Had the hyperactive blonde cared to notice anyone else in the room, he would have seen they were all bored. But the only thing he watched was Sasuke and the way the perfect postured priss was slowly loosing his cool, his perfect shinobi poise.

Settling back in his chair, he began to daydream, something the teen had become rather good at over the years. His mind skipped from him eating ramen that morning to the afternoon sparring he and Sasuke had to learning Sasuke bought a new cell phone. At that though, he sat upright in his chair causing the ninja beside him to throw a strange look his way.

That cell phone was special, he remembered Sasuke saying. Something about all the new features it had or something. Truth being, Naruto didn't really pay attention past Sasuke saying it had games and music on it. He vaguely remembered Sakura asking about the ring tones and finding out it had a very aggressive vibrate setting. A setting Naruto picked on Sasuke about for quite a while.

That cell's really slim, 'suke. Think of all the places you could put that cell phone. That vibrate would really come in handy.

He wiggled his eyebrow suggestively and got slapped across the head.

Perverted baka!

Naruto silently slid his own cell phone out of his pocket, a little present from Iruka the previous year, and dialed Sasuke's number. If he knew Sasuke, and he did, that ice princess would have his phone set to vibrate. He wouldn't want to interrupt the meeting, would he?

As the call connected, Sasuke jumped a little. He reached into his pocket and stopped the vibration. Naruto ended that call and immediately started a new one. Sasuke jumped again, a slight blush forming on his cheeks, and stopped the vibration again. Naruto kept up the cycle until Sasuke finally looked at the caller ID. The display read Dobe.

Sasuke's head shot in Naruto's direction as his onyx eyes glared intensely at the blonde, who simply shot him a confused look and focused his attention back to Tsunade. He kept the smirk threatening to grace his face to himself the best he could. Next to his side, he redialed the number and made Sasuke jump again. Shooting him another glare, Sasuke held the phone in his hands which were placed on his lap.

Naruto watched as Sasuke's poise faltered slightly with each ring, he began retracing the phone's steps. First it was buried in his pocket, which since he's sitting down made the phone lying on his thigh. Sasuke is now holding it limply in his hands, which is on his lap. Tilting his head slightly, he realized the stoic teen moved the phone closer to his crotch.

Smirking, Naruto dialed the number again. This time Sasuke nearly jumped out of his seat as the phone vibrated a very sensitive area. Snickering at the older teens flushed and embarrassed face, Naruto began typing in a text message to his friend. He smiled to himself as he hit send, not realizing the text message tone would be a vibration also.

At the same time, Tsunade asked Sasuke to pass back a handout of something Naruto wasn't really interested in. As Sasuke sat the phone in his lap to hand the stack of papers behind him, Naruto's text message hit his phone. The vibration started and the phone was sitting directly on Sasuke's crotch, no hand in the way. The Uchiha jumped up, the phone falling on the floor. He rounded on the blonde, who was a good five seats away from him, and slapped him across the back of the head.

"Knock it off, idiot!" Sasuke's cheeks were flushed and his voice was wavering.

"What the hell is your problem, bastard?" Naruto stood up, rubbing the tender spot on the back of his head. "I've behaved through this entire meeting!"

"Bullshit!" Sasuke yelled. "You've been trying to get a reaction out of me! That damn vibrator is driving me insane!"

As that sentence left Sasuke's mouth, the entire room raised a collected eyebrow. Kakashi, who was standing against the wall the entire time, and watching the scene play out, snickered to himself.

"That…that's not what I meant…" Sasuke stuttered, looking around at the respected jounin gathered together.

"Sure it wasn't, Sasuke." Naruto smirked, slowly inching toward the door. "If you want a vibrator, I'm sure Sakura-chan can tell you where to buy one. I heard they make them in all different sizes and colors."

The intense death glare Naruto received would have made a lesser man burst into flames. It just made Uzumaki run, run as fast as his legs would carry him.

He didn't want to think what would happen to him if Sasuke caught him. He did, however, want to have the pleasure of picking on Sasuke about the bulge at the front of his pants and the fact that his new cell phone gave it to him.


Heh...Sasuke said "Vibrator" instead of "Vibration". Not that one would have been innocent, mind you.