Hey, people! Hope you're having a great weekend! Here's another chapter for you guy and maybe I'll write more this week, if not, expect a new chapter on Friday.

I do not own Kuroshitsuji or any of its (awesome) characters, but I do own my OC.

Typos everywhere! All that I mess up! Celebrate the typos! Before your eyes! In the city of light, they all come together! Ciel won't last forever! I'll miss him my whole life! (props to the people who actually know where the original song is from)


XxX

Chapter 52

'So you've never been on an airplane before?'

'Nope,' I answered. 'And certainly not in a private jet. Seriously, why do you have such a thing?'

Ciel looked away, out of the window. 'It's convenient.'

I rolled my eyes. 'Of course it is. I bet you use it all the time.'

Ciel sighed. 'Sebastian, please give Clarissa something else to do. I don't want her on my back for the whole trip.'

Sebastian got out of his seat and walked to the back of the room, where apparently the entertainment resided. 'How long will it take, anyway?' I asked as I turned back to look at Ciel. In this jet we were sitting across one another and we both had way too much space. Sebastian sat in the seat next to me, but we were separated by the path between the chairs. I wasn't sure yet if I was happy about that or not.

'About an hour. Maybe more,' Ciel checked his watch. 'It doesn't really matter. Sebastian has already booked a hotel and if I'm correct, Her Majesty will arrive tomorrow morning. So we have time.' Then he turned to me. 'Want to go and blow up the Eifel Tower?'

I wasn't sure if he was joking or not. 'I'd rather… not,' I said in all honesty. 'But I would love to see it.'

Ciel made a waving gesture with his hand. 'Don't bother. It's overrated. And ugly.'

'Oh, well, then let's visit the Notre Dame. Or the Scare Coeur!' I wasn't sure if I had to right to request anything, but I was too happy that I got to left the country to care.

Ciel made a face as if he smelled something really bad. 'Churches. Something Sebastian's not quite fond of. And neither am I, to be honest.'

I rolled my eyes. 'Great. You guys are so great. So what are we going to do in Paris? Sit in our room and play chess?'

'Exactly,' Ciel agreed, ignoring the clear sarcasm I had in my voice when I said that.

I moaned. 'Go to hell.'

Then I realised that that was one of the most inappropriate things I could've said. Ciel looked at me with a cool expression for about three seconds. Then he looked away and said: 'Don't worry, I will soon enough.'

And I was out of my chair, ignoring the fact that we were flying as I knelt before him and hugged him. 'I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry,' I whispered as I tried to comfort him.

I felt that he put his hands on my shoulder, but he didn't push me away. I was happy about that, but also a bit confused. I still didn't know what was going on in Ciel's head. What was that guy thinking?

And then I opened my eyes and looked over Ciel's shoulder to Sebastian, who looked like he just realised that he lost his favourite cat. It was a heart-breaking expression to see, but with Ciel in my arms and the knowledge of who – and what – Sebastian was, I didn't care. I just closed my eyes again and pretended I never saw that.

But at the same time I was sure that picture of Sebastian standing there with that hopeless expression would haunt my nightmares for as long as I lived.


XxX

I should've known that Ciel would want to sleep in a fancy hotel. But a freaky fancy thing that looked more like a palace than a hotel? I hadn't expected that. At all. I mean… I would've dressed a bit nicer if I had known.

'Hotel Balzac' was the name of the hotel. Never heard of it. But it sure as hell looked fancy. And even though I didn't know any French, Ciel and Sebastian spoke it flawlessly as they arranged the room. Then I heard the words 'royal suite' somewhere in their sentence and froze. Oh my freaking God. How rich could Ciel be? He owned a toy company! How rich could you become from selling toys?!

'Are you coming, Clarissa?' Ciel asked as a servant of the hotel took over my suitcase. He pointed at the elevator.

'Y-yes!' I said, way too impressed. I ran after him and we went into the elevator alone. I wasn't sure why Sebastian wasn't coming with us, but I was sure he had a good reason not to. Or maybe Ciel just wanted to be alone with me. Dammit! I really should just ask him!

'Let me guess,' Ciel said slowly as the elevator went up. 'You've never slept in a hotel before?'

I shook my head. 'Nope, I haven't. And even if I had I wouldn't have been prepared for this. This is so fancy!'

'Yes, of course it is,' Ciel said. 'I'm accustomed to luxury.'

'How can you even pay for all this?' I asked amazed.

Ciel shrugged. 'I'm an earl and I own a company.' Then he frowned. 'And it's not like I have to save money for later. Since this is most likely my last case, I would like to spend it in luxury.'

I frowned too and we were both silent as the elevator went up and up.


XxX

'Oh my—I can see the Eifel Tower from here!' I screamed as I ran towards the balcony and jumped through the room. The room I was currently in was the sort of living room area of the royal suite, but there was also a massive bedroom and a way too fancy bathroom. I wish I could live in this place.

'Of course you can,' Ciel said, as if that was a silly thing to say. Then he said: 'You'll be sleeping on the couch, if you don't mind. Even though we've shared a bed before, I rather not today.' He sounded sincere.

I didn't mind. Of course I didn't. The couch was almost as gigantic as the bed. 'Of course I don't mind! You paid for this, I sure didn't!' I said, still looking at the Eifel Tower. It was evening now and the lights on the Eifel Tower glowed. It was magical. 'Too bad we didn't come a few days earlier. We could go to Disneyland!' I added when Ciel didn't say anything.

'Disney. Competition,' Ciel told me. 'I'd rather you go to Fantom Land.'

'Is there a Fantom Land in Paris?' I asked him, turning around while frowning.

Ciel looked slightly confused. 'No,' he answered slowly.

'Exactly,' I said grinning, turning around to see the city of light again. This was so magical. This really did feel like a dream. 'By the way,' I said after a few more minutes of looking at the city. 'Where's Sebastian?'

Ciel didn't answer, but he came to stand beside me. After a while he opened his mouth. 'Sebastian is finding out in which hotel the Queen is going to sleep and how high the security will be. He is also arranging a ticket for you, so you can return to London safely after this is over.'

I felt that my eyes teared up again. 'Where am I supposed to go? If you're gone, I have nothing left. I could just get a job at Disneyland and work there for the rest of my life.'

'Well, they do have accommodation options for their employees there,' was Ciel's only reaction. 'Maybe it would be good for you. I doubt you can still make the year after all the lessons you've missed and I don't think you would be able to pay University. So maybe you should.'

'Ciel!' I screamed frustrated. 'How can you be so calm about this?'

'Because,' he said slowly, 'it won't help me to be angry. Or sad. Or scared. I will still die, no matter how I handle it. Stop criticizing me, Clarissa. You're not my mother.'

Ouch. I knew exactly where that came from. I did always treat him like a child, like a little brother. I turned my head to look at him and I saw that he wasn't looking at me. He was looking out of the window, but it seems like he was seeing nothing. 'I'm sorry Ciel, but I never once thought of you as my son.'

He slowly turned to face me and the expression in his eyes was one that I was able to read. Sebastian something looked at me like that, but Drossel was the one who would always look at me like that. Desire.

'Ciel,' I then said and I sounded so apologetic that it made me cringe. 'You are the closest friend I have. Hell, you're probably the only friend I have. And you're all I have left. And I would do anything to save you.'

He turned around and walked away, stamping with his feet like an angry kid. 'What good will that do you? I choose this path, Clarissa. Having you save me is like losing the game. And my honour. I won't be saved. I don't need saving.'

I knew that I was pulling an ugly face. The kind of face kids make when they wanted to convince their parents that they didn't break their expensive antique vase. 'But if I could save you, would you—'

'If you 'save' me,' Ciel said the word like it was a bad thing and like it wasn't the right word to use. 'I will never forgive you.' After he said that he marched out of the room and left me alone with the fancy furniture and expensive looking decoration.


XxX

Ciel didn't speak with me anymore. He had dinner without me and went to bed without telling me.

I sat on the couch and stared at the floor, not knowing what to do. I had meant every single word I'd said. And I knew that Ciel wouldn't forgive me if I saved him. But I wanted to save him. So much that it hurt.

'Good evening, my lady,' the demon said as he slowly walked into the room.

I moaned. 'Not now, Sebastian. I do not have the patience to deal with you today.'

'That's fine by me,' he said, sitting down beside me. 'I like you better when you're angry, after all.'

I laughed at that, but it sounded cynical and was quite short. I looked away from Sebastian and stared back at the floor again. 'Sebastian, about what I am—'

He interrupted me. 'I'm sorry, but I won't talk to you about that all too much. I promise I will if you still want to talk to me after I've finished my contract with my young master, but until then, I want to keep my knowledge away from you as much as possible.'

I sighed. I should've known. Of course he didn't want me to become an even bigger threat than I already was.

I felt how Sebastian put the hair that fell into my face behind my ear and then entangled his hand in my hair, but I didn't look. 'Clarissa, I understand that it's hard for you, but you need to understand—'

I knew what he was going to say and it angered me, so I grabbed his wrist so hard that I should at least hurt him a little and said between my clenched teeth: 'Don't you dare say anything about Ciel and his faith. It's your fault. Don't make killing you more tempting than it already is.' Then I pulled his hand away from my hair and put it down.

I saw how surprised Sebastian looked at his hand, as if he never thought I would do that. 'Remarkable,' was the only reaction I got from him.

I crossed my arms. 'Anything else?' I asked him.

'Yes,' he admitted. 'I happened to hear your conversation about Disneyland and I… wanted to show you something.' He shot up from the chair and offered me my hand.

'It's almost midnight, Disneyland is closed by now,' I told him, because even I knew that.

He just smiled innocently. Not trustworthy at all. 'I know. But please, just this once, trust me.'

I tilted my head to the side and observed him, the hand he held out to me and the possibility that I might die. If only Will had learned me more tricks. If only I wasn't so naïve and stupid. I took his hand and he lifted me off the couch, out his arms around me and I hooked my hands around his neck so that I wouldn't fall. 'What are you doing?' I asked as I realised he was carrying me like a princess.

'I'm showing you the benefits of being an immortal, supernatural being,' he told me and then he brought me to the balcony, opened the door and spread his wings to fly into the night.

My grip around his neck tightened as I realised that we were actually flying and as a response, his arms around me tightened as well. 'P-p-people are going to s-see us!' I told him, slightly terrified.

'Humans are stupid. They do not see anything,' Sebastian assured me. 'Though I will stay away from the Eifel Tower, if you don't mind.'

I just nodded against his chest and shivered as I felt the cold wind of the night, which made Sebastian look down on me. 'You are half angel, half reaper, Clarissa. You shouldn't feel cold. Cold doesn't bother does who stand above nature.'

I looked at him confused, but then realised that he wasn't looking at where he was flying. 'Watch where you're going, idiot!' I screamed.

Sebastian chuckled. 'Even though you're so special, you're still so human. You believe this wind is cold, so you find it cold. Understand what I'm saying?'

'Nop—' I stopped during that one word when I saw a pink castle in the distance. 'Oh my god! Is that—'

'No, it's not,' Sebastian said cynical. 'Of course it is!'

I felt a smile appearing on my face as I saw the attractions and decorations. Even though most of the lights were off and there wasn't much to see, it was wonderful to at least see it once. I looked up at the demon. 'Thank you.'

'You're welcome,' he told me. 'I believed you deserved some kind of distraction, with everything that has been going on.'

I tightened my grip around his shoulders even more. 'Thank you,' I said again and I felt how my emotions got to me. I knew I loved this demon, there was no point in denying it now, but I never felt it as much as I felt it right now. And I felt the desire to kiss him more than ever. But I didn't want to fall down nor crash into a building, so I didn't do anything.

But what I was feeling must have been easy to see for Sebastian, because after one look he landed on the top of one of the man building around Disney and looked at me with a looked that I'd seen before. I always looked at me like that right before he kissed me. Slightly amused, with a hint of an emotions that I couldn't understand. 'For someone who has said that she didn't want to do this sort of thing, anymore, you sure seem willing,' he said as he leaned his head down to kiss me as if this was his last chance. Even though his words had sound teasingly, his kiss felt desperate, almost sad. And it felt as if I could feel his emotions through our connection and I kissed him back with the same desperate need.

I wasn't sure how long we stood there, well, he stood there while carrying me. After a while Sebastian pulled away, but only to press his lips on my forehead. 'Do you want to do back to the hotel?' he said against my forehead.

I yawned. I hadn't noticed before but I actually was quite tired. I nodded slowly.

Sebastian pressed his lips against mine for a second before pulling back completely. 'Very well.'

As he carried me back I managed to get something out of my mouth. 'You only did that so that it became even more impossible for me to hate you,' I said softly.

His fingers that were on my lower back found a way underneath my shirt and he chuckled. 'I admit defeat. Is there anything you don't know?'

'You,' I murmured, so soft that I wasn't even sure if he could hear it or not. 'I don't know you.' I yawned again. 'Not really.'

Just before I fell asleep completely I realised that the cold didn't bother me anymore. As if someone had given me the power to believe that the cold wouldn't hurt me. Yes, I may not know Sebastian, but he sure as hell knew me. Way too well.


XxX

End of the chapter! I had that last scene in my mind ever since I started to write this story, but now that I've finally written it, it felt forced. Aw, well, I liked to write it and I loved seeing the mental picture as I wrote it. So there you have it. I'm sorry this chapter was short, longer chapters will be coming up!

Silent Ninja 93: Thank you so much! Hope I made your day today as well ;)

promocat: Thanks! Hope I won't disappoint you!

trepidon: ha ha, here's more! And there will be more this week, probably on Friday, maybe sooner :)