A/N: As always thank you for the reviews of the last chapter. I know this is as super long chapter but I didn't want it split into two chapters. This chapter has a little bit of everything, and a lot of Joey. The dynamics always change when a new baby is introduced to the family, let alone two. Let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy!
Chapter 44
It had been four weeks since the babies were born and they were slowly getting into a routine. The twins had done very well despite having to stay in the hospital for several days. Like most babies they both lost a little weight after being born but Landon had dropped below five pounds and they wouldn't release him until he had gained those few ounces back. Presley didn't lose as much weight as her brother but had colic so the doctor's wanted to keep her as well. Even though it was only a couple days it nearly killed Alex and Olivia to go home without their children but they knew it was for their benefit. Joey also hated leaving them behind. The day Alex was released from the hospital he cried when they came home without the twins. He even went as far as asking if he could go to the hospital and spend the night with them so they wouldn't be alone.
Now that they had been home for several weeks the family was adjusting to the needs of two infants. Laura spent almost as much time at their apartment as she did at her own home. Olivia had taken a couple weeks off to help Alex and the twins get settled. She had gone back to work earlier in the week and just like she did after Joey was born she cried most of her first day back.
It was now Friday afternoon and Alex was home alone with all three for the first time. She had been alone with all three before but no more than an hour at most, today she was going to be alone with them all afternoon. She was beyond grateful to her mother, as well as her aunt Helen, for helping out since Olivia went back to work. Laura had spent the morning with her until she had to leave for a doctor's appointment that afternoon. Alex prayed as she closed the door behind her Mom that it would be an uneventful afternoon and Olivia would be home on time.
While they were in the process of getting the twins on a schedule Alex was grateful that Presley had woken to eat before her brother. As she sat feeding her son, feeling his body cradled close to hers and his dark eyes staring up at her, it amazed her that just a few short weeks ago she was able to feel him moving around inside of her. She still felt her heart seize when she would remember those few minutes of fear after hearing that the cord had wrapped around his neck. Alex couldn't imagine their life without him.
"Mommy?"
She looked up and smiled at Joey who was standing in front of her. He had been so helpful once the twins came home by bringing them a diaper or wipes, talking to the babies to try and calm them, but at the same time she could tell the newness and excitement was beginning to wear off. "What is it baby?"
"Can we go to the park?"
Alex gave him a sad smile "I'm sorry but not today."
"But Mommy!" he huffed "I want to go to the park and play! I not go to the park for forever!"
Alex had to hide her smile. Joey had just been to the park the weekend before when Tiffany came by to meet the twins. After meeting the newest members of the family she offered to take Joey out for a few hours. It turned out that a few hours of being able to run off his extra energy was exactly what he needed. "Sweetie I know you want to go play but we can't right now."
"But I want to go right now!" he said with a stomp of his foot.
Alex sighed "Joey we're not going to the park right now. Momma is at work and Grandma had to go to the doctor. I'm not taking the babies out today." She adjusts Landon to her shoulder to be burped and looked back at the irritated four year old standing in front of her. It was as if she was staring at the miniature version of Olivia, arms folded and the same scowl the brunette used when she was angry. Luckily for Alex she had nearly thirty years of holding her own with that same stare. "Why don't you pick out a movie and after I put your brother down we'll watch it together?"
"I wanna go to the park."
"I've already said no." she slid forward on the sofa "Now pick out a movie while I put the baby down."
Joey huffed as he turned away "Dumb babies."
"What was that?" Alex asked, her courtroom voice slipping out. Joey kept his back turned and refused to answer "John Joseph Cabot-Benson, I asked you a question." Joey turned back to look at his Mommy, a prominent frown on his face but also a hint of fear at the use of his full name. Alex waited a moment for a reply but didn't receive one. "Okay then," she pointed to the hallway "You're in timeout."
Joey began stomping off toward his timeout chair. He didn't understand why his Mommy wouldn't take him to the park. Alex wasn't having the stomping "Joey, come back here." Once he was standing in front of her again Alex looked him in the eye "Now, you will walk, not stomp, to timeout." As she watched him walk to timeout, the anger and frustration radiating off of him, she was reminded of when her Mom would do the same thing to her when she was a teen and would stomp up the stairs. As she passed him on her way to put Landon down she had the distinct feeling it was going to be a long evening.
Olivia sighed out of frustration as she sat in traffic. She had every intention to get home early knowing Alex would be alone with the kids, but it seemed as though nothing was working in her favor. Just as she was about to leave there had been a lead in their case only to find out it was a dead end. Now she sat in the car wishing she hadn't driven that morning. She had called Alex as she was leaving the precinct and could tell the blonde was nearing her wits end. She told Alex she would pick up dinner as well as pick up more formula. She remembered when Joey was a baby she felt like they were constantly buying formula but now with the twins it seemed that she was going to the store every few days.
Olivia walked into the apartment and could immediately tell it had been an afternoon. She carried the bags through to the kitchen, Joey following along behind her asking what she got. "I got you fettuccine alfredo."
Joey smiled "Garlic bread too?"
Olivia laughed and nodded, she never knew a child could love garlic as much as her son did. "Where's Mommy?"
"I don't know." He replied with a shrug.
"Did you have a good day?" again a shrug. Olivia kissed the little boy and told him to go wash his hands. When she entered their bedroom her heart broke when she saw Alex sitting on their bed crying. She glanced over at the twins as she walked over and took a seat next to her fiancé. "What's wrong sweetie?"
Alex leaned into Olivia's side and cried harder as she felt the brunette's strong arm slip around her waist and hold her close. "It's…just….been…a long day." She said between sobs and hiccups.
Olivia kissed the top of Alex's head "I'm so sorry. I wanted to be home sooner."
"It's not your fault." Alex said as she sat up and began wiping her eyes. "The twins were fussy after Mom left and then Joey had a small tantrum this afternoon." She sighed as she grabbed a tissue from the bedside table and held it to her nose. "He wanted to go to the park and I said no, it went downhill from there." She sniffled a bit as she tried not to cry "He called the babies dumb." She suddenly felt like a child telling her Mom that another kid had called her names. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry." Olivia said as she wiped Alex's tears and kissed her lightly. "I'm sorry I wasn't here to help you."
"I need to learn to handle all three on my own. I'm just not used to him acting like that. I mean I'm used to the little fits he throws but it was like he was just trying to see how far he could push me." she grinned slightly as she remembered their stare down "He used his best Det. Benson stare but as you know, that doesn't faze me."
Olivia chuckled "His Cabot stare is pretty scary though." she continued to hold Alex as her tears subsided "He's gonna have to learn that he can't always have his way."
"He didn't always have his way before. I mean he would get mad when he couldn't do something because one of us was working but his fits were never this bad."
"I know he loves them but I think he's a little jealous. He was used to having our attention pretty much whenever he wanted. It's just going to take him some time to adjust that's all."
"You're probably right." Alex sighed.
Olivia continued to hold the blonde until she could feel her begin to relax. When she pulled back she could see the exhaustion in her fiancé's eyes. "How long before the twins need to eat again?"
"I fed them just a little while before you got here, so we've got a couple hours."
Olivia pushed a stray lock of hair back that had fallen from Alex's ponytail "How about we eat while they sleep and then you can lay down and take a nap."
"I can't let you do that Liv, you've worked all day." Alex tried to protest.
"And so have you. In all honesty you've worked harder today than I have." She stood and pulled Alex to her feet "I ordered dinner from Carlo's." she smiled when she saw a genuine smile spread across Alex's face "Yes, I ordered you the eggplant lasagna." Alex raised her eyebrows in question causing Olivia to chuckle "And yes I got cannoli's for dessert."
As the evening wore on Olivia tried to be understanding to how Joey was feeling but his mood was grating on her last nerve. While he went about playing like he always would he wasn't as talkative as he usually was. As much as Olivia tried to talk to him and include him in what she was doing he didn't seem too interested. She made a mental note to see if Laura, and maybe Helen, could watch Joey one afternoon so they could take him out for some time alone with them.
Alex stretched slightly as she woke up. She looked at the alarm clock on Olivia's bedside table and was surprised to see it was almost eight. While she was still exhausted her nap did give her enough of an energy boost to get her through to bedtime. As she walked into the living room her heart melted at the sight of her family. Joey sat off to the side working one of his many puzzles while halfway watching a cartoon. The little boy loved doing puzzles which Alex said was his detective skills coming out, a comment that while cute terrified both his mothers'. Alex then looked to the sofa where both twins were laying while Olivia knelt in the floor with all the things needed for their sponge bath. "Need some help?" she asked as she leaned down and kissed the top of Olivia's head.
"No thanks, I think I've got everything under control." Olivia said as she began to undress Landon for his bath.
"Okay." Alex walked over and sat knelt in the floor next to Joey. "It's bath time buddy."
"Do I have to take a bath?" he asked while still looking at his puzzle.
"Yeah, because if you don't you'll start to look like Pig Pen from Peanuts." She saw the small grin on his face. "Come on," she said as she stood and held her hand out to him "After your bath you can pick out a movie and we'll watch it before bedtime."
It seemed that having a little one on one time with his Mommy helped to improve Joey's mood slightly. Alex told him to go pick a movie while she helped Olivia get the babies bottles ready.
"He seems to be in a better mood." Olivia said as she pulled two bottles from the refrigerator to be heated.
Alex nodded in agreement. "I was thinking about calling Mom to see if she could babysit a couple hours tomorrow afternoon. I know she needs a break too but I thought maybe we could take Joey out for a while."
"I was thinking the same thing."
When they walked back into the living room Joey was standing in front of the swings staring at his siblings and talking to them but they were unable to hear what he was saying. He turned back when he heard them enter the room "They're crying again." the annoyance evident in his voice.
"They're just hungry. They can't tell us when they're hungry like you can." Olivia said gently as she picked her daughter up.
"What movie did you pick?" Alex asked as she walked toward the entertainment center.
"Can you just read me a story after you feed the babies?"
"Of course we can." Alex replied as she ran her fingers through his hair as she passed the boy.
After the twins were down for the night Alex and Olivia curled up on the sofa with Joey between them. He loved it when they would read to him, especially Olivia because she would do funny voices for the different characters. The couple looked over their son's head and smiled as he laughed at the story. Both would readily agree their son's laughter was one of their favorite sounds in the world. After all the broken children they saw in their day there was nothing more soothing to their soul than the light, happy laughter of their son.
They were in the middle of tucking him into bed when a small cry was heard coming down the hall. Olivia sighed before leaning over and kissing Joey's cheek "I love you." she then left the room to tend to the crying infant.
Joey rolled his eyes and turned to Alex who was still sitting on the edge of his bed. "How come they always gotta cry?"
Alex reached out and lightly brushed his hair back from his forehead, making a mental note he would need a haircut soon. "Sweetie it's the only way they can let us know if they need something. You can tell me and Momma when you're hungry, or tired, or need to go to the bathroom. They can't tell us anything."
"But they cry all night too."
Alex smiled "Well their tummies are little so they have to eat every couple hours. That's why they cry at night. As they get older though they'll start to sleep through the night though." He nodded that he understood but Alex could tell he was still a little skeptical. She continued to lightly trace his forehead and jaw line with her fingertips knowing it had always made him sleepy. In a matter of minutes he could barely hold his eyes open. Alex leaned down and kissed his cheek "Love you baby."
"Love you Mommy." he mumbled as he settled further into his bed.
Olivia slowly woke and winced as she felt a small twinge in her back. She blinked for a minute as she got her bearings and realized she was on the sofa and not in bed. She smiled though as she looked down and saw Presley asleep on her chest, the infant's mouth slightly open in the same way Alex often slept. The little girl had been fussy most of the night so after many failed attempts Olivia took her to the living room to keep her from waking her twin as well as Alex. Olivia wrapped her arms around her baby girl and held her close for a moment. She was about to get up when she heard a noise. She slowly sat up and looked around the darkened room when she heard the noise again in the entryway. She turned on the lamp on the end table and walked toward the entryway. She was a little nervous at what she might find, especially since she was holding an infant. Nothing could've prepared her for what she saw though as she stopped in the entryway. "What are you doing?"
Joey slowly turned around wide eyed when he heard his Momma's voice. It dawned on him that his plan to run away maybe wasn't that good. He should've known one of his mothers' would be up with one of the babies. He stayed quiet unsure what to say.
Olivia walked closer and her heart began to pound as she realized how close her son had come to leaving the apartment in the middle of the night. Just knowing what could possibly happen to him alone in the city terrified her beyond belief. She looked at him as he stood there in his pajamas, jacket, and his backpack that he would take to Laura's when he stayed the night and his teddy bear clutched in his left arm. She checked the door ensuring he hadn't unlocked it then placed her free hand on his shoulder and guided him back to the living room. "Stay here." She said as she took Presley back to the bedroom and put her in the bassinet. She considered waking Alex but at the same time she didn't see the point in both of them losing sleep.
Joey sat on the sofa with his head down. He heard Olivia come back in the room but he wouldn't look at her, he knew he was in trouble. The evening had gone pretty good after his Momma had come home, at least it had till his brother or sister had to interrupt while they were putting him to bed. The last straw had been when one of them kept crying all night. He figured it had to be his sister when he saw his Momma holding the little girl.
Olivia took a seat next to him and looked down "Where were you going?" he sat there silently. "Joey, I asked you a question. Now what were you doing?" again silence only this time he added a shrug of his shoulders. Her fear was turning to anger with each passing second. "Joey I want to know what you were doing."
"I was going to live with Grandma!" he said loudly as he looked up at his brunette mother.
Olivia was still scared and angry but she was surprised how much it hurt to hear him say that. While she knew it was simple sibling jealousy it hurt to think he didn't want to live with them. She took a deep breath to control her emotions. "Why do you want to go live with Grandma?"
Now the little boy was getting mad. Why couldn't his Momma understand "The babies." He said under his breath but just loud enough for Olivia to hear.
That one hurt even more Olivia decided. Just knowing what they went through to get their children; the pain, the stress, the failed pregnancies, it made the comment feel like a knife to the heart. "Why?"
His Momma is so smart why didn't she understand. "Because!" he said with an angry look "They cry all the time. They smell." Olivia had to hold back a smile at that as she remembered the first time Joey was exposed to a dirty diaper, and the look on his face as he gagged and ran from the room. "They want you and Mommy all the time." his voice softening and tears began forming in his eyes "And nobody loves me anymore because they love the babies more."
Olivia gasped and felt her own tears begin as her son's confession essentially ripped her heart out. "Oh baby, that's not true! We love you. We love you so much!" she couldn't hold back as she looked into those bright blue eyes that were shining with tears and pulled Joey into her arms and held him tight. All of her anger and fear from finding him about to leave to the hurt she felt at his confession came pouring out. Joey let his tears flow freely as well and Olivia could feel her shirt becoming wet from his tears.
Once their tears began to subside Olivia sat back on the sofa and kept Joey on her lap. He straddled her legs and rested his head against her shoulder as she continued to rub his back. When he finally sat up she cupped his face in her hands and used her thumbs to wipe his tears. "We love you Joey. We love you so much. I know you're having trouble adjusting to having two babies in the house and I know they take a lot of our time and attention but I promise you we love you."
"But I wanted to go to the park and Mommy said no."
"Sweetheart you now that sometimes we can't just go whenever you want to. You know how sometimes we couldn't go because me or Mommy would have to go to work?" he nodded. "This is kinda the same. The babies are little and Mommy and I aren't ready to take all three of you out by ourselves. Plus it was a little chilly today, it's not good for babies to be out in cold air." She wiped her eyes as a few more tears threatened to escape "Joey, Mommy and I love you so much that we can't even explain it."
"Momma's right."
Olivia and Joey looked up to see Alex standing in the doorway leading to the hallway.
The blonde walked over and joined her fiancé and son. She had woken up alone and was about to go back to sleep when she heard their voices. She could only imagine what was going on but she was intrigued by Joey's backpack sitting in the floor. Alex sat down as close as she could to Olivia and took her son's hand in her own "We love you, as well as your brother and sister, more than anything in the world."
"Really?"
"Really." Olivia said firmly. Even though he was almost five she and Alex had yet to decide if they would ever tell him how he came to be their son. "Joey you, your brother and sister are very special to us. You three are our miracle babies and we can't imagine what life would be like if we didn't have you."
Alex ran her fingers along his arms "How about we get Grandma to babysit one day and just the three of us go out for a while?"
At that Joey's face lit up "Just me, you and Momma?" Alex nodded. "Can we go to the park?"
"If the weather's nice, we'll have to wait and see."
Joey began feeling sleepy as both his Mommy and Momma ran their fingers over his back. He moved so he was leaning against both of them. The three stayed that way until they felt his breathing even out and his body go limp. Olivia carried him to bed and waited till she was sure he was asleep the returned to her spot next to the blonde.
"So what brought that on?" she pointed to his backpack "Why is that in here?"
"He was running away." Olivia said with a sigh as she collapsed onto the sofa.
"He what?!"
"I mean even if he had made it downstairs I know Sam would've called us, he wouldn't let him out the door." Joey loved their night doorman and the older man, a retired cop, felt the same way about the little boy. Olivia shook her head as a million thoughts ran through her mind "Alex if he had gotten out of the apartment…" she trailed off as a shiver ran down her spine. They lived in a safe building, their neighbors were nice people, but she couldn't vouch for everyone in the building or the visitors.
"I know we can't let him be in charge and he has to understand that there will be times the twins will take up a lot of our attention, but I do think we need to make a better effort with him. I think we should set aside a little time to spend with him, that's why I mentioned the park."
"I had the same thought earlier." Olivia laid her head back as the fear was turning to exhaustion. "I'm gonna call the Captain tomorrow and ask for some more time off."
"Liv you don't have to." Alex whispered as she tried to stay awake.
"I shouldn't have gone back so soon, you need help here Alex. You are doing an amazing job with them, all three of them, but I need to be here helping." Olivia yawned as she stood and held her hand out to Alex. They stopped and looked in Joey's room, both grateful to see him sleeping peacefully.
"I'm so tired." Alex whispered as the settled into bed. She rolled onto her side so she was facing Olivia, wrapping her arm around the brunette's waist and tangling their legs together. Alex lightly ran her fingertips along Olivia's jaw before pressing their lips together in a gentle kiss. They were already drifting off to sleep before their lips had parted.
Saturday passed at an agonizing pace. Both ladies were exhausted, from Joey's runaway attempt to the twins waking them every couple hours they spent most of the day looking forward to bedtime that night. Olivia called the Captain and was grateful when her commanding officer granted her request for more time. Joey's mood seemed to have improved a bit as well. It was almost as if he could sense how much he had scared his mothers' the night before. He once again asked if they could go out but was okay when Olivia said no since it was raining. He also spent more time around his younger siblings. He stood over their swings and talked to them and even tried to explain the movie he was watching.
Alex called her mother and her aunt that afternoon to see if they would be able to watch the twins on Sunday afternoon. Both ladies agreed and after talking plans over with Olivia they decided to hold off telling their son in case something came up to change their plans. That afternoon the cool, dreary day outside finally worked its way into the apartment. The twins were put down for a nap and Alex had finally convinced Joey he should take a nap. She and Olivia rested easier when Joey climbed into their bed and settled in between them.
Sunday morning Alex was standing at the counter fixing enough bottles to get them through the afternoon and evening. Laura and Helen was due to arrive within the half hour and they had yet to tell Joey about their day out together.
"Mommy!"
Alex placed the last few bottles in the refrigerator and headed to see what her son was calling her for. She entered the living room to find him standing over the swings looking back and forth at the infants. He turned toward her, his face scrunched up "One of them needs a clean diaper." He said as he gagged slightly "That's just yucky Mommy."
Alex laughed as she walked over and could instantly tell it was Landon in need of the diaper. "You used to be just as bad." She said as she laid the little boy on the sofa to be changed.
"Nuh uh." Joey replied defiantly.
"Yeah buddy, you were." She quickly changed Landon, having learned years before that you had to be quick when changing a baby boy. She then carried Presley back over to the sofa to be changed. Joey stayed close to her side and asked little questions about his siblings while she tended the infant.
"Mommy!" Joey shouted causing his sister to jump.
"What?"
Joey looked almost horrified as he pointed at his sister then looked to Alex and whispered "Her privates falled off."
Alex had to turn her head and bite her lip to keep from laughing. While they hadn't explained to him the differences between boys and girls they had agreed that if he asked they would explain it as best they could in terms he could understand. They hadn't told him the clinical terms for certain body parts but he did know what areas were private. She was just getting herself under control when she caught sight of Olivia standing in the hallway giggling. The blonde quickly worked out in her mind what she was going to say. "No sweetie nothing fell off. That's just how girls are made." She quickly fastened the diaper back and turned to face him. Seeing the wheels turning in his mind she dreaded what was coming next.
He tilted his head in the same way Olivia would "Yeah but, how does she pee?"
Alex ran her hand through her hair and looked to Olivia. Seeing the brunette shaking with laughter she knew she wouldn't be getting any help. She was about to attempt an answer when Joey spoke up again.
"Is that how you and Momma are made?"
"Oh dear Lord." Alex whispered as she heard Olivia's laughter getting louder. She decided now was the perfect time to announce their outing. "Guess what we're doing today?" he looked at her quizzically. "Grandma and Aunt Helen are coming to watch the twins while me, you and Momma go to the park and the zoo."
All questions about the differences between boys and girls were quickly forgotten. Joey jumped around the room with excitement. "Really?" he asked as he ran to Olivia. "Just us, no babies?"
Olivia picked him up "Nope, no babies."
An hour later Alex, Olivia and Joey were making their way through the Central Park Zoo. "I want to see the penguins!" he exclaimed as he tugged on his mothers' hands. He wished they would walk faster. "Ooh and the monkeys and the lions." He took off in a run but didn't get far because of the grip both women had on his hands "Ugh, come on you guys!" he shook his head as he pulled them forward "You're so slow!"
They spent several hours wandering around the zoo before finally heading out for a walk through the park. Both ladies were exhausted but were having too much fun to care. It also seemed that Joey had moved from being insecure and slightly jealous to the happy, curious and bright eyed boy they knew and loved.
They went to one of their favorite diners for a late lunch. While his parents went the healthy route, Alex ordering a salad and Olivia ordering a wrap, they indulged their son and allowed him a cheeseburger and fries with a chocolate milkshake. They ordered a banana split for dessert to share. As they walked home both were sure that after the meal he had their son would be on a sugar high for the rest of the evening.
They were barely through the door when Joey ran over to where his brother and sister were in their bouncy seats and dropped to his knees in front of them. He rattled endlessly about the park and the zoo. He then grabbed the bag from the gift shop. "Look what I got you." he said as he pulled two stuffed animals from the bag "I got you a lion Landon. They're big and they growl really loud." He laid the stuffed toy next to his brother then slid over to his sister "I got a polar bear for you Presley. They're white and they live where it's really, really cold. They can swim too!"
Alex felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders as she watched Joey bonding with his siblings. They knew deep down he loved them but she was relieved to see him interacting with them rather than simply staring at them.
"All kids are like this at some point when a new baby is brought into the family." Helen said as she stood between the women and watched her great-nephew. "I remember when Will was born. Sara was so excited until he came home. I caught her offering to sell him to the mailman one time."
Alex looked shocked at what she was hearing. She didn't get to see her cousins much now that they were adults with Will being stationed in Germany and Sara living in North Carolina with her family. Sara was older but she and Will were about the same age, but as she thought back the pair always seemed to so close. Alex only hoped that her children would eventually be the same way. "I hope you're right."
The two older women said their goodbye's with Laura telling them she would be back the next day. She was surprised when Olivia informed her she was taking more time off so Laura could take a break.
Later when it was time for the babies to eat Olivia curled up on the sofa with Presley while Alex settled into a chair with Landon. Joey lay in the floor watching Lilo and Stich, his newest favorite movie. While they had seen the movie several times over the last month both ladies would admit they enjoyed it very much. The silence was broken when Joey turned to face them "I love you."
Olivia smiled brightly with a few tears in her eyes and looked to Alex, who was also fighting tears, before looking back to the little boy. "We love you too baby, we love you so much."
Joey grinned before turning back to his movie "I know."
