SORENESS.
Everything hurts. I couldn't be able to describe it if you'd paid me.
In vain, I try to stretch, but my body is too sore from the shock, even now, days after. Some parts of my skin are burnt off, still peeling. I dare not touch them. The doctors insist I stay longer, and it feels surreal when my family isn't here. My friends are worried and traumatized, so am I, I get that, but they don't want to get in my way. I'm sure they'd visit me more if it weren't for that. I can't believe that this happened to me.
One minute I was posing, the next I was screaming for them—my friends, they were there when it happened—to run, I didn't know how far the shockwaves would arch, and then, I was engulfed with electric light. It was so fast, and yet it felt like forever, my life flashing before my eyes.
They're dead, I'm dead, this is the Nothing, I remember being vaguely aware of. And then it was as if something else was happening, I don't quite remember what, just…lightheadedness. It was suddenly as if I was still there. I'm not making any sense. I'm sorry.
I guess I passed out again after that.
No one knows how I am still alive. There's a button next to my bed that I can press for a nurse, order food, or maybe just someone to talk to if they're not busy. Lonely kid by himself in a hospital, they understand. I don't know how I am still…irrationally, I can't decide if I want to avoid the Portal, or see it again, for the sake of closure. Would it be better if I avoided it altogether?
No, never-mind, I'm sure that my parents aren't going to let me near that stupid thing again for as long as I live. Oh, my god. They were terrified. I never want to see those expressions on their faces ever again.
My sister. She was dead quiet. I should have talked to her more last time she was here, I think, I mean…I mean…what do I mean…
