55 Dougie's POV
I hated this interviewer, this interview, and everything involved. Couldn't she leave me alone, I didn't want to talk about being jealous of Harry and his boyfriend, because I was jealous even though this boyfriend was made up. I had no reason to be jealous and yet I was, I was so jealous, and hated the imaginary man I had created in my mind. I hated all of this, it was a ridiculous thing to be a part of and I hated that I had to agree and play along with it.
"I'm happy for Harry and his boyfriend, he's a good friend, he's like another brother." I smiled sweetly, trying not to sound sarcastic or like I wanted out of here.
"Aw, that's adorable!" Yes so cute, I was lying my ass off just to please the world and Harry's asshole parents who couldn't stand the thought of me, how absolutely adorable.
"Well I think that's a wrap for today, thank you all for coming, it's been a pleasure." With one last smile and a 'thanks' we ran out of the room and back to the car, breathing a collective sigh of relief.
"Doug, are you okay?" Harry squeezed my shoulder; I let him, though right now I would have preferred to be left alone.
"Fine, just perfect." I leant against the window, curling into a ball in the seat and hugging my knees.
"I'm sorry, for what I said in there, but there wasn't really a choice in it, you know?" Harry apologised, sliding his hand down to hold onto my own.
"I know, I just... I'm still not fond of hearing it." I didn't hold his hand, but didn't pull away either. I wanted him close, really I did, but at the same time I needed to be alone for a while.
"Sorry, if I could say anything else, literally anything, I would. But we have to put them all off the scent, if I had my way, I'd be shouting out that you were my lover and about how brilliant you are." Harry's eyes begged me to believe him. And I did, I believed that he would, but it was just so hard to deal with this. I would have preferred dealing with the threatening letters than this. At least the insults were directing straight at me because I was recognised as Harry's other half.
"I get that... just... can you not encourage the brotherly bond so much? Or make it seem like I'm a helpless loner please? I'd really rather not deal with that." I couldn't do anything about the whole fake boyfriend jealousy, but I could at least try to get rid of the 'aw he's so helpless he's sharing someone's boyfriend' narrative surrounding me at the moment. I was not helpless, not in the slightest. Yes I was shy and filled with anxiety most of the time, but damn it I could do things like make friends when I needed to, I didn't need to be a part of some sort of time share with my drummer.
"Of course, I'll try my best, not sure what I can do about the interviewers saying it, but I'll tone it done, if that's what you want." Harry promised, giving me a small smile.
"Thank you." I gave him an even smaller one back.
"Anything for you Doug, you know that." Harry pulled my closer to kiss my forehead, before letting me settle against his chest for a hug on the way home.
I couldn't help but snuggle closer, taking in the feeling of being held like this, revelling in the fact that I was the only one allowed this. Not some fake boyfriend, not Tom or Danny, not anybody else but me. Sure we were acting like Harry had a fantastic, perfect boyfriend who met his parent's high standards, and it hurt like hell every time we were questioned on it, but in the back of this car, right now, I was the one being held. And I was the one being loved. Currently that's all that mattered, that Harry loved me, I just needed him to love me, that was all. I just needed him to love me.
