So... a few of you haven't quite gotten it yet. Hopefully this will explain exactly what Rose has been up to these last eighteen months.
And for those of you who wanted angst: coming right up!
Rose clung to the Doctor and cried quietly into his shoulder. He rubbed her back while he murmured too low for them to hear.
Martha's heart broke for them.
Eighteen months.
She couldn't quite wrap her head around it. Not half an hour ago Rose and she had been sitting together in front of a computer in the silo. Now Rose was suddenly eighteen months older. It was almost inconceivable. Oh, God, how was the Doctor going to handle this? His biggest fear was not having enough time with her, and now eighteen months of Rose's life had passed in an instant.
Rose stretched up to kiss him and Martha looked away once more to give them privacy. Jack, too, had averted his eyes. She got the feeling that wasn't something he'd normally do. Oh, of course. Rose must've been with Jack the whole time. Not as a Torchwood agent—Rose hated Torchwood too much to join them—but with no one else in the universe who could understand her plight, of course she would've sought him out. He had to have known the entire time he was with them… what would happen to Rose… but he hadn't said a word.
"Why?" Martha asked quietly. Jack glanced over. "Why didn't you warn us? You could've prevented this." Surely there could've been some way. They could've landed here sooner or…or…
He shook his head and replied softly, "No, I couldn't have. When I jumped onto the TARDIS earlier, Rose had been a part of my timeline for over a year. If I'd warned you then that never would've happened, and if it never happened, then how could I know to warn you?"
"Paradox," she murmured.
"Exactly." He looked at the couple for a moment then cleared his throat loudly. "Rose, I'm sorry. But we've got a lot to do and not a lot of time to do it in."
Rose stepped out of the Doctor's arms and inhaled shakily. "Right." Then her back straightened, shoulders squaring, and she lifted her chin. "Right. Okay." She jogged up the stairs and the Doctor behind her, looking just a bit dazed. "What have you told them so far?"
"Nothing much." Jack stood up. "We've only been here maybe ten minutes."
"I know." Rose made a face. "Kind of hard to miss it when something punches a hole in the fabric of reality a few miles away."
The Doctor blinked. "You what?"
"You know I can feel it when something punches through from the Time Vortex. Remember the Family of Blood?" She made a face. "Those manipulators are like nails trying to force their way through a duvet."
Rose glanced at Martha standing near the coffee table then did a double take. Her mouth stretched into a wide smile and she crossed the space between them to give her a hug. "Hey, Martha. It's good to see you."
Martha wasn't sure what to say. It had only been half an hour, after all. What did you even say in a situation like this?
Rose seemed to understand because her smile turned somewhat sympathetic before she headed over to the terminal where Jack was. She gave him a hug as well, patting his back firmly. "You've been gone a while, Jack. Two months. And everyone's ticked."
"You didn't tell them?"
She shook her head. "No. Besides, they made their own theories." She jabbed her thumb in the direction of the sign on the glass door to their left.
Boldly gone where no man has gone before
Jack read it over once then snorted. "Where are they, anyway?"
"The Himalayas. We got a call a few weeks back about something falling from the sky not too far from Everest and then a wave of missing locals."
"But why were we called?" He asked. "There's no rift out there. That's more of UNIT's jurisdiction anyway."
She shrugged. "I don't know. And I don't know how it's going, either. Haven't heard from them in five days. No reception, probably. I stayed behind just in case…and here you are." She smiled at them all for a moment then shook her head quickly. "Plus I've been able to keep tabs on Saxon. Oh, by the way, it's Election Day."
Jack made a face. "How's it looking?"
"How do you think?"
"Did you vote?"
Rose nodded. "'S what I was out doing. Just left the place, actually."
"Wait, Election Day?" Martha blurted out. She shook her head slowly, mind whirling. "But…it's two days after I met you. That's so weird. We went flying all over the universe, all through time and space, in two days." Martha laughed weakly. "Suppose I should go vote."
"In Cardiff?" Rose raised her eyebrows. "Besides, you've been gone a year. Do you even remember the candidates?"
"Yeah, Saxon…" she had to think about it for a moment. "Avery."
"And who would you vote for?"
"Saxon." Wasn't it obvious? He was the best choice.
Rose didn't seem too surprised but she still shook her head sadly. "I think you might want to reconsider that."
"Who's Saxon?" the Doctor asked.
Rose sighed walked over to the terminal located under a staircase with a box of leftover pizza on it, set the box aside, sat down in the chair, and started typing. Her fingers were almost a blur as they raced across the keys and on screen window after window began to pop up. The three of them gathered around her. The Doctor placed his hand on her back, and Martha's be a liar if she said she didn't notice the way Rose relaxed at the contact.
As she typed, she started explaining. "The Master and I have been here for eighteen months, right? Well, after I got away from him, we saw him a handful of times here in Cardiff. After that he just disappeared. Then he showed up a few months later."
She brought up a picture of a man in his early thirties with brown hair who was smiling at the camera like he knew an important secret you didn't. Martha recognized him instantly, of course. Everyone in Britain knew that face. And back in the lab, when she'd heard his voice over the speakers, she knew she'd heard it before. Now she knew where.
The Doctor stiffened. "That's him."
"No, but…how can he be the Master?" Martha asked. "He's been around ages."
Jack shook his head. "You're right; he's got an entire background. Rose, bring up those files."
Rose nodded and the keys clacked as her fingers flew across them. Another window popped up over Saxon's picture—a website dedicated to Saxon. Martha recognized it as well as the information. He'd graduated from Cambridge, Rugby Blue, wrote a novel, went into business. He married a woman named Lucy.
"He's really charismatic, too." Rose added, mouth puckered like she'd tasted something sour. "When you hear him talking it just sounds… I hate him. I know what he is. But everything he says is just…"
"Good." Martha supplied.
Rose nodded.
The Doctor looked between them for a moment, brow furrowed. "Eighteen months. He's always been sort of…hypnotic but this on a massive scale. So how has he managed all this? …When did he first come on the scene?"
"Not long after you deposed Harriet Jones," Jack said. Rose glanced at the Doctor sharply. "He became Minister in charge of the Archangel Project. He's been rising through the ranks since. Became Minister of Defense not long after. But he really became prominent when he shot down the Racnoss on Christmas Eve." He turned to the Doctor, smirking. "Nice job, by the way."
"Oh, thanks."
Jack folded his arms. "We've been doing what we can to stop him, even went so far as to sic Torchwood One on him. But, somehow, he managed to convince them he was completely human."
"But he could never get the government to do anything against us!" Rose added gleefully. "Torchwood is far above him. And if he ever tried to come at us directly, well…" she trailed off, gesturing around the room. Martha's eyes lingered on the room full of weapons across the way.
The Doctor was staring at Rose like someone who'd resigned himself to his fate. "You work for Torchwood." It wasn't a question
Rose stiffened for a second and then she nodded. "Yeah, I do."
"Why?"
"At first it was 'cos I had to. Then I realized that I wanted to." She twisted in the chair to look at him, chin lifted challengingly, but there was an unmistakable flash of fear there.
The Doctor drew his head back.
"That's not a problem, is it?" Jack asked coolly. He folded his arms.
The Doctor didn't look furious like Martha had expected. Maybe a little angry but mostly just upset. He stared at the two of them for a long minute and then he sighed heavily, closing his eyes. "And did she make a difference?"
"Yes. She's been fantastic."
The Doctor opened his eyes and smiled proudly. "Okay."
"Okay?" Rose repeated hesitantly…hopefully.
He squeezed her shoulder and nodded. "So, he can't touch Torchwood. Got it. What else? What else has he been up to? Anything significant?"
Jack and Rose exchanged looks. He shrugged and Rose said, "Well, he got married. Dunno if that's much, but he did mock you for stooping to mating with a human."
The Doctor looked startled. "Married? You sure she's human?"
"She's got a life, one much more thorough than his." Jack said. "Saxon's story has got holes in it—nothing gaping that'd be too noticeable, but little things. Little inconsistencies. Things that don't quite add up or match. We noticed them because we were looking for them, but there has to have been others who've noticed. But no one's said anything. It's like they didn't care."
"Married," the Doctor repeated under his breath.
"But Lucy Cole's not like that." Rose started typing again and brought up her file. "School records go all the way back. Medical records from infancy, birth certificate checks out in all the systems. Photos, videos, news articles, everything. Lucy's as human as they come."
Martha had seen Lucy's picture almost as often as she'd seen Harold Saxon's but she still found herself staring at the woman like she'd never seen her before. "But she doesn't know, does she? About him. I mean, who would stay with him if they knew what he was?"
"You'd be surprised," the Doctor muttered darkly.
"I'm not sure what she knows." Rose chewed on the inside of her lip and leaned back in the chair. "I spoke to her not too long ago. Both of them, actually."
"You what?" Jack demanded.
"Saxon came to Cardiff for some last minute campaigning stuff. Lucy was with him. I found them out walking one day. Don't look at me like that, Jack. We were out in public. I knew he wouldn't try anything."
The Doctor folded his arms. "So what happened?"
"I asked Lucy if she knew the truth about her Harry. From what I gathered, I think she knew some of it and her body language didn't scream for help. So whatever he's up to, I think she's in on it. Plus, right around the time she started coming onto the scene, the TARDIS made a couple of trips. Long trips. It…" she struggled to find the words and then simply shook her head. "I figured they were related."
"What about recently? Has he been making any trips?"
"Not since—" Rose stopped abruptly and exchanged a fearful look with Jack.
"It's up to you," he told her quietly.
Rose exhaled slowly and hit the escape key three times. The windows on screen disappeared. She turned around in her chair to face the Doctor. "We…really need to talk."
"I don't like the sound of that." He said.
"You shouldn't."
Jack caught Martha's eye. "I'm gonna go vote. Care to join me?" Though his expression made it clear he really wasn't asking.
Ok, so it clearly wasn't good if they didn't want her knowing. But why couldn't she? She deserved to know what was going on just as much as the Doctor did. She was involved in this, too. And she had her family to worry about. But the Master…there was no way he could know who she was. He'd never even heard her last name and, really, she could've come from anywhere in time. There was no reason to think he'd assume she was from this time period.
"We'll be back later," Jack said. "Martha, this way."
Martha sighed but followed him towards the door Rose had entered through earlier.
Rose watched them go silently. She'd seen the hurt on Martha's face and felt bad but, really, this wasn't something she wanted to tell the Doctor with an audience. When Jack and Martha were gone, she got to her feet and faced the Doctor again. Reaching up, she placed her hands on either side of his face and smiled when he leaned into her touch.
"I've missed you so much," she told him. "You have no idea."
"I think I might, actually." He said quietly.
"…Yeah, I guess you would." Rose sighed. "I know you have questions and I promise I'll do my best to answer them but—but not here." She glanced at the security camera just over his shoulder. "We have cameras in most of the Hub but there's a few places that aren't monitored."
She let her hands fall from his face and slipped one into his hand. "Come on."
Rose led the Doctor up the stairs above her terminal to the second level. "When I first got here, Torchwood One was still in power. Jack had severed almost every single tie to them but our security footage went to their archives—something about some clause in the contracts and charters—and they occasionally swooped in if they deemed a case of ours worthy of interest."
Up to the third floor, then down the first hallway on the right.
"So how did he explain your presence on the security footage?" the Doctor wondered.
"They never asked." She shrugged. "My guess is by that point they didn't really care what we did. In any case, they never made the connection or you wouldn't have been able to pull that trick with my mum that day at Canary Wharf."
He nodded. "Where are we going?"
She led him past the rest and recreation room and the kitchen. "Jack wouldn't let me live on my own. He said that it was too dangerous for me to be out there in some flat where anyone could sneak in at any time they wanted. I didn't like it but I knew he was right."
"So…you live here?" he guessed.
"Mmhmm. There's a few rooms in this place that aren't in use. Wouldn't really call most of 'em rooms, though. More like nooks or cupboards."
She stopped in the middle of the hallway. On either side of them were two steel doors labeled with the Torchwood logo and big yellow letters: WARNING: HIGHLY DANGEROUS OBJECTS WITHIN. Beside each door was a simple thumb print scanner. Rose placed hers on the scanner on the left side. It beeped once and the door hissed as it unlocked. Rose pulled the door open wide enough for them to slip in, motioning the Doctor in first, and pulled the door shut behind them.
She hit the light switch and the lights flickered on and she heard the Doctor's breath catch in his throat.
Her room wasn't much. It had been just another storage cupboard until she had moved in. Well, a storage cupboard for highly dangerous alien artifacts, but those were long gone. Still, there wasn't much room to begin with. She had a single sized bed (TARDIS blue duvet), a small wardrobe, a dresser with a mirror bolted to the wall above it, and a table next to her bed with a pink and yellow lamp on top. The walls were painted the same color as the TARDIS's coral struts. They'd managed to find a rug that felt like the carpet in her room on the TARDIS and even though it was lime green, they'd bought three of them to cover all the remaining empty floor space. There was just enough room for her to move around between all the furniture, but no more than that.
It was cleaner than her room on the TARDIS had been, too. Such a small space had to be kept tidy, because even a few things out of place could make the whole room look a mess. Not that anyone else ever came in here. Tosh, Gwen, Owen, and Ianto knew for a fact she lived in the Hub but they'd only just learned where. Jack had removed the only two cameras in the area so if the CCTV footage was hacked, there would be no record of where her room was. Jack was the only other person who knew. He'd helped her make it what it was. Not a home. But it was a place she could live.
"You can sit down if you want," she offered, unzipping her jacket.
The Doctor looked around the room, taking in everything, from the lime green rugs to the makeup scattered across her dresser. "Not much a color scheme," he finally said.
Rose laughed and nudged him with her shoulder. "Shut up."
He grinned playfully, shucking his jacket, tossed it on the bedpost, then sat down on the edge of the bed.
She set her jacket over his. She heard him inhale sharply and she realized the gun she had holstered under her left arm was suddenly visible. He must've managed to avoid touching it earlier when he'd been holding her. That or he'd felt it but simply hadn't paid any mind to it. She carefully avoided his gaze as she removed the holster and hung it from the hook on the side of her wardrobe.
"You carry a gun now?" he asked flatly.
"Yes. I tried never to use it at in the field at first, but then Tosh nearly got killed because I didn't." She took a deep breath and let it out. "I have to carry it with me while on missions but I only wanted to use it as a last resort. So I learned how to fight."
"Fight?"
"Hand to hand combat," she clarified. "Mostly self defense, but some offensive fighting, too. Been formally training and Jack's been giving me lessons as well. He knows a lot more than I thought he did and, well, can't help but using some of that in class. My instructors like to tease that I was some sort of ninja in a past life." She sank down beside him on the bed. "So I usually just keep my gun under my jacket. It tends to make people more trusting when they don't see a piece on you."
"So what is it you do on the team?"
"Translations, mostly."
He arched one eyebrow. "Rose, you're monolingual."
"Hey, I used to be pretty good at French, y'know. Was gonna sit an A-level for it. But it doesn't matter 'cos I've got the TARDIS. The translator still works for me, even now. I'm usually busy translating things—objects, transmissions, papers—and sometimes we'll have a human or an alien in here that doesn't speak a word of English. I translate for them. When I think about how disastrous it might've been without me there…" she shuddered. "I've saved so many lives just by talking. …That's your job, isn't it?"
The Doctor smiled proudly but it didn't quite meet his eyes. "How many times have you come up with a solution I never would've even thought of? And here you are now, defending the Earth, helping people, like you always have. I am so proud of you."
She searched his gaze for a moment. "Then what's wrong?" she murmured.
His eyes lingered on her face for a moment before flicking down to her chest. He reached out and slid his hand beneath her TARDIS key—still warm, even now—and then he fingered her necklace. The same one he'd given her on the flower planet just before they'd been separated. He seemed to struggle with something for a moment before he swallowed. "I gave this to you yesterday."
Oh. Rose shook her head sadly.
He fingered a spot on her neck just above the collar of her shirt. She remembered from their weeks together, so long ago, that he'd always favored kissing that spot on her neck. "I made love to you this morning."
She shook her head again.
He ignored her. "You told me to pick out a jacket so I went into your closet and brought out a brown one. You said you'd never seen it before and it didn't match your outfit anyway. So I suggested you change outfits. 'To what?' you asked. And so I cobbled together that outfit together for you and the TARDIS brought out pink Chucks." His lips twitched towards a smile before curling down. His eyes seemed a bit more moist than normal. "You laughed and laughed when you realized what I'd done but you put it on anyway."
Rose looked at her wardrobe thoughtfully then leaned down and pulled her shoes off. She walked over to the wardrobe and, kneeling down, rummaged through the shoes she had down there. It took her a second to locate the bright pink converse underneath her other shoes. She kept her back to him as she wrestled them onto her feet without untying them. They were really loose so it wasn't quite as difficult as it should've been. When she was done she stood up and turned, wiggling her feet around for him to see.
The Doctor tried to smile and only managed to look slightly less miserable.
She took a step towards him and he reached out, pulling her across the remaining two feet to the edge of the bed, to stand between his legs. He leaned forward and pressed his face into her stomach. She sighed quietly, running her fingers through his hair.
He croaked something she couldn't make out.
"What?"
He raised his head. "Ninety-four minutes," he murmured. The Doctor slid his arms up her body as he stood, and pulled her tightly against him. "That's how long it's been. Ninety-four minutes and thirty-eight seconds ago, I told you to stay in the lab and you told me to be careful. And now here you are, a year and a half later. You've grown up. You've changed. You're not the same woman I woke up this morning with." She still didn't say anything so he went on. "And I don't know who you are anymore. I don't know the woman you've become and I'll never know what you went through to get to where you are now."
"I could tell you," she whispered.
"And I could tell you about all my past lives but it wouldn't be the same as if you'd lived through them with me."
He had a point. "You're right." She framed his face with her hands. "You're right; I'm not that same person. But I'm still Rose. And I still love you."
He tried to smile again, failed. "Oh, Rose…I never doubted that. Not for a second. But I—I'm so old and your life is going to end long before mine. I've only got a short time with you before you're gone and he—he took…he took some of that from me. He stole a year and a half of your life from me and no matter what, I can never get it back." He turned his head and kissed the palm of her right hand, reaching up to cradle her hand with his. "How many times were you hurt because I wasn't there to help you? How many times did you wake up from nightmares because I wasn't there to keep them away?"
Too often, she thought but he didn't need to know. She hadn't expected him to react this way. She'd expected anger, sadness, and him to try and comfort her. But he was mourning.
The Doctor closed the remaining distance between them and kissed her tenderly. Lips sliding together, her hand stroking his temple, and she felt his mind brush against hers. He used to do that, she remembered, but she'd never been this aware of it before.
It was that thought that caused her to pull away. If he got too close to her mind he might see too much too soon. She had to break this to him carefully. "Doctor, there's something I need to tell you."
"I suspected as much."
She looked down, suddenly unable to meet his eyes any longer. How was she supposed to ease him into something like this?
"What is it?"
"It's the TARDIS," she mumbled.
He stilled. She wasn't even sure he was still breathing.
"Can you feel her?"
"Yes," he said slowly. "But it's strange."
"Like she's not entirely there?"
"Mmhmm."
"Anything else?"
The Doctor shook his head. "What's going on, Rose?"
"The Master did something to the TARDIS. I'm not sure what, but…it was…it was…" She trailed off with a shudder as she recalled the pain. The Doctor sat down on the bed, tugging her with him, and she scooted back against the wall, pulling her knees to her chest. He followed her, leaning against the wall, and sat with his legs outstretched. "At first, the Master would take trips in the TARDIS. I couldn't be sure, but it felt like he was going the same distance each time."
"He was. I locked the coordinates as you were dematerializing. He can only travel between the Earth here and now and the year one hundred trillion."
She nodded slowly. "He went a bunch of times at the beginning. Dunno why. Then the trips got fewer and farther in between. Then there was this one day, I remember, a whole bunch of trips. One after the other, back and forth, and back and forth, it was horrible. I got so sick. Then after that day there were a few more and then they stopped."
"And then what happened?"
Rose licked her lips slowly. "Pain. At first it was just…little phantom pains all over my body. Nowhere particular. They weren't that bad at first. But then they just…got worse. They'd come out of nowhere an' sometimes I'd be totally incapacitated. I started blacking out, too. Sometimes I'd wake up and no time had passed. Another time I didn't wake up for over an hour. That one was the worst. Woke up in hospital." She swallowed and licked her lips again. "That was November. And then one day, just before Christmas, it—it was—it hurt so bad. Like nothing in my life. It was like I was being ripped open and eaten from the inside out. And the TARDIS was screaming in my head. I was so scared.
"I remember hearin' Owen say I was gonna die from the stress on my body. And then I thought about you, and how I wasn't ever gonna see you again. Then that's where things get fuzzy. I remember the singing and all this golden light and so much in my mind. But I still to this day can't tell you what I did during that time. Next thing I knew, I was waking up and I felt fine. Completely fine. But my bond to the TARDIS was… it went from a steel pole to a shoelace and I couldn't feel her on the other end. She must've weakened it to save me."
When she was finished, Rose glanced at the Doctor. He had his eyes shut and his jaw was tight. He breathed slowly, deeply, like he was asleep. He said nothing for a long time. Rose stared at herself in the mirror across the room. She'd done that many times since she'd moved in here. It helped her to drift and think. Seeing the Doctor's reflection next to hers, however, warmed her heart. Another reminder that he was really here. They were finally together.
"I can feel the TARDIS." The Doctor said. "She's there but her presence is weak. She won't respond." He opened his eyes and looked at her reflection in the mirror. "You said you can't feel her anymore?"
"No. I can't even feel the bond unless I go looking for it. It's so small. And I can't hear her singing anymore. Not even when I—y'know. 'Cos when we went into that secret underground base Torchwood One had, the one with the Huons, we activated some of them. My eyes glowed, I felt all tingly, but there was no song. She's just gone—"
"Silent," he finished. "This has only ever happened twice. Both times she was too focused on some other task. If the last thing you felt from her was pain then that can only mean she's been damaged. Torn apart, perhaps, but she's still alive."
"It was the Master's fault. I know that much."
He exhaled through slowly through his teeth. "First you. Now the TARDIS. And we still don't even know what his plan is."
"Nor us." she sighed. "And we've been trying for over a year."
The Doctor was silent for another minute. Then he reached over and stroked her bare forearm with the tips of his fingers, slowly, cautiously, like he was afraid she would run from him. She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. She wanted to tell him the rest but she was afraid to overwhelm him. So much had happened for him in the last few hours. She'd had months and months get used to these things. Time Lord or not, he needed a chance to process everything he'd learned today before she piled on all the stuff going on with her.
He tilted his head down to look into her eyes. "I love you," he murmured.
Tears welled in her eyes and she giggled once. She'd been waiting months to hear him say those three words again. And they still caused her heart to flutter in her chest, her tummy to tingle, and made her want to jump around and shout gleefully to the sky.
"Say it again."
He smiled. "I love you, Rose Tyler."
She giggled again, trying to blink away the tears, but one of them escaped and dripped down her cheek. The Doctor twisted, folding his legs, out to the side. He wiped the tears away with his thumbs and smiled. He searched her face intently for a moment, rubbing this thumb across the apple of her cheek. "Are you alright?" he asked.
Rose didn't have to think about it because for the first time in a long time, she really, truly was.
Ok I know you all have 10,000 questions. A handful of them will be fully answered in the coming chapters. Some of them will be answered, but not in depth. And some probably won't be answered at all. I saw this coming a long time ago and I planned for it. There's gonna be a side story that I will begin posting once the main story is finished called "With Starlight in Her Eyes" which is a crossover with Torchwood. I was gonna work on it for NaNo but stuff happened. I currently have 5 chapters written so far. Kazz made a cover for it so keep an eye on tumblr for it. It'll be in the WSITW tag for sure later.
WSIHE will detail Rose's life over the 18 months that passed. It's not going to be as long as WSITW (omfg nowhere near) and it's not going to go into detail with every single episode. But it will cover from the time she escaped the Master all the way until Jack runs off to the TARDIS pre-Utopia. So you'll be able to see those eighteen months and understand what she went through to get to where she is now.
And that's an opportunity the Doctor isn't going to get so you better appreciate it.
Unfortunately, since I won't be rewriting every episode of the show, in order to fully appreciate and understand the story, you're probably going to need to have at least season 1 of Torchwood under your belt.
