A/N: Yeah, that last chapter was evil. I have been working my tail off on this to get it perfected. I don't think you guys will be disappointed. Also, for those of you who might not have seen/heard yet, Rockerbabe and I have collaborated on our first serious fic ever, called "The Open Door" by Rockerbabe and Destany Mitchell…or maybe it's the other way around? It's a Jommy fic using songs only from Evanescence's The Open Door CD. It's like, each song is a chapter, dealing with various degrees of Jommy life. The fic rocks…but I'm biased. I think you guys will like it. I haven't seen too many do what we're doing with it, so I'm interested in seeing what you guys think. How we've structured it is I write even songs, she writes the odd songs. We have two chapters up so be sure to check it out if you're looking for a good read or whatever. Anywho! Onto the real reason you're all here (Just had to pimp the collaboration fic!!!)
Chapter 47
Sadie and Kwest moved to sit down on either side of me. Sadie kept an arm around me and Kwest just sat wordlessly next to me, offering me silent support. When the doors opened, I felt my heart leap into my throat, and then sink to my feet. The middle-aged female doctor entered the room with a grim look in her eyes. "No." I whispered, tears falling down my face.
"You're all here for Thomas Quincy?"
"Yeah." Kwest said and Sadie took my hand and squeezed it.
"H-how is he?" I managed to squeak out. From the doctor's expression, it wasn't good and I was fearing the worst.
"I've got good news and bad news."
"Good news first, please." Sadie stated without a moment of hesitation. The doctor nodded and sighed.
"He made it through the surgery."
I released the breath I didn't know I was holding with a loud whoosh. He's alive. I thought and felt a small smile creep its way across my face.
"The bad news?" Kwest asked and the doctor sighed and closed the file in her hands and I felt my smile vanish.
"I'm not going to lie to you." She stated bluntly. "Mr. Quincy lost a lot of blood, we almost lost him a few times." I tightened my grip on Sadie's hand and she squeezed mine gently in return. "The next 48 hours are going to be critical. Bearing no complications, he should make a full recovery."
"The knife didn't cause too much damage?" Kwest asked.
"On the contrary, it went through quite a bit of muscle. He'll need physical therapy once it's healed." Kwest nodded and the doctor looked between us. "Any other questions?"
"Can we see him?" I asked, my voice sounding small and broken, not at all like me.
"Family only." I felt my heart sink.
"His only living relatives live in Montana," Kwest stated. "We're his family." The doctor didn't say anything, just looked back and forth between us. Kwest wrapped an arm around me. "She's his fiancé." I managed to keep my objection to myself. I hoped I didn't look too surprised, but the mess I was in, there was no idea what was showing across my face. I was confused, worried, exhausted, scared, and relieved all at the same time. The only thing I wanted to do, was to see Tommy. She looked at me, a frown on her face, her eyes narrowed. She didn't look like she believed me but she sighed and shook her head and sighed.
"I'll have a nurse come get you when we're ready."
"Thank you," I managed to say and she left, glancing doubtfully at me. I turned to look at Kwest once the door was shut. "Thanks."
Kwest smiled at me and pulled me closer, more of a half hug. "You're welcome." He said, and I pulled back a bit. "Besides, Tom would want to see you. He'd kick my ass if I didn't lie for you."
I chuckled slightly and felt a real smile come across my face. The door opened and a nurse came in with a clipboard with a bunch of papers on it.
"I need someone to fill these out." She said, looking between us. Kwest got up and took the clipboard from the woman. She gave him different instructions and Kwest sat back down with the forms and began carefully reading them over and filling them out.
"Are you ok?" Sadie asked me, reaching up and stroking my hair. I nodded and sniffed.
"I will be." I told her and Sadie nodded. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "Does Darius and everyone else know?" I asked, opening my eyes again. By the look on Sadie's face, I'd take it as a no.
"Don't worry about that Jude, ok? I'll call Darius and let him know about Tommy." I nodded and closed my eyes again, feeling anticipation rising within me. I wanted to see Tommy. I needed to see him to reassure myself that he was ok and was going to make it through this. I heard Sadie get up and leave the room and I was thankful for the moment alone to gather my thoughts. I had to concentrate on taking deep breaths. I was about to fall apart at the seams and I don't know what to do or how to keep myself from falling apart. I could feel my body shaking slightly from exhaustion but mentally, my mind was racing. Too much had happened in the last couple hours and I wasn't even sure if I could process everything. It was too much. Has been too much. Just the thought of Damien and…
I shuddered, my stomach churning. Don't think about that Jude. Don't think about him. I told myself. I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. What was taking so long? I wondered. All I wanted was to see Tommy. I didn't care if – my thoughts were broken off when the door opened and a nurse stepped in. I leaped out of my chair, nearly knocking it over and rushing over to the door. The woman blinked at me and then smiled kindly. I recognized her as the same nurse who had been there when I first arrived.
"How bad is he?" I asked Nurse Kim as she led me through the halls and towards the elevator. She was silent a moment as we walked and I wondered if she would tell me anything.
"You ever see the medical dramas? When the patient is brought in near death?" I nodded my head and felt my heart drop. "He looks worst." She stated, giving me a sympathetic smile.
"Is it that bad?" I asked her, feeling tears whell up in my eyes again.
"He's lost a lot of blood," She told me, her voice soft and sympathetic but matter of fact at the same time. "He's going to be weak for a while. We can't shock his body by raising his blood levels all at once; it'd do more harm than good. We have to gradually increase it and even then, the danger lies in if he comes down with an infection."
I nodded, knowing enough about medicine to know that when the body was weak enough, a simple case of the sniffles could be deadly.
"He's hooked up to a couple different machines to keep track of his vitals and let us know if he's doing worst. I'm not going to lie to you, Jude, he should be in ICU, but the staff feels he'd be better in a private room because of his status." I nodded and was thankful for the woman's kind yet matter-of-fact tones. It seemed harsh, but I appreciated the sugar-coated-facts. "He's honestly, going to look a lost worst than he is."
"Thank you." I whispered, a lump forming in my throat, making it hard to talk.
"No, Jude." She told me, and I looked at her, a puzzled look on my face. "Thank yourself. He's alive because of you."
I just stared at Kim, unable to say anything. She just gave me a friendly smile and led me to Tommy's room. She stopped just outside of it and motioned for me to go in.
"Kim, I really can't thank you enough"
"Don't thank me yet, Jude. He's still got a long recovery." She told me and I gave her a smile. For some reason, I felt better knowing that Kim was going to be watching over us.
Kim turned away and went back down the hall where we came from. I took a deep breath and turned to the door and stared at it a long moment, working up the courage to walk in.
I carefully opened the door and stepped into the room, letting the door close behind me with a gentle click. My eyes fell on the figure on the bed and I felt tears spring to them. He was paler than the sheets he was laying on and hooked up to so many machines and none of them made any sense to me. I felt a few stray tears that had escaped my eyes and fallen down my cheeks. I sniffled and walked over to the bed and pulled up, what I knew to be, an extremely uncomfortable chair and sat down next to Tommy.
My eyes didn't leave his face, his dark brown hair a startling contrast to the paleness of his complexion. If it wasn't for the hospital machines and the utter paleness of his features, it looked as if he was sleeping peacefully and hadn't just been stabbed by a knife. I felt a sob wheal up in my throat again and more tears continued to fall down my face. I reached up with a trembling hand and brushed some stray hairs off his forehead, his skin oddly cold and pasty to the touch. The sob that was in my throat escaped and my hand went up and covered my mouth, as if I was afraid that I'd wake him up. This was my fault. I thought, shaking my head as tears fell down my face. He wouldn't be here if I would have been smarter or somehow alerted him faster. Something…anything could have been done differently and we wouldn't be here right now.
"Tommy I-I'm s-s-so s-s-orr-y," I managed to choke out between sobs. I reached down and grabbed his hand gently, caressing the skin on top of his hand where the IV was stuck in, tears falling freely down my face. "I-I love you," I said, sniffling and taking a deep breath to pull myself together. "I can't…I can't get through this without you. You have to fight, Tommy. Fight to stay with me just one last time." I lifted his hand slightly and bent down and kissed the top of it, tears falling freely from my closed eyes. I pulled back with a sniff, and opened my eyes again, looking up to his face to see if he expressed any recognition that I had spoken, my heart sinking to my feet when he still hadn't stirred. I shook my head and closed my eyes. "I know that it's hard, Tommy." I squeezed his hand slightly, careful not to do it hard, but enough to have the pressure be recognizable. "But you've got to wake up, for me."
"J-J-ude…"
My eyes widened and I looked up to see Tommy's eyelids fluttering. I felt a sob rise within my chest. His voice sounded so weak and slightly slurred, but was music to my ears.
"I'm here, Tommy." I said, sniffling and reaching up to brush his hair. I watched his eyes as he slowly fluttered his eyes open into slits and look over at me. "Hey," I managed to say through my tears, sliding my hand down to cup his cheek. His eyes slipped close and he leaned into my hand slightly and I felt a small smile come across my lips. "How're you feeling?" I asked him. He didn't respond for a moment and I thought he had fallen back asleep. I felt my heart sink a bit in disappointment.
"Tired." He responded, his eyes slipping open a bit with slightly more difficulty than they had before. He turned his head to look at me and he tried to smile, but it came off very lazy and not completely there. "B-bea…pwerrrty." He managed to get out, his eyes slipping closed before he forced them open again, his eyelids fluttering.
"I'm not beautiful right now," I told him, caressing his cheek. I knew what he was trying to say, and it warmed my heart to hear that he thought I was beautiful, but right now, I think that would be called into question.
"You….angel." He argued and I felt a smile come over my face.
"That's sweet." I said, bending down to kiss his pale cheek. When I straightened again, his eyes were closed again and I knew he was asleep once again. I felt relief wash over me to know that he was relatively ok. A bit loopy and weak, but otherwise, he seemed OK.
I stayed standing beside his bed for a long moment, just watching him sleep and reveling in the knowledge that he's relatively ok. I glanced at the clock on the wall, noting it was nearing three in the morning. I looked back at Tommy and realized that I couldn't bring myself to leave him. I didn't want him to be alone in the cold, sterile, hospital with no one else around. When I was sick, he had stayed with me the whole time and I had appreciated it. I knew how it felt to wake up and see the love of my life in the bed next to me and know that he was there and everything would be ok.
I glanced towards the closed door to see if anyone was coming and toed off my shoes and set them out of the way before walking back over to the bed and climbing in next to Tommy, careful not to lay on any of the wires or pull something. I situated us a bit before laying my head on his chest and closing my eyes when I heard something. I frowned and opened my eyes and looked up at Tommy. His eyes were still closed, but I felt his hand wrap lazily around me.
"What did you say Babe?" I asked.
"Hide…salami?"
I resisted the urge to reach up and slap him and just rolled my eyes. He was just stabbed with a knife and was, most likely, high on pain meds and he makes a pass at me. I love him to death, but seriously. This was the wrong time.
"Go to sleep." I told him, softly yet firm at the same time.
"Love you." He slurred out and I smiled, laying my head back down on his chest.
"I love you too, Tommy," I said before closing my eyes and falling into a blissful sleep.
