Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all.

Rated M for several reasons.

Chpt 51 The Other Shoe

JPOV

I am, flabbergasted.

There's a nice old fashioned word.

Part of my mind is following what Carlisle's saying, filing it away for later and worrying fretfully about why the rest of it has abruptly ceased transmission. It's a little disconcerting to say the least but gradually it struggles its way back to consciousness and discovers me still sitting, statue like, in one of Carlisle's chairs.

I've been claimed.

How odd.

Not more than a few minutes ago I was fretting that the woman I love would be incensed by the idea that I'd claimed her like an animal, put my mark on her neck and bound us irrevocably together forever. Now I'm almost trembling with outraged male pride in the knowledge that she actually did it to me.

I can't fucking believe it.

What's happened to free will? Where's my say in this? What am I, a fucking accessory? No small dog to put in your purse? Get a Jasper! They don't need feeding and never soil your hand stitched designer lining.

"You would never have bitten her if it wasn't what you wanted on an instinctual level." Carlisle's voice is calm and measured. "As I said, vampires commit to pair."

"Are you a fucking mind reader now too?" I snap.

"No. I'm a man, I can guess what you're thinking."

I suppose . . . .

"How could I have chosen if I don't remember?" I don't want to be snarling at Carlisle but I can't seem to stop myself.

"Jasper, did you love her before this happened?"

"Yes." I don't even need to think about, I know did, I just didn't have a word for it then.

"So?" He asks, tilting his head to one side.

So? So?

I can't deny, the idea of being permanently connected to Bella fills me with elation. There's nothing else I would have asked for.

But I thought I loved Maria, Alice, what if this is just a fleeting thing too? What if, when the first flush of love wears off, I don't want to be with Bella anymore yet I don't have a choice?

Argh! I need to fucking destroy something!

Several trees and a large glacial deposit later I've worked off some of my excess energy, temporarily parked my wounded male pride, and am at least able to think about some of the other stuff Carlisle was telling me.

I've been claimed.

Mated pairs are very close, the physical pain and elastic is a manifestation of our desire to be together. I suppose that explains why it's less painful today, in New York I hadn't wanted to leave her bed to traipse downstairs and make nice with an inconsequential human, today I know she's happy, on a shopping trip with Kate and Esme.

Which isn't to say that I don't miss her.

The scent thing appeals to the animal in me, I can't deny. Carlisle says he thinks she will smell like me to all other males, the ones who know me will recognise and respect our connection and the ones that don't will simply be instinctively wary of a female carrying such a strong male scent. Good, because she's mine and they need to be extremely fucking wary.

Our being able to feel each other explains a lot too. I'd assumed that the 'weirdness' had just made her shield immune to my gift, but I knew it wasn't quite the same. When I read people's emotions it almost visual, like a paint chart, but the way I'm feeling Bella . . . . It's different. I feel her, not as a series of color snatches, as an extension of me, like smoke curling around my soul, her emotions are almost secondary. I'd dismissed it as the intensity of being able to feel her the first time we made love, but I should have known better when she lost control of her shield, I just didn't think, it felt so natural . . . .

I've got questions but Carlisle says he still has research to do, so I guess they'll have to wait. Will it get stronger, this connection between us? Is there more to come or is it done now? Does this mean I have to do what I'm told for all eternity? What if she doesn't want to be with me one day, can she un-mate me?

My balls contract.

I don't like that idea, I don't like it at all . . . .

Does she even know? How could she? She doesn't remember anything either and how could she have possibly known mating was even an option? She's sweetly clueless about almost everything vampire related and even I had no idea it was even possible.

Instinct.

Somewhere deep inside her, something knew, something recognised me. Wanted me. Despite everything.

Hadn't I already surrendered? Wasn't I already a gooey mass of pathetically yearning hope? Wouldn't I have already done anything and everything to make her happy?

If she said the words, offered me her tiny hand, wouldn't I have taken it and just said yes?

Does it matter that it was her choice or does that just prove that she loves me and she wants me? How else would she have ever been able to make an emphatic statement like that? How many vampires could know beyond a shadow of a doubt that their mate wanted them, and only them? And if it had have been a masculine thing, as I would have assumed, wouldn't I have wanted to do it by now, if I'd known it was possible?

Of course she's hardly taken the time to investigate the alternatives. Not that she'd ever find a mate more worthy than me who could love her and cherish her more than I am going to.

Instinctual, Chemical, Biological, Spiritual.

I've been claimed.

For the first time in an hour or so I break into a grin.

I've been claimed and I think I might learn to like it.

Fuck, Pete had better not find out the finer points of how it works, my fucking eternity won't be worth living . . . .

Shit, there won't be any hiding it from Em . . . . Or Rose . . . .

We need to start looking for a place of our own, somewhere really, really, remote . . . . Possibly with a drawbridge and some vats of boiling oil . . . .

Fuck. How could she emasculate me like this? I thought she loved me.

Alright. I'm being a dick, but shit, this is going to take a hell of a lot of getting used to . . . .

I'm still mulling it all over when I scent Carlisle approaching.

He stops at the top of the rise surveying me, squatting in the center of the devastation, with well hidden amusement.

"Kate's just texted me. There are scents of unknown vampires in town, they're coming home, just to be on the safe side."

Immediately I surge to my feet. I know that vampires don't fight nearly as much as my own history would suggest, for the most part we just tread carefully around each other, showing each other the respect we deserve as vicious and often unpredictable predators. Nevertheless I think I'll just head out that way and see them home, for my own peace of mind.

"Are you coming?" I ask Carlisle as I move past him toward town.

"Yes." He answers simply, falling into step beside me as I break into a run. "Kate didn't say how many, might as well see who is crossing our territory."

I can't help but laugh, I may be the one with the physical connection but he's got his own protective streak where Esme and the family are concerned, it's just not the sort of thing we men tend to admit to out loud.

Jesus, what a day.

At least I'll get to see Bella again sooner than I thought.

"So how are you feeling?" He asks as we breeze past the house.

"Conflicted."

He chuckles but doesn't respond, there isn't really a lot he can say, is there?

BPOV

I've barely closed the door before we're pulling away and Kate starts, I knew she was too nice up in Jasper's room.

"So, what kind of bed do you want?"

Esme chuckles.

Oh god.

"Just something I can read on, I prefer it to a chair."

"Hmm." She muses. "You've more experience in these things Esme but surely it would have to be pretty sturdy to withstand all the reading Bella and Jasper will be doing on it?"

"Don't worry Bella." Esme responds, winking at me in the mirror. "I know just the thing."

I groan inwardly, it's too late to regret giving in to Jasper's advances now and it isn't as bad as I expected, nobody seems to mind except me.

"Actually Bella." Esme continues, cooling my embarrassment even more. "I think you should get a full set of bedroom furniture, start fresh, you'll need your own closet too."

"I haven't got many clothes." I point out.

"You'll accumulate them over the years." She says with a laugh. "Even I do and I have very simple tastes compared to the others. Besides Jasper's OCD about his wardrobe space, military background I suspect, it used to drive Alice demented. Save yourself the grief, get one of your own."

"I don't know where we'll put it all." I mumble, worried about the cost and that fact that this isn't my home. "There's no wall space."

"You could always re-model, its Esme's speciality." Kate interjects.

"No." Definitely not. "I like Jasper's room the way it is."

"I thought you might." Esme says easily. "But it's your room too, let's at least put some more furniture in it?"

"Okay." I sigh, surprised to find that I'm more warmed than alarmed by everyone's assumption that I belong here.

The rest of the drive passes in idle chatter.

"Jasper asked me to bring him back a present." I admit as we pull into the parking lot of the local mall.

Esme starts to open her mouth but Kate beats her to it.

"Allow me Esme." She says haughtily. "You may be queen of interior décor but I know exactly what kind of present Jasper will appreciate."

Esme giggles and I look down to inspect my denim clad knees. I fear I know exactly what she means almost as much as I fear the fact that I think it's a good idea . . . .

We pile out of the car and automatically scent the air.

Vampires.

"Oh dear." Esme mutters.

"At least six." Kate observes, eyes darting everywhere at once. "Anyone you know?"

Esme shakes her head and I shiver slightly, the low ache of my connection to Jasper suddenly throbbing with dull pain, I wish he was here.

"It's probably just a coven of nomads passing through but we should probably head home." Kate observes and Esme nods sending my anxiety soaring. When am I ever going to get used to meeting other vampires?

"Don't worry Bella." Esme assures me, noticing my alarm. "We're just being cautious. Besides Carlisle is our coven leader and if any meeting and greeting needs to be done it should be done by him."

I nod and climb back into the car with them, Kate smiling at me sympathetically.

"So then." Esme decides as she starts the car and backs out of the parking space. "Now I'm being temporarily deprived of one of my favourite pastimes I've no alternative but to quiz you instead."

I roll my eyes, apprehensive enough of talking about myself to forget the 'stranger danger'.

She laughs.

"When did you first decide that my son might not be a completely irredeemable asshole?"

I manage to loyally bite back a laugh of my own and for a minute I watch the urban scene outside slide back into dense forest. Might as well get it over and done with.

"He pushed me out of an airplane . . . ."

Kate explodes into peals of laughter and Esme joins in.

"Oh Bella." Kate gasps. "I knew you'd be interestingly weird the moment I met you . . . ."

The laughter is cut short as something slams into the back of the car, flipping it up into the air and sending it sailing across the treetops like a well flung shoe.

We scream, it's not like we're going to be injured, but it's got to be done.

The flight, although short, seems to go on forever but like everything gravity eventually pulls us back to earth. Upside down, with the bottom of the car pressed around our bodies like a Jell-O mold.

"Is everyone alright?" Esme rasps.

"Yes." I reply.

"Kate?" Esme demands.

There's an answering screech of metal.

"Ew, ugh." Kate wheezes. "Sorry, metal face pack."

The three of us release a collective sigh of relief and then, as one, start fighting our way free of the suffocating cocoon. It's not as easy as you might think, even super strength needs room to work. I don't like it, it's like being trapped in a pliable metal womb, senses cut off. I need out . . . .

The car flips up, abruptly righting itself and the roof is ripped away with a rending screech.

"He's not in here." A familiar voice snarls as hands reach in to pry us loose.