Just a Little Push

Part 46

You know what was stupid?

...Well, lots of things in the world were stupid. Potatoes were stupid for one. And French perverts. And most of the girls at her school. And, of course, little sisters who didn't understand the stupidity of potato bastards. And annoying tomato idiots...

And lots of things. The world was practically filled to the brim with stupid things. It was a wonder that there were any smart people left.

Anyway, that wasn't the point.

The point was that canoes were stupid. Canoes were really really stupid.

You know why canoes are stupid? Because they're almost impossible to steer. And in order to move around, you have to paddle really hard and it gets super tiring after a while. Particularly if you're in a canoe with a bunch of idiots who have no clue what they're doing. And then there's the risk that said idiots will tip you over...

You know, going to the hospital sucked...a lot. And a hospital was up there on the list of top ten worst places to propose to your girlfriend, too. But at this exact moment, Lovi was starting to feel a little happy about the fact that she'd spent some time in the hospital. Because she now had a ready-made excuse for why there was no fucking way she was getting in that boat.

"But, Lovi~"

No matter how much a certain tomato bastard whined.

Said tomato bastard was currently standing right in front of her, pouting like a little kid who'd just been told that he couldn't have his dessert until after dinner. "Mr. Roma said that you could come and play with us if you were careful. You should come! You haven't gotten to play any of the games this entire week!"

Her nonno was such a traitor. And why was it a problem that she hadn't been able to play the stupid games? Lovina really had no desire to run around and get all sweaty—or in this case wet.

She'd much rather sit on the dry shore with her grandfather and the potato-grandfather (who was slightly less annoying than his potato-grandchildren, but only slightly), watching as everyone else made fools of themselves. That was a much more enjoyable way to spend her afternoon.

She snorted, crossing her arms over her chest and fixing her...fiancé ...with her best glare. "And I'd probably end up falling into the lake again, bastard. And cracking my head open. Again."

Antonio was pouting at her. And that look wasn't at all endearing. Not at all.

"But, Lovi~. You don't have to worry! I'll protect you!" And his sneaky bastard of a hand had managed to find her hand and now his fingers were intertwined with hers.

But it'd be way too much work to push him away, so...

"Hello, Lovina and Antonio, da ze~!"

Lovina had another thing to add to her list of stupid things in the world. People who suddenly popped up out of nowhere and almost gave you heart attacks? They were also incredibly stupid.

"Ah... Hola, Yong Soo..." And Antonio, of course, still managed to be his ridiculously polite, friendly self even after having the bejeezus scared out of him by the insane Korean.

"I finally found you a present, da ze~!"

...Like she said, insane Korean.

Antonio looked even more confused than usual, which was really saying something. Although she was pretty confused too. "Present?"

"It originated in Korea!"

And a package was suddenly shoved right into Antonio's arms before he had time to respond; he had to let go of her hands to keep from dropping the stupid thing. A package that had been wrapped in what looked like sketch paper...

"I had to borrow Kiku's paper to wrap it, da ze~!" Yong Soo just continued talking, apparently not noticing their complete confusion.

"Uh..." Antonio was staring at the gift like he wasn't entirely sure what to do with it. "Gracias, but why are you—"

"Yong Soo, we're about to start, aru!"

And he was gone before Antonio could even finish his question; running toward his teammates as if a bull was chasing him. "I'm coming, da ze~!"

Leaving the two of them standing there, staring after him...

"Ah..." And Antonio was the first to speak, of course. He paused for a moment, as if unsure what he should say right now, but then he glanced toward her and smiled. "Well, that was nice of Yong Soo."

She just frowned in response and crossed her arms over her chest. "What the fuck was that for?" Seriously, she'd known that Yong Soo was playing with a few cards short of a full deck, but she hadn't realised he was this insane.

"Maybe he just wanted to be nice!"

A snort. "More likely that he wants something."

And Antonio looked like he was about to respond to that, but thankfully she was saved from his too nice words and big, innocently-wide eyes by her nonno's sudden booming voice. Well, sort of thankfully. It was hard to decide who was more annoying sometimes, especially when...wait, who in the world had given her grandfather a megaphone?

"Everybody ready for the canoe race?" Mr. Beilschmidt looked like he was wondering the same thing, as he stood beside Nonno with a very pained expression.

Not that Nonno cared. "All right, everybody! Now for the rules! As you can see, each of our canoes hold four people. Two of you will be paddling at a time. Your task is to follow the trail of orange buoys that we've set up until you reach the white and red buoy near the centre of the lake. At that point, you will be required to switch places in the canoe to give your teammates a chance to paddle! Careful not to tip over!" He grinned at the worried expressions that crossed quite a few faces. "Don't worry. These canoes are very difficult to tip over! You'd practically have to try to tip one of these babies over!"

Lovi bet that one of these idiots would be able to manage it.

"Each team will have two canoes—one waiting until the other has finished the course. Just like a relay race! Now, we'll be giving you guys about a half an hour to strategise and practice in the canoes! We have enough so that every pair will be able to have their own canoe! So have fun!"

And he seemed to have finished. Which apparently was the signal to unleash chaos.

"The hero gets the first canoe!"

"No way! Awesome gets the first canoe!"

"Um, there are plenty of canoes, Gilli-ch..."

"No, that one's mine!" Ally and Gill were currently engaged in their favourite pastime. Fighting over stupid shit.

God, those two were almost as annoying as the potato bastard. And speaking of whom... oh, he had better not be getting into a canoe with her stupid little sister...

And he totally was. Feli was bouncing around like a spastic little pinball (wearing a bright yellow lifejacket; at least the potato bastard had made sure that she didn't forget that) in her excitement. Annoying little idiot sister.

Lovina could just imagine it now. The potato bastard would paddle her out to the middle of the lake and then Feli would be trapped. Who knew what the bastard would do to her out there?

"Lovi?" And she jumped slightly at the voice coming from much-too-close to her ear. She'd almost forgotten that Antonio was still standing beside her. "Are you sure that you don't want to go canoeing with me? We could always go canoeing now, even if you don't want to race."

And she made a very stupid mistake right here, as she actually turned toward him and looked up into his so-fucking-hopeful emerald green eyes.

Oh, God. Why was he so fucking gorgeous? This was so not fair.

"I—" She could feel her face turning that obnoxious shade of red that always reminded the idiot of the tomatoes that he was obsessed with—rightly so, but that wasn't the point. "I—"

Wait.

If she went out with Antonio in that canoe, then not only would she be all alone in a tiny space with her insanely sexy fiancé—she had not just thought that—but she would actually be able to keep a close eye on her sister and be in the perfect position to shove the potato bastard overboard if he tried anything with her.

And Antonio was still staring at her with those evil, evil eyes.

"Fine." She threw her head to the side with a huff, ignoring the overjoyed expression that passed over his face at her words. That expression did not send butterflies flitting around her stomach. It must have been something she ate. "Just make sure that you get us one that doesn't leak. And if it capsizes, you are dead meat."

"I won't let it capsize, Lovi! I promise." He was beaming. And then, before she could respond, he suddenly leaned in and kissed the tip of her nose. A little peck and then he'd hurried off toward the canoes that were being divvied up on the shore.

And Lovi just stood there for a moment, too surprised to move... Before a bright red flush began to devour her cheeks.

Stupid idiot. Stupid stupid idiot fiancé bastard. Idiot.


A/N: I'm back! :D Yay! Life has sort of settled down for me, thankfully. So yeah, updates should go back to something at least close to normal. And review lots if you want? Reviews make me very very happy. :)

And we finally get to the canoeing part! Canoeing is actually one of those things that I'm sort of good at, so I can better go off of experience here. Except I haven't gotten to actually do it since high school. Sigh... I have a tendency to be decent at all of the sports that you can't just go out and do, you gotta go to specific places to do it and get all the equipment and stuff. Like canoeing, kayaking, archery, rollerblading.

And, I already posted this in the authoress notes to the new R&R chappy, but I haven't gotten many reviews for that so not sure how many people saw it. I recently went through and created a list of the character ages for the Pleasantville series. It can be found here:

theauthoress13 . livejournal . com / 34322 . html