Chapter 55: Family Time
"Daughter?"
Ana looked up, not entirely sure what to say, on one hand, she was happy…after…after everything that had happened. Mother… here, and she was not angry at her. Well, no more angry with her than she had been normally.
The Inquisitor shook her head.
How many times had she tried to write her mother? How many times had she tried, and failed, to put what she had experienced into words? Far too many to be sure, but now…now…
…She realized that words had not been necessary, they were no substitute for tears and a simple embrace.
She sniffled slightly, wiping idly at her eyes.
"Yes, Mother?" she asked.
Lady Aliza had removed a small canister from her cloak, a canister she was now rubbing under her eyes. Ana recognized it of course, a balm used to help get rid of the redness that came with tears. Mother never left home without at least one canister of the stuff.
She had never figured that she would see mother use it after tears of joy, at least she thought they were tears of joy.
They had spent the last few moments eating in silence, breaking their fast without saying really anything.
Now, it seemed that her mother was ready to talk.
Ana hoped that she had the right answers.
"You have been quite busy," Lady Aliza began, "This army, this fortress, you have done more than anyone might have expected in such a short time."
The Inquisitor shrugged.
"I've had a lot of help," she replied, "Cassandra, Sister Leliana, Lady Josephine, Cu…"
She blushed slightly, diverting her eyes.
"Co…Commander Cullen, they have all helped get us to this point. The Inquisition has been a success of alliance."
Lady Aliza smiled.
"Modesty is good in a leader, my dear, but you must also acknowledge how much you have done yourself. I have seen the world you have made on my journey here. The Inquisition now controls much of western Ferelden, and is slowly expanding into eastern Orlais."
Her mother chuckled.
"Alliance is all well and good, but it is your name on the lips of the faithful in your new lands. They have come to expect much of you. You must not disappoint them."
Ana sighed.
"I'm trying not to."
The Inquisitor ran her fingers through her hair. She felt those old defenses starting to go up. She remember them so clearly, so many past conversations with her Mother, how she was wasting her talents, and not applying herself to what really mattered.
The girl's eyes narrowed.
She did not wish to go back to that, so much had happened.
Yet, she did not want this to turn into a fight either. She was grateful that Mother was here…
She had no desire to throw away any goodwill she had won by making her mother happy that she was still alive.
She shook her head.
"What we have done here," she began, "The Inquisition I mean, I…the cost, nothing I have ever known could have prepared me for this. Maker knows you did not."
Lady Aliza's eyes narrowed her fork halfway to her mouth.
"Is that a rebuke daughter?"
"It is a regret, Mother," she answered, "I…I never really understood what you sacrificed for us, for our family."
Ana gave her a wan smile.
"I…I have…I have had to make decisions mother, bad ones. I have led men and women into battle, and made choices that have led to their deaths. I went to Redcliffe to try and help the mages, and I saw just how far things would have went had I not been at the Conclave. So many have died for what we are trying to do. Uncle Randolph, the Divine, all the people we lost in Haven. They died because of choices I made."
She put her hand over her mother's.
"You told me once that I did not understand the value of hard choices. That I did not know what it took to try and keep our family together, to keep it safe from our enemies."
She gently squeezed her mother's hand.
"I understand now, and I'm sorry for not telling you how grateful I was, I…I didn't know. I just didn't know."
Aliza sniffled slightly, Ana thought her mother might burst into tears again, but she smiled slightly.
"Perhaps…perhaps I've underestimated you as well," she said, "If what I have seen of the Inquisition is any judge, it is clear that you know more about ruling than I ever gave you credit for. Elizabeth knows these things, but I had to take an open hand in teaching her. you…"
She squeezed her daughter's hand.
"You seem to have gotten the hang of it yourself without my teachings."
The Inquisitor blinked.
"How is Lizzy doing?" she asked, "After left the estate in Orlais, I…I didn't have a chance to explain anything."
Her Mother smiled.
"You're going to be an aunt soon," Lady Aliza said, "Elizabeth and Miles got married, they are expecting their first child."
Ana grinned.
An aunt, she thought, fighting the urge to giggle.
I'm going to be an aunt!
"And I missed the wedding," she said with a hint of regret, "Of course, that might be for the best. Liz…I mean Elizabeth and I did not part on the best of terms."
Her mother pursed her lips.
"You frightened your sister, Anastasia. I asked Elizabeth to bring you home, and she returns not only empty handed but telling me that you were some kind of monster with dark magic boiling out of a wound in your hand."
"I did not mean to frighten Elizabeth," she winced, "I was trying to explain what had happened to me, to be honest, I still do not understand it all myself.
She shook her head again.
"What did Lizzy tell you?"
"She told me that the Inquisition had turned you into some kind of a monster, or that a monster had taken your place. I came here hoping to find out what had happened. Everything that we have seen in Ostwick, everything that my agents have been telling me, it conflicted with what Elizabeth told me."
Lady Aliza straightened her back, she pinned her daughter with a cool even gaze.
"So I ask you now, Anastasia, please, tell me what has happened in your own words."
Ana shook her head.
"It is a fantastic story mother; I would not expect you to believe it all."
The older woman leaned in closer.
"Indulge me, daughter."
The Inquisitor sighed.
"Okay," she said, "But don't say I did not warn you."
Lady Aliza nodded in acceptance.
Ana nodded.
She told her tale.
She hoped that mother would react better than Lizzy did.
IOI
Lady Aliza said nothing as Anastasia told her tale, and when she had finished, she found that she was speechless.
The breach, the Venatori, this…Corypheus creature…
…Her daughter was not wrong she realized.
It was a fantastic story.
"So…that is it?"
"That is it," her daughter answered.
"So…these…Venatori blew up the Conclave, they killed the Divine and your uncle?"
"It certainly looks that way."
Aliza shook her head.
She…she was not sure what to say. What her daughter had told her, it was terrifying to be sure, and Anastasia, the Inquisitor…
She now understood what had scared Elizabeth back in Val Royeaux. Her daughter was different; you could not go through what the girl had and not be changed.
She hated to admit it, but she found herself getting angry again. Angry that Anastasia had not come home when she had the chance, but she was also angry at the Venatori as well…
They had hurt her child, took some of the light from her baby's, her little girl's soul, and turned her into the hard young woman that now sat before her.
She felt so many conflicting emotions right now: pride, fear, and anger chief among them.
Damn this Inquisition she thought, and damn these Venatori too!
"Is there any way to end this peacefully?"
Anastasia blinked.
"This?"
"This war," she clarified, "Is there any way to end this without more bloodshed? Can these…Venatori be reasoned with?"
Her daughter almost laughed at that.
"No, Mother, I doubt very much that the Venatori can be reasoned with. Corypheus wants to be a god. He won't stop until he finds a way into the black city and achieve this goal."
"But that is madness," Aliza gasped.
"I think that is the point, mother. Sometimes it seems that the whole world has gone mad. The Templars, the mages, the Orlesian civil war, it is all madness."
Her daughter shook her head.
"Divine Justinia understood just how bad things had gotten. If the Conclave failed, she was prepared to act. The Inquisition would have been formed with or without me."
Again Anastasia shrugged.
"I never asked for this. I would have been insane to ask for this, but with everything that has happened. I…We…the Inquisition has made a difference, Mother."
It was then that her daughter's expression turned pained.
"More people are going to die, good people, honest people. All I can do…is try to make sure those deaths are not needless, that those sacrifices are not in vain."
"A friend of mine told me not so long ago, that a leader should not be chosen because they are the strongest or the smartest, but because they are willing to make the choices that other people are not comfortable making, that they can make those choices, and live with the consequences."
Again her daughter gave her a wan smile.
"You know what that is like, yes?"
Aliza shook her head, but not in refusal.
"I understand, daughter."
"Good," Anastasia smiled, "Because there is something that you must do for me now. You won't like it, but you must do it for the good of our family."
Aliza felt a cold chill run down her spine.
She…she did not like where this was going.
She did not like it one bit.
"What do you want me to do?"
Again her daughter squeezed her hand; the pressure was warm, and strong.
"What I want is irrelevant. What I need you to do mother, is this. I need you to go back to Ostwick and condemn me. I need you to disown me, and deny that I'm even still your child."
Aliza's eyes widened.
"What?!"
"I know it sounds strange."
"It is more than strange, it is horrifying! You are my child!"
"And I always will be."
"But…"
"But nothing, mother," she said harshly, "The Venatori, they are clever enemies. Eventually they will no doubt try to get to me through you, Andy, or Lizzy. The only way to prevent that is for you to distance yourself from me. As far as anyone must know, you left Skyhold assured that your daughter was gone. You left, and swore to all that will listen that you will never return."
Aliza's head swam.
Surely, surely her daughter did not mean!?"
It…it was beyond…it…it was horrible! It…it…it was…
She almost whimpered.
It was necessary.
Aliza clenched her hands in impotent anger.
"Andreas and Maxwell are here. They came with me. What…what am I going to tell them?"
"Tell them anything," her daughter responded, "Anything that will keep them safe. If a blade is going to fall, I would much rather that you and Lizzy and the rest of the family are kept safe."
Anastasia winced.
"I did not ask for this, and I won't let you die because I've gotten caught up in all this."
Again her daughter sniffled, yet she tried to fight back the tears.
"When the Venatori are defeated, maybe then I can return home, but…not now…"
She shook her head.
"Not now."
Aliza wanted to protest, but she understood what her daughter was asking.
What she was asking took courage; it was a sacrifice that she respected. Anastasia had made enemies. What she was asking her mother to do, she could do it, but she would endure it with a heavy heart.
She was going to lose her child again, perhaps forever.
Yet, she had to do it.
It was for the good of the family.
And Aliza Amelia Trevelyan always did what was good for the family.
She shook her head.
"I don't want to leave you here alone," she whispered.
Again, Anastasia smiled.
"I'm not alone mother. I've made more than allies here, I've made friends. Cassandra. Leliana, Josephine, and Cu…Commander Cullen, he…they are special to me. I…"
Aliza smiled
Her daughter paused.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Clearly, it is not nothing, please tell me."
Aliza shook her head. Her daughter had grown so strong, she had no desire to hurt or embarrass her, but…"
"This…Commander Cullen you have mentioned."
Anastasia immediately began to blush, and in that moment she knew what she suspected was right.
She should have noticed it before.
"I assume this Cullen is your man."
Her daughter's face turned pure scarlet. She giggled nervously.
"What…what makes… you say that?"
"Because I'm your mother, and I know you," she responded, "That…and your plunging neck line."
Aliza smiled.
"Am I wrong?"
IOI
Ana's eyes widened, she looked down.
Plunging?
So, she hadn't bothered to fully button her top this morning, and yes she had gone to speak with Cullen before sun up, but that…that did not mean.
Her mother gave her a knowing smile.
"Am I wrong?" she repeated.
The Inquisitor winced.
"It…um…it is nothing."
"Really?"
"Yeah," she shrugged, "And besides, it…it is not like I have a lot to plunge with anyway, I mean… look at me, I don't exactly have…well…my…I…they're not really…"
Mother did something then that shocked her.
She laughed.
She laughed hard.
Ana winced again.
Mother is laughing at me now, she thought.
Great.
IOI
Aliza did not mean to laugh but she could not help it. Seeing Ana here, it took away most of the doubts she had had.
Seeing her daughter fidget like that, seeing her act like the girl she had raised.
It made her feel good, despite the fact that she knew that she would need to let her go for the good of the family.
There was no doubt anymore.
This was her daughter, Anastasia.
She smiled, tears of joy streaming down her face.
Her sweet little Ana.
Thank the Maker for that.
