Chapter 56

"Elsie … I thought you were meant to be helping me dress … you should be fastening my shirt buttons not undoing them …" he gasped tetchily, knowing they were already running late for breakfast.

If the Butler was honest, it wasn't just the potential of being late that was worrying him; they also planned to speak to Lord Grantham this morning and he was feeling very anxious. Mr Carson was certain that their decision to retire much sooner was the right one but he predicted that, despite the Earl's wonderful support thus far, this might be a step too far for him.

"Charles Carson, you are wound up like a coiled spring and I am trying to help you relax … I know this morning will be difficult, it will be difficult for us both, but you behaving like an old grumpy-pants will not help!" she returned furiously, her hands on her hips now rather than on his shirt.

She watched as the Butler's shoulders relaxed and an amused smile appeared on his face.

"Grumpy-pants?" he questioned, raising his eyebrows and sliding his arms through hers, pulling his wife to him.

"Yes, grumpy-pants … and you are an old booby as well!" she replied seriously, trying to withhold her smile and resting her hands on his chest.

"Anything else?" he asked, as he rested his forehead against hers.

"Yes, you are downright impossible this morning …" she said, gently stroking the soft skin on his chest, as his shirt hung open.

"I am sorry, forgive me …" he whispered, moving his lips to kiss her cheek and rumbling with pleasure as she continued to stroke his chest.

"Are you regretting our decision Charles? Is that it? Do you want to wait until the end of the year to retire?" she asked.

"No Elsie, certainly not. I want to retire now, to begin our new life together now … I am just worried that Lord Grantham might think us ungrateful or selfish …" he explained.

"Charles, we have given a huge part of our life to this House … you have devoted decades and decades to the Family, it is entirely our choice if we feel it is time to retire … and no one could ever think you selfish or ungrateful … never," she said sincerely, reaching up to hug her husband.

She felt him sag with relief as he held her; his face in the crook of her neck as he inhaled her wonderful scent. He began to cover her neck in tiny, devoted kisses as she ran her hands through his hair and breathed blissfully at the feelings her husband could elicit within her, with just a few, small kisses. As she leaned backwards from their embrace, and gazed at him, she saw a devilish grin.

"Wait there …" he said enthusiastically, as he raced out of the room, fastening his shirt buttons as he went.

Within less than a minute he was back in the room, closing the door behind him.

"What?" she asked, as she looked at her husband's cheeky smile.

He clasped her hand and began to pull her back through to their bedroom.

"Charles … what about breakfast?" she asked, knowing that two minutes earlier he had been panicking about being late.

"I have sent word that we won't be joining them for breakfast … I seem to remember a promise from my beautiful wife to help me relax …" he flirted, pushing the Housekeeper back onto the bed, fully clothed in her day dress, as he leaned over her.

"Grumpy-pants!" she exclaimed, before pulling his lips to her own and kissing him passionately.

######

"Mr Barrow, do you have a second?" Mrs Carson asked, as she passed him in the corridor.

It was mid-morning and they were due to meet Lord Grantham in ten minutes.

"Yes Mrs Carson," he replied formally, following her into her sitting-room.

They stood a couple of feet apart, as the younger man looked at her nervously. He always felt a little unbalanced around the Housekeeper. He wasn't sure why but he felt her disappointment more greatly than he did from others.

"Thank you for not sharing our news about Becky with the other staff and for treating her with kindness," she smiled.

He looked up at the Housekeeper in surprise; he felt guilt that she was thanking him. They both knew that his initial motive for visiting the cottage was not pure. He had wanted to find out their 'secret' and when he did; he had immediately planned to use this information to his advantage.

"Mrs Carson, you shouldn't thank me," he said quietly, looking at his toes.

How can a man who acts so confidently and so callously at times, also have such a lack of confidence? His entire body was wracked with self-doubt and guilt as he stood before her. She knew that a significant part of Mr Barrow's turmoil was caused by his feelings towards men, feelings that were not tolerated in the society they lived in. Yet, there must be more to his troubled soul. This man cannot have had much love in his life, she thought sadly.

"Mr Barrow, I know your original purpose may not have been well-intentioned but you made the right decision in the end and that is what matters," she stated sincerely.

He looked up at her warm eyes and her kind face and nodded gently, hesitantly accepting this praise.

"And Mr Barrow, when Mr Carson and I do retire, you will always be welcome in our home …" she offered caringly, knowing this would be sooner rather than later.

Mr Barrow attempted to swallow his emotions as his eyes filled with tears.

"Do you think Mr Carson will agree with that sentiment?" he asked softly, with a wry smile.

"He will eventually," she replied with a twinkle, as the Under-Butler laughed.

"Thank you Mrs Carson," he managed, and with a small bow of the head, he left the room.

######

"How did it go?" Mrs Patmore asked, as she followed the Housekeeper into Mr Carson's pantry.

"It went … umm … ok I think," Mrs Carson replied, sounding perplexed.

Her husband followed her into the room.

"Just ok?" the Cook asked.

"Well, Lord Grantham was not negative as such," the Housekeeper added.

"No … but he wasn't positive either … he seemed almost shell-shocked," Mr Carson explained.

The two Heads of Staff looked as confused as Mrs Patmore. The conversation with Lord Grantham had been stilted at best. The Earl had been astonished to hear that both of his Heads of Staff planned to work a months' notice and then retire. They had reassured him that they would do everything in their power to ensure suitable replacements were found, although they'd had to admit there was not much time.

Mrs Carson had proposed an alternative, perhaps putting temporary arrangements in place with 'acting' Heads of Staff for a while, to allow further time to make permanent appointments. In this way, she offered, someone such as Mr Barrow could be given a trial period of something like six months to see how he coped. Mr Carson supported this idea, knowing that he had never had any cause for complaint in terms of the practical aspects of Mr Barrow's work; the Under-Butler had exacting standards and did his job well. However, it was the younger man's personality and ability to earn respect and lead a team that was in question. Lord Grantham had supported the idea of temporary promotions, thinking this sounded less risky than making hasty appointments.

Mr and Mrs Carson had also offered assurances that the Household was in such good order that the transition would be smooth, and of course, they had reassured that they would be nearby should any assistance be needed. They had told Lord Grantham about their recent stay at their own cottage and they had updated him about Mrs Carson's sister but even these personal details had not seemed to soften him. He had been polite but obviously needed time to digest their news fully.

"Oh well, probably best if I don't tell him that I plan to retire by the end of the year as well?" Mrs Patmore said, a cheerful smile on her lips.

"Really Mrs Patmore?" Mrs Carson asked.

She knew her friend had been considering retirement in the longer-term but she thought it was a few years off yet.

"Oh yes … the place won't be the same once you have both gone and it is time anyway, Daisy is more than capable of taking the helm," she smiled, confident in her protégés abilities.

"I wish the same could be said of Mr Barrow and … Anna? Or Miss Baxter?" Mr Carson asked, really not sure at all who would become the acting Heads of Staff.

"I don't think Anna would want it, she and Mr Bates will want to start a family soon. I do think Miss Baxter has potential although she'll need to come out of her shell a little," Mrs Carson reasoned.

"Anyway, at least you told him. Are you going to tell the staff at luncheon?" Mrs Patmore asked.

"Yes, that's the plan," Mr Carson replied happily. He at least felt relief that it was done; the decision was made and Lord Grantham had been informed.

"Good ... the staff will be pleased to see you … they missed you at breakfast," Mrs Patmore said, giving them both a knowing stare and walking out of the room with a chuckle and a swing in her step.

A/N: Thank you so much for your kind reviews- I love to read your thoughts about the story x