Sorry for the almost cliché quality of this chapter, and for the excessive cheese. I need to finish off with an intended explanation for a difference between KH1 and KH2 hence the arrival in this movie, and get all this errant stupid humor out of my system in preparation for where they're going next. Maybe it's something in my black, withered little heart crying out for an ounce of random happiness before I go plunging back into angst after the mind-fuck that was Wonderland. And the bit at the end wouldn't leave me alone until I typed it. Blame the caffeine! Mm. Diet Coke! Yummy.
FYI, there's also an optional chapter. I'll warn you right now – it's not the Cleon you're looking for, even though Leon's the POV. That'll be later. However, if you still want to view this thing even given my warning, just remove the spaces after each dot and slash and check it. It takes place before this chapter commences. I love dream sequences. (cackle)
www. angelfire. com/ ca/ shard2/ wsama/ bcd50-5. html
Disclaimer: I in no way own Kingdom hearts, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VIII or Hercules. Don't sue; I'm simply an E6 (frocked at that) in the USN, therefore I have no money. Ha.
A/N: each chapter is written from a different POV. The identity of the 'speaker' is located with the chapter's name. Just trying to avoid confusion here. :) For review replies, please see the bottom of the chapter. And that, as they say, is that.
-BEGIN FIC-
Chapter 50
The Ex-SOLDIER – Acknowledgement
My eyelids felt heavy as I pried them apart.
I was stiff, soar, and suffering from what had to be the most hellacious headache I'd ever experienced in my entire life, including those five years I'd been sucking air through a tube and bobbling in my very own tube of green Mako-flooded fluids. To boot, I was tethered in a rather uncomfortable position to a soft chair with ropes twisted into convoluted knots that showed no promise of giving way. The world was a blur of darkness punctuated by green and red and white dots that fuzzily danced before my pupils. My wing was battered and torn and pressing sharply into my back – gritting my teeth, I willed it away, wincing as magic flowed through my veins and tucked it back into the aura of darkness that encased me.
My eyes slid shut again as I groaned quietly, trying desperately to ignore the fact that my arm was asleep and my leg felt as if it were twisted entirely in the wrong direction. I couldn't feel my toes at all and my neck had a horrible crick in it that couldn't be popped from my captive state.
"Where am I…?" I softly groaned in my self-imposed dark environment, addressing whoever might be beyond my eyelids.
A scuffling, a thump, a rustle of cloth were the noises that struck my ears. Ah hah. There were indeed other persons around.
"Cloud! Your finally awake, eh?" Cid's rough voice snarled.
Ah, Cid! That meant… at least I'd not been taken captive by anyone.
But then again, I was tethered to a chair….
"Neh, what happened?" I quietly began, willing my eyes to open again. They slowly blinked, bringing the world one eyelash-flooded flicker at a time back into crisp focus despite the pounding in my skull.
I was onboard the gummi, bound to my usual chair with every line of rope that we'd packed. My clothes were tattered and blood-splattered, covered in soot and grime and stained with sweat.
The Heartless was looking curiously at me, big yellow eyes staring.
Yellow?
Oh crap….
"Get back here, you Shadowy bit. Sit your ass in yer chair!" Cid ordered. The Heartless looked blankly at him, apparently once again unable to comprehend simple statements. It took Cid patting the empty chair that the Heartless had apparently abandoned to get the little guy to move and reclaim his seat.
"Anyway, your really with us, Cloud?" Cid asked, his blue eyes a bit wide with concern even as he chewed on the remains of a burnt-out cigarette.
"Mmph," I grunted, trying desperately to move at least a bit. "Yeah. Why wouldn't I be…?"
"Just kinda had to wonder, considerin' the fucked-up state you were in when I had to drag your stupid ass into the gummi."
Fucked up state…?
Suddenly it washed over me.
Leon's hands on my body.
Leon's lips on my own.
Leon's eyes glowing, silver replaced by opalescence.
Sephiroth's voice professing that I would attain immortality. That I would become power incarnate. That I could touch a god, if only I would become of him.
No, but that wasn't Sephiroth… that was Leon, too….
And something within me had snapped at that. That sliver of darkness that pierces my heart, binding me to mediocrity within shadow just as firmly as the leather wing upon my back binds me to my contract with Hades. My contract to have delivered unto me the One-Winged Angel in exchange for the life of a would-be god.
I tried to struggle a little in my bonds, attempting to at least sit upright.
The Heartless was out of his chair in a second, his sharp claws making short work of the ropes and their knots as he set me free.
"Thanks," I automatically replied, disappointment and sorrow flooding my heart as he looked upon me with big, empty yellow eyes before hopping back into his seat when Cid bellowed at him.
He couldn't understand us anymore….
The person trapped within that Shadow's form that had so helped us through the terrors of Wonderland was gone once more.
Sitting up properly, I groaned and held my head. "Cid," I faintly began, "what became of Leon?"
Cid's teeth ground together audibly, mashing the filter of his spent cigarette beyond repair. As the remains of that stick fell from his mouth, he huffed and spat the cottony remnants of it from his mouth. "He's here," Cid began. "Been in the engine room of the gummi since we left."
"Since we left…?"
"We've been in space for five days now," Cid stated blandly. "We've been force feedin' your skinny ass Soup in Hand to keep you alive. Don't know how Leon's livin'. Dumb ass won't speak to me. Refuses to come out of the corner he got himself wedged into. Heartless here went to go try an' bring him some crackers, but he shoed him off."
I scowled. That didn't sound like Leon….
"See, thing is that he remembers what happened," the gummi's pilot softly stated.
My eyes widened.
The soft proclamations… the meteor barreling from the sky… the devouring of the Jabberwock's Heartless… the moves he'd made in my direction….
He remembered it all…?
Even to my mind, only a few things were clear. Everything was hazy, drawn, faded, dreamy. Wonderland, for the most part, was glazed in a fog of disbelief that made it completely unreal in my mind.
If everything I recalled was truly reality, that and whatever it was that filled the spaces between my scattered recollections….
No wonder he'd isolated himself.
"I'll deal with him," I interjected, rising from my seat and stumbling on unused legs towards the engine room's hatch. Setting a thin hand on the heavy portal I eased it open and shoved my head through.
"Go away," a soft voice whimpered somberly from the shadowy depths of the unmanned space.
"Leon?" I began, my voice as kind and accepting and comforting as I could make it.
"Leave me alone."
"Come on. Won't you come out and be with the-"
"Go away," he interrupted, his voice hitching on a repressed sob. The lump that I could identify as him curled a bit more tightly in upon itself. Thin arms seemed to grip folded legs even more desperately. A bowed head pressed its face into those arms, hair effectively covering whatever expression I would have otherwise been able to garner.
With a sigh, I complied with his wishes.
Even as I turned on my heel to approach my chair again, my eyes widened and threatened to spring from my skull. "The hell!" I blurted.
"What's your problem now, Spiky?" Cid bit, glaring at me over his shoulder.
"Please, please tell me we're not landing there," I all but whined.
"Yep, we are!" he professed even as he barreled the gummi right into the ground next to the huge, looming gates. "Got a fuckin' problem with it?"
I groaned in dismay even as the hold I usually maintain over the physical evidence of my contract that bound my soul was overrun with the power of this world's inhabitants and my wing burst into reality. "Yeah."
"What the hell, Cloud?"
"Let's just say that… well, remember when you picked me up?"
"Oh yeah!" Cid professed, slapping his fist into the palm of his other hand even as he rose from his own seat and stomped back to the pile of clean laundry on the floor near me. "This was the place, wasn't it? Which means that you know your way around this fuckin' dump! And you already know some of the natives! And-"
"I'm under contract with the God of the Underworld to kill someone. And until I complete that contract, I'll be required to stay here and partake in their damned tournaments," I finished.
"For fuck's sake, Cloud! Why the damned hell do you have to make things so fucking difficult all the time?" Cid snapped.
"Shut up," I simpered as I yanked the remains of my clothing that I'd been unable to grab before our arduous trip into Wonderland onto my body, reclaimed First Tsurugi and its scabbard and grabbed a good helping of materia from our storage chest. "I'll get going. I've got things to do."
"Well, I'm gonna see 'bout findin' us a few parts for the gummi. You make sure you wrap this shit up quick as shit so we can blast off! Don't you think for a flamin' second that I'm gonna leave your sorry ass here; I'd never hear the end of it from Aerith if I did," Cid groused.
"Yeah, sure," I sighed even as I walked off the gummi, my cape fluttering behind me in an ethereal breeze.
Needless to say, things were what I'd expected them to be.
I stomped past the decorative gate that marked the border of the world, ignoring the deep voice that uttered, "Long ago, in the far away land of ancient Greece there was a golden age of powerful gods, extraordinary heroes…"
"And greatest and strongest of all these Heroes was the mighty Hercules," I grumpily breathed. "I know, I know. The same damned song and dance number is done every time some new unfortunate steps onto this rotten rock. Shut up already."
As I stomped right through the gates without pausing to listen to the rest of the narrative that always proclaimed Hercules' greatness, I sighed and let my shoulders slump.
"You can stop following me in darkness. I know you're there," I muttered.
I could only huff at the overly dramatized entrance of the person who'd been following me. Yeah, big ass shadow falling over me. Yeah, blue fire. Yeah, an enormous blue-skinned hand on my shoulder and a giant sharp-toothed grin right beside my face. Thank you so much for invading my privacy bubble.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite overcompensating sword slinger! Spike, it's been forever babe!"
"Sure, Hades," I huffed.
"And your return is so very prompt, too," he rambled on, his free hand waving in the air at his side as he all but forcibly shoved me along towards the huge wooden doors that marked the proper entrance to the Coliseum. "Got your ticket, my happy chocobo-headed champion. A new tournament is scheduled to open this afternoon, its top seed being that aggravating little perfect sunspot Hercules."
I casually leaned away from the huge blast of red fire that burst from the fast-talking God's head and shoulders. With a grunt I snatched the ticket from his clenched fist and ducked out of his overly tight grasp, the loose fabric of my cloak giving me some chance to maneuver.
As Hades slowly swiped his emptied hand over his head and breathed a calming sigh, the fire that made up his hair fading back to blue as he did so, he smirked at me. "Hop to, Spike. You've got a job to do. Get rid of Hercules, and we'll see what we can do about your special delivery."
I stopped my walk towards those doors, looking at the ticket in my hand.
Was seeing him really that important anymore…?
Yes, I wanted to be rid of my darkness, but….
Was seeing him again really worth the potential price?
Did I really want this to happen here and now, especially with my friends and….
With Leon here?
"You know, forget it," I breathed as I turned back to face Hades and held the ticket out to him. "I don't care about finding him anymore. I can live my life without facing my darkness – I just have to accept it, and accept the fact that others are still willing to accept me despite that taint. My heart doesn't belong so exclusively to darkness anymore that I feel I must seek it out and face it. That detrimental focus has been repaired by another. I don't need this."
Hot orange flame washed over me as Hades veritably burst. "WHAT! You impertinent little mongrel! You think you can bow out just because you changed your mind? You forget – I OWN YOU!"
He stormed towards me more quickly than I could possibly flee – his clawed right hand quickly snagged its talons into my ripped wing. I couldn't help but cry out in pain as he tore through already wounded flesh and the fire that blazed atop his head and over his shoulders leaked down his arms to brush against my skin.
"So, my little sucker, thinking of backing out? You don't have that option! Remember your contract? As long as there're tournaments you can get into, you're in! You go until you can take him down in front of the public eye, on your darkness-stained little soul! You think you have a choice in the matter? Your choices were nullified when you shook!"
Tears welled in my eyes as I sagged before him, pain washing over my senses just as thoroughly as my own frustration at my ineptitude and my rash decisions made so long ago that had condemned me.
"So," he snarled before letting his mouth sag open, a puff of breath bursting from between his sharp teeth and his continence turning blue once more, "get in there and fight. I expect to see Hercules dead by the end of this, Spike."
I groaned, my head sagging as Hades burst into a cloud of heat and black smoke, vanishing from the Coliseum's open-aired atrium.
Finding the satyr Phil didn't put me into any better of mood – first, he wasn't overly happy to see me. My ticket was all that granted me entry into his tournament; my entry was only guaranteed after I assured the stubborn little goat that Leon wouldn't be entering as well.
Seemed the bow-legged little fuzz ball was still bitter about being kicked by the gunblader across his lobby when said gunblader was escorting me to the tubs to make certain I was alright after facing off with Cerberus during the Hades Cup tournament. Time's passage certainly didn't make his opinion of Leon raise any.
Out of options and out of things to do until the tournament was scheduled to start, I glowered at the gates, noted the starting time and stormed out of a side passage I used to frequent during my extended stay in the Grecian hellhole I frequented. Passing right past the doorways that lead to the expansive network of baths and hot tubs, I continued on towards my intended destination. It wasn't long until I came across the other place I used to meander to in order to escape and relax – the gardens.
With a hearty exhalation, I flopped myself down onto a hard stone bench and shook my head. Mako eyes hard, I glowered coolly at the gently lapping pool that segregated the small section of park I was seated in from the small, almost hidden side doors that lead to the interior of the mighty Coliseum. "You know," I softly murmured, softly to the trees and the flowers that would dare listen to my lame lamentations, "if there's a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I've already won that."
My hands twisted their fingers together as I calmly seethed internally, my mind blurrily recalling what I'd been witness to during our journey to this hateful place. Leon's avoidance of me, Leon's order that I leave him alone… Leon's remarks to me when his eyes glowed unnaturally within their sockets… Leon's odd behavior in Wonderland and his brash forward motions without regard for my opinions, my longings or my comfort. It was annoying. It was frustrating. It was pissing me the hell off. Focusing back on that pool, I huffed with irritation staining my breath. "No man is worth the aggravation." Go back to Leon? Beg to know what was going on in his twisted, turmoil-rattled brain? Just for the hope of recovering a relationship that….
A relationship that had always been friendship, no matter how long I had been secretly wishing for it to be something deeper, something more fulfilling?
"That's ancient history," I sighed softly. "Been there, done that."
I quirked a brow, glancing around as a series of female voices that sounded oddly like those damned muses that always sing the praises of Hercules at the gates to the world burst around me, loudly and musically proclaiming, "Who'd'ya think you're kiddin'? He's the Earth and Heaven to you! Try to keep it hidden; Honey, we can see right through you."
I bolted off of my bench, looking wildly around the garden park I was in. Where the hell were those wenches?
Their voices continued to taunt me, happily singing, "Boy, ya can't conceal it. We know how ya feel and who you're thinking of!"
My fists balled at my sides as I swiftly replied, "No chance, no way! I won't say it, no no!"
They replied, "You swoon, you sigh! Why deny it, uh-oh!"
"It's too cliché," I huffed. "I won't say I'm in love."
Turning sharply on my heels, I stomped my way around the garden, trying desperately to ignore the stony gazes of the statues around me and the sensation of muses peering at me from their hiding places. My lips twisting into a snarl, I ground out my explanation, the need to justify my oddly surfacing longings that I'd kept repressed for so long to myself overwhelming. "I thought my heart had learned its lesson. It feels so good when you start out," I sighed.
It did. When I first set my eyes upon him, secretly admiring the sheer strength and poise he naturally flaunted, when I first felt the touch of that cool personality with the carefully guarded concern laying under a layer of protective frost, when I first discovered the soft and sadness-enshrouded heart that he hides behind a wall of ice so strong it can be likened to steel I'd been infatuated. Enthralled, even. I'd been captivated, despite my many attempts to reassure myself that all I felt for the man was appreciation for his strength as a fellow warrior in the battle against the Heartless and my attempts to regulate myself to mere friendship with him.
My heart, regardless of my brain's attempts to keep my opinions of him solely platonic, always fluttered madly ever since that moment we'd first met in the Coliseum's lobby. But my heart, as was shown in Wonderland, would lead me to hurt and pain, down paths I'd already traveled as shown by that summoned clone of Sephiroth. My mind had the correct path. My mouth moved of its own accord, as if verbal reiteration of my thoughts would make them seem that much more correct and real. "My head is screaming 'get a grip, boy,' unless you're dying to cry your heart out." My breath leaked away in a sigh of "Oh…."
From their hiding places, the muses' chipper voices burst into song again. "You keep on denying who you are and how you're feeling. Baby, we're not buying! Hon, we saw ya hit the ceiling; face it like a grown-up. When ya gonna own up that ya got, got, got it bad!"
I snarled, "No chance, no way! I won't say it, no no!"
"Give up, give in! Check the grin! You're in love," they retaliated.
"This scene won't play! I won't say I'm in love."
"You're doin' flips! Read our lips; you're in love," the muses sang brightly.
I grit my teeth tightly, seething madly, my face so flushed with frustration that I was certain steam was roiling off of my head. "You're way off base. I won't say it! Get off my case! I won't say it."
Their voices were merry as they called from wherever it was they were stashed, "Boy, don't be proud. It's okay, you're in love."
I sighed softly, turning back towards the doors to the Coliseum.
Did I really feel…?
I let a soft, slight smile leak over my lips as I hung my head, my bangs shading my Mako eyes from the world.
Life did seem awfully empty without him around.
Maybe…
"Oh, at least out loud, I won't say I'm in love," I softly mumbled.
Applause filled the air, light clapping of a single pair of hands ringing detrimentally loud. I cringed, my cheeks flushed now not in frustration but in sheer embarrassment.
"Beautiful, Spiky. But you know, there's no love for song-stealing Prima Donnas. Why don't'cha move it, buster? I could swear you've got a butt kicking waiting for you from Wonder Boy. Go forth and wave around your big chunk of metallic compensation, little man."
My face burning furiously, I glowered at the thin brunette who'd walked unnoticed into the garden I inhabited.
"Go on, fluff-brain. This is my number. Or do I have to spell it out for ya? Maybe spill your little secret to the one you're singing my song for?"
A grunt passed from my throat. "I've got to get to that lobby. That damned satyr had better have the tournament opened when I get there – I have a contract to uphold."
As I stormed away, my wing spread to my side, my cape fluttering dramatically behind me and the golden claws of the glove on my left hand sparkling in the wan moonlight, the woman who'd walked in on me waved before flopping her skinny butt down on the bench I'd abandoned.
My eyes twitched as I heard her voice profess, "Alright girls. Let's get this song over with."
Even as the muses twittered and laughed, she ordered them, "Once again, from the top!"
-to be continued-
Review replies:
hybrid2: Heh heh. Thanks for reviewing! Well, seeing as how my goal is to stay true to the movies that he goes in, Sora didn't have much of a choice but to go through what he experienced. But then again, I like traumatizing happy characters. ;) Your recount of your friend playing Alice made me laugh exuberantly! That game's so awesome. Yeah, everyone's going to have fun trying to heal from that mess. (smirk) Anyway, thanks for reviewing, and hope you liked this very… odd chapter!
Melodious Flurry: Cool, a plushie of the only party member in KH that has common sense! Let's hear it for Goofy! Anyway, thanks for the compliments. I'm glad that the last chapter was satisfactory. Yeah, I know where I'm actually going with this, so it's a little late for suggestions… however, I'm hoping that my choices for up and coming movies will please. I'm almost positive that they'll be well received, though. Hope you liked this chapter, and thanks for the review!
Raz: Thanks so much for reviewing! I'm glad you liked the Sora chapter (and your reminder of my favorite ride at Disneyland of all time, Space Mountain! Yippee!) – that was actually a terribly fun one to write, and gave me the opportunity to really play with his character. I prefer him being a little more mature… and one has to admit, he actually does magically mature between KH1 and KH:CoM – he goes from wanking about saving worlds to wanking about his missing best friend and making things right for once. Can only attribute it to the time between the two, neh? Mwa hah hah. BTW, absolutely adore your take on the FF/Sora reunion. Hilarious! And as for what the 'remains of a FF world' will do… all in due time, my dear. All in due time. Thanks for the reminder of 'popcorn logic' – I guess I'm supremely anal about things like that… heck, I'm one of those people who blurted in the theatre when watching 'Apollo 13' "Hey! That's the modern NASA sign! And why does that Corvette have 90's California license plates on it?" Yep, smack me now. (sheepish grin) Leon/Cloud: … angst mental breakdown (falls over laughing) Thanks again, and hope you liked this chapter… even though it did delve considerably into cheese. (breaks open a bottle of Felsinger White Cabernet to enjoy with the latest installment of BCD)
Hikari of the Moon: Ah, awesomeness! I certainly hope that ff. net gets its blasted email alert system repaired one of these days. (snarl snort) Sheesh. Glad your friend got you to notice the update – many thanks along with a procession of kitty kisses are offered! (mashes her kitten's muzzle against her computer's abused monitor) Yeah, definitely not one of Disney's conventional moments, 'The Black Hole.' Cascading through imagery of Hell and the path to Heaven and the existence Beyond was rather mind blowing and terrifying to a little brat who was watching it on Wonderful World of Disney with her Mom and Dad. (grin) One of the few where the ending is… not the happiest of all time. Hence why it has a wacko cult following (proudly waves her hands in the air) and isn't a popular mainstream 'Disney Classic.' Oh, I'll relay to Ava that she has your gratitude. I think appreciation for her efforts and her Christmas gift to me will truly be felt once the film itself is actually mentioned - it's coming up soon enough! Anyway, your wish is my demand – new chapter posted, and hope you like it! Thanks so much for the review! The Ansem plushie would thank you too, if he weren't so busy reveling in the fact that he has a following submitting to him.
scarlettHuntress: Aw, only skimmed? You're going to be missing out on an awesome movie if you don't bother with the Sora stuff! (waves case tauntingly) Actually, I rather love the end of the last Sora chapter. All dark an' stuff. Well, anyway, here's an FF bit. Hope this met your expectations. Thanks for the review!
Li the Twilight Knight: So sorry to hear about your connection! Sucktastic, I say. Bleh. Thanks for the link - I've seen almost all of those before, but the bloopers they pointed out (Cloud's magically water repellant clothing, for example) were pretty darned funny. :) Knew about the Aerith stuff too - I was, like, 'what the heck is this crap? The bimbo's dead, and now I have to witness the ghost of Splato the Wonder Yutz?' Keh heh heh. I heart Aerith. Just like I heart work. They both make me a raving alcoholic.(bounces around like a hyperactive gerbil) I hate this movie with a passion, but they used it and I need this reprieve. It's building up to another marvelous bonus chapter. Yippee!
Yes, I've had lots of wonderful, marvelous caffeinated beverage. YAY! (smushes the Ansem plushie against her chest, letting it barely wheeze out "SUBMIT!")
