Spirits are high at The Sanctuary after Christmas. When New Years Eve comes around, residents are excited to let loose and party a little.

"You gonna come down to the rec room with me tonight?" Negan asks Chuck as he sits down beside her on the couch in their room.

"I guess," Chuck answers, not exactly excited about the prospect.

"You don't fuckin' have to." He props his arm on the back of the couch behind Chuck and twirls one of her curls in his fingers absentmindedly. "I just thought we could fuckin' kiss at midnight."

Chuck laughs. "I forgot that was a thing."

He raises his eyebrows questioningly. "You forgot?"

She shrugs a shoulder. "Well, it's been a few years since I watched the ball drop on New Year's Rockin' Eve," Chuck jokes back sarcastically.

Negan laughs, too.

"Besides, I've literally never kissed anyone on New Year's."

"Really?" Negan asks.

Chuck gives him an incredulous look. "You think I was invited to a lot of New Year's Eve parties back in the day?"

Negan shrugs, but still smirks at her. "Well, I'll be fuckin' honored to be your first 'first kiss of the new year'." He chuckles at himself then leans over to kiss her.

Chuck giggles. "I guess I can make an appearance with you tonight," she jokes back.

Later that night, Negan and Chuck walk into the second floor rec room hand in hand. Everyone pauses their festivities to bow in respect.

Negan holds his arm out wide, thrusting Lucille in the air. "Now that I'm here," he calls out, "this party can really get fuckin' started! As you were!" Negan starts to walk further into the room as people rise. "Someone get me a fuckin' drink!"

Someone does get Negan a drink. Several of them, in fact. And Chuck knows that Negan is going to regret it in the morning.

"You know," Chuck leans in to speak to Negan as they sit on a couch, "you're gonna say 'why did you let me drink so much' tomorrow," she teases.

Negan takes a swig of the clear liquid in his glass and pulls her into his side. "I'll be fine, baby. Don't fuckin' worry."

By the time 11:59 hits, everyone except Chuck is pretty rowdy drunk. But they're still able to count down.

"Five, four, three..." everyone chants.

Chuck grabs ahold of Negan's hand and can't help the big smile that appears on her face as she looks into his eyes.

"...two, one! Happy New year!"

Negan pulls her into him and kisses her deeply. The whole world melts away around Chuck while she savors the feel of her husband. After everything she's been through, she's still truly happy at this moment.

Negan breaks the kiss, but doesn't move back, smiling wide against her lips. "Happy New Year, baby," he whispers.

"Happy New Year," she repeats.

Though Chuck is tired, she stays with Negan as he continues to imbibe and participate in the festivities. It takes her literally falling asleep on Negan's shoulder as he is recounting a story for some saviors for him to decide to leave.

When they get to their apartment, Negan crashes quickly, barely setting Lucille on the coffee table and getting his boots off before collapsing on the bed. Chuck lets out a sigh before attempting to undress Negan and getting him fully in the bed. By the time that's done and she's in her own nightgown, Chuck herself collapses on the bed, too, falling asleep almost instantly.

The next morning, Negan's loud snores wake Chuck up. She lets out a groan, and gets up to start the day. It actually isn't too early, well past the time Negan usually wakes up. But Chuck figures he needs the rest after last night.

After Chuck gets ready for the day, she fills a glass with water and moves toward Negan's nightstand to set it there, knowing that he'll need it when he wakes up. Just as she turns to walk away, Negan begins to stir.

He groans. "Fuuuuck. Why'd you let me drink so goddamn much?"

Chuck giggles and sits on the edge of the bed to face him. "I knew you'd say that." She hands him the glass of water as he shifts to sit up.

He looks at the glass and eagerly takes it in his hands. "You're a fuckin' godsend." He downs the water in one drink.

"I'll get you some more." Chuck takes the glass from him and fills it back up in the kitchen. When she gets back to the bedroom, Negan is in the bathroom, loudly relieving himself with the door wide open. She rolls her eyes and sets the drink back on the bedside table.

"Fuck," Negan groans, "I'm too old for this shit."

"I warned you," Chuck says under her breath with a giggle.

"What?"

Chuck moves closer to the bathroom as he finishes. "You need a shower. You smell like a bar."

"Come join me," he teases with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

"I already took a shower. I've been up for an hour, lazy bones," she teases back.

"Did you eat?"

"I'm going to now."

He rubs at his temples, obviously feeling the hangover he certainly must have. "I'll make you something." He starts to cross the room to get to the kitchen, but Chuck stops him.

"Take a shower." She pats him on his bare chest. "I can manage one meal by myself."

Negan ends up barely leaving the apartment all day, practically mainlining Tylenol to combat his headache. Despite some whining, Negan allows Chuck to take care of him for a change. She feeds him and makes sure to keep him hydrated.

She doesn't mind. Actually, she kind of enjoys being the one that Negan is depending on. She makes herself giggle when she thinks that this is good practice for when the baby comes.

— Negan's POV —

Pretty much right after New Year's, pregnancy brain starts to hit Chuck like a ton of fuckin' bricks. I think it's fuckin' cute, but Chuck doesn't. She says she hates feeling stupid. I try to tell her that she's not fuckin' stupid, she's just a little absent-fuckin'-minded at the moment. She still gets so fuckin' frustrated when she can't think of the right words. Or when she loses shit.

I get home one day and Chuck is fuckin' tearing the bedroom apart, mad as shit.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I ask as I walk over to her.

She lets out a frustrated growl and turns back to me. "I was playing Bioshock and I somehow lost the controller so I just started to use the other one, but I fuckin' lost it, too!" She lets out a breath when she realizes what she said. "Sorry I swore."

I can't help but fuckin' laugh at her. This pregnancy brain shit can get her so fuckin' flustered. "You're fuckin' adorable."

"I'm mad, Negan!" she bites back.

"I'll help you look, sweetheart." I give her a little kiss and start searching/picking up the shit she threw around. I check in the bathroom. Not there. "Did you go out to the kitchen?" I ask when I come back out to the bedroom.

"I'm not sure," she answers as she looks around the couch and chairs.

I chuckle. "Well, there's a glass of water on the coffee table," I point out.

"Oh," she looks at it. "Yeah, I did get a drink."

I look around the kitchen for a minute before I open the goddamn fridge. And right on the top shelf is one controller. "Found one," I call out as I walk back into the room.

She takes it from me. "I looked in the kitchen."

"It was in the fridge."

"It wasn't," she responds, not believing me.

I smile at her. "It was."

She lets out a fuckin' groan. "What's going on in my head?!"

I laugh and lean down to kiss her forehead. "Keep playing your game. I'll find the fuckin' other one." She sits down on the couch and resumes her game while I search around for the other controller.

It takes me twenty fuckin' minutes, but I find the other controller sitting on my office chair at my desk. Apparently, she had set in on the chair, then pushed it the fuck in under my desk.

"Oh, yeah," she explains when I take the controller back to her. "I looked out the window in your office because it started to snow."

I plop myself down beside her on the couch. "Do I get a fuckin' thank you?" I tease.

She pauses her game and turns to me, giving me a kiss that definitely is gonna lead to some fucking. "Thank you." She pulls away and sits back down, unpausing her fuckin' game to start playing again.

"Uhh... you can't just fuckin' kiss me like that and go back to your fuckin' game," I joke. Sorta. Shit's definitely stirring in my pants after that kiss.

She giggles. "Even when I'm all fat and gross, you still want me?"

"You're not fat. Or gross. You're fuckin' perfect. And my dick thinks so, too."

She gives me side eye. "You really wanna have sex right now?"

"Well. Not if you don't fuckin' want to."

She gives me that smile that I know means that she wants me to fuck her. But she acts like she's gotta fuckin' decide. She always does that. She thinks I can't tell when she's horny and she tries to act all casual about it. But I can read her like a fuckin' book.

We don't fuck as much as we used to. Shit, we used to fuck every night pretty much. We still fuck a lot, don't get me wrong, but some days I can tell she's too tired or uncomfortable. But also, some days she wants to fuck a ton. It all depends on her hormones.

Now that her belly's bigger, straight missionary is kinda fuckin' out of the question. I usually let her pick the position, because she'll know what's gonna be fuckin' comfortable for her. As it is right now, she's naked and laying on her side in my bed. Our bed.

I crawl over top of her and she turns her head to kiss me. I make sure I don't have any of my weight on her as we make out.

She stops kissing me to say, "Baby's kicking."

"Really?" I pull away to sit back on my knees.

"Probably because I usually take a nap now."

I lean back over Chuck and place my hand on her stomach. Sure enough, Maddie's kicking up a fuckin' storm. "Nice fuckin' timing, kid."

"We can still do it," Chuck says quietly. "If you're not freaked out about it. I mean, she doesn't know what's going on, you know."

I laugh. I'm not exactly freaked out about it. A little bit, I fuckin' guess. I mean, my dick is gonna be pretty close to my baby and that's fuckin' weird as shit to think about. But it's not making my dick go soft cuz Chuck's right. The baby is fuckin' fine in her own little world, completely separate from where my dick's gonna be. And Chuck is wet and waiting for me right now. What kinda husband would I be if I didn't take care of my wife?

Fucking Chuck is different, now. It's still great. I'm not saying it's fuckin' bad. It's just different. Mainly because I have to make sure I don't fuckin' hurt her. I know she tells me I don't have to be as fuckin' careful as I am, but I can't help it. And it's worse now that she has a bigger belly.

There were definitely times I lost control before she looked really pregnant. I mean, I knew she was pregnant, but she didn't really look it yet, so I wasn't as gentle with her. And I always fuckin' worried about it afterward, about me hurting her.

It's just really fuckin' easy for me to lose control when I'm with her. Shit, that's actually why she's pregnant, I guess. Thank fuck she doesn't hate me for it. But if I would hurt her, I'd kill myself.

So, yeah, I can get fuckin' cautious when I'm fucking her.

I move to get my dick in position, but she stops me.

"Hang on," she says and starts to shift. She gets on her hands and knees in front of me then looks back. "Okay. Go on."

I gently run my hands over her ass and hips. "Shit, baby girl. You sure you don't want to lay down."

"Don't worry, Negan. Come on." She wiggles her ass a little.

"I didn't say I was fuckin' worried."

"You always call me 'baby girl' when you're worried."

"No I don't."

"Yes, you do," she asserts. "Like nine times out of ten, you do."

I let out a huff. Okay, she might be right, now that I fuckin' think about it. "You fuckin' ready, then?" I rub my fingers through her pussy lips, feeling that she's really fuckin' wet. Guess that answers my question.

"Yes, Negan," she breathes out and it's just the push I need.

I slowly enter her from behind and start a pretty lazy pace. But, fuck, if she doesn't feel like goddamn heaven. She always has. From that first time I fucked her, I knew I wouldn't be able to stay away from her. And I get that feeling still, every fuckin' time I'm with her.

"Mmm," she starts to moan. "Negan, go faster please."

Her heavy breaths have me obeying her pretty fuckin' quick. I thrust in a bit harder and a bit faster as I rub my hands all over her fuckin' soft skin.

She shifts to lean on her forearms instead of her fuckin' hands, lowering her upper body and changing the angle that my dick is entering her.

"Oh god, Negan."

Shit. I'm hitting her g spot. That always gets her fuckin' moaning. And her moans drive me fuckin' crazy.

"Fuck, baby." I keep thrusting, trying to keep my goddamn rhythm steady for her. She's not that close yet, and if I speed up, I'm gonna blow my fuckin' load.

"Oh, Negan!" Her voice is higher now and her fuckin' breaths are sharper. Now she's close.

"Mmm. You feel so fuckin' good. You gonna cum for me?" I speed up and bring my hand under her to play with her clit. I gotta maneuver around her belly, but I get my hand there.

"Ah!" she moans and it about makes me cum, but I keep it together. "Oh! Oh god, Negan!" She's music to my fuckin' ears.

I can feel her tighten around me. She's gonna cum, but she always tries to hold off as long as possible. So I try to fuckin' hold off until she goes. Sometimes that's fuckin' hard and I cum a little early, but she never fuckin' complains.

I speed up even more until she starts to buck her hips in that rhythmic way she always does right before she cums. Her breaths get sharper and shorter until she holds her breath and her whole body gets tight.

"Fuck." I'm groaning and panting, just waiting for her to go over the edge. "Cum, Chuck."

With a long moan she does. And I do, too. Her spasming walls fuckin' milk me until I have nothing left to fuckin' give. I stay inside her until her aftershocks fuckin' stop. Then I make sure to lay her down gently on her fuckin' side. I cuddle up behind her and throw my arm around her.

"Mmm," she hums and places her hand over mine on her belly. "That was nice."

"You okay, baby girl?" Shit. I guess I do say it when I'm fuckin' worried.

She giggles. "Yeah, Negan. I'm fine." She brings my hand to her lips and kisses it. "Just tired now."

"Well, sleep, sweetheart." I lean forward to kiss her cheek. "I'll clean you all up."

A few days later, I'm headed off to the cells while I got some free time. I gotta be in the radio room in a couple hours to talk to Rick and Jesus about our plans to get rid of all the fuckin' biters in the dead zones. It's starting to get cold enough that they're slowing the fuck down. Soon, they'll be frozen fuckin' solid. That'll make it easy for us to just fuck 'em up. Maybe we'll use chainsaws, or some shit.

Fuck! That sounds bad ass.

Since Rick isn't gonna be on the horn yet, I decide to see my little prisoner. I promised Chuck I wouldn't leave The Sanctuary, and I kept that promise. But I was not about to let that slimy fuck Gregory off the hook. So Simon went to Hilltop and brought him to me right after the Eldritch shit went down.

Gregory has been rotting in my cells ever since. I haven't told Chuck that, though. I'm sure she wouldn't be okay with this, considering I know how she feels about bloodshed. And I know that she still feels fuckin' guilty about all the shit that went down with Eldritch. She's written about it in her diary a lot.

Yeah, yeah. I know it's kinda shitty to read her journal. But after all that shit happened with us fighting and her being so upset and not telling me, I decided to check up on her a little bit. Without her knowledge.

She doesn't really keep shit from me altogether. But she definitely has a fuckin' habit of not telling me the the full extent of things. Like, she'll tell me she feels bad about something, but in her diary, she says she can't stop fuckin' thinking about it.

So I read her journal and then I know what to say to her to make her feel fuckin' better. It's really a win/win.

Not to mention that she recounts our fuck sessions. In detail. It's like reading fuckin' porn. It gives me something to jerk off to when she's downstairs.

I turn the music off that I've had blasting in his cell 24/7. It's some annoying as fuck song from a random cd I found in the marketplace. I remembered seeing on tv once that the military would blast fuckin' Metallica as a form of psychological warfare for their enemies. Figured, if it worked for them...

I whip open the door and Gregory fuckin' scrambles to cower in the corner.

"Jesus Christ! You smell like shit, Gregs!" I cover my nose with my free hand.

He just whimpers pathetically. He's fuckin' naked and covered in goddamn dirt or shit or what-the-fuck-ever. He's fuckin' skinny, too. We've been feeding him the bare fuckin' minimum to keep him alive. I guess expired fuckin' dog food on stale bread still has enough goddamn nutrients in it, though.

"P-Please, Negan," Gregory whines weakly.

I just laugh under my breath. "And why exactly do you think I should fuckin' do anything for you? You have been a thorn in my ass from day fuckin' one. Or do I need to remind you of the shit you've done to me?" I raise my hand to count off on my fingers. "One. You got two of my guys killed because you couldn't handle your shit. Two. You sent Rick and him men to kill me and mine. Three." I bend down so I can lean into him and spit this right into his fuckin' face, "you ran off and joined up with the guy that kidnapped my wife. My pregnant wife," I growl.

"I'm sorry. I-I didn't know."

I slap him right in his lying fuckin' face. "You think I believe that for one. goddamn. SECOND!"

He cowers away from me and covers his head, whimpering the whole fuckin' time like a little bitch.

I take a deep breath and stand. "You're fuckin' lucky I don't have any horses or I'd draw and quarter your ass, you sorry shit. Instead, I allow you to keep breathing. I have my guys bring you specially tailored gourmet meals. Give you some fine ass entertainment." I point to the speaker in the corner. "So, I think a little 'thank you' is in order."

He stares up at me before choking out a quiet "thank you".

"Thank you...?" I prompt him to say something further.

"Th-Thank you, sir."

I do the "keep going" motion. "For...?

He blinks his eyes a bunch of times. "Thank you for not draw and quartering me. And feeding me. And en-entertaining me."

"There we go!" I call out cheerily. "That wasn't so goddamn hard." I turn around to leave. "See ya later, Gregs." I slam the door shut behind me and start the music back up.

Welp, now I gotta head to the radio room to talk with Rick. And I whistle the whole way.

— —

Chuck finds herself walking around The Sanctuary in boredom since she is in between jobs at the moment. She had taught her class to the kids earlier, then ate lunch with Tonya and Frankie. When they had to get back to work, Chuck started to amble around aimlessly. The only thing she really has to do today is teach her afternoon class and it isn't for a few more hours.

Chuck knows that Negan and Simon are busy right now, so she can't hang out with them. They're both in the radio room talking with Rick about clearing out the dead zones. Negan had told her that it was almost time to start that.

The former wives, Chuck's only other friends, are also busy at their different jobs.

Oh, wait. Kayla told me she had the day off today. I can visit with her. Oh, but I remember that she told me she was planning on hanging out with Felix today because he has the day off, too.

Hmm. I don't want to be a third wheel.

If Kayla's not in the infirmary, maybe Dr. Carson will want some company. I feel kinda bad that I haven't really talked to him too much since I stopped working with him. I mean, I've talked to him at my checkups, but that's just professional. He did teach me a lot of stuff and I never really thanked him for it.

You know what, It's usually slow after lunch. I'll go visit with Dr. Carson.

Right before Chuck gets to the infirmary, she passes Dwight.

"Hello," she greets with a wave. Chuck had gotten to know the man a little bit better after she had returned home from the stuff with Eldritch. Mostly through Sherry. Chuck found that Dwight seemed much lighter now than she thought he was. Maybe it's because he's with Sherry and happy, or maybe Chuck just didn't give him a shot before.

"Hey, Chuck," he greets back and continues on his way.

Chuck hears Arat, her current body guard, stop Dwight behind her and start to talk with him about something. Arat had told Chuck before that she's pretty good friends with the man. She figures that Arat will catch up with her in a minute; she is just a little ways down the hall.

When Chuck gets to the infirmary door, she sees that it is shut. Carson usually liked to keep it closed to try to keep out "contaminants", he said. But he may have a patient in there, so Chuck decides to knock. She raps her knuckles on the door a few times, but gets nothing in response.

"Dr. Carson?" Chuck calls out, thinking that maybe he's still out for lunch.

Chuck starts to push the door, but something forces it open. Before she realizes what's really happening, she's pushed backwards and falls to the floor. And someone is on top of her.

No. Not someone, but something. A dead one.

Chuck screams as the biter's teeth snap right in front of her face. She wedges her forearm under the monster's chin so it can't lean its head down to bite her as her other arm tries to push it away. It seems like the encounter lasts forever before the biter is pulled off of her and put down.

Dwight leans down to Chuck. "Don't get up." He looks up to Arat, who is pulling her knife out of the biter's skull. "Get Negan. And Kayla."

Arat pulls her radio up and starts yelling into it.

Chuck is completely in shock, barely able to process what just happened. When she finally comes to, she feels a set of hands groping at her. "Don't touch me!" she screams automatically and tries to slap the hands away. "Stop! Don't hurt me!"

"I'm checking for bites!" Dwight's voice calls out.

Arat stomps closer to Chuck. "Get away from her!" She leans down and pushes Dwight back. "You're okay, Chuck. We put it down," she says more gently. "Are you hurt?"

Chuck takes a few breaths to try to calm down. "Uh..." She knows the biter didn't sink its teeth into her, but she is still in pain. Mainly in her shoulders and back. "I'm not bit. I need to get off my back, though."

"You want up or turned?" Arat asks as she smooths Chuck's hair away from her face.

"Up." Chuck is trying not to cry in front of all the people that are now crowding around her. But it's hard. "I'll lay down in the infirmary." She just wants to get away from everyone.

Arat gently starts to get Chuck to her feet, making sure not to possibly hurt her further.

"What the holy fucking FUCK is going on here!?" Negan screams as he pushes his way through the crowd.

Chuck immediately starts to sob at the sound of Negan's voice, unable to hold back any longer. Arat rushes her into the infirmary and sets her on the bed.

"Where the fuck is Kayla?!" Negan's angry voice from the hall cuts through the walls easily.

"Where's Dr. Carson?" Chuck asks Arat, who is standing in the middle of the room.

"What?"

"Where's Dr. Carson?" Chuck repeats looking around the room. He should've been there.

"Honey," Arat responds softly and sits on the edge of the bed, "that was Dr. Carson."

"What?!" Chuck is shocked. All she saw was teeth. She didn't realize... "No. It couldn't-"

Negan rushes into the room with Kayla following. He comes right over to the bed, pushing Arat out of the way, and cups Chuck's face in his hands. "Are you hurt?" He starts to look her over frantically.

"I'm not bit," Chuck answers, still trying to understand what exactly happened.

Negan looks over every inch of Chuck's skin anyway before he turns to Arat. "Get on the fuckin' horn and get Harlan here. Right. fuckin'. now."

Arat nods. "Yes, sir." She exits quickly, closing the door behind her.

"What happened, baby girl?" Negan grabs her hands and holds them tightly in front of her belly.

"I just- It-It happened so fast." She takes a deep breath to settle herself. "I opened the door and it..." She can't help the sob that escapes her lips. It wasn't an it. It was Dr. Carson. "He knocked me down. I pushed him back and kept him from biting me."

"Did he land on your stomach?" Kayla asks from the other side of the bed.

Chuck, as well as Negan, both look to her, knowing why she's asking. "I don't think so. He landed more on my chest, I guess."

"Check it," Negan blurts out to Kayla. "Check the baby."

Kayla moves to one of the cabinets and gets out a handheld fetal Doppler device. She puts the probe on Chuck's belly and moves around. Soon, a little heartbeat rings out of the small speaker of the machine. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief. But Chuck knows that something could still happen.

"I think you should just rest until Harlan gets here," Kayla comments after she puts the Doppler instrument away.

Chuck nods and rests both hands on her stomach.

"You want me to put the bed down?" Negan asks, pointing to the inclined head of the bed.

Chuck nods and Negan adjusts the bed so that Chuck can lay down on her side. He steals the pillows from the other bed and tucks them around her belly to make sure she is comfortable.

"That good, baby girl?"

Chuck nods. "Yeah."

Negan pulls up a chair and sits next to her the whole time they wait for Harlan to arrive from Hilltop. Chuck reaches for Negan's hand and tucks it under her face, seeking that comfort.

About an hour and a half later, Harlan arrives. And he's visibly upset. "Where's my brother?" he asks instantly.

Negan doesn't turn back to answer. He just keeps his eyes on Chuck as she rests. "Check her first."

"I want to see my brother's body," Harlan says more forcefully.

Negan jumps up and turns to the man still standing by the door. "You fuckin' check her right now!" he screams in Harlan's face and points aggressively at him.

"Negan," Chuck calls out quietly. She doesn't want Negan to make things worse for Harlan. He did just lose his brother.

Negan seems to get that fact and takes a deep breath. "They took his body outside. You can see him after you fuckin' check her, okay? There's nothing you can do for your brother now, but they might be fuckin' hurt." He points behind him to Chuck.

Harlan nods and moves around Negan to check Chuck and the baby. The ultrasound looks good and Chuck doesn't have any cramping or bleeding that would be a sign of miscarriage. He looks at Chuck's back, too, and says it's just bruised and would probably be sore for a bit. He orders Chuck bedrest for the next few days, at least, just in case.

Harlan lets out a deep sigh. After he's finished. "How did it happen?"

Negan looks to Chuck, but she makes no move to answer. Not that she really knows what happened to Carson anyway. The only thing she got a good look at was teeth.

"We don't know," Negan answers. "He was the only one. I didn't really look too fuckin' close at his body."

Harlan nods. "I'll check to see... how he died. If it was fowl play..."

Negan cuts in. "Then I'll find the fucker and kill him myself."

Negan tells Kayla she can go with Harlan to look over Carson's body to determine cause of death. This leaves Chuck and Negan in the room alone.

Negan reaches over from his seat beside the bed and grabs Chuck's hand. But he doesn't look at her. He hangs his head low, his gaze to the ground.

He sighs deeply. "I don't know what more I can fucking do," he mutters almost to himself.

"What?" Chuck asks.

"It's like the universe is fucking with me. Every-fucking-thing I do to protect you fails."

"Come on, Negan." Chuck responds gently and squeezes his hand. Even though she's worried about herself and the baby, she's still worried about Negan, too. "Don't take this back step. You were doing so well."

He raises his head with a look of confusion on his face. "What are you talking about?"

"You were moving on from Lucille. Letting go of your guilt over things you couldn't control. Don't put this on you."

Chuck realizes that she has been told that very same thing before. She's felt guilt for things that really weren't her fault. She still feels guilty every once in a while. But she's had people telling her exactly the same thing she's telling Negan. And it always helped her. Even if just a little bit.

"It's my job to protect you, Chuck. It always has been. And I've fucking failed time and time again."

Chuck leans forward to sit up and cups his cheek. "I'm still here because of you. Please, Negan. I'm asking you. Don't let any of this eat you up. Please."

His eyes mist over. "We could still lose the baby," he whispers.

Chuck's own tears start to fall. "I know," she chokes out. "I'm scared, too. But if..." She doesn't want to even say it. "If it happens... I would need you so much, Negan. If you would retreat into yourself again... I couldn't get through it by myself."

He shakes his head and wipes harshly at his eyes. "I would never leave you. In any way. No matter fuckin' what." He leans forward to rest his forehead on hers. "I just want you safe," he whispers.

Kayla and Harlan come back in, both with red faces and puffy eyes. Looking at Carson's body must have been extremely hard for them.

Harlan takes a tremulous breath. "I think it was natural." He sighs and wipes his eye. "Probably a heart attack or stroke. I didn't see anything that looked like violence on his body."

Negan nods. "At least we don't have a fuckin' murderer on our hands."

Chuck clears her throat to speak up. "I'm sorry, Dr. Harlan. Emmett was a good man," she chokes out.

After a few minutes of silence, Negan, Harlan, and Kayla get Chuck into a wheelchair and use the freight elevator to get her upstairs so she can rest at home. Negan dismisses Kayla and tells Harlan to wait in his office while he gets Chuck changed into her nightshirt and into bed.

— Negan's POV —

I get Chuck into bed and tell her to yell if she needs me. I'm only gonna be a fuckin' room away, but I still don't wanna leave her. I have to talk to Harlan, though. And Chuck needs rest. She needs to stay calm and fuckin' rest. And I'm gonna do everything I fuckin' can to make sure my baby girl and my little princess are fuckin' fine.

When I go into my office, Harlan is pacing. I can't fuckin' blame him. He thought his brother was dead, got him back, then lost him a few months later. That fuckin' sucks.

"I'm sorry, man," I pat him in the shoulder.

"Yeah." He nods. "I guess I got a little bit of extra time with him, at least."

I know Carson kept in touch with his brother through the radio. So, at least they fuckin' had that.

I gesture back to my desk. "Why don't you have a seat."

He sits in the chair in front of my desk as I sit in my chair. "I already know what you're going to say."

"Good. Then I won't have to waste time telling you that you're moving here to The Sanctuary."

"Hilltop is my home. They need me."

"Did you forget that Hilltop is fuckin' mine? You work for me and I will tell you where your goddamn home is. Got it?"

He glares back at me. "I can stay and make sure Chuck and the baby are okay, but after that-"

I don't let him finish because I'm getting pissed off. "Well that's mighty fuckin' big of you, Doc, but this shit is more than just Chuck and my kid. There are two hundred fuckin' people living in this building. And another hundred in my outposts that come here for medical treatment when they fuckin' need it. How many people are at HIlltop?"

He looks away because he gets my point already. "Fifty, maybe."

"Now, if my math is fuckin' right, that's one sixth of the population we got here. And now we got no doctor. So tell me it makes more sense for me to keep you at fucking Hilltop."

He nods slowly, accepting what I'm fuckin' telling him.

"If you got a fuckin' family or a girlfriend or whatever, they can come here, too. I'm not a fuckin' monster."

"It's just me."

I nod. "You got an assistant or anything at your office?"

He clears his throat. "One of the women that you rescued and brought to Hilltop was a registered nurse before. She's been working with me."

I didn't know that one of those girls was an RN. "Those fuck heads had a nurse chained up? Jesus Christ! Medical knowledge is like fuckin' gold now and all those guys thought about was sticking their dicks in her." I shake my head. "I'm fuckin' glad I killed those bastards."

Harlan shrugs a little. "She knows her stuff."

"Then Hilltop will be fuckin' fine without you. You can always talk you your nurse assistant on the radio if she needs fuckin' help. And any Hillfolk that need you are more than fuckin' welcome to come here. I'll talk to Jesus later about it." Jesus is gonna be pissed, but what-the-fuck-ever. He'll get over it.

Harlan nods again. I can tell he's not fuckin' happy about moving here, but he can see that it makes more fuckin' sense for him to be where there are more people in need of his goddamn services.

"Carson's room was on the first floor," I explain, "just down the hall from the infirmary. That will be your room. But if you don't wanna stay there tonight, if you want it fuckin' cleaned out first, I'll provide you another room."

"No." he answers quickly. "I can stay there. I want to clean it out myself."

I nod. If that's what he wants to do, I'll let him. "So..." I take a deep breath and lean forward on the desk, not really wanting to ask, but I have to. "What is the outlook for Chuck and the baby?"

He shrugs. "Everything sounds good. And there wasn't any trauma to the stomach. But I can't say definitively. We'll just have to wait and see."

I lean back into my chair and scrub an my face with my hand. "How long?"

"A few days. If there's no bleeding or cramping, then she can resume normal activities. But she should try to stay in bed until then."

"Oh, she fuckin' will."

I dismiss Harlan and go back into the bedroom. Chuck is laying on her side, her hand lazily rubbing on her stomach. And I can tell that she's fuckin' crying.

"You okay, baby girl?" I sit on the edge of the bed beside her and set my hand on her shoulder.

"She's kicking," is all she says. Then she laughs a little. Like the weight of the world is off her fuckin' shoulders. But it's also cautious, like she doesn't want to accept it, yet.

I move my other hand to her belly and feel the movement, too. And I laugh in the same fuckin' way she did.